ofpowerwarrior

[ofpowerwarrior]

Jo’s thing was she had a home, a person that was comfort, safety for her. For years Jo brought that warm sensation she felt in her stomach. How when she wasn’t around Alex she wanted to be. And she easily fell in love with him; and we mapped out a future; we were solid when he suddenly disappeared and left on her. We had talked about starting a family; it turns out I wasn’t the family he wanted. It stung like hell, Jo felt sick, she cried a lot. She felt wobbly on her feet, any ounce of food she smelt she ended up vomiting up. And Now it made sense, it wasn’t because of depression of being left behind. It wasn’t sadness, it was because the last thing Alex before he left me for a new life with a woman who never deserved him, he got me pregnant. And Jo felt joy, because she knew how deeply she loved him, and a memory of him was enough. She felt sad, and upset all the time. But she also felt grateful to be a mom. Our paths didn’t line up; and it was okay. But Jo didn’t want to be the gossip mill, she didn’t want to be stared at, the whispers that Karev left because of her. Jo needed an escape until the baby came, and she trusted Arizona, she trusted she’d be taken care the health of her unborn child, her own health. Which as crazy as it sounds Jo jumped at the chance to go to New York away from prying eyes. 

It was a comfort that stopped her nerves. Jo was nervous about being in a place that was unfamiliar to her. But seeing Arizona, she felt a wave of relief. Because she was a friendly face, someone she felt comfortable with. All that to say; she just felt awful that knot in her stomach because Alex was her boy, the guy she trained to take over her unit at the hospital, he disappointed me but I could only imagine how the blonde was feeling now. So out of habit I owned up to feeling awful now, it was probably the cloudy emotions whipping through my system right now. A soft smile slowly came to my lips as my eyes met hers. “ I’m excited to see her too.” Purposely avoiding the mention of my ex husband now. I didn’t want to cry in an airport, because despite it all I know how much Alex loved me, and I loved him he made me believe I was worthy of love, our paths just didn’t work. 

Jo was grasping at straws. Was she fine? Was she okay? No she was a hot mess who couldn’t even indulge in a glass of wine for her pain anymore. She had to stick to cravings food, it as kinda depressing if you asked her. But Jo was strong she’s gonna rise so high to where Alex would feel like a fool for ever leaving her. And Yeah I didn’t want to stand here pretend I was happy, but I also couldn’t deny a part of me hoped Alex may show up, he may be the guy I assumed he was. I didn’t tell him to feel guilty, I just couldn’t sit and be Izzie who kept him in the dark for years. I wasn't cynical like that, I had heart, and I cared about his happiness. “ A part of me wished I couldn’t be the bitch and didn’t tell him.. But I couldn’t be her..” Izzie, the pain in my ass; who took Alex from me, but it was also on him because instead of being an honest man he left, tossed papers on me on his way and was done. Alex was a grown man who made his own decisions. And that was the sad truth. 

A part of Jo wanted Arizona to be right. Give it time, years, but Jo didn’t want Alex to want her based upon our child. He was all talk and no action. Actions spoke louder for Jo; if that made sense. All that to say she got comfortable in the seat, her head comfortably leaned against the window as she took in the road to the city, a new place of home. “ Someday.” Someday we’d talke figure us out for our baby, but Jo didn’t trust him, and right now that’s all she could believe. At the mention of pizza, oh did that sound delicious. “ Thank you for taking me in, I promise I will find my own place I don’t want to burden you or your family.” Gracious is what Jo was; she appreciated the effort shown, but if New York was the move; she’d stable herself in a long run.

Someone to Lean on

@anunstablepast

Changes; for Jo it was normal to move from place to place. To form a new version of yourself. She had renamed herself; she had run from situations that felt haunting. A change of pace; a new place to settle down in felt normal. Jo never saw herself leaving Seattle; she never thought she’d have to. That was until her husband left her for an ex wife and a family he apparently always wanted. And Jo found herself pregnant and alone. She had Link who was her best friend; he’s been an angle in the last month. He’s ensured she ate, and took her to the few doctor appointments she had to go to. Especially if this move was to go as planned. Arizona had requested her scans; requested a last appointment with Carina before she board her flight. It was discrete, it was a need to know basis. Only a select few knew about the brunette’s condition. Jo didn’t want to be the talk of the hospital.

It took weeks for the whispers to stop. For the stares to stop after Alex left. After he abandoned her. Jo wanted to be okay; wanted to be happy. After a month of knowing; of starting to take care of herself she was adjusting. Carina promised not to tell; and Bailey understood her choice to leave town. Meredith was in the dark; she had manage to hide a pregnancy, she managed to still low until after she gave birth. That’s what she wanted; a place where she wasn’t the girl who got left. She wasn’t the girl with a crazy ex, Jo hated being spied on; being the talk of the hospital. The stars had lined up to where she was able to leave; go under the grid, with Bailey’s support; and having a place to stay with Arizona and Callie. She was lucky; to have a way out. It took a month given how awful her morning sickness had been. Jo had finally packed; the necessary items she needed; she was a light backer. Only a suitcase; and a carry on. She might be crazy; but the way the female looked at it was.. Her body was growing; she’s gonna be growing out of her cloths in a few months; and if she forgot anything that was required; she could pick it up in New York. 

She decided not to drive herself crazy; the hardest part was saying goodbye to Link. After much pleading; her friend understood why she needed to go for herself. It wasn’t about running; because Jo knew her home was Seattle; but in order for her to have her baby on her terms; she had to escape. Alex did a number on her; he ghosted her until he felt remorse; felt the need to own up to his mistakes. Jo wasn’t intending on sharing this news with him. But he reached out a few weeks ago; and he apologized; and one heat of the moment text ended with her uttering the words. In a single text; her good heart now had her attempting at a co-parenting arrangement with him; even if it hurt her. 

She was expected to inform him she landed when her plane landed in New York. Although the jury was out on that one. She was brought out of her thoughts when she heard the intercom; the announcement that the plane was landing. Fingers gripped hold of the armrest as she felt the right landing; luckily her stomach was playing nice with her today. Within minutes people were getting up. Jo was only about 3 months so she wasn’t showing yet; and decided to take the time to shoot the blonde a quick text. 

[ Text] Arizona. 

“ Just wanted to let you know I landed okay.” 

With a quick press of a send the brunette slowly lifted herself up to her feet. Lines of people exiting; she’d patiently wait. Jo wasn’t expecting Arizona to get her; she had an uber app set in, in case she had to call for a car. One problem at a time.

[ofpowerwarrior]

Jo learned to not trust. She didn’t come to Settle to fall in love. She didn’t want to Seattle to let an idiot of a man in. She came for her passions, for her career. And Seattle was skillful for her; she stood to her guns. She wasn’t a girl to be toyed with. She wasn’t going to bend over backwards to sleep around to get surgeons. She had her own morals on her shoulders. And Alex he was a man whore when she met him; trading surgeries for sex, sleeping with her class, and she meant it when she said the words she had absolutely no interest in him. But we had bonded and formed a friendship that truly meant the world to Jo, being able to be herself, and lean into him. 

Years of love, of devotion meant nothing to Alex. He was full of talk; the promises of I’m not going anywhere except home with you. I promise to love you forever, I never wanted to be away from you, the list goes on and on, A list of betrays, of the lies that kept Jo up at night. She was hurt, sad, the list goes on. But she wished it would be easier to hate him, easier to despise him. But she underneath she understood why he left. He had kids with his ex, with her the dry taste in her mouth now. And Alex never wanted to be his dad; the man that abandoned kids, that causes more hurt and love. And I knew Alex, but it didn’t make the pain of him choosing her over us hurt any less. I was miserable without him, I was corny but I missed him. I shouldn’t I should never want to speak to him again. But it changed when I found out I was holding his baby; when we had a child of our own. 

Jo was numb had no idea what to do, this wasn’t her plan to be pregnant with a man who obviously didn’t love her enough to stay. Jo spoke to him because she didn’t want to be Izzie that kept a child from him for years; she had morals, and she had love for him. Even if it stung now. She spent days figuring out her move until Arizona let her come to the city; to visit to stay until the baby came, and Alex I didn’t want to keep him in the dark. I wanted him to know, but also be aware this situation was more about our child than us. 

It was hard, on her shoulders. Relaxed upon the couch on Arizona’s place, she sighed as she went to take a read at his message, he was a smooth talker but he also set up the betrayal in my own mind. And I felt a huff leave my lips as I replied. [ Text] Alex . 

“ You sure have a way of showing it Karev. You love me but wasted no time in leaving, and yeah I understand it’s because you had kids with her. She never deserved you and you’re still a whim for her. How is that supposed to make me feel ? I would have supported you in everything, but you never gave me a choice but this damn letter. I’ll send you the address you can be there but that’s all. I’m not as bitchy as the ex now am I? Trust me i wasn’t going to, as for you, you obviously found the place you belong..” She sent with ease; not feeling guilty in the slightest for once. He had it coming. 

Anger boiling inside of her as she followed up with sending the address of the clinic, she wanted him here, even with her petty attitude, she was mad and hurt; it all felt justified now.

Starting Again

@ImpudentMedico 

Complicated was the word when it came to Alex and herself. From barely speaking; from the rage of hate she felt for him. To the common goal; which was to raise a healthy child. To push aside our distaste for each other; well more so on my part. Jo knew she could’ve had it easy by not engaging by avoiding Alex especially when they first messaged after a month of him being gone. She could’ve gotten through the pregnancy on her own. She was built for it; to be alone. But one confession; one text changed the relationship she had with him. 

He was the dad; and as angry as she was with him; She didn’t want to be like Izzie; she didn’t want to keep a child from him. She still loved him; she wanted him to be apart of their child’s life even if it made her sick to see the pair had ended up. All that to say it wasn’t smooth sailing; but Jo had promised to keep him updated. To let him be there for her and their child. 

A promise she intended to keep. And that’s why Jo found herself digging into her purse when she stepped foot into the New York airport.  Stepping to the side as she listened to people chat, she found her phone letting fingers dance along the keys. 

[ Text} Alex. 

“ I debated telling you, but a promise is a promise. I’m in New York. I’ll be staying with Callie and Arizona so you know I’ll be safe.”  Not wanting to keep talking; Jo came to the city to move on from the last chapter not be dragged back into the old. But Jo also knew they had to figure out the next steps together. One text at a time. Because let’s be honest he left once; why wouldn’t Alex do it again? It was a fear; the reason why Jo was keeping him at arms length. Protecting herself. 

