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pettyotome · 4 months ago

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Into The Devil's Psyche - Chapter One

Summary: In a twist of fate, Akari becomes his patient.

Read: here.

The first time he saw her, he was taken aback, and it seems that she was too. But unlike him, she wore it all on her face. She looked at him with sharp, cautious eyes, like she was on the verge of figuring something out– but just couldn’t quite pin exactly what that was.

“Sorry,” she finally spoke, and with clarity, “You just look a lot like Cynthia, but in glasses.”

And you look a lot like Akari.

It was a thought he considered articulating out loud, just to see how she’d react. But that would be inappropriate, she was here as his patient, after all.

“Please, no need for apologies.” He widened the door, gesturing for her to come in, “Welcome, Miss Yukimura.”

She gives him a faint smile before stepping forward, a designer handbag hangs from her wrist as she walks in, shoulders pointed in her rose gold dress coat. It was a bit jarring to see her so… poised in the way she carried herself, strutting into a therapy session like it was a runway show. He’d gotten glimpses of her on TV and through a billboard once or twice– in this new reality, she seemed too glamourous to have even been real.

And that only made him resent Arceus even more, not only for choosing her, but for making her untouchable in this lifetime as well.

“Oh my gosh, is that a Growlithe over there?” Her eyes lifted in excitement over at the corner of the office as she made herself comfortable on the plush sofa across from his chair.

The Growlithe perks up at her presence in the room, doing a little hop from his little napping corner, making a cute, enthusiastic walk over to the couch.

“Yes, it is. I hope you don’t mind, he’s a Therapy Pokemon.” He smiled warmly as he shut the door from behind him, approaching his desk for his notes.

“Not at all! I never had these the last time I was in therapy.” She pats the empty spot next to her, and Growlithe jumps up there. She cups his face with her hands in affectionate glee.

“I see, well, I hope that it can provide you great comfort whenever you need it here.”

“I’d give you a five star review just for this cute little Growlithe!”

He gives her a laugh, and uses the moment she’s distracted by Growlithe’s company to take another look at her file sitting next to his notepad. It seemed that he was referred to her by Cynthia.

Her name, written in bold, was Hikari Yukimura. Twenty-seven years old. To the rest of the world, she was Sinnoh’s Champion, a world renowned fashion designer, coordinator, award winning actress, and a pop star. But to the medical world? She was just like any other headcase who’d been in and out of therapy ever since she was fifteen, her notes were detailed with a long list of mental health issues and substance abuse that she ended up in rehab for a couple of times. But so far, she’d shown great strides in her overall emotional well being in the past recent years.

He looked back at her with suspicion, she looked blissfully ignorant enough while playing with Growlithe, but he couldn’t write this off the similarity in her name and her likeness to Akari as a coincidence.

“Fifteen feet apart, right?” He made note of the sensitive information on her file.

Apparently, Mesprit decided to gift her with the magical ability to feel other people’s thoughts and emotions, within fifteen feet of her. It made sense. Akari always had a stronger link to Mesprit out of all the Lake Guardians.

“Yes, please.” Hikari said, with a bit of stress hanging onto her voice.

“Of course. I can only imagine how straining it is for you to have to internalize other people’s psyche, and this should be a safe space for you.” He smiles at her, but what he really means is that he wouldn’t want her to have access to his thoughts either.

“Thank you… it sounds nifty in theory but in practice… I just want peace, you know? And it ends up not being all it’s cracked up to be.” She says, resentment fills her voice.

He’s curious to know, but it wouldn’t be wise to push so early into the session on their first meeting. He still had a PHD to uphold.

“Is that what brings you into therapy today, Hikari?” He asks, pen and notepad in hand as he sits on the chair across from her.

Her lips part a little as she rests her hand on Growlithe’s head. She looks off to the side, like she’s ashamed to not have an answer prepared for this session. Or maybe, she was embarrassed about her reasons, whatever they may be. But still he waited, relaxing his shoulders into the cushion of the chair.

“Oh, no it’s not. I’m sorry, I…” Hikari sighed, a cloud of exhaustion leaving her lips, “It’s been awhile since I’ve done this and… I just feel stupid since I thought I was over it, I thought I conquered it, and… I just didn’t think I’d be at this place again.”

“What is it that you thought you were over?” His voice is very soothing when he asks.

“The nightmares. I had a lot of them when I was fifteen, it was a constant voice in my head, always telling me that the world is better off without me, that I’m not a real hero, because I couldn’t save Cyrus. That my existence… It's done nothing but cause problems and make people worry about me needlessly, and the only reason why they do, is because I can’t do anything right. Because the truth is, I’m not a monument, I’m a burden.” She’s deep inside her own head, it’s like she’s drowning when she speaks, only managing to keep her head above the water for every well thought out sentence, and she doesn’t even take a breath after she’s done, “That’s what the voice says, at least.”

He’d read about the big take down between her, Cynthia and Cyrus in the Distortion World. Cyrus was Cyllene’s descendant, it was sort of funny, how the tables turned. And yet even so, history would still repeat itself.

“This voice, do you feel like you know why it’s come back in your life now?” He’d read her file, so he knew of how much Cyrus had affected her, and the following events that spiraled after.

The media had penned her a classless teenage diva who liked to brawl with the paparazzi, and she’d been admitted to rehab after falling hard and headfirst into a gambling addiction. It dawned on him how good she was at lying to the world. She did not come with a pretty past.

