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going on my 7th year in college and i will always be amazed by how little we know about college administration and how no one wants to tell you anything that deviate a little bit of their usual problems. like 3 people can not answer me the same shit when they are not from the same units

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"im tired of living through major historical events" is now "dear lord please let me witness a high profile political assassination in the next 1-2 years. amen"

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Another portrait of Joong Archen (Thai actor). I'm absolutely in love with his facial features and fierce (yet cute and harmless) expression

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16min practice

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sooooooooooo i havent been able to pint point exactly what it is about the show that makes me not fully love it and i think is the way is directed/filmed? color and aesthetics aside, i dont really like the way the camera aims to the actors and how, specially in the kisses scenes, they are in diagonal so you see them in this weird(? angel. idk, i get sometimes is for specific purposes (funcionality, emotion, yada yada yada) but i just cant find myself liking it

this angle, or whatever angle they are aiming, makes the whole thing kinda awkward and fake; like, the actors have proven to be able to emulate whatever genre the show is in, but the shots with them in it makes me not able to engage in the scene.

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Black Sails • XXI. "That has been the problem all along. That's the thing Gates never understood and a thing you never understood."

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is anyone obsessed lately with the height difference of joong and dunk? like i know is not a really big gap but in the make out prison session you kinda see how dunk is getting a tiny little bit taller and I AM LIVING FOR IT

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to ME free! is about having to grow up too fast and make decisions too early, it's about wishing the summer and school days could last a little longer, it's about wanting to put your all, your whole self into your dreams and aspirations, to lose yourself in your passions but life and expectations and responsibilities keep pulling you back to reality, it's about being thrown into a capitalistic society and told your hobbies are only worth something if you can monetise them or be the best at them, it's about being told to grow up and move on and be realistic when that's the last thing you want to do, it's about wanting to be young and eternal and splashing in the water with your friends forever, it's about all of that being impossible and yet there is still light at the end of the tunnel, hope is not lost

but it's not really about all that (it is) because it's a sports anime about swimming

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This was after the hug, Fadel’s tears, the slow dance, the I have fallen for you, the kiss. Fadel had made up his mind. He would take what he could get—Style’s smell, the shape of his mouth, the taste of his skin—one last time. He knew it was over, could feel it seething between his lungs, the anger a quiet whir in the back of his head. He looked into Style’s eyes for a moment after they broke apart, and he thought of collapsing the facade, of grabbing his shoulders and shaking a confession out of those beautiful, lying lips. But Style simply looked back, smiling, unwavering, clueless. Did you really think I would not find out?

They were to spend the night in Fadel’s room. Style was tired. He went quiet at times in the night—a part of him Fadel was sure no one else knew. It was as if he gave out his spark in constant bouts, leaving little to himself in the final hours of the day. The loudest people can be the loneliest, Fadel thought, fleetingly.

“Fadel,” Style whispered. He was sitting on the foot of Fadel’s bed, the smile, though tired, reaching his eyes. His hair was wet. He had just showered, and was in grey sweats and a black band tshirt that Fadel swore wasn’t cropped a few weeks back. Style raised both arms up, asking for a hug, asking Fadel to kill the space between them. “Why are you so far?”

Fadel didn’t say anything. He watched Style; the droplets lining his neck, one by one, pooling in the milky collarbones; those wild pretty brows that were surprisingly relaxed, not challenging him like they always did. He looked so good, so harmless. Fadel wanted to jump out of his own fucking skin. He walked, measured, towards him. Style’s shoulders perked up, a light in his face. He wrapped his arms around Fadel’s neck when Fadel bowed to let him, and they held each other’s eyes. Fadel stayed there. Say it. Say something. His mind was a jumble. Why won’t you say anything? But Style sat there, expectant. Fadel tightened his brows and quickly, like reflex, grabbed Style’s jaw. Maybe he’d scare a confession out of him, he thought. Maybe that’ll get him to explain himself, to swear to Fadel that Bison was wrong and that he didn’t betray him, that he wasn’t lying when he said he loved and wanted him. Fadel’s fingers left white prints where they pushed the skin. But Style stayed as he was, trusting. Fadel searched his face, searched for a silver of a clue, but found none. It pissed him off. Why was Style’s guard down? Why was he so fucking calm? Why wasn’t he afraid, still smiling, still ready to give his body, down to the bone, to Fadel? Fadel dug his nails into the skin, knuckles white, and Style titled his head ever so slightly to kiss the part of Fadel’s hand he could reach. “I miss you,” he said. “I was so worried that your shop was closed. I thought I was going insane.”