Slipping her phone into her coat pocket she slung her carry on over her shoulder and began to walk to the baggage claim; the signs directing her. A new Chapter; exhaling deeply Jo assured herself this was the right move for her.

[ofpowerwarrior]

Jo didn’t want to hold remorse. She didn’t want to hold the anger inside of her. She wanted to feel the joy, the happiness of where she was. Yes she was isolating herself’ she was holding herself accountable for the life she was paving out. Seattle was home, but she wanted to be hidden. She didn’t want the prying eyes; she didn’t want the whispers which is what led her to New York. To people she trusted with her care. Because the reality scared her; holding a baby inside of her; being alone it felt out she was now coming out of her comfort zone. 

Jo didn’t want to feel like she was under a microscope. And in Seattle it felt like her every move was being magnified. The whispers of how she was doing, the noise that followed Alex leaving, she was hurting and New York felt safe; and Arizona felt like a safe heaven. She wanted to be her doctor; to ensure her baby got to safety a healthy delivery. And Jo felt relieved especially once she landed, the airport was busy like no demand, but she had felt comfort in a familiar face. And now as she led her bags towards the exit; she felt a comfort smile form on the corners of her face. 

A craving; now when it came to the hums of her stomach Jo knew she was all over the place. She was living off pickles, and peanut butter. Jo would find herself eating a container of pickles and she craved anything that dipped into peanut butter. Jo wasn’t one to let her guards down, but seeing as she was trusting Arizona, the blonde who not only went through this phase once but twice, she felt a comfort level with her. “ Thank you for wanting to be here for me. I once believed you only liked me because of Alex. As for Callie she was once my mentor, and I adore her to no limits. I’m sorry if any cravings I have put you and your family into an opposition.” That was the last thing Jo wanted, she was happy for the room and broad, but she also couldn’t handle of feeling as if she was burden, and no coffee it was a struggle in its own. 

Jo had pushed him from the far front of her mind. Because it stung, it hurt to keep reliving that day. The day where she uttered the words he left; where he left her a damn letter explaining and it hurt. He loved her but where he belonged was in Kansas with Izzie and their kids. And now Jo only told him because she didn’t want to pull an iZzie, she didn’t want to be another girl who left him in the dark. But as she sat in her seat; the buckle pulled over her frame she swallowed the lump that formed. Not even being able to look the blonde in the eye. It hurt; it stung we were even in contact only because of our child. A child that felt unexpected for me and him now. “ Thank you, I appreciate it Arizona. I always worried that i was a rebond, for him. And he made promises he couldn’t keep. He could’ve stayed we could’ve made it work but he’d a dumbass. And yes I told him. I couldn’t be Izzie that keeps kids from him for years..” I couldn’t even if the thought did cross my mind briefly. 

Jo didn’t want to give into the details but she had hoped her favorite people had found a way to make it work. ANd hearing that good news left her breathless, and she smiled for real. Callie and Arizona; breakups and all had managed to make it work. And she grinned. “ I’m happy to hear it.” A mumble on her end. Jo had felt her body relax against the seat when she felt the blonde her comments on Amelia, and she nodded along. “ Yeah.. it’s completed. At least I know who my baby daddy is..” An obvious it was Alex even if I wished it never happened; but i loved Alex I couldn’t hate him not even now.

Someone to Lean on

@anunstablepast

Changes; for Jo it was normal to move from place to place. To form a new version of yourself. She had renamed herself; she had run from situations that felt haunting. A change of pace; a new place to settle down in felt normal. Jo never saw herself leaving Seattle; she never thought she’d have to. That was until her husband left her for an ex wife and a family he apparently always wanted. And Jo found herself pregnant and alone. She had Link who was her best friend; he’s been an angle in the last month. He’s ensured she ate, and took her to the few doctor appointments she had to go to. Especially if this move was to go as planned. Arizona had requested her scans; requested a last appointment with Carina before she board her flight. It was discrete, it was a need to know basis. Only a select few knew about the brunette’s condition. Jo didn’t want to be the talk of the hospital.

It took weeks for the whispers to stop. For the stares to stop after Alex left. After he abandoned her. Jo wanted to be okay; wanted to be happy. After a month of knowing; of starting to take care of herself she was adjusting. Carina promised not to tell; and Bailey understood her choice to leave town. Meredith was in the dark; she had manage to hide a pregnancy, she managed to still low until after she gave birth. That’s what she wanted; a place where she wasn’t the girl who got left. She wasn’t the girl with a crazy ex, Jo hated being spied on; being the talk of the hospital. The stars had lined up to where she was able to leave; go under the grid, with Bailey’s support; and having a place to stay with Arizona and Callie. She was lucky; to have a way out. It took a month given how awful her morning sickness had been. Jo had finally packed; the necessary items she needed; she was a light backer. Only a suitcase; and a carry on. She might be crazy; but the way the female looked at it was.. Her body was growing; she’s gonna be growing out of her cloths in a few months; and if she forgot anything that was required; she could pick it up in New York. 

She decided not to drive herself crazy; the hardest part was saying goodbye to Link. After much pleading; her friend understood why she needed to go for herself. It wasn’t about running; because Jo knew her home was Seattle; but in order for her to have her baby on her terms; she had to escape. Alex did a number on her; he ghosted her until he felt remorse; felt the need to own up to his mistakes. Jo wasn’t intending on sharing this news with him. But he reached out a few weeks ago; and he apologized; and one heat of the moment text ended with her uttering the words. In a single text; her good heart now had her attempting at a co-parenting arrangement with him; even if it hurt her. 

She was expected to inform him she landed when her plane landed in New York. Although the jury was out on that one. She was brought out of her thoughts when she heard the intercom; the announcement that the plane was landing. Fingers gripped hold of the armrest as she felt the right landing; luckily her stomach was playing nice with her today. Within minutes people were getting up. Jo was only about 3 months so she wasn’t showing yet; and decided to take the time to shoot the blonde a quick text. 

[ Text] Arizona. 

“ Just wanted to let you know I landed okay.” 

With a quick press of a send the brunette slowly lifted herself up to her feet. Lines of people exiting; she’d patiently wait. Jo wasn’t expecting Arizona to get her; she had an uber app set in, in case she had to call for a car. One problem at a time.

[ofpowerwarrior]

Jo Wilson had lived the life of abandonment, lived on the streets. Had to fend for herself growing up, all she craved was to feel loved, to be worthy of someone to stay. Jo had never depended on anyone but herself; that was until Alex; the man who when she first met him was a manwhore; he slept with her whole intern class. If you had a vagina; he’d be the one to be smitten with you. Jo didn’t want to be yet another girl he slept with she had her defenses up. She resisted his charm. But through her intern year he wasn’t the same guy she made assumptions about. Alex had become a friend; someone who taught her; believed in the kind of surgeon she wanted to be. 

With time she fell completely in love with Alex Karev. Jo was wary at first; hastite to dive right in. Because each time she allowed her guard to lower; each time she allowed herself to feel vulnerable. She was the one left crumbling. Alex made promises “ I’m not going anywhere except home with you.” The words I love you hung in her mind. Flashes of our wedding; twice, one on the boat, the waves crashing around us; and the other in the courthouse; Jo remembered feeling so loved, she felt those butterflies each time his lips brushed against her own. And now she felt numb each time she thought of him. Each time she read his messages; mind you the only reason Jo found herself speaking two words to Alex was due to the baby; our baby that was curved out of love, because before my world came crashing down, I assumed, I trusted him to his word. I always felt safe with him; he was my forever and now I felt numb. I felt my chest pounding because I didn’t trust Alex anymore. He left me, he left us for what? A woman who had his kids and kept them secret for not only one month but 5 years. He chose a love that abandoned him apposed to the unconditional love I always had given him supported him. I didn’t want to be Izzie, I didn’t want him to feel that kind of betrayal again, to feel like he missed out; on our child, on the love I knew he’d give he or her. Hand on my stomach as fingers slowly brushed the small bump. Sofia had her head rested near my shoulder as I glanced at the kitchen where Arizona was setting up the dining table; and Callie was fishing out the dinner. And she made sure to kiss the blonde and I smiled to myself. It was sweet to witness a love that came back; when it felt broken once. 

Jo waited until after dinner to respond to the male; she didn’t want to feel the heat in her body; or for Arizona to bare witness to the fire blaring behind her eyes; because the blonde wasn’t a fan of Karev, dinner was nice; I felt supported a little less alone. Jo had found herself in the guest room, changed into sweats and a sweatshirt; his sweatshirt; it was more comfortable than her own clothing. Not because it didn’t smell of him, a tear prickled at the corner of her eye as he finally let her fingers dance at the keys to answer. 

[ Alex} 

“ I’m a responsibility great to know Alex. I don’t need you to take care of me Alex. You never truly cared about you, the changed man you became until it was convent for her. You don’t love her yet you left us, Be honest with yourself she and your other kids were more important than trying to figure this to make it work out. I’m not a charity case, I will never prevent you from being a part of our child’s life, but how? How does this work? I won’t be moving to Kansas I hope you know that. You can’t play part time dad. It’s at Arizona’s clinic.”

I said my peace, but I did wonder how does it work? Alex left me for his kids; and now I was carrying his kid, it felt messy. Placing my phone down after I sent the address in another message, the brunette laid her head down against the fluffy pillows and allowed herself to feel calmness and try to rest.

Starting Again

@ImpudentMedico 

Complicated was the word when it came to Alex and herself. From barely speaking; from the rage of hate she felt for him. To the common goal; which was to raise a healthy child. To push aside our distaste for each other; well more so on my part. Jo knew she could’ve had it easy by not engaging by avoiding Alex especially when they first messaged after a month of him being gone. She could’ve gotten through the pregnancy on her own. She was built for it; to be alone. But one confession; one text changed the relationship she had with him. 

He was the dad; and as angry as she was with him; She didn’t want to be like Izzie; she didn’t want to keep a child from him. She still loved him; she wanted him to be apart of their child’s life even if it made her sick to see the pair had ended up. All that to say it wasn’t smooth sailing; but Jo had promised to keep him updated. To let him be there for her and their child. 

A promise she intended to keep. And that’s why Jo found herself digging into her purse when she stepped foot into the New York airport.  Stepping to the side as she listened to people chat, she found her phone letting fingers dance along the keys. 

