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[ohaileigh]

Things I Did In 2016

Took a nap on my living room floor on January 1st and woke up to a walk off

Ate a $100 donut covered in gold

Created a realistic timeline and game plan to finally move to LA

Had an embarrassing screaming/crying fight in front Soho House

Starred in my first video ad for MNSTR

Started working at the desk at MNSTR to help out and for free classes!

Published my first piece of serious personal writing about coming to terms with your relationship and your career not defining who you are as a person with a media brand I really respect, Mask Magazine

Got an X-Files tattoo

Raised money for AIDS awareness by cycling, organizing a party, and DJing…aka all I ever do

Got really good at riding a hoverboard

Threw a Kanye West theme party with a Möet sponsorship

Immersed myself in work and workouts to deal/not deal with missing someone a lot as a distraction from the physical distance and blatant growing emotional distance

Learned how to wrestle at NYWC and interviewed trainers and wrestlers for [redacted media company] to put on their new channel [redacted] and never heard back from them regarding the footage…

Became a hair model for Bumble & Bumble

Parted ways with the job I took after leaving the job that started my career

Went to dinner with my BFF/cycle boss who asked me “have you ever thought about becoming an instructor?”

Decided not to move to LA due to new career opportunity

Went to Wrestlemania

Interviewed BABYMETAL on a Twitch livestream

Went to Montreal with a bunch of my friends, most of whom work for Red Bull, all of whom are certifiably insane

Started boxing and got addicted

DJ’d at the Ace Hotel in NY and LA

Slept with someone I had been interested in the moment I met them 4 years ago and instantly realized how not interested I had become

Got an emoji tattoo because my BFF/boss literally made me do it

Manifested a Prince impersonator the night Prince died when I dropped Little Red Corvette at Elvis Guesthouse

Had to say goodbye to my roommate, Arnold, who I grew really close to, because he moved back home to LA before moving to Berlin. RIP original cast of Donk Mansion.

Began teaching at MNSTR Cycle and kicked off my first class with tons of friends, and kept a Slipknot video in there successfully

Cocktail waitressed for the first time in my life. Got fired a month later for not giving a shit. Big surprise.

Went to a pool party at one of my favorite judges from RuPaul’s Drag Race NJ house with M & D, squished in their 2-seater car 2 hours away to hang out with a bunch of beefcake gay guys who were in shock and awe at our “alt-ness”

Dyed my hair pink while drunk with my roommates

Met David Duchovny and somehow forgot how to say anything witty or clever which is all I have in this life

Went to EDC in Vegas after driving alone and losing my mind somewhere in the desert on the way. Would not recommend.

DJ’d the NYC Health Department float in the NYC Pride Parade

Got to teach a weekend of classes dressed up as Harley Quinn for a Suicide Squad themed ride with my BFF/boss

DJ’d the Sailor Moon Day Party for the 2nd year in a row

Started Soft Leather NYC with the help of Johnny, which is still going on strong!

Spent most of my summer with one of my best friends Lina, who moved out of NYC, and think I’ve successfully convinced her to return

Received a dick pic shot in Pokemon Go

Got to see both my best friends Diane and Erin in NYC even for a short amount of time

The revival of our *cough*ORIGINAL*cough* Emo Night in the LES, big shout out to Brik for holding us down at Leftfield

Experienced yet another disappointment from a budding relationship and came to the realization that I truly do have no desire to be with anyone right now

DJ’d Soft Leather in LA to one of the most fun crowds I have ever seen

Helped open MNSTR’s second location at the legendary Limelight building

Met Biblegirl at my BFF’s birthday brunch, discovered my fucking spirit animal

Got to teach my first ever METAL MONDAY ride on my 26th birthday

Went back to platinum blonde. where I belong

Threw a joint birthday party with Lina featuring the best party flyer I’ve ever made and our amazing friends (big thank you to Marie for the Snap filter and Rob and Logan for DJing—numetal DJ set was definitely one of the best parts of this year!)

Celebrated the release of Jess’ literally perfect album After Hours on a party bus that drove around Brooklyn (go buy it, Jubilee #1!!)

Learned the entire choreography to Fade by Kanye West but really, by Teyana Taylor, with my BFF Sarah

Got to teach a class based on high school/Hot Topic called Mall Goth, and my Warped Tour ’04 (emo and pop punk) ride became my highest rated class so far—go emo kids go!

Taught a class in a PVC leotard and covered in fake blood based on the opening scene of Blade

Dressed up as Lady Gaga from the 2009 VMA performance of Paparazzi—basically the least clothing I have ever worn in public, and honestly felt great about it/myself, which for any female in her 20’s is basically finding nirvana

Went to the Boiler Room Weekender with all of my favorite people in Pennsylvania, USA, one of my least favorite states!

Met good dogs

Auditioned for a role in an Adidas commercial—didn’t get it, but felt good to be called in and try it out

Taught other babes how to DJ at Intersessions in NYC while several of my amazing, hardworking girlfriends organized the programming and events in other cities, and met a lot of great women

Put a hammer in Dewine’s bedroom wall

Was contacted by Nike to be shot for their spring video lookbook campaign—also never heard back, but incredibly grateful that someone scouted me without my knowledge and that they came in to see me and the studio

Filmed a video with Vice about the actual workout of cycling and how it relates to me DJing

Finished 4 weeks of a sparring class at my boxing club-full contact, and by week 3 all the girls stopped showing up so I had to fight the boys. Me? Fighting boys? Imagine.