Fadel didn’t understand this. He didn’t know how to react. He was angry. He wanted him. He wanted him so much. He wanted to say goodbye. He didn’t want to kill him. He didn’t want to let go. He didn’t want this to end.

“Why?” He said, a choked breath.

It was Style’s turn to frown. He looked confused. “What?”

Fadel snapped out of it. Immediately. His fingers relaxed around Style’s jaw. He took a breath, grounded himself. “Nothing.” An exhale. “Come here.”

The kiss was slow, deep. Fadel couldn’t close his eyes. He kissed him, watched when he could. It felt wrong, but he needed to do this, one final time.

Style slipped out of his own shirt. It came off beautifully, his hair crowned with a shimmer. He looked up in quiet excitement at Fadel, who was standing now, taking his own shirt and pants off.

Style pushed himself to lie on the bed then wrapped his arms around Fadel’s back as Fadel climbed over him. They looked at each other. It was never like this between them. Fadel was suddenly aware of it all. Of the sounds their bodies were making against his sheets. Of the difference between them, in size and mannerism, the pace of their breaths, how Style’s gentle thrill was getting the better of him, how Fadel’s limbs were stiffening up in response, his trust in Style completely shattered.

Style raised his head up and kissed him again. Fadel tasted peppermint, fruit candy and sweetness. He wanted this. He wanted lifetimes of this.

“Fadel,” Style whispered against his mouth and stroked the back of his neck. “Did you think about me while you were gone—“

Fadel slipped his tongue in to shut him up. He didn’t want to admit the answer. I did. Every night.

They kissed, again, and again, shed off the rest of their clothes. It was different this time, the silence a creature in its own right. Fadel kissed Style’s body carefully. He left no part untouched. Style’s breaths came in quiet moans as he held onto Fadel tightly, always following his gaze, always trying to show him it felt good. And it did. It felt so fucking good, like fire, like martyrdom. But Fadel avoided Style’s eyes when he was inside, his face turned as he moved, slowly, carefully, awkwardly. His heart hurt. It shouldn’t be like this. It was never like this. He kissed Style’s neck when it became unbearable. And Style kissed him back, wherever he could, his jaw, his chin, his cheek, holding on tighter with each motion. Why? Fadel’s tears burned.

“Fadel,” Style closed his eyes and whispered as his head fell back. He bit hard onto his lips. Fadel went deeper, and watched, detached. “Fadel.”

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a very incomplete list of cdramas (plus a few chinese films) i've watched and my rating for hsk proficiencies for them below the cut!

i've watched some shows that aren't included on this list, but i didn't watch enough of them to get a good sense for the level of challenge they pose, so they're omitted from the list. i've also included links to the mydramalist pages, if you want to get a sense of the plot.

i had to remove the list format, since tumblr decided i had too many characters per block of text, so i apologise for that. a number of these can be watched on youtube with english fansubs, but if you can't find something, you can always dm me and i'll get you a link!

沙海/tomb of the sea: this fits into the extended daomu biji/grave robbers' chronicles/lost tomb franchise, but you don't have to have seen the other shows or read the books to watch it, and the pov character is an outsider who also doesn't understand what's going on 90% of the time. this show is contemporary, and you could probably start watching it at a fairly low hsk level because it doesn't have a ton of complicated technical or genre-specific terms. the subbing in english decent, since it came out a while ago, but there are some errors that crop up with names and nicknames. if you wanted to watch it without subtitles, i'd say you could probably get the gist of what's being said at around an hsk 4 or hsk 5 level. it has 52 episodes, each around 45 minutes long. (mdl link)

