officialdiegorodriguez - Tumblr blog

[officialdiegorodriguez]

Let’s dance!

[officialdiegorodriguez]

TEXTING: MARLEY Diego: I'll do my best. Diego: And tell Jess to quit being a hetero. Diego: Eat out the hot girl. Live your dreams.

TEXTING: DIEGO

Marley: just look after yourself so i stop worrying about you so much

[officialdiegorodriguez]

TEXTING: HENRY Diego: Okay.

TEXTING: DIEGO

Henry: i’m fine. really.

[officialdiegorodriguez]

TEXTING: MARLEY Diego: I know, but I'm calling me one. Diego: I'm gonna do better, Marls. x

TEXTING: DIEGO

Marley: i never called you a shitty friend

Marley: i love you too. dingus.

[officialdiegorodriguez]

TEXTING: HENRY Diego: Too late. It's in my DNA.

TEXTING: DIEGO

Henry: don’t worry about me.

[officialdiegorodriguez]

TEXTING: MARLEY Diego: Yeah, maybe. Diego: Fuck Diego: Okay. It's my turn to not be a shitty friend. Diego: I love you, Marls. For the love of God, please never forget that no matter how much of an asshole I am.

TEXTING: DIEGO

Marley: i can give you literally all the love i have in my body but i know you’re still going to beat yourself up

[officialdiegorodriguez]

TEXTING: HENRY Diego: Yeah, me too. Diego: Are you okay, Hen? Seriously. I mean it. Diego: I'm not trying to project onto you this time. I know I have to stop doing that, I just wanna be sure you've got people looking out for you too.

TEXTING: DIEGO

Henry: i want us to be happy too.

Henry: mostly i want you to be happy with yourself.

[officialdiegorodriguez]

TEXTING: MARLEY Diego: I'm not saying that you don't support me, Marls. You're my best friend. Diego: I guess I just Diego: I dunno. Tough love never really helped me all that much. Just kinda hurts. Diego: That's on me, though. I gotta quit being a baby. I know you want the best for me.

TEXTING: DIEGO

Marley: i’m not gonna fight with you

Marley: but don’t say i’m not giving you moral support or whatever

Marley: all i want is for you to be happy

[officialdiegorodriguez]

TEXTING: HENRY Diego: I know. Shit. Diego: Marley was just saying all this stuff and trying to encourage me to Diego: It doesn't matter. It's not her fault either. She just wants us to be happy. Diego: I'm sorry, baby. Diego: Fuck. And I'm sorry for that, too.

TEXTING: DIEGO

Henry: really? that’s what you took from that?

[officialdiegorodriguez]

TEXTING: MARLEY Diego: No, it's not.

TEXTING: DIEGO

Marley: it’s fine

Marley: whatever

[officialdiegorodriguez]

TEXTING: HENRY Diego: Listen, I love Diego: Fuck Diego: I loved what we had. I still do. Diego: But I kept hurting myself. And maybe you could handle it, sure. Maybe I was too weak, but I'm still hurting. I know you are too, and I'm sorry, but I Diego: I feel like I can't breathe when I'm around you, but when I'm not it's like. My chest hurts and there's this weight pushing down against my skull and it's like I'm suffocating Diego: And that's not right, because it makes me say shitty things and do shitty things and try and fucking hide behind shitty vices and I Diego: I need to sort my shit out.

TEXTING: DIEGO

Henry: really? that’s what you took from that?

[officialdiegorodriguez]

TEXTING: MARLEY Diego: What? Diego: Marley, I don't remember... Diego: I'm so confused. Diego: I'm sorry. Diego: Please don't be mad at me. Diego: Henry's mad at me too. And I know, I know. I have to do better. For myself, for both of you. But I am trying. I swear.

TEXTING: DIEGO

Marley: so?

Marley: all it takes is for it to happen just once and i’m the one that’s gonna come and get you or i find you and i have to be the one that sticks my fucking fingers down your throat so you can fucking breathe again

[two minutes past]

Marley: forget it

[officialdiegorodriguez]

TEXTING: HENRY Diego: Yeah, okay. I get it. Diego: I already know I'm letting myself down, Hen. Diego: Don't need you telling me too.

TEXTING: DIEGO

Henry: i understand if you’re not ready, d.

Henry: really.

Henry: but you were always enough for me, so don’t let yourself think it’s me that you’re letting down.

[officialdiegorodriguez]

TEXTING: MARLEY Diego: I mean it happened once or twice but Diego: I'm sorry

TEXTING: DIEGO

Marley: yeah and then you go and drink at a bar until you’re sick and it worries the fucking life out of me

[officialdiegorodriguez]

TEXTING: MARLEY Diego: What? Diego: I did tell you. I told you right away the first time it happened. When I fought with Hen and Pops, you were the one I reached out to, Marls. Diego: It's always you that I go to. Diego: I'm not trying to Diego: I don't wanna be a bad friend

TEXTING: DIEGO

Marley: then talk to me when that happens don’t shut yourself off

Marley: you’re secluding yourself you know that?

Marley: we only talk if i text you first and drag you out of this self-imposed exile you’ve sentence yourself to

[officialdiegorodriguez]

TEXTING: HENRY Diego: I get that. Diego: But I wasn't ready. Diego: I couldn't handle it. Diego: I was scared. I was weak. I couldn't do it. Diego: Maybe I projected a lot of that onto you, but it was about me too. Diego: And it's eating me up and I'm sorry.

TEXTING: DIEGO

Henry: you don’t get to decide what i can handle.

Henry: you also don’t get to decide what i deserve or what i want.

Henry: i was always happy with you, i never wanted anything more from you.

Henry: you decided i should need something more when i never asked for that.

[officialdiegorodriguez]

TEXTING: MARLEY

Diego: I’m not leaving the band, Jesus.

Diego: A little moral support because I just told you every day is one long panic attack after the other, I don’t know

Diego: Loving Henry was like breathing and I just ruined that

TEXTING: DIEGO

Marley: moral support for you deliberately taking a career dive?

Marley: damn what colour’s they sky for you right now