[ Text} Alex. 

“ I debated telling you, but a promise is a promise. I’m in New York. I’ll be staying with Callie and Arizona so you know I’ll be safe.”  Not wanting to keep talking; Jo came to the city to move on from the last chapter not be dragged back into the old. But Jo also knew they had to figure out the next steps together. One text at a time. Because let’s be honest he left once; why wouldn’t Alex do it again? It was a fear; the reason why Jo was keeping him at arms length. Protecting herself. 

Slipping her phone into her coat pocket she slung her carry on over her shoulder and began to walk to the baggage claim; the signs directing her. A new Chapter; exhaling deeply Jo assured herself this was the right move for her.

[ofpowerwarrior]

The trauma is what build us. Jo Wilson wasn’t a stranger to the pain, she’s been handed an awful hand for her life. She was here because she held onto the pain and it drove her focus. It drove her to want to be the best surgeon, to prove to herself the strength she was capable of. There was a time when Jo didn’t value her life much, when she felt fear, when she would be trembling right now. She had a man that truly loved her with everything he had. And despite how Alex left; she wasn’t going to hold the grudge. She was mad as hell, she was hurting, she felt like she was suffocating inside. But Jo had weeks to deal with the gossip, with the haunted stares. Jo did the whole self pity party staying at Link’s before she decided to fled the city. She took a page out of Meredith’s book. She was disappearing; she didn’t want the stares, the gossips to start spirling once her stomach started to show. Her baby, her and Alex’s baby. 

It felt surreal, it felt complicated to explain. And even now as Jo was standing in the crowded airport with a familiar face, with Arizona. She felt out of place. She felt that safety and comfort in her own body, the habit to sneakingly place her hand over her stomach when the women had stepped back from each other. Having to tell people your husband left you for kids, for a ex wife that never saw his potential? It sucked, it was humiliating, it was a habit that Jo now felt used to. Everyone in the hospital knew; at first people asked “ How’s Jo? Or “ Izzie? What in the world? And Jo had to wear a smile and act unphased despite the knots despite how sick she felt. She vomited in the sinks, the toilets but now it wasn’t because of the aching in her skin, it was the baby; and each time Jo thought about her child she smiled. It was beautiful; and in this crazy unfortunate situation she knows her child was made with love, wholeheartedly. 

And for now She wore that soft smile, the one that she felt was real. Hearing the mention of the cravings, the brunette let a humored laugh escape her lips. Arizona always had that carefree energy, she always had a way of lifting the room. And right now being in her presence was exactly what I needed. To see her face, that dimpled smile, and I knew the right move was here in New York, be cared for, having a place to stay, and kind friends; Callie was my mentor at one point before she left; and I knew I was safe here. “ I’ve heard the stories, I remember when my intern year, when Meredith was grumpy during her time, and she would be eating any spare minute she had.” I had to laugh to myself; of course I knew each if I felt like fainting, that I had to eat, which is what I’ve been doing Link had always been the stickler for the eating; forcing tubes of pasta down my throat, but I was okay. Once the blonde had moved against the floors under us, Jo fell into step with the female. 

A short distance to the awaited car, Jo had carefully pulled her frame into the front of the car. She had pulled the clicking of the door shut. Hearing movements of baggage landing in the seats, along with the bubbly blonde finding her spot in the drivers seat. Her and Callie; it was cute, it was romantic even; their journey, their love that fell apart and found a healthy balance again. A smile continued until his name was popped up. Alex, the man of disappointment, the man that left and didn’t have the balls to tell Arizona himself. No sulking allowed, Jo scolded herself as lips formed a frown. “ He didn’t know I was pregnant, I didn’t know. But even now I told him, I never want to be Izzie, I never want to be the women that hides his kid from him. I don’t want anything from him. If he wants to be involved he can, I will let him, but that’s all. I don’t want him to want me, to want to be with us because of the child.” Jo had kept that one under her belt. She did call Alex and he was planning to come to New York to oversee some appoints insisting he wanted to be involved, and hey maybe Arizona could slap his arm or something, as for callie I nodded my head knowing I should be used to it. Saying the words He left me, for his crazy ex wife who never loved him but okay. Before I heard it I had never been more grateful to the change of topic, the center; and eyes casted along the window, as the car moved. Busy streets, the gloomy skies, and she loved the idea of witnessing the center Arizona helped make a name for, “ I’m really proud of you Arizona, leaving Seattle was hard, but here I met even if it was pink it’ll be stylish and make you feel safe.” A inside joke as she cracked a teasing smile on parted lips. Seattle well everyone hooking up with anything that moves apparently. Holding my tongue. 

“ It’s been nuts, obviously you know April left, but Amelia and link are actually expecting, although I’m not sure the baby is actually his..” Teeth sinking into her lip as she uttered the words. Messy; and Jo had her phone on her incase her best friend needed her; once he got his head out of his ass.

Someone to Lean on

@anunstablepast

Changes; for Jo it was normal to move from place to place. To form a new version of yourself. She had renamed herself; she had run from situations that felt haunting. A change of pace; a new place to settle down in felt normal. Jo never saw herself leaving Seattle; she never thought she’d have to. That was until her husband left her for an ex wife and a family he apparently always wanted. And Jo found herself pregnant and alone. She had Link who was her best friend; he’s been an angle in the last month. He’s ensured she ate, and took her to the few doctor appointments she had to go to. Especially if this move was to go as planned. Arizona had requested her scans; requested a last appointment with Carina before she board her flight. It was discrete, it was a need to know basis. Only a select few knew about the brunette’s condition. Jo didn’t want to be the talk of the hospital.

It took weeks for the whispers to stop. For the stares to stop after Alex left. After he abandoned her. Jo wanted to be okay; wanted to be happy. After a month of knowing; of starting to take care of herself she was adjusting. Carina promised not to tell; and Bailey understood her choice to leave town. Meredith was in the dark; she had manage to hide a pregnancy, she managed to still low until after she gave birth. That’s what she wanted; a place where she wasn’t the girl who got left. She wasn’t the girl with a crazy ex, Jo hated being spied on; being the talk of the hospital. The stars had lined up to where she was able to leave; go under the grid, with Bailey’s support; and having a place to stay with Arizona and Callie. She was lucky; to have a way out. It took a month given how awful her morning sickness had been. Jo had finally packed; the necessary items she needed; she was a light backer. Only a suitcase; and a carry on. She might be crazy; but the way the female looked at it was.. Her body was growing; she’s gonna be growing out of her cloths in a few months; and if she forgot anything that was required; she could pick it up in New York. 

She decided not to drive herself crazy; the hardest part was saying goodbye to Link. After much pleading; her friend understood why she needed to go for herself. It wasn’t about running; because Jo knew her home was Seattle; but in order for her to have her baby on her terms; she had to escape. Alex did a number on her; he ghosted her until he felt remorse; felt the need to own up to his mistakes. Jo wasn’t intending on sharing this news with him. But he reached out a few weeks ago; and he apologized; and one heat of the moment text ended with her uttering the words. In a single text; her good heart now had her attempting at a co-parenting arrangement with him; even if it hurt her. 

She was expected to inform him she landed when her plane landed in New York. Although the jury was out on that one. She was brought out of her thoughts when she heard the intercom; the announcement that the plane was landing. Fingers gripped hold of the armrest as she felt the right landing; luckily her stomach was playing nice with her today. Within minutes people were getting up. Jo was only about 3 months so she wasn’t showing yet; and decided to take the time to shoot the blonde a quick text. 

[ Text] Arizona. 

“ Just wanted to let you know I landed okay.” 

With a quick press of a send the brunette slowly lifted herself up to her feet. Lines of people exiting; she’d patiently wait. Jo wasn’t expecting Arizona to get her; she had an uber app set in, in case she had to call for a car. One problem at a time.

[ofpowerwarrior]

Jo was the one that kept herself in check. She had to hold the control in her life. She’s let her guard down way too many times before. She trusted blinded; with paul and he ended up being the person that used her words against her. He justified his actions for beating her to a pope. And for the longest time Jo didn’t value her life much, she didn’t think she was worthy of a future; she was in the system since she was a baby. She never felt wanted, desired. She felt alone and she never planned on ever letting her guard down again until him. 

Alex Karev, he was the worse guy she’d met when she first came to Seattle, the cocky attitude, the man was a manwhore literally slept with each one of her intern class. Jo said it once she had no interest in him. And at the time she didn’t. But along the course of the year she got to know Alex his tender heart; he’d been someone who was forced to pick up pieces, he came from nothing like herself. And we bonded; he saw me for the mess I was. And he was a damn good man; someone I fell for easily. Jo believed him when he vowed to love her forever; she got married not once but twice. You’d think once the diamond was on her finger it would last. She was naive, and she was blindsided when one day he lied. He left her, she felt like she couldn’t breathe. Jo felt like she was crumbling, that the love we shared was meaningless. Alex left. He abandoned me, he tossed me away like I was garbage. Broken promises; and now Jo felt hope. Not for herself and Alex because that bridge was tainted. 

He broke every promise he ever made. He broke a piece of her; the day he left. For Izzie, and those kids; and deep down the brunette understood why he left. He had kids; he never wanted to end up like his deadbeat of a father. He wanted to be present, he wanted to be a father to the kids. And Jo understood that; what she couldn’t understand was him leaving her; not a conversation. He just decided our marriage was over without a care. What was I? Did I mean anything to you? She wanted to scream the words; and she planned to when she saw him; for the first time tomorrow. The thought formed knots in the pit of her stomach. 

Loss love, abandonment; Jo never thought she’d be carrying a child; our child which is the only reason she’s been sending messages, receiving messages from the man who broke her; that tore her to shreds. Jo held her stomach as she sat on the comfort of Arizona’s couch, the flashing of lights from a movie playing; she felt Sofia come to sit next to her on the couch, and she smiled at her. Jo handed the younger girl the remote. “ You pick.” And of course Sofia started flipping aimlessly through the channels. A distraction before Jo felt the beep; a text from him. Her stomach was in knots over seeing him. Did he grow a dad beard? Was he still the same Alex? She wondered, and she felt her heart soar as she read over the message. 

Excuse after excuse; you left me for her; it’s in the damn letter. She had your kids; you were in love with her, which begs the question again what was I? A rebound until Izzie was ready for the man you’ve become? Rolling my eyes I started to respond. 