双镜/couple of mirrors: set in the republican era, so some of the terms used are a bit outdated in terms of colloquialism, and it also has a mystery/detective element to it, so that could pose a bit of a struggle. that said, the show isn't actually too challenging in terms of vocab—i would say you could watch it without english subtitles at an hsk 3 level with some struggle, and with a fair amount of ease at hsk 4. 12 episodes, at 46 minutes each. (mdl link)

云泽传/legend of yunze: wuxia/xianxia, which makes the amount of unfamiliar terms higher if you aren't used to the genre, but the episodes are all very short, and the plot itself isn't overly complicated, which makes it easy to sit down and watch in one go. on a level of difficulty, as long as you're familiar with wuxia/xianxia terms, you could probably watch this at an hsk 2 level without too much issue, and the subbing in english is very thorough. has multiple seasons, but the first season is 12 episodes, between 3-7 minutes each. (mdl link)

神探/detective l: this is a procedural detective show, and it's set in the 1930s republican shanghai, so there's a combination of more formal/outdated language and specialised detective/case-related phrases. the english subs are decent, though, and the actors all enunciate clearly, which helps if you need to look up words. i would say this would probably be a bit of a struggle below the hsk 5 level, but you'll pick up a lot of new, crime-related phrases. 24 episodes, 40 minutes each. (mdl link)

不良执念清除师/oh no! here comes trouble!: i'll be honest, this one was a struggle for me because of the taiwanese accent. i can understand what they're saying, it just sounds like the auditory equivalent of someone coming into my house and moving everything a few centimetres to the left. this is also a procedural show, but contemporary, so not quite as challenging in terms of vocab to detective l, in my opinion..........but it's also got a heavy supernatural element, which does come with specific vocab. the subbing is good, but if you're going to watch it, this one probably requires a higher hsk level to keep up—hsk 5, at a minimum, in my opinion. 12 episodes, 52 minutes each. (mdl link)

s.c.i谜案集/sci mystery/sci: another contemporary procedural mystery show, but from the mainland, so there's no elements of supernatural. surprisingly simple vocabulary; you could watch this at an hsk 2 level and get the gist, and an hsk 3 or hsk 4 level would let you watch it just fine. has fairly good english subs, and i believe they set the show in hk, which accounts for the higher than usual amount of english usage, up to and including in dialogue. the only bit that might make it challenging is the heavy lean into the psychology, but it's all largely explained directly, since most of the characters aren't familiar with the terms either. 24 episodes, 45 minutes each. (mdl link)

成化十四年/sleuth of the ming dynasty: ming dynasty (mid 1400s, under the chenghua emperor) setting, but a fairly colloquial vocabulary. there are some specialised titles used, but those are fairly self-evident by the way the show is shot, and easy enough to look up. the english subs are good, and i would put this at an hsk 4 level—but even at an hsk 3 level you probably won't struggle too badly. my hangup here was, again, one of the leads being played by an actor with a taiwanese accent, though it's not too heavy. 48 episodes, 45 minutes each. (mdl link)

老九门/the mystic nine: dmbj prequel, set in the tail end of the republican era (1939, if i remember correctly?). has a lot of tomb- and tomb-robbing specific vocabulary, alongside the more dated modes of speech, so i would put this up at an hsk 5 or hsk 6 level, but there's decent subs, so you could watch it at lower levels, it would just be a bit of a challenge. 48 episodes, 42 minutes each. (mdl link)

猎罪图鉴/under the skin: contemporary procedural show; there's a lot of emotion- and motive-specific words used, and the fact that it's a procedural makes it a bit more challenging, in my opinion. i would recommend that don't start with this show, just because of the fact that it's pretty easy to get lost if you don't grasp some of the vocabulary. i'd put it at an hsk 6 level, but that said, the subs are good and you can watch it at an hsk 5 level with some effort, i think. 20 episodes, 45 minutes each. (mdl link)

春风沉醉的夜晚/spring fever: honestly not as challenging in terms of vocabulary as a lot of things on this list, and fairly contemporary (set in the 2000s). i would say if you're at an hsk 4 level, you will probably do alright with it. 116 minutes in total. (mdl link)

