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Wish you could louder?? Well. Try tlaking into 🎤 the michaelphone.

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A PSA about trucks from a truck driver

I and some colleagues were talking about how we wish everyone could see the safety videos that our company was showing us, because I don’t think most people understand how traffic works in a truck. So here’s some things we wish everyone on the road knew.

- we’re not kidding about tailgating. If you’re right behind us on a straight highway? Chances are we have NO IDEA you’re there, which means we can’t anticipate any of your movements. Plus slowing down takes multiple downshifts, so we might start decreasing speed way earlier than you expect.

- We’re not kidding about any of our blind spots. WE CAN’T SEE YOU, GUYS.

- That bit about slowing down taking a while? The same goes for when you’re in front of us. Don’t cut off a truck. Oh god, PLEASE don’t cut off a truck. If you cut me off, I’m not irritated, I’m terrified. For YOU. It can take 7 to 9 seconds for us to stop. DON’T CUT OFF TRUCKS.

- Before you get mad about how slow we’re going on the highway, keep in mind that many companies govern their vehicles so they literally CAN’T go over 60 or 65. This is a good thing, I promise. Because…

- Do you know what happens when a car meets a truck in an accident? The car gets totaled and the truck needs a new coat of paint. You will not win this fight. I know nobody likes getting stuck behind a big dumb truck, but it’s not worth your life.

We are trying our best to protect you from our 80,000 pound death machines. Please help us out.

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having ADHD will have you going round your house saying aloud, "Okay, so if I were me, and me is a dumb fuck, where the hell would I put X," and you still can't find it

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Sleepy kitties

Tip jar

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hey cis people! now more than ever gender-nonconforming behavior is an act of resistance! and it's one anyone can engage in!

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Remember when you'd turn on the radio and almost always Poker Face was playing

Back when God was still listening

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Oh yeah, I know them, we grew up together on tumblr.com

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what a way to announce your skills issue anyway how long is y'all's longest internet friendship, mine is 14 years

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U can fuck with someone heavily on here and not even follow them but nobody is ready for this kind of love

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beginning to suspect that if I ever want to have a published novel I will have to actually write a novel, which is frankly ghoulish

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pirate who's worried mermaids are gonna fuck his girlfriends: me fear fish want me women

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me being so normal when there’s only vague plans to hang out for the day nobody is texting back with specific times or what we’re doing

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it’s so evil when you have a beverage and you drink it and then there’s no beverage anymore

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[remembers suicide jokes are bad for my mental health] YOU should kill yourself

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“there’s no platonic explanation for this” clearly you’ve never been madly in love with your best friends but in like a friendship way