[ Text] Alex 

Do you love her? You did say you did love her still? Or have you forgotten that part? I don’t care what arrangement you two have is yours. Nothing to do with me and my baby. I’m only giving you the benefit of the doubt for our child. I’m not Izzie, I don’t want to deprive you of knowing your child from the start, I’m better than that. This, we’re not working us out Alex. You made sure of it when you left, You’re involved for the baby, and only for the baby.” She typed each sentence with a heavy heart. It peeled an ache inside of her; but keeping him at arms distance was best; to protect herself from getting hurt again. She’d send him the address in the morning; for now she intended on watching a movie with Sofia; until Arizona and Callie were done with sorting dinner. It’ll all work out right? 

Starting Again

@ImpudentMedico 

Complicated was the word when it came to Alex and herself. From barely speaking; from the rage of hate she felt for him. To the common goal; which was to raise a healthy child. To push aside our distaste for each other; well more so on my part. Jo knew she could’ve had it easy by not engaging by avoiding Alex especially when they first messaged after a month of him being gone. She could’ve gotten through the pregnancy on her own. She was built for it; to be alone. But one confession; one text changed the relationship she had with him. 

He was the dad; and as angry as she was with him; She didn’t want to be like Izzie; she didn’t want to keep a child from him. She still loved him; she wanted him to be apart of their child’s life even if it made her sick to see the pair had ended up. All that to say it wasn’t smooth sailing; but Jo had promised to keep him updated. To let him be there for her and their child. 

A promise she intended to keep. And that’s why Jo found herself digging into her purse when she stepped foot into the New York airport.  Stepping to the side as she listened to people chat, she found her phone letting fingers dance along the keys. 

[ Text} Alex. 

“ I debated telling you, but a promise is a promise. I’m in New York. I’ll be staying with Callie and Arizona so you know I’ll be safe.”  Not wanting to keep talking; Jo came to the city to move on from the last chapter not be dragged back into the old. But Jo also knew they had to figure out the next steps together. One text at a time. Because let’s be honest he left once; why wouldn’t Alex do it again? It was a fear; the reason why Jo was keeping him at arms length. Protecting herself. 

Slipping her phone into her coat pocket she slung her carry on over her shoulder and began to walk to the baggage claim; the signs directing her. A new Chapter; exhaling deeply Jo assured herself this was the right move for her.

[ofpowerwarrior]

Jo had isolated herself after the bombshell that was Alex Karev. The damn letter she wished she could forget. The words, the lies; all the promises he ever made her. It felt like a nightmare Jo was finding hard to wake up from. One second she had the future she wanted; her career; her passions for research, her husband the man that adored her. That loved her completely and the next her life felt like an awful movie. Shattered pieces against the wall. Jo was so mad at him; she wanted to ring his head for being an idiot. For being the guy she loved, but also the guy she now despised. And Arizona I felt for her; because she was left in the dark. She had no idea that her right hand man that left. I was the burrier of bad news; of course I felt that guilt. My emotions were heighten. Jo didn’t know how she was doing. She was just grateful for Arizona the women she trusted to help her. 

Jo didn’t want to see anyone. To hear the lingering whispers of abandonment; of how Alex never loved her. She was the girl who was left, and god she could only imagine what the gossip would say when word got out about her situation. She was pregnant carrying the baby of the man who left her. For an ex wife who never deserved him might the brunette add. She was a charity case; the only person she was willing to see was Link; and he was great. He made sure I got on the plane; that I was fed and taken care of. Jo knew who her people were. But leaving to New York was the right move for her. She needed to breathe; she needed to not feel like she was under a microscope. She wanted to ensure her health and her baby. It was the last piece of our love; even if broken now. Jo found herself subconsciously holding her hand to her stomach; barely showing as of late. But she held her own; her stomach as she walked over to the blonde. A bright smile lingered against her lips. 

Arizona her perky attitude; she was happy to see her. With a tangle of arms she managed to wrap her arm around the blonde in a brief hug. “ Yeah..” She briefly aired out knowing the hint. The place crash it felt like years ago; the fear of not landing. The fear of losing yourself. Jo couldn’t begin to put herself in the blonde’s shoes, but she understood her meaning. With a brief hug the female had stepped back with her sweater pulled closer to her frame. Hand moving to touch the handle of her suitcase; and she knew the blonde was going to assist it was who Arizona was. As for Callie; she was a friend; someone I did message for advise. Especially where my career was involved. Callie was my mentor; the person I looked up to, and now we were in the same place; I did wonder if she was proud the path I decided upon. The walk outside was calming. The spotting of the SUV; I was impressed with the mode of transportation. “ I know every expectant mother is different, all I know is peanut butter and pickles are like my main craving right now.” I utter almost in shame as I slowly pulled my frame into the car, once I was sat in the front with the blonde; I pulled my seatbelt over my frame hearing the click. 

“ It’s sweet, I’m happy you two found your way back. I’m happy to be here I trust you.” A meaningful expression rose on her features. It was sweet all the damage; the pain caused and these two people found a way back it kinda gave me hope for the future. Keeping that thought to myself the brunette had a wistful hum to her as her eyes casted to the glass on her window. “ “ I can’t wait to see the center; and the diner, lead the way.” A humming on her lips; a new chapter; Jo was all for the taking.

Someone to Lean on

@anunstablepast

Changes; for Jo it was normal to move from place to place. To form a new version of yourself. She had renamed herself; she had run from situations that felt haunting. A change of pace; a new place to settle down in felt normal. Jo never saw herself leaving Seattle; she never thought she’d have to. That was until her husband left her for an ex wife and a family he apparently always wanted. And Jo found herself pregnant and alone. She had Link who was her best friend; he’s been an angle in the last month. He’s ensured she ate, and took her to the few doctor appointments she had to go to. Especially if this move was to go as planned. Arizona had requested her scans; requested a last appointment with Carina before she board her flight. It was discrete, it was a need to know basis. Only a select few knew about the brunette’s condition. Jo didn’t want to be the talk of the hospital.

It took weeks for the whispers to stop. For the stares to stop after Alex left. After he abandoned her. Jo wanted to be okay; wanted to be happy. After a month of knowing; of starting to take care of herself she was adjusting. Carina promised not to tell; and Bailey understood her choice to leave town. Meredith was in the dark; she had manage to hide a pregnancy, she managed to still low until after she gave birth. That’s what she wanted; a place where she wasn’t the girl who got left. She wasn’t the girl with a crazy ex, Jo hated being spied on; being the talk of the hospital. The stars had lined up to where she was able to leave; go under the grid, with Bailey’s support; and having a place to stay with Arizona and Callie. She was lucky; to have a way out. It took a month given how awful her morning sickness had been. Jo had finally packed; the necessary items she needed; she was a light backer. Only a suitcase; and a carry on. She might be crazy; but the way the female looked at it was.. Her body was growing; she’s gonna be growing out of her cloths in a few months; and if she forgot anything that was required; she could pick it up in New York. 

She decided not to drive herself crazy; the hardest part was saying goodbye to Link. After much pleading; her friend understood why she needed to go for herself. It wasn’t about running; because Jo knew her home was Seattle; but in order for her to have her baby on her terms; she had to escape. Alex did a number on her; he ghosted her until he felt remorse; felt the need to own up to his mistakes. Jo wasn’t intending on sharing this news with him. But he reached out a few weeks ago; and he apologized; and one heat of the moment text ended with her uttering the words. In a single text; her good heart now had her attempting at a co-parenting arrangement with him; even if it hurt her. 

She was expected to inform him she landed when her plane landed in New York. Although the jury was out on that one. She was brought out of her thoughts when she heard the intercom; the announcement that the plane was landing. Fingers gripped hold of the armrest as she felt the right landing; luckily her stomach was playing nice with her today. Within minutes people were getting up. Jo was only about 3 months so she wasn’t showing yet; and decided to take the time to shoot the blonde a quick text. 

[ Text] Arizona. 

“ Just wanted to let you know I landed okay.” 

With a quick press of a send the brunette slowly lifted herself up to her feet. Lines of people exiting; she’d patiently wait. Jo wasn’t expecting Arizona to get her; she had an uber app set in, in case she had to call for a car. One problem at a time.

[ofpowerwarrior]

Jo had always thought she was a reasonable person, may even say understanding. Jo always supported Alex, in any endeavor he wanted to pressure. When he tried to fight for Yang’s board seat, she was the one who had his back. Was patient as he shared rooms with Mereifth. She was the one who stood by him with his dad; she held his hand. She always supported him. Jo wasn’t being unreasonable when she felt torn with her own morals. Was it okay to let her guard down with him? Simply because he was the father of her baby; or was that reason enough to stay hidden, to rebuild her walls so high that no one would be able to break them. 

Trust was earned; Jo had trusted Alex. She had loved him and would’ve crossed mountains for him. She would’ve went with him to see and meet his kids. That wasn’t why she was mad. She was made because instead of being honest with her he ghosted her. He went missing for weeks; she had to hear from his mother that he was never in Iowa, that he had never gone to see his mother. Instead of picking up her many phone calls he was silent, he left her. And no she wasn’t going to jump the gun and assumed Alex never loved her; that she was a placement holder until he could find a way to be with Izzy again. It didn’t fit his character; didn’t fit the way he used to look at her with adoring love. The way he held her tightly to his chest at night. The feeling of safety and warmth. And now she was sad, she probably looked pathic on some days her shuffling of feet. Not that she found herself stepping foot into the hospital unless it was an emergency. She was hiding; she found out she was pregnant the idea rocked her world; flipped the female upside down. It gave her a glimmer of hope; a hope that she’d be able to hold onto a piece of him. But she couldn’t stay in Seattle; she decided with her well thought out plan; New York; Arizona had offered her place. She had offered to be a friend; to help her through this chapter. 

So New York the big apple is where Jo found herself sitting. She had found her way to Arizona’s the apartment was nice; Cozy if you may. She had her leg crossed one over the other as she sat by one of the many windows. Her phone in hand as she read his message. Jo never wanted to be Izzy; she debated in her head the pros and cons of saying the words. Of telling him he was a new dad to those kids; but he also was going to be a dad to our little one; even if I had a salty taste in my mouth at the sound of his name; I still loved him. I wanted Alex to be a part of our live; even if that picture looked more like co-parenting than the big happy family we envisioned in our minds. 