“There's been some backlash about my documentary that just came out...” She let out a heavy sigh, “and normally, I can take criticism, but it came from Cyrus’s mother, who is suffering from dementia in a nursing home right now because of me, and she says that I took away her only son. That her son is dead because of me. That I brought disgrace upon the Akagi family name. The interview she did on me was pretty brutal, and I know, I’ve been told it’s not really my fault but… I just keep thinking if it was my own mom, I’d never want to devastate her like that. And yet I did that to someone else’s mother, because I never thought of Cyrus as someone who had a family, a mom who was worried sick about him. I forgot that he was a human, just like me.”

He listened intently, while jotting down notes. On his notepad were the words: guilt ridden, unresolved emotions, possible unresolved trauma…

“I’ve also been having relationship problems with my ex of all people, and old memories I didn’t even know I had are coming back up again… just a lot of bad things happening to me at the same time.”

… and finally, he wrote down in a big circle and underlined: Recalling old memories? From 1870 Hisui? Circle back with patient later.

“Maybe hearing all of this from Cyrus’s mother has triggered feelings from your fifteen year old self. It happens.” He clicked his pen, and crossed his legs, “Have you considered the possibility that Cyrus’s mother is just using your name as a scapegoat from holding her son accountable for his actions? That she’s not coming from the right place blaming you, but rather, you’re just the easiest thing for her to be angry at?”

He could see from across the room, her eyes relaxing reluctantly, as if she could consider what he said, but that it was too… easy to accept.

“So, what? You’re saying she’s just angry at me for no reason?” Hikari says, as if finding his response preposterous, “I gave that woman dementia and her husband left her to rot in a nursing home. Certainly her hatred towards me isn't completely unfounded.”

“If I’m being honest, Hikari, Cyrus sounds like a man whose problems started with his parents. But to be quite frank, I’m not interested in dissecting his past, or psychoanalyzing his parents, because he’s not my patient, you are. You’re here, and you matter. And I’m here to tell you that you did not give his mother dementia.” He says with a swift sharpness that leaves no room for interruption, “Unfortunate events unfolded because of HIS actions, you were just the one to shed light on them. And who knows what kind of world we’d live in if he were the one who won? His mothers blissful ignorance would’ve come to an end either way.”

He kicked himself for saying so. His words rang true, and yet, why did he feel as if he was lying through his teeth? Did he identify with Cyrus? Or did it make him feel uneasy to validate the woman whose life was so obviously charmed yet again by Arceus– was it a brewing bitterness inside his stomach, he wondered.

“I suppose you’re right.” She said, letting go of the reluctance in her voice.

That was enough to snap him out of his spiraling thoughts.

“We can’t control how people handle the truth… but I gotta say, it’s a fucking bitch.” She laughs, but it’s out of misery, like it would make more sense for her to cry instead.

“It’s not unreasonable to feel the way you’re feeling, when you’re being blamed for unveiling the nasty truth about a person everyone loved.” He says, because he knows better than to hate her, “And I get the feeling that you’re the kind of person who doesn’t let someone’s true colors stay in hiding for too long. Don’t be ashamed of that, so many people wish they had your courage.”

“You know… back when Team Galactic was a thing, I used to get so angry that more people weren’t trying to do something about them. I’d ask myself, why are people just sitting around, letting these people steal people’s Pokemon, deface historical statues, and blow up lakes?” Hikari speaks with a crack in her voice, “No one ever told me how hard it would actually be to play a hero. That's why there’s so little of us. I don’t regret it, but the world lit me on fire for exposing Sinnoh’s cherished architect, when they were the ones begging for someone else to save them from Team Galactic. I did what was asked, and all I have to show for it is my chronic depression, a long list of rehab records, and a half assed apology from the rest of the world.”

“The real burden was never you, Hikari. But rather, the greatness you’ve had to carry” He says kind, but firm, and he’d pause before speaking again, “They never tell us what goes on behind the scenes of a coveted celebrity, or a treasured hero, they only share the glory. But that’s a good thing, you see, because when people are faced with the reality of it all, they’re forced to assess if who they are is in line with what they want. And for the most part, even if they want the glory, they’re just not cut out for it, they don’t have the character, the discipline.”

“Are you saying that I should consider myself lucky that Arceus picked me for this crazy, messed up gig?” There’s a lightness to her voice, a curve at the corner of her mouth.

And he swallows, forcing a smile. Though she might not have meant it that way, the fact that she felt the need to remind him she was chosen, stung him in the chest.

“I’m saying that I honestly don’t think you’d give up all of this just to be like everyone else.” He wants to call her out on the privilege she holds, for not knowing how good she truly has it, “Can you honestly say that you yearn for a normal life? That none of it feels right for you, even through the pain? That you weren’t meant to be who you are, doing what you do for people right now?”

“...I wouldn’t.” She says, observing her wrists, decadent with pristine jewels. It was almost like she actually gave his question some thought.

And if she truly did, then he could bite his tongue around her, because he couldn’t let his perception of her give him away all too soon.

“Good.” He says, with a hint of approval in his voice, “Because I’d hate to think that the people in this world that become great, aren’t worthy of it.”

“So, are you saying that I am worthy, then?” Hikari’s eyes sharpened playfully at him.

And from this angle, the cat-like smile she gave him, he could see the woman that she is, she was no longer a child, no longer the empty headed amnesiac who showed no expression, no. Now, she’d become something more… striking.

Something that he wasn’t prepared to handle.

“I think…” He swallows, knowing to choose his words carefully, “That you don’t strike me as the kind of woman who would need my validation.”

“Why thank you, Dr. Miyashita.” She takes it as a compliment, as he hoped she would.

He can see that she looks to him with a newfound admiration and liking to him in her eyes, and there’s a part of him that finds humor in the fact that he was helping Akari yet again. So, he smiles, putting his faith in Arceus once more.

“Please, call me Volo.”

#pokemon legends arceus #volo #volokari #wieldershipping #girl idk tags anymore

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