Took my BFF Sarah to her first wrestling show ever. It’s a fucking spectacle and is honestly so great to see someone experience this for the first time.

Decided to stop sleeping with people I am already friends with and tried dating strangers, already sick of it

Decided after a tumultuous year of career changes and accruing debt tacked on to the outstanding cost of my early career (intern life and supporting another person on my credit line) that I could build up my savings account again while still tackling the immense burden that I had previously let hang over my head and discourage me.

Booked trips to see my best friends in Texas and LA after not taking time off work since the opening of our new studio

Realized I’ve been creating graphic assets for brands, as well as myself, for the past year and a half and I have no portfolio assembled. I’m making a portfolio. Hire me to do graphic design because I actually really fucking like it.

Wrote this list while procrastinating some graphic design work. Oops.

[ohaileigh]

on the delivery of disaster.

Bad news can come at any time. Some people think there are levels in terms of ways to find out about something that will upset them, as if finding out in a specific way through a specific channel from a specific person can affect the outcome of the situation. I used to feel that way.

Today I found out that my grandmother passed away because of a Facebook post.

The ways in which we use social media as a form of communication and a platform of expression all point to this as being something that is more and more commonplace, regardless of whether or not most of us find it acceptable. This morning, I found out a friend of mine lost her childhood best friend via a Facebook post that was more of a memorial appreciation, and while I was sad to see it, that type of sentiment was not shocking to me and I felt it was completely appropriate.

Deducing that my grandmother had passed via a single photo that one of my aunts posted with half English and half Tagalog comments on it felt like it fell into the category of not appropriate at all---not because it affected me more, but because the immediate need to post SOMETHING before everyone in the family knew just seems wrong. I don’t know if it’s the cultural divide--many of my maternal relatives still live in the Philippines--or the age divide, but what I felt when I saw that post was mostly confused and somewhat infuriated that it said a lot without saying anything I could really understand.

Shortly after, I found out my mother was waiting until tomorrow to tell me because she knew I was at work. She isn’t going home for the funeral. Part of me feels heartbroken for her, because no matter how expensive and impractical a 23 hour flight across the world is, I can’t imagine not doing that if the situation involved the next generation. The other part of me is in awe of how anyone can make rational decisions while dealing with loss. 

My parents are the only family I have that I am close to, but they both come from larger families--my father being the oldest of four, and my mother being the second youngest of seven. They have both lost at least one parent, and are both generally matter-of-fact about everything, often telling me as an angsty teen to stop feeling sorry for myself. While most older adults run wild with horrible internet etiquette on any network they get their hands on, they can also carry poise and strength in real life. Bad things happen every day, and while I don’t believe we get to choose how sad and how long we are sad about things, the outcome is still the same regardless of how you discovered it and not dwelling on that makes it more of a reality that needs to be faced sooner rather than later.

I wish I could say I felt at peace with that knowledge, but it’s easy to say one thing and then feel another. I wish I had known how serious the situation was so I could have said goodbye, even if it was over the phone millions of miles away. I feel guilt for telling my mother I didn’t want to hear her say clinical and factual things about her mother’s hospital care, because I didn’t want her to be the nurse, I wanted her to be my mom. I wish I got to spend more time with the woman who would only refer to me as “beautiful girl” aside from a couple of weeks as a baby and as a 10-year old, and I wish I knew more about her than just that she always asked about my studies on the phone during the few times a year I spoke to her.

A few months ago, I went through a breakup with a person that I had already experienced losing three times previously over the course of three years. Though the final separation was somewhat mutual, it didn’t make it less painful than the other times, at least not at first. Drifting apart still hurts just as badly as an abrupt decision to leave, except it’s a slow and dull pain, until it’s not. You can be “friends” and talk about your lives and it can be therapeutic in some way, you can delete each other from everything and still find ways to pore over every interaction, every reference, and make assumptions and deductions about what they’re doing now without you: the end result is still the same if you’re not truly at peace with what you will hear or find.

I don’t know what to say anymore, or who to say it to, because the main thing I am taking away from this is that no matter what you do or say, at the end of it all, it still won’t be enough. No matter how soft or how sharp the blow is, the realization of something sad is still sad either way.

[ohaileigh]

i forgot about this thing

oops

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How young is too young?

oh

[ohaileigh]

LA BAE - ME N BRITTNEY SCOTT DJING AT MISHKA LA

[ohaileigh]

happy nu year stay based

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~(*.*)~

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forgot how tite this cd is thankfully i was too dumb to figure out how to work bluetooth audio and had to listen to this on repeat when driving amber's car

[ohaileigh]

i am dj 2nite*~

[ohaileigh]

wot color r ur panties

SAME

[ohaileigh]

Hii.where u from pm

PIN DROP: THE TRAP

[ohaileigh]

lol

same

[ohaileigh]

Мишка x Dinosaur Jr. Capsule: Launching online soon, available in our Brooklyn storefront for purchase.

Bugs on my head but don't call me a bughead.

[ohaileigh]

STUDS & SKULLS

by Primp & Polish

[ohaileigh]

Мишка x Long Clothing "Vex" Oversize Shirt

grim.

[ohaileigh]

SOBBING. FINALLY.

[ohaileigh]

wear your @mishkagram @troubleandbass snapz tonight at Sullivan Hall/Room! Congrats on the big 777 to our Brooklyn family 😘 #TROUBLE7BASS