A soft smile landed on bare lips as we typed out a message to him. Her guy; well ex but the guy who she still loved deeply. As crazy as he was; and an idiot might Jo add. { Text] Alex: “ You don’t have to defend yourself to me. I don’t care if you talk to her or not. We’re.. Strictly co-parenting our child. You’re free to sleep in the same bed as her or anyone you please. You decided that when you left.” She decided to stop herself before typing the same applies to herself; not that Jo was thinking of dating absolutely not. Her focus was her baby; and Alex made a mistake as he omits, but how can I trust him? I can’t I had to protect my heart. Glancing to the small bump on her stomach; she whispered “ Tomorrow is the day.” The day we see each other; the day we get to have awkward conversation. 

The day I get to see the image of you, our baby; the absolute joy I felt as I place my phone down. We never planned this; but I had to believe our child would be loved regardless of where us end up.

Starting Again

@ImpudentMedico 

Complicated was the word when it came to Alex and herself. From barely speaking; from the rage of hate she felt for him. To the common goal; which was to raise a healthy child. To push aside our distaste for each other; well more so on my part. Jo knew she could’ve had it easy by not engaging by avoiding Alex especially when they first messaged after a month of him being gone. She could’ve gotten through the pregnancy on her own. She was built for it; to be alone. But one confession; one text changed the relationship she had with him. 

He was the dad; and as angry as she was with him; She didn’t want to be like Izzie; she didn’t want to keep a child from him. She still loved him; she wanted him to be apart of their child’s life even if it made her sick to see the pair had ended up. All that to say it wasn’t smooth sailing; but Jo had promised to keep him updated. To let him be there for her and their child. 

A promise she intended to keep. And that’s why Jo found herself digging into her purse when she stepped foot into the New York airport.  Stepping to the side as she listened to people chat, she found her phone letting fingers dance along the keys. 

[ Text} Alex. 

“ I debated telling you, but a promise is a promise. I’m in New York. I’ll be staying with Callie and Arizona so you know I’ll be safe.”  Not wanting to keep talking; Jo came to the city to move on from the last chapter not be dragged back into the old. But Jo also knew they had to figure out the next steps together. One text at a time. Because let’s be honest he left once; why wouldn’t Alex do it again? It was a fear; the reason why Jo was keeping him at arms length. Protecting herself. 

Slipping her phone into her coat pocket she slung her carry on over her shoulder and began to walk to the baggage claim; the signs directing her. A new Chapter; exhaling deeply Jo assured herself this was the right move for her.

[ofpowerwarrior]

Asking for help, being the one who was taken care of. Was never in Jo’s nature. Knowing her limitations was knew. She wanted to keep moving, stay busy. Because she was still reeling from the loss, from the future she had always believed she had with him. And now she was holding onto her own, the need to stay strong. The new to be a protector of her own for herself and her child. The child that was his, a blissful thought. We had a miracle on our side. But still the thought of limiting myself, the thought of leaning on someone else was scary. Last time Jo had she was royalty disappointed. But Arizona and Callie; knew her; they were safe and she desperately needed an escape. She needed to be hidden from the prying eyes until she gave birth. Jo knew she was starting to show; it was becoming harder to hide with her big sweaters; why even when it was hot, she was still in baggy clothes. The sweaters were cute, but eventually someone was going to put the dots together. 

New York was a busy city, the airport was evidence enough. The place had people running down lanes, people uttering excuse you as Jo paced herself taking each step slowly. Not because she was tired or in pain. No because seeing the blonde, enfolding her into a big hug meant this was real; a new reality for her. One that she never saw coming. But oddly enough as she held her hand to her lower stomach where her baby was growing she felt relief and excitement. More excitement when the blonde had come into view. Jo knew Arizona was upset at Alex and felt a tad guilty she was left completely in the dark. Knowing Alex he knew his mentor was going to chew him out, which resulted in him giving that silent treatment. That thought was for another time. Instead a beaming smile layered against her lips as she embraced Arizona, the safety she brought; it was nice to be near someone who knew about her situation, and nice to not feel judged stares on her. 

Once the brunette had stepped backwards, her purse was pushed to her shoulder, hand lifted her suitcase to hand over to the female. She was grateful to be welcomed with open arms. Her flight was overall okay, she couldn’t complain. But the hungrier she felt; yeah that was nothing new for her. Jo had always been an eater, but the cravings like pickles, like peanut butter on practically any type of food was new. She had let out a small laugh as the pair started towards the exit doors of the airport. “ As long as it has an ounce of peanut butter involved I think I’ll love it. I don’t know what it is but pickles and Peanut butter has been a constant craving. I never liked Pickles..” A humored laugh as she inched closer to the car that just beeped. Jo had went to the passenger’s side door, lifting the handle as aimed her eyes over to the blonde. 

“ If Callie had still been in Seattle I can admit I probably would’ve gone over to Ortho. I felt that rush, I lit up at the thought of a broken bone to fix one. It was joy to me. So I don’t think Callie would have to work hard to turn me over to my passion of Ortho.” Honesty; Jo missed it’ Callie was her mentor until she left; and her path was altered, but now perhaps that joy, that passion could return. Ducking her head down she lowered herself back into the seat as her feet hit the padding in front of her, head leaned back against the headrest. Once she heard the closing of the door and felt Arizona’s presence again she uttered with a smile. “ Thank you, for everything. For letting me come. For knowing I needed to leave Seattle. You aren’t just my doctor here, but my friend.” Jo was feeling emotional these damn hornmores; she had to snap out of it.

Someone to Lean on

@anunstablepast

Changes; for Jo it was normal to move from place to place. To form a new version of yourself. She had renamed herself; she had run from situations that felt haunting. A change of pace; a new place to settle down in felt normal. Jo never saw herself leaving Seattle; she never thought she’d have to. That was until her husband left her for an ex wife and a family he apparently always wanted. And Jo found herself pregnant and alone. She had Link who was her best friend; he’s been an angle in the last month. He’s ensured she ate, and took her to the few doctor appointments she had to go to. Especially if this move was to go as planned. Arizona had requested her scans; requested a last appointment with Carina before she board her flight. It was discrete, it was a need to know basis. Only a select few knew about the brunette’s condition. Jo didn’t want to be the talk of the hospital.

It took weeks for the whispers to stop. For the stares to stop after Alex left. After he abandoned her. Jo wanted to be okay; wanted to be happy. After a month of knowing; of starting to take care of herself she was adjusting. Carina promised not to tell; and Bailey understood her choice to leave town. Meredith was in the dark; she had manage to hide a pregnancy, she managed to still low until after she gave birth. That’s what she wanted; a place where she wasn’t the girl who got left. She wasn’t the girl with a crazy ex, Jo hated being spied on; being the talk of the hospital. The stars had lined up to where she was able to leave; go under the grid, with Bailey’s support; and having a place to stay with Arizona and Callie. She was lucky; to have a way out. It took a month given how awful her morning sickness had been. Jo had finally packed; the necessary items she needed; she was a light backer. Only a suitcase; and a carry on. She might be crazy; but the way the female looked at it was.. Her body was growing; she’s gonna be growing out of her cloths in a few months; and if she forgot anything that was required; she could pick it up in New York. 

She decided not to drive herself crazy; the hardest part was saying goodbye to Link. After much pleading; her friend understood why she needed to go for herself. It wasn’t about running; because Jo knew her home was Seattle; but in order for her to have her baby on her terms; she had to escape. Alex did a number on her; he ghosted her until he felt remorse; felt the need to own up to his mistakes. Jo wasn’t intending on sharing this news with him. But he reached out a few weeks ago; and he apologized; and one heat of the moment text ended with her uttering the words. In a single text; her good heart now had her attempting at a co-parenting arrangement with him; even if it hurt her. 

She was expected to inform him she landed when her plane landed in New York. Although the jury was out on that one. She was brought out of her thoughts when she heard the intercom; the announcement that the plane was landing. Fingers gripped hold of the armrest as she felt the right landing; luckily her stomach was playing nice with her today. Within minutes people were getting up. Jo was only about 3 months so she wasn’t showing yet; and decided to take the time to shoot the blonde a quick text. 

[ Text] Arizona. 

“ Just wanted to let you know I landed okay.” 

With a quick press of a send the brunette slowly lifted herself up to her feet. Lines of people exiting; she’d patiently wait. Jo wasn’t expecting Arizona to get her; she had an uber app set in, in case she had to call for a car. One problem at a time.

[ofpowerwarrior]

The future we thought we had now looked quite different. Alex and I weren’t together he made sure it. All the broken promises he made over the years gone. Each time he told me he loved me I believed him. Each time he told me he was always coming home to me I believed him. Trust was earned; I let my guard down for him. It took years for me to accept being loved by a man like Alex. To believe I was worthy of love. Jo only counted on herself growing up; she had to protect her heart. Alex made me feel worthy of love, made me feel that passion of love people only dream about. And I thought we had a future; we had only just gotten remarried again a few weeks prior, but then he pulled the rug out from under me. 

I grieved his loss, the loss of our future, his letter tore me up inside. I felt like the air from my body had left me. Each word stung more than the last. I had to ask myself what was I? A placement until Izzie that home wrecker was ready for him? I was devastated, I was hurt. I felt like I was torn into two. We were two halves of a whole. But right now wasn’t about me, or how angry I was with him. It was about the little human growing inside of me. I had plans; I didn’t want to be the whisper the talk of the town. So I took a note from Meredith's book and I left town. I had a place to stay in New York with Arizona and Callie. I wanted to be the best mother I could; I wanted to be hidden from prying eyes. The only thing was I refused to be that home wrecker, I couldn’t lie to Alex. Not that he deserved for me to let him in again because didn’t. If i had stopped loving him maybe I could’ve been strong enough to not say a word. But I didn’t want him to feel like I was Izzie, like I was capable of deceiving him, keeping a child from him. So I was the adult; I told him the plan for New York; my appointments because if he could I wanted him to feel welcomed to come, I wasn’t alone and neither was he. 

Swallowing the lump that formed in my throat as I edged to the sidewalk; closer to the way home; a new place of living. Shoulders fell in defeat as I heard the familiar tone of the phone. A new message probably from him. Brown eyes glanced to the screen she held in her palms. His message; I had to scoff out a laugh; mad me? At him? Oh if he thought I was capable of being mad before, my hormones were off the charts down, but I ended the message with a hint of a smile; he wanted to be there for our child. It wasn’t about us; our history; the pain caused; I was doing everything I could be civil for our child. I didn’t want to be afraid to be around him. And perhaps him willing to visit now would prepare us for the awkwardness, how we would be able to co=parent once our child came to the world. Placing a comforting hand over my stomach as I used my other hand to type out a response. 

