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So I got called into jury duty…

I tried really hard to get out of it, but none of my excuses were good enough when I emailed. This was a federal case, so my aunt had to drive me to Trenton to plead for my freedom. After waiting around, we god herded into a courtroom, and the judge told us that the case was gonna be a long one. They began to call names to sit in the jury seats, and one by one, they confirmed their availability. I was put in the seat instantly upon the first persons dismissal. I raised my hand, and said, “your honor, I can’t be a juror on a two week trial, I have opera rehearsal.” The room was quiet. I think someone laughed. I had to explain how I would get fired if I didn’t go, and that I would lose money–this kind of freelance job doesn’t abide by the jury rules. And she looked at me, and said, “opera huh, well, sing something for us.”

People ask me to sing all the time. It was about 10:30 AM in goddamn Trenton, and I was wearing sweatpants. I really just wanted to go home, because I had to memorize about 20 more pages of Italian for my opera.

So I did. In a federal court of law, in front of the judge, all the jury pool, the lawyers and the fucking DEFENDANT, I sang o mio babbino caro. It was the only song I could think of, and it has a bunch of high notes in it and people eat that shit up. 

And the judge fucking excused me. The skeezy NJ defense attorney said “Bravissimo,” which is the wrong ending for a woman, but I’ll accept the praise.

My aunt fell asleep in the bathroom in jury holding, so I collected her, and we left Trenton, and left the courtroom behind, although I’m almost certain the court steno was typing the whole time.

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WAIT A MINUTE

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Hi babies. Remember to be cold af to fuckboys always ✨

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Cher being interviewed in the 90′s

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Easy Vegan Lemon Muffins with Poppy Seeds

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queen goddess icon love of my life

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Da’Vonne Once Said….

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Y'all remember when Tamar won CBBUS2 in a black final 2 with an all POC/female Final 5 and all the white men were evicted back to back to back in the first weeks?

Grodner will never let us have that again.

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I thought I would watch Da and Bay’s conversation, drink a lil bit of wine and go to bed but nope I’m falling asleep in front of my computer tonight because the feeds are TOO good.

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I really wanted Janelle, Kaysar, Da and Bayleigh to stay together but damn this drama is killing that dream.

And to be frank I feel like all four of them are right in this situation. It’s fucked.

bayleigh: and no shade, but the last time an african-american male has made it to jury is when he was in a showmance with a white woman.

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Obsessed with these two

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“And as a child I’ve been bullied for being darkskinned, so much to a point where I wanted to be lighter. And it took me a while to really embrace it. But when I did, I was able to stand in all this chocolate, unapologetically.” 

- Da’Vonne to Bayleigh & Kevin

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Mucho confinamiento en casa veo aquí

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when you wear a sundress and one of the straps is loose so it slips off your shoulder and u feel… how shall i put this… harlotrous

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the best way i can think to describe the experience of reading moby dick is you’re in line at the dmv and this guy behind you very loudly says “well who HASN’T had a gay experience” and then proceeds to tell you every detail about his life in between anecdotes about how great sperm is and how ropes work and sometimes he’ll say the most poetic shit you’ve ever heard in your life and them jump RIGHT back into explaining how a whale is a fish because 1) it swims in water and you’re still only like halfway through the dmv line

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“...and that is why you should never partake in paying federal income taxes. Hey! You’ll ruin your nails!”

Birds of Prey (2020) dir. Cathy Yan