ohsimpleplant

[ohsimpleplant]

I just found the earliest email I ever sent from my email address, and it’s the funniest goddamn thing I can possibly imagine a fourth grader sending her teacher:

(Context - my fourth grade teacher was on maternity leave, and the state of the classroom fish tank was dire under the substitute teacher’s tyrannical rule. The class convened at recess, and decided to inform our (24yo, new mother) former teacher of the situation. I was selected as the duly appointed representative for this solemn communication.)

[ohsimpleplant]

now that iwtv has hit a new audience from netflix i figured now was a good a time as any for another round of favorite tweets of the week

[ohsimpleplant]

Earlier today I made a remark that wasn’t necessary

[ohsimpleplant]

Anyone else imagine their ocs as actors and when you decide to change something about them, the clouds open: a script change from God, “You are now bisexual.”

[ohsimpleplant]

i’m in tears over this holy shit

[ohsimpleplant]

I always find this part of their relationship hilarious

[ohsimpleplant]

the Thing about how i met your mother is yes it was just a 2000s sitcom. yes the jokes were often problematic. yes it didn’t necessarily age well.

but it also had Motifs and Themes and Symbolism and Big Ideas about love, grief, and friendship. it said that love is on its way and it’s getting here as fast as it can. it said all you can do is promise to love someone with everything you have for as long as you have it. it said love is the best thing we do. it said if you have to think about it, they are not your lifelong treasure of destiny, but that person is so close. it said everything that has ever happened happened so that two people could meet. it said that if you are holding on tightly to something you might not even want it anymore. it said listen to the universe and take the leap. it said be vulnerable and return to someone’s door to drunkenly confess your feelings one more time. it said be honest about what you need and never be ashamed of it. it said grief is excruciating and you’ll never be ready for it. it said you gotta wait for the real thing even if it gets tough out there and it does. it said time and time again that everything bad becomes so worth it when you see who it leads you to be. it said the universe hasn’t forgotten about you. it said what matters is loving those around you well. it said chase down your future because you never know when you might lose it and you’ll wish you’d had those extra 45 days. it said without love we might as well all pack it in because what’s the point otherwise. it said at the end of the day what matters is who you grow old with and that is always first and foremost your friends

[ohsimpleplant]

extremely fucked up that the only way out is through

[ohsimpleplant]

[ohsimpleplant]

Percy with a cap that says women and men want me, fish respect me

[ohsimpleplant]

just saw a single piece of paper drift past 50 feet in the air over buildings like a beautiful white bird

[ohsimpleplant]

has anybody seen my pet piece of paper. his name is walter he is very fragile but very adventurous. i should never have left the window open in my tenth story apartment

[ohsimpleplant]

Me when I say “just two inches off the top” and they actually do it

[ohsimpleplant]

[ohsimpleplant]