[ Text} Alex 

“ I want to not be mad at you, but I am. You destroyed everything for that women when there was an easier way for us. And now we’re going to be parents, what we talked about but that joy I wanted to feel was clouded by the hurt you caused. But I’m trying to be okay with this, where we stand now. You can say what you want on the Izzie front but you’re still choosing her even now because you left. All those broken promises mean nothing now. Be safe, I’ll see you soon.” Civil even if she was bursting with anger; she frustrate placed her phone back in her pocket as she pulled herself into the waiting car; one that would bring her to the place she’ll be staying; a new chapter for herself. Alex or not.

Starting Again

@ImpudentMedico 

Complicated was the word when it came to Alex and herself. From barely speaking; from the rage of hate she felt for him. To the common goal; which was to raise a healthy child. To push aside our distaste for each other; well more so on my part. Jo knew she could’ve had it easy by not engaging by avoiding Alex especially when they first messaged after a month of him being gone. She could’ve gotten through the pregnancy on her own. She was built for it; to be alone. But one confession; one text changed the relationship she had with him. 

He was the dad; and as angry as she was with him; She didn’t want to be like Izzie; she didn’t want to keep a child from him. She still loved him; she wanted him to be apart of their child’s life even if it made her sick to see the pair had ended up. All that to say it wasn’t smooth sailing; but Jo had promised to keep him updated. To let him be there for her and their child. 

A promise she intended to keep. And that’s why Jo found herself digging into her purse when she stepped foot into the New York airport.  Stepping to the side as she listened to people chat, she found her phone letting fingers dance along the keys. 

[ Text} Alex. 

“ I debated telling you, but a promise is a promise. I’m in New York. I’ll be staying with Callie and Arizona so you know I’ll be safe.”  Not wanting to keep talking; Jo came to the city to move on from the last chapter not be dragged back into the old. But Jo also knew they had to figure out the next steps together. One text at a time. Because let’s be honest he left once; why wouldn’t Alex do it again? It was a fear; the reason why Jo was keeping him at arms length. Protecting herself. 

Slipping her phone into her coat pocket she slung her carry on over her shoulder and began to walk to the baggage claim; the signs directing her. A new Chapter; exhaling deeply Jo assured herself this was the right move for her.

[ofpowerwarrior]

The nerves had settled in. The fear of being alone, of handling the weight of another human being was slowly fading. Because although Jo wanted to lay low, she wanted to move to New York until her baby came, she knew in Settle she had people on her side. Link had been overbearing up until she stepped through the gates to board her plane. She assured him she was okay, and even when she landed like she had sent a quick message to the blonde, she sent one to her best friend. In case he was flipping out; it was kinda sweet. But Jo was built for the hurt, she was built for the breaking of pieces that required you to rebuild. She was on her own her whole life; she made mistakes of her own. 

But this baby despite the meaning; of a lost love, a future she assumed she had in her head, no longer existed, she had to rebuild and this baby was made out of complete love. She knew it was the only tie she had to Alex. His name left a distaste in her mouth. Yeah they had briefly spoken, she told him and he wanted to come to New York in a few weeks to be there. Not wanting to be the absent father; but he was only here for our child not because he realized he made a mistake. It stung; but that’s why Jo decided to keep that communication hush hush, not wanting to ruffle any feathers. All that to say; the female had left things open ended. 

Right now she was focused on herself; on getting the right health information for herself and her unborn child. She trusted Arizona and given how close she wanted to be to the blonde and Callie, she knew this was the right move for her. Jo felt oddly at ease as she turned the corner leading to where Arizona sat, her blonde locks, her dimpled warm smile was a dead give away. The brunette had made her way through the crowds of people until she managed to reach the female. Her now short brunette locks hitting the top of her shoulders. Her sweater was covering the small bump that was now forming. She was now getting more comfortable with the feeling of being more conscious of how she moved, the fear of doing any unintentional harm to the baby was heavily on her mind. A smile formed at the corners of her lips as she felt the pair of arms wrap around her frame, she embraced the female as she felt the comfort for a second before arm came to rest back to her sides. 

“ You know stuffy planes I could do without. I definitely prefer to drive to other states than flying.” I had drove everywhere growing up, this now felt weird, but I was landed, I was safe and in the present of the best fetal surgeon in the country; definitely more reassuring if you asked her. She sensed how careful Arizona was being; her words beating around the brush as she felt grateful for. “ I’m always hungry, although the weird cravings this little one gets is a bit concerning.” A joke a lightness to her voice as she pressed the handle of her suitcase to Arizona as her other rested comfortingly against her stomach; it would become a habit. She knew she could trust Arizona with her care; excited to see the new center; to witness Arizona in her element; the brunette echoed out a light laugh as she teased with her next words. 

“ Well you know, I was always Callie’s favorite intern, the joy we both had for the field, makes sense she’d be more the overbearing kind.” A sentiment; one I felt was earned, Callie was a wonderful person; her care for you; and as we walked out; I felt at ease knowing I couldn’t of asked for help from better individuals.

Someone to Lean on

@anunstablepast

Changes; for Jo it was normal to move from place to place. To form a new version of yourself. She had renamed herself; she had run from situations that felt haunting. A change of pace; a new place to settle down in felt normal. Jo never saw herself leaving Seattle; she never thought she’d have to. That was until her husband left her for an ex wife and a family he apparently always wanted. And Jo found herself pregnant and alone. She had Link who was her best friend; he’s been an angle in the last month. He’s ensured she ate, and took her to the few doctor appointments she had to go to. Especially if this move was to go as planned. Arizona had requested her scans; requested a last appointment with Carina before she board her flight. It was discrete, it was a need to know basis. Only a select few knew about the brunette’s condition. Jo didn’t want to be the talk of the hospital.

It took weeks for the whispers to stop. For the stares to stop after Alex left. After he abandoned her. Jo wanted to be okay; wanted to be happy. After a month of knowing; of starting to take care of herself she was adjusting. Carina promised not to tell; and Bailey understood her choice to leave town. Meredith was in the dark; she had manage to hide a pregnancy, she managed to still low until after she gave birth. That’s what she wanted; a place where she wasn’t the girl who got left. She wasn’t the girl with a crazy ex, Jo hated being spied on; being the talk of the hospital. The stars had lined up to where she was able to leave; go under the grid, with Bailey’s support; and having a place to stay with Arizona and Callie. She was lucky; to have a way out. It took a month given how awful her morning sickness had been. Jo had finally packed; the necessary items she needed; she was a light backer. Only a suitcase; and a carry on. She might be crazy; but the way the female looked at it was.. Her body was growing; she’s gonna be growing out of her cloths in a few months; and if she forgot anything that was required; she could pick it up in New York. 

She decided not to drive herself crazy; the hardest part was saying goodbye to Link. After much pleading; her friend understood why she needed to go for herself. It wasn’t about running; because Jo knew her home was Seattle; but in order for her to have her baby on her terms; she had to escape. Alex did a number on her; he ghosted her until he felt remorse; felt the need to own up to his mistakes. Jo wasn’t intending on sharing this news with him. But he reached out a few weeks ago; and he apologized; and one heat of the moment text ended with her uttering the words. In a single text; her good heart now had her attempting at a co-parenting arrangement with him; even if it hurt her. 

She was expected to inform him she landed when her plane landed in New York. Although the jury was out on that one. She was brought out of her thoughts when she heard the intercom; the announcement that the plane was landing. Fingers gripped hold of the armrest as she felt the right landing; luckily her stomach was playing nice with her today. Within minutes people were getting up. Jo was only about 3 months so she wasn’t showing yet; and decided to take the time to shoot the blonde a quick text. 

[ Text] Arizona. 

“ Just wanted to let you know I landed okay.” 

With a quick press of a send the brunette slowly lifted herself up to her feet. Lines of people exiting; she’d patiently wait. Jo wasn’t expecting Arizona to get her; she had an uber app set in, in case she had to call for a car. One problem at a time.

[ofpowerwarrior]

The fear played inside of her. Jo hated the idea of needing someone else, of feeling like she was weak. But this chapter; the chapter of becoming a mother was all new to her, and scary. She felt like she might explode because she was on her own. She never thought this was the stage she’d be in. In her mind Alex would’ve always been with her; and now since he left; it was only herself. She didn’t want to feel those awkward stares or to hear that horric gossip through the hospital which is what led her to deciding to leave town. To disappear to a place where she felt safe; and that was in new York with Callie and Arizona. She needed to know her baby was healthy; and she only trusted one person to ensure her safety and the baby; and that’s why she came once she had the okay. 

The plane was awful especially when it came to stepping off the flight. She hated being so close to people, especially with her body changing, her stomach wasn’t completely showing yet, but her stomach was rounder now. And she did feel self conscious about herself because she felt like it was hard to walk at times. But as she neared out of the plane she felt herself become comfortable. She felt herself step off and notice the familiar signs to baggage claim. She let out a small sigh of relief as she did walk the small distance. Jo didn’t want to ask for help; but this spot she was in felt worn, she felt like she was torn with herself. And Arizona might be the one person she could lean on if needed. 

Alex; he wanted to help, he wanted to be a part of her pragency and which she felt was thoughtful; he didn’t completely turn his back on her; but once she saw the blonde she might say the words to her; but for right now she was more focused on arriving to her baggage before she attempted to make a form of small talk. Especially about Arizona’s ex trainee, and her baby daddy as they call it. 

Each step felt like a mile, but she pulled through it until Jo’s eyes landed on the female who was seated in a chair. She spoke letting the blonde know she was seen. Pulling herself forward her arms folded around the female in a hug. “ Hi.” Shy almost because the pair had grown close due to Alex, but now it did kinda feel awkward in a sense. A small laugh escaped bare lips as she pulled herself back from the hug. 

“ We can catch a quick lunch if you want. I’m always hungry. But I do want to see how baby is doing.” She trusted Arizona; despite the circumstances. And she did want to just move forward; but her body had to come first and right now it craved food. Shoulders pulled into a slight shrug she let the blonde take her bag. 

“ I can handle my bags; at least one.” A soft smile aimed for the blonde.

