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Pascal Blanché

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it is simply not a midwest festival without a corn pit

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yup i caramelized some onions last night. basically you fucking wish you were me right now *a massive demon centipede bursts through the wall* oh fuck! *i produce my holy lightning tommy gun and riddle that sucker with a hail of thunderous bullets* fuck!!!! fuck!!!!!!!!

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conquistadors saw a potato and said daddy

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god is punishing me because i have tumblr

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She’s on morphine

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Steve Epting - GIJoe Duke

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“I asked ChatGPT —”

Okay well I asked the picture of Michael Jackson in my pocket and he told me to get the fries with my burger soooo

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an underrecognised tragedy of AI slop isn't just that any piece of contemporary art could be AI, any news reel could be AI, it's that now just any video of something vaguely nice and whimsical happening in the world could be AI

this is about the trampoline bunnies

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victorian trans guy who goes to beloved local barber sweeney todd and presses half a crown in his hand and says “begging your pardon sir, i know it ain’t much but i was hoping you might tell my employer i get me shaves from you should he ever come around. only he’s been asking me how i keep my chin so smooth and i haven’t the heart to tell him i can’t grow a beard, so i might have told him a little lie, sir, and said it’s all due to your wonderful skill, sir” and sweeney todd goes “no problem. by the way would you say your employer deserves to die”

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me: "hey i think i might be bisexual."

friend: "that's cool, thanks for letting me know."

lois griffin after getting turned into a gas station:

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ザビ【ZABI】

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