关于我和鬼变成家人的那件事/marry my dead body: another case of struggling to acclimate to the taiwanese accent; otherwise, not too complicated in terms of vocab, though there are some spirit/marriage-specific terms used. overall, though, i'd put this at an hsk 4 level as well. 130 minutes in total. (mdl link)

陈情令/the untamed: heavy on the wuxia/xianxia elements, so unless you're familiar with that, you might struggle a lot to get through it. this is a lot of peoples' entry into cdramas, though, so it's not utterly inaccessible, and has decent english subs. i would put this around an hsk 5, if you want to watch it without subs, though you'll probably still have to pause and look up some words here and there even then. 50 episodes, 45 minutes each, making it the longest on this list. (mdl link)

山河令/word of honour: arguably the hardest on this list, i would say, because it's so plot-heavy. i, as a native speaker, struggle to follow along with this for extended amounts of time because there's a combination of 1. a lot happening, 2. a lot of wuxia terms, and 3. a lot of references to literature/art/etc. i would put this up at an hsk 7 level, honestly. that said, the subs for this are very good. 36 official episodes with a 37th mini-episode, 45 minutes each for the regular ones. (mdl link)

天官赐福/heaven official's blessing: one of the easier shows on this list; i would put this at an hsk 3 or hsk 4 level; there's some words you probably won't know, but while it does fall under xianxia, it doesn't go into that as much in terms of vocabulary as cql/the untamed does. i believe both seasons have both official subbing and official dubbing into english available, but that's not how i watched it, and i've only seen the first season, which is 11 episodes and about 20 minutes per episode. (mal link)

致命游戏/the spirealm: not particularly challenging in terms of actual vocab, but as of yet, only the first few episodes are subbed, since it came out literally this month, and the other subs are all auto-generated and.............very lacking. that said, it's a contemporary setting, and i would put this at an hsk 5 level, give or take; there are some references to folklore, but the characters research and explain or deduce the explanations of what is happening as it occurs, and you aren't left to struggle to figure it out yourself. 78 episodes, but each one is a bit under 20 minutes long, so it actually isn't that much content in total. (mdl link)

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I have a lot of sympathy for Flint bc its like he's part of the world shittiest, shittiest group project. He's begging everyone on his knees to just read their section and make their power point slides, but instead Vane is like "no Im gonna write a freestyle rap about my part"

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asldfKJSLDLDFJ Joong your comedic timing is ✨ PERFECTION ✨

no but actually I have SO much sympathy for Fadel because, unlike Bison who's boyfriend does actually have some experience being on the other side of the law, Fadel has to deal a full blown civilian insisting on throwing himself into danger whilst knowing that he absolutely cannot stop him because he bloody loves him too much to make him upset like this again it's just... it's SO GOOD!!!

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something i find so asnvgifdnsfoisanfa about black sails is that eleanor does not give a flying fuck about anything but everyone cares so much what she does what she says what everything around her means and she is just genuinealy doing what she wants and care and the viewer hating her is following the narrative of hating just because

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Something about Fadel not breaking down over Mother killing his parents because he had to hold it together for Bison like the oldest brother he is, then later running to the bleachers to cry over his dead boyfriend by himself because that's how he's always grieved, but finally having a full body breakdown in Style's embrace after they both know everything and Style continued to, and will always, choose him anyway, is just. It's so very dear to me.

It showed how perfect Style is for him because he wasn't overly emotional in that moment because it wasn't about him. He came to find Fadel and then made him and his feelings his sole focus. If Style had started to cry or show upset, Fadel would have focused on that since he feels like he has to always fix things and constantly be strong. But what Fadel needed in that moment was to just be allowed to feel everything he's tried not feel, wouldn't let himself feel, was told he couldn't feel, and Style gave him that. That is also very dear to me.

Fadel broke down in Style's arms and lap and with that, Style truly became his first and only 100%. They both deserve this love so much.

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Style slightly getting the ick when Fadel is nice to him in the beginning vs being So into being held captive at gun point at the end. You are so dear to me you strange little mechanic.

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Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl (2003) IMDb Trivia

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girl thought she was doing good next thing she knew therapist added more sessions