Someone to Lean on

@anunstablepast

Changes; for Jo it was normal to move from place to place. To form a new version of yourself. She had renamed herself; she had run from situations that felt haunting. A change of pace; a new place to settle down in felt normal. Jo never saw herself leaving Seattle; she never thought she’d have to. That was until her husband left her for an ex wife and a family he apparently always wanted. And Jo found herself pregnant and alone. She had Link who was her best friend; he’s been an angle in the last month. He’s ensured she ate, and took her to the few doctor appointments she had to go to. Especially if this move was to go as planned. Arizona had requested her scans; requested a last appointment with Carina before she board her flight. It was discrete, it was a need to know basis. Only a select few knew about the brunette’s condition. Jo didn’t want to be the talk of the hospital.

It took weeks for the whispers to stop. For the stares to stop after Alex left. After he abandoned her. Jo wanted to be okay; wanted to be happy. After a month of knowing; of starting to take care of herself she was adjusting. Carina promised not to tell; and Bailey understood her choice to leave town. Meredith was in the dark; she had manage to hide a pregnancy, she managed to still low until after she gave birth. That’s what she wanted; a place where she wasn’t the girl who got left. She wasn’t the girl with a crazy ex, Jo hated being spied on; being the talk of the hospital. The stars had lined up to where she was able to leave; go under the grid, with Bailey’s support; and having a place to stay with Arizona and Callie. She was lucky; to have a way out. It took a month given how awful her morning sickness had been. Jo had finally packed; the necessary items she needed; she was a light backer. Only a suitcase; and a carry on. She might be crazy; but the way the female looked at it was.. Her body was growing; she’s gonna be growing out of her cloths in a few months; and if she forgot anything that was required; she could pick it up in New York. 

She decided not to drive herself crazy; the hardest part was saying goodbye to Link. After much pleading; her friend understood why she needed to go for herself. It wasn’t about running; because Jo knew her home was Seattle; but in order for her to have her baby on her terms; she had to escape. Alex did a number on her; he ghosted her until he felt remorse; felt the need to own up to his mistakes. Jo wasn’t intending on sharing this news with him. But he reached out a few weeks ago; and he apologized; and one heat of the moment text ended with her uttering the words. In a single text; her good heart now had her attempting at a co-parenting arrangement with him; even if it hurt her. 

She was expected to inform him she landed when her plane landed in New York. Although the jury was out on that one. She was brought out of her thoughts when she heard the intercom; the announcement that the plane was landing. Fingers gripped hold of the armrest as she felt the right landing; luckily her stomach was playing nice with her today. Within minutes people were getting up. Jo was only about 3 months so she wasn’t showing yet; and decided to take the time to shoot the blonde a quick text. 

[ Text] Arizona. 

“ Just wanted to let you know I landed okay.” 

With a quick press of a send the brunette slowly lifted herself up to her feet. Lines of people exiting; she’d patiently wait. Jo wasn’t expecting Arizona to get her; she had an uber app set in, in case she had to call for a car. One problem at a time.

[ofpowerwarrior]

Jo remembered it all; all the ways Alex had showed her how much love meant to him. She had recalled how she fell for him. He was stubborn at first; he was the one who was difficult to work with. He had flirted his way through her intern class, and he was the one that tried to act cool. Jo had seen beneath his flaws, he was a good guy at heart. We had become friends before we ever became involved. And now she was kinda grateful to the fact we had been friends before falling in love. Because right now what I needed was a friend; not a lover. Alex had shown me what love was; that I was worthy of love. But he also showed me how I could be tossed aside like I meant nothing to him. And honestly it sucked especially now as this chapter of being pregnant with his baby; and feeling alone. 

ALex had once promised her his roots were with her. He once said he wasn’t going anywhere unless with her. He made her feel safe, loved. And despite her trust issues she trusted him. And now she felt like he was a fool because all the insecurities she felt; were warranted. Because the second Izzie held a dangle of a family in front of him. He left; and it made her feel sick. He made her feel like she wasn’t enough for him. JO didn’t want to feel worthless again but she did. He made her feel so much love yet make her feel like she wasn’t enough because of how he left, and that was a whole group of acceptance she had to handle. And now she was responsible for another life; their child. 

Jo was nervous because Alex was all talk, he had taken the responsible when she told him; because Jo didn’t want to be Izzie she didn’t want to keep his child from him. SHe wanted him to know the truth and give him the option to be there for her, and their child. But she wasn’t forcing the idea. As she walked towards baggage claim she had paused in order to answer his message, she had glanced at the words and she felt a sense of security, because he did want to be there. 

“ Text” Alex 

“ She’s mad just be prepared. I’m also mad at you. But i also won’t make this from you. We didn’t plan it but here we are. We can make it work the whole co-parenting thing. I want you to be involved but I also don’t want to cause a conflict with your whatever Izzie is.” It left it open ended because in Jo’s mind Izzie was his girl; at least that’s how it felt with how easily he tossed us aside, could you blame me? No, absolutely not. I was excited for the baby our child it kept a piece of him with me, but i also felt like I was holding him with me which is what he didn’t want. I just felt torn with him.

Starting Again

@ImpudentMedico 

Complicated was the word when it came to Alex and herself. From barely speaking; from the rage of hate she felt for him. To the common goal; which was to raise a healthy child. To push aside our distaste for each other; well more so on my part. Jo knew she could’ve had it easy by not engaging by avoiding Alex especially when they first messaged after a month of him being gone. She could’ve gotten through the pregnancy on her own. She was built for it; to be alone. But one confession; one text changed the relationship she had with him. 

He was the dad; and as angry as she was with him; She didn’t want to be like Izzie; she didn’t want to keep a child from him. She still loved him; she wanted him to be apart of their child’s life even if it made her sick to see the pair had ended up. All that to say it wasn’t smooth sailing; but Jo had promised to keep him updated. To let him be there for her and their child. 

A promise she intended to keep. And that’s why Jo found herself digging into her purse when she stepped foot into the New York airport.  Stepping to the side as she listened to people chat, she found her phone letting fingers dance along the keys. 

[ Text} Alex. 

“ I debated telling you, but a promise is a promise. I’m in New York. I’ll be staying with Callie and Arizona so you know I’ll be safe.”  Not wanting to keep talking; Jo came to the city to move on from the last chapter not be dragged back into the old. But Jo also knew they had to figure out the next steps together. One text at a time. Because let’s be honest he left once; why wouldn’t Alex do it again? It was a fear; the reason why Jo was keeping him at arms length. Protecting herself. 

Slipping her phone into her coat pocket she slung her carry on over her shoulder and began to walk to the baggage claim; the signs directing her. A new Chapter; exhaling deeply Jo assured herself this was the right move for her.

[ofpowerwarrior]

The loss; the grief you feel of the future you thought you had. Jo had experienced more hurt than she cared to admit. She experienced fake love; the desperation to feel loved. But then she found the real deal; with Alex. It wasn’t a love she was looking for. He wasn’t what he appeared to be. When Jo met Alex he was the attending who was screwing all the interns; she had told him she had no interest in him. And at the time she meant it. But then she got to know him; the personality he had; the lame jokes. The way he looked at her made her feel alive. 

Jo never experienced the kind of love she felt for him. He made her feel safe; and loved. Alex held her each night; he pressed a kiss to her head each time. And she fell asleep. He was forever; we had imagined a life together. We said I do twice; we had started to think about building a future with Kids. Jo never felt worthy of love until him. And now it felt pointless; to hold onto him; to hold onto that love. And god she wished it was easy; to burn his crap; to burn that damn letter. But she had a circumstance she had to deal with. Soon after alex left for her; for his new family where he always belonged she found out she was pregnant. 

It took weeks for the brunette to admit to herself it was real. She was feeling sick; she was feeling the aches in her back. She knew it was real; especially when Carina had placed the ultrasound monitor on her stomach; and she saw the small bean; the human she and Alex made. Jo wished she was evil; wished she could let Alex go years without knowing; but she had a heart. She didn’t want to be Izzie; which is why she reached out; why she told him in a text. She was civil; she was also snarky at times; but we had an understanding. 

I was going to New York to stay with Callie and Arizona; I was going to be looked after by them. Ensure baby was healthy; ensure I was okay. I only trusted Arizona; so I had made the arrangements. Alex I made it clear I wasn’t going to keep him from our child; if he wanted to be involved he could. But he was the dad nothing more or less. He left; and I’d be damned if I let our child be the reason he came back. I was independent; I wasn’t scared to raise a child alone. The shock had worn off; and I was preparing for my move; I was on the plane ready to go. A new chapter; a new phase to move forward on. I was only civil with him when I landed; as if he cared. 

I was shocked when I found my suitcase; I had pulled it off the baggage claim; I felt my phone; pushing my arm over the handle I had glanced over the message; a hint of a laugh dared to escape my lips. 

[ Text} Alex 

“ Some people have a way of finding their way back. I’m sure Arizona will have words to say when you come by. She was far from happy when she found out the stunt you pulled. It’s a routine check up tomorrow morning with Arizona. For today I’m just moving in with them. “ Civil; I kept it simple; I couldn’t get involved; or let myself feel anything for him; not after all the pain he caused. Pushing my phone in my jacket pocket; the brunette had taken the handled; and moved her way towards the exit. A new home.

Starting Again

@ImpudentMedico 

Complicated was the word when it came to Alex and herself. From barely speaking; from the rage of hate she felt for him. To the common goal; which was to raise a healthy child. To push aside our distaste for each other; well more so on my part. Jo knew she could’ve had it easy by not engaging by avoiding Alex especially when they first messaged after a month of him being gone. She could’ve gotten through the pregnancy on her own. She was built for it; to be alone. But one confession; one text changed the relationship she had with him. 

He was the dad; and as angry as she was with him; She didn’t want to be like Izzie; she didn’t want to keep a child from him. She still loved him; she wanted him to be apart of their child’s life even if it made her sick to see the pair had ended up. All that to say it wasn’t smooth sailing; but Jo had promised to keep him updated. To let him be there for her and their child. 

A promise she intended to keep. And that’s why Jo found herself digging into her purse when she stepped foot into the New York airport.  Stepping to the side as she listened to people chat, she found her phone letting fingers dance along the keys. 

[ Text} Alex. 

“ I debated telling you, but a promise is a promise. I’m in New York. I’ll be staying with Callie and Arizona so you know I’ll be safe.”  Not wanting to keep talking; Jo came to the city to move on from the last chapter not be dragged back into the old. But Jo also knew they had to figure out the next steps together. One text at a time. Because let’s be honest he left once; why wouldn’t Alex do it again? It was a fear; the reason why Jo was keeping him at arms length. Protecting herself. 

