pelicans-redbull-vending-machine

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seeing straight men be disgusted by booktok smut recommenders has actually radicalized me to the side of booktok smut recommenders. girls your taste may be atrocious but i will never disparage you for exposing mainstream discourse to the concept of soaking through your underwear. spent my whole life listening to men talk about penises it’s about time they get jumpscared by women talking about pussy in crude detail on social media. go forth and goon my warriors

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I would like to preface this by saying that I am a leftist who has lived under the poverty line for her entire life, and has been a nicotine addict for the past 6 years.

Right wing media and other conservatives want poor people to be addicted to nicotine - simple as that. They’re attacking “left” wing (it’s just doctors and concerned parents) people and groups who are advocating for harder restrictions on nicotine and tobacco products, stating that “the left doesn’t want you to enjoy personal adult freedoms”. Which is A.) not accurate. And B.) blatantly hypocritical.

Right Wingers don’t “advocate for personal adult freedoms” because they actually care about the personal rights and liberties of lower class individuals. Right-wingers want lower class people to spend all their money buying 3-4 $5/$6/$7 packs of cigarettes/zyns/vapes a day so that they can’t spend money on anything else. All that money goes into the pockets of Big Tobacco, who are lobbying congress to get less strict restrictions on access to nicotine. All this while spreading propaganda about entire ethnic and race groups being the precipice of America’s drug addiction problem. As if seeing the 100s of packs of cigarettes behind a gas station counter aren’t analogous to cartoonish hands of smoke, beckoning young people toward anxiety, popcorn lung, and in very many cases…cancer.

So, yes…….while you do have the personal freedom to enjoy a smoke, or a bit of your vape, or a lil upper decky mouth pillow to cope with the inevitable creep of death and pain, I would like 2 things to be gathered from this post.

1.) any industry that averages a MONTLY revenue of $76B on addictive products is not worried about your personal freedoms. They just want your fucking money. Rich people want to feed poor people the addictive, the highly processed, and the sometimes deadly products that will line their pockets, and keep us in poverty.

2.) if Right-Wingers actually cared about personal rights and liberties, the anti-trans debate wouldn’t exist. If Daryl has the right to enjoy the “personal adult freedom” of smoking some reds after his construction job, Jessica has the right to identify as whatever the fuck she/they/he/it/xe/ want to identify as.

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i wish i had a gay cigarette

[pelicans-redbull-vending-machine]

my fursona is an ethereal entity floating above the atmosphere in a pink-and-white haze. They are nothing and everything at the same time. Beautiful, mysterious, and horrific to all that behold them.

My IRL self is a fucking burnt out college student who runs off of zyn and redbull and 100% has not washed their hoodie in like 3 weeks.

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bro your whimsy. you forgot your fucking whimsy. your solemn and somber attitude is scaring the hoes

[pelicans-redbull-vending-machine]

Just a compilation of Shane saying things that sound like Tumblr shitposts.

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they traumatized a man with big brown doe eyes and a slutty waist and they want me to be normal about it ?

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Ryan saying "profussy" was not on my 2025 Puppet History bingo card

[transcript under the cut because I need to archive this]

Brennan: Everything downstairs is one-to-one with human anatomy.

Professor: I wouldn't say one-to-one.

Brennan: Yeah.

Professor: Do you know what a cloaca is?

Brennan: Do you have more history facts or -?

Professor: Yeah, why don't we move on to that.

Brennan: Great. Wonderful.

Ryan: No, let's get more into the lore of his profussy. I'd love to hear about it.

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the ghost of one specific homosexual cowboy regularly possesses Tumblr gays

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everyone and their puppet history theories

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I'm not a trans role model or a queer mom or whatever. I'm a dirtbag burnout commie hedonist who's gonna tell you to stop trying to please people when you're still fuckin miserable and then strongly suggest you go drop acid or suck some dick in a bathroom until you stop caring about laws and social norms. Trans liberation begins with self liberation, stop hoping for an easy guide to being trans and instead tread the path of mutilation until you've carved out everything false within yourself

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In a truck stop bathroom washing my hands today and 2 boys, looked about 5 and 9, came in with their little sister who looked maybe 2. The following whispered conversation made my entire day

"We have to wait, there's a lady in here!"

"That's not a lady, he has a mustache! We can be in here!"

"Some ladies have mustaches! And she has boobs!"

"Well some guys have boobs! Like Uncle Jake!"

"Uncle Jake is fat!"

At this point I could not contain a chuckle and both whirled around with identical looks of panic on their faces. I smiled and said "it's alright for you guys to be in here so your sister has help, don't worry. And I'm both! That's why I have boobs and a mustache. Some folks are just built that way"

(In unison) "Ooooooh!"

(older boy) "So do you use Sir or Ma'am or both?"

"Both, but I prefer Sir"

"Cool! Well thanks Sir! We have to help our sister now!"

This was in a small town country truck stop and both boys had "Murica" type stuff on and neither of them had any issue at all with these concepts. Their mom approached me while I was in line about 10 minutes later and apologized for them bothering me in the bathroom (they had told her about the interaction) and she and I had a lovely little chat too. I got to introduce her to the term "intersex" and her reply was "I think I've heard of that before! I didn't know that was the word for it. Amazing how many different ways God can make people!"

Sometimes the world is good. More often than you might think, if you give it a chance. It's not all bad loves <3

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never, ever, stop fighting back

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