paragontology

[paragontology]

one time a ranger 1 (so not law enforcement) at the state park where i worked was getting rid of a bunch of clothes so he put them all in garbage bags and dropped them off at the bunkhouse where all the seasonal employees lived and he said we could go through them before he donated them and we all took a tshirt or two and then a month later we were throwing a party and I was like "we should all wear his clothes to the party" and he came in and it took him like an hour and five drinks to suddenly be like "wait a minute.................."

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?? on my post with a recording from a decommissioned satellite

[paragontology]

I completely flooded the back of house today and everyone failed to react like a human. The person who noticed tried to alert me by standing directly behind me, pointing at the floor, and going ‘water’. And when I turned and looked, all I could muster was ‘oh thats cool.’ Really calmly.

And then my manager darted for the mop bucket like CAN YOU TWO DO SOMETHJNG PLEASE STOP JUST WATCHING IT

[paragontology]

My Fox McCloud tulpa i made to help me drive: "Good merge kid, at this rate youll be a first rate pilot"

Me: "thanks captain, but uhh h, idk if your paw should be in my jeans while i drive"

last pure hearted man: "i hope god doesnt noticr me jaywalking"

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[paragontology]

www.donaldtrumpweed.com

[paragontology]

when you come out your shit is still there

[paragontology]

billie eilish is dressing like a bad guy thug at a mahjong game in a kung fu movie

[paragontology]

Oh i get it now. I'm going crazy

[paragontology]

my phone isn’t charging even though i plugged her innnnn dramatic ass bitch. YOUR PUSSY IS FILLED! WHAT MORE COULD YOU WANT

[paragontology]

A mindful notification I received this morning from Catherine Shannon’s substack

[paragontology]

compilation

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© Emil Melmoth

[paragontology]

Hate when my homie says “hey look at this” and I look down and it’s just an ill portent of things to come.

[paragontology]

Happy new year!! 🎆🎊🎉🥂

[paragontology]

Murder-suicide note that says, "You should see the other guy."