Slipping her phone into her coat pocket she slung her carry on over her shoulder and began to walk to the baggage claim; the signs directing her. A new Chapter; exhaling deeply Jo assured herself this was the right move for her.

[ofpowerwarrior]

A new chapter; it’s what it had to be. Jo was used to moving around. When she was a kid she bounced around from foster home to foster home until she gave up with finding a permanent home. She could only count on herself. She raised herself; by living in her car, by finding scraps of food to make ends meet. Jo was used to being dealt the ugly hand; but she never wanted her child to experience what she had. Jo didn’t want to feel alone; but she also couldn’t stay in Seattle. The whispers, the stares since Alex dropped the biggest bomb on her. 

He left; he left to be a dad to his kids; kids he never knew he had until recently. Izzie the bitch the homewrecker as I liked to refer to her as. He was gone because of her. Jo was protecting her child from the harmful glances, as she started to show. And seeing as Arizona was the OB she trusted the person she wanted taking care of her through her pregnancies. It made sense to disappear; to make the move to New York. Jo had friends; Callie and Arizona had her back; and she trusted she was in good hands. 

Jo wasn’t like Izzie she didn’t keep him in the dark; even if she should’ve. She didn’t want Alex in her corner out of obligation; out of feeling he had to. He made a choice, and that was to leave, he picked Izzie. He didn’t even give her a conversation. But I know Alex; he hated he missed out on 5 years of being a dad to those years; and the brunette wasn’t going to be like Izzie. So she let it out; she told him, and she told Alex where she’d be. In new York; he had the right to be present; this was our child. The soft smile raised to bare lips as she thought the words. The plane ride was rough. Managing to sleep a few hours with the discomfort. Plus the loud movements ever 5 seconds; not ideal. But Jo managed and she had sent the message to the blonde. 

Pushing her phone into her coat pocket; it was a baggy heavier winter coat in case it was windy; but it was also a way of covering her. In case people noticed the rounder stomach; not that Jo was fully showing up; but you never know. The female stood to her feet, and with her bag strapped over her shoulder she was slowly making waves down the aisle. She felt the vibration in her pocket; probably from the blonde. Waiting until she reached the outside of the plane, she had glanced at the message; baggage claim sounded about right. 

A excited expression traced over her features. Shoes picked up as she followed each sign to the direction of the claim. People moving in each direction; Jo walked down the stairs until she spotted her. The blonde sat in one of the chairs; the baggage claim rack was clear; they hadn’t started to rolled the bags out yet. Reaching the ground; the brunette had speed walked over to the chairs. 

“ It’s so good to see a friendly face.” Words cheerful; a sense of excitement coming over her all at once.

Someone to Lean on

@anunstablepast

Changes; for Jo it was normal to move from place to place. To form a new version of yourself. She had renamed herself; she had run from situations that felt haunting. A change of pace; a new place to settle down in felt normal. Jo never saw herself leaving Seattle; she never thought she’d have to. That was until her husband left her for an ex wife and a family he apparently always wanted. And Jo found herself pregnant and alone. She had Link who was her best friend; he’s been an angle in the last month. He’s ensured she ate, and took her to the few doctor appointments she had to go to. Especially if this move was to go as planned. Arizona had requested her scans; requested a last appointment with Carina before she board her flight. It was discrete, it was a need to know basis. Only a select few knew about the brunette’s condition. Jo didn’t want to be the talk of the hospital.

It took weeks for the whispers to stop. For the stares to stop after Alex left. After he abandoned her. Jo wanted to be okay; wanted to be happy. After a month of knowing; of starting to take care of herself she was adjusting. Carina promised not to tell; and Bailey understood her choice to leave town. Meredith was in the dark; she had manage to hide a pregnancy, she managed to still low until after she gave birth. That’s what she wanted; a place where she wasn’t the girl who got left. She wasn’t the girl with a crazy ex, Jo hated being spied on; being the talk of the hospital. The stars had lined up to where she was able to leave; go under the grid, with Bailey’s support; and having a place to stay with Arizona and Callie. She was lucky; to have a way out. It took a month given how awful her morning sickness had been. Jo had finally packed; the necessary items she needed; she was a light backer. Only a suitcase; and a carry on. She might be crazy; but the way the female looked at it was.. Her body was growing; she’s gonna be growing out of her cloths in a few months; and if she forgot anything that was required; she could pick it up in New York. 

She decided not to drive herself crazy; the hardest part was saying goodbye to Link. After much pleading; her friend understood why she needed to go for herself. It wasn’t about running; because Jo knew her home was Seattle; but in order for her to have her baby on her terms; she had to escape. Alex did a number on her; he ghosted her until he felt remorse; felt the need to own up to his mistakes. Jo wasn’t intending on sharing this news with him. But he reached out a few weeks ago; and he apologized; and one heat of the moment text ended with her uttering the words. In a single text; her good heart now had her attempting at a co-parenting arrangement with him; even if it hurt her. 

She was expected to inform him she landed when her plane landed in New York. Although the jury was out on that one. She was brought out of her thoughts when she heard the intercom; the announcement that the plane was landing. Fingers gripped hold of the armrest as she felt the right landing; luckily her stomach was playing nice with her today. Within minutes people were getting up. Jo was only about 3 months so she wasn’t showing yet; and decided to take the time to shoot the blonde a quick text. 

[ Text] Arizona. 

“ Just wanted to let you know I landed okay.” 

With a quick press of a send the brunette slowly lifted herself up to her feet. Lines of people exiting; she’d patiently wait. Jo wasn’t expecting Arizona to get her; she had an uber app set in, in case she had to call for a car. One problem at a time.

[ofpowerwarrior]

Someone to Lean on

@anunstablepast

Changes; for Jo it was normal to move from place to place. To form a new version of yourself. She had renamed herself; she had run from situations that felt haunting. A change of pace; a new place to settle down in felt normal. Jo never saw herself leaving Seattle; she never thought she’d have to. That was until her husband left her for an ex wife and a family he apparently always wanted. And Jo found herself pregnant and alone. She had Link who was her best friend; he’s been an angle in the last month. He’s ensured she ate, and took her to the few doctor appointments she had to go to. Especially if this move was to go as planned. Arizona had requested her scans; requested a last appointment with Carina before she board her flight. It was discrete, it was a need to know basis. Only a select few knew about the brunette’s condition. Jo didn’t want to be the talk of the hospital.

It took weeks for the whispers to stop. For the stares to stop after Alex left. After he abandoned her. Jo wanted to be okay; wanted to be happy. After a month of knowing; of starting to take care of herself she was adjusting. Carina promised not to tell; and Bailey understood her choice to leave town. Meredith was in the dark; she had manage to hide a pregnancy, she managed to still low until after she gave birth. That’s what she wanted; a place where she wasn’t the girl who got left. She wasn’t the girl with a crazy ex, Jo hated being spied on; being the talk of the hospital. The stars had lined up to where she was able to leave; go under the grid, with Bailey’s support; and having a place to stay with Arizona and Callie. She was lucky; to have a way out. It took a month given how awful her morning sickness had been. Jo had finally packed; the necessary items she needed; she was a light backer. Only a suitcase; and a carry on. She might be crazy; but the way the female looked at it was.. Her body was growing; she’s gonna be growing out of her cloths in a few months; and if she forgot anything that was required; she could pick it up in New York. 

She decided not to drive herself crazy; the hardest part was saying goodbye to Link. After much pleading; her friend understood why she needed to go for herself. It wasn’t about running; because Jo knew her home was Seattle; but in order for her to have her baby on her terms; she had to escape. Alex did a number on her; he ghosted her until he felt remorse; felt the need to own up to his mistakes. Jo wasn’t intending on sharing this news with him. But he reached out a few weeks ago; and he apologized; and one heat of the moment text ended with her uttering the words. In a single text; her good heart now had her attempting at a co-parenting arrangement with him; even if it hurt her. 

She was expected to inform him she landed when her plane landed in New York. Although the jury was out on that one. She was brought out of her thoughts when she heard the intercom; the announcement that the plane was landing. Fingers gripped hold of the armrest as she felt the right landing; luckily her stomach was playing nice with her today. Within minutes people were getting up. Jo was only about 3 months so she wasn’t showing yet; and decided to take the time to shoot the blonde a quick text. 

[ Text] Arizona. 

“ Just wanted to let you know I landed okay.” 

With a quick press of a send the brunette slowly lifted herself up to her feet. Lines of people exiting; she’d patiently wait. Jo wasn’t expecting Arizona to get her; she had an uber app set in, in case she had to call for a car. One problem at a time.

[ofpowerwarrior]

Starting Again

@ImpudentMedico 

Complicated was the word when it came to Alex and herself. From barely speaking; from the rage of hate she felt for him. To the common goal; which was to raise a healthy child. To push aside our distaste for each other; well more so on my part. Jo knew she could’ve had it easy by not engaging by avoiding Alex especially when they first messaged after a month of him being gone. She could’ve gotten through the pregnancy on her own. She was built for it; to be alone. But one confession; one text changed the relationship she had with him. 

He was the dad; and as angry as she was with him; She didn’t want to be like Izzie; she didn’t want to keep a child from him. She still loved him; she wanted him to be apart of their child’s life even if it made her sick to see the pair had ended up. All that to say it wasn’t smooth sailing; but Jo had promised to keep him updated. To let him be there for her and their child. 

A promise she intended to keep. And that’s why Jo found herself digging into her purse when she stepped foot into the New York airport.  Stepping to the side as she listened to people chat, she found her phone letting fingers dance along the keys. 

[ Text} Alex. 

“ I debated telling you, but a promise is a promise. I’m in New York. I’ll be staying with Callie and Arizona so you know I’ll be safe.”  Not wanting to keep talking; Jo came to the city to move on from the last chapter not be dragged back into the old. But Jo also knew they had to figure out the next steps together. One text at a time. Because let’s be honest he left once; why wouldn’t Alex do it again? It was a fear; the reason why Jo was keeping him at arms length. Protecting herself. 

Slipping her phone into her coat pocket she slung her carry on over her shoulder and began to walk to the baggage claim; the signs directing her. A new Chapter; exhaling deeply Jo assured herself this was the right move for her.