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Thom summoned.

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I have a friend who loves randy and I torment them with pictures of randy plushies being tortured. do you have any randy facts I could torment them with too?

I'm in a jovial mood, so sure, here's a few nuggets of Randy lore in increasing order of significance. you are going to know Randy now.

Randy's leg twitches constantly when he sits. Randy thrashes in his sleep.

Randy has his nails bitten down to nubs. Randy constantly struggles to do things like use sellotape because he has no fingernails to grip stuff with.

Randy has had juggling lessons from three different gurus and yet, cannot juggle. None of the gurus would give Randy a certificate as he was not able to successfully juggle with more than 2 pins for more than 3 seconds and not drop the pins because of the wounds under his handages stinging him as he gripped the pins. Randy would definitely do better at juggling without cuts all over his palms and fingers, but his coordination is still pretty awful.

Because Randy has a slightly better job as of the end of his route (and a home, yay), Randy has a teensy amount of disposable income. One thing that drains this sliver of income is Randy's tendency to enter a store, browse, see nothing he actually wants to buy and then still buying something small that he doesn't even want because he is terrified of the 1/1000 chance that security will think he's shoplifting if he walks out without buying anything, and he does not like the idea of a potential confrontation occurring, even if nothing would actually happen as Randy didn't shoplift anything and upon emptying his pockets, he'd be good to go. THAT. Every time Randy enters a store, he thinks of that and every time, he buys a root beer that he doesn't want. Randy is still learning.

Randy paces around when he's alone and talks to himself to 'rehearse' difficult conversations he has to have and rehearse his talking points. he practices difficult conversations for HOURS, his script's down to a TEE. then, when he enters the conversation, as soon as Randy says the first thing he rehearsed, the person usually inevitably gives a response he didn't anticipate, causing him to immediately abandon his plan and begin internally panicking.

Randy has had a nasty habit of hitting his head in frustration for most of his life. Naturally, he should never do this now, since his head is literally on the verge of exploding bc it's overstuffed and the lid's barely closed. Now, he still occasionally hits his temple without thinking when he's frustrated with himself, which causes him to then instinctively shriek and clutch his head. For a SPLIT second, wild panic. Every time, he thinks "yep, this is it, my head's gonna burst" and it doesn't, miraculously.

Of all of the datables, Randy has the greatest potential for personal change, imo.

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i do not care if bedroom fairy lights are forever perceived as a twee millennial thing i can never go back. any light that is not striving to approximate the soft glow of candlelight does not belong in my bedroom

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posting this before i look at it for too long and hate it

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famous prophets

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me: “sorry ): can’t come!! got so much to do at home”

me as soon as im home:

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who up needing they something soon rn

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i was in full bloom until i met you

i'm gonna shake my fetters, i'm breaking loose

no weird comments. please and thank you

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a little thing i made for one of my favorite songs off the album twin fantasy, beach life-in-death!!!!!

dw its supposed to look incredibly low quality

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A mindful notification I received this morning from Catherine Shannon’s substack

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Me when something soon

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randings

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I love these freaks !!1!!1!!