obsessingoverl

[obsessingoverl]

idk if i told the full story on here but i signed up for a research study where they were testing a new opioid, and it was supposed to be up to 5 injections increasing the dose to see what people could tolerate

i got the first dose and almost immediately fainted. they had to call in a whole medical team and it was a huge fucking deal

i was kicked out of the study and got a phone call later where they were supposed to tell me what the drug was, so i could avoid it in the future. they told me it was saline water. a placebo. i fainted from the placebo effect.

anyway, it's been a few months and i just got an email from the same department asking me to be a research participant in a new study: testing the effects of open-label placebo.

open label placebo is when the subjects and the researchers all know it's a placebo. they're testing the power of my mind. my power to imagine anything.

i like to think that they chose me for this specifically based on their past experience with me. "get the guy who fainted like a little bitch boy from saline water." anyway i just submitted all my info and i'm looking forward to getting started.

[obsessingoverl]

The ceaseless work of trying to love others as you wish to be loved, eclipsed only by the work of trying to love yourself as you wish to be loved.

[obsessingoverl]

hello tumblrstake/queerstake .. i am visiting utah and i was wondering if there are events for queer mormons in the next few weeks … i would love to attend somehow 🥹

[obsessingoverl]

hello tumblrstake/queerstake .. i am visiting utah and i was wondering if there are events for queer mormons in the next few weeks … i would love to attend somehow 🥹

[obsessingoverl]

Sometimes I think, "gah, I'm really annoying, and my friends probably don't like me," but then again, if I was annoying, why do they keep inviting me?

[obsessingoverl]

In my experience as a third culture kid who travels a lot the best indicator that you as a non-x is appreciating x culture is if the locals actively invite you to participate in it with them

Yes, you are allowed to buy those handmade Inuit winter clothes if an Inuk is literally selling them to you. They would not be offering you a price point if they didnt want you to buy and wear them. And you might discover that theyre the best winter clothes youve ever worn because of COURSE they would be if theyve kept this culture warm in harsh winters for thousands of years.

Yes, you are allowed to join those Cambodians in that local holiday theyre celebrating during your visit if they literally invited you to it. They would not have invited you if they didnt want you to participate. And in the process you might learn a lot about a culture you never wouldve interacted with and you can all have a laugh together about your clumsy but genuine attempts at getting your footwork right in one of their traditional dances.

Yes, you are also allowed to ask if you can participate in something from the local culture you are visiting. Sometimes you will get "sorry, thats a closed practice" but in my experience most of the time you'll get "of course, let me show you how to do this!" And in my experience people tend to appreciate when others make an active effort in sharing their culture and wont stone you to death if youre clumsy about it while youre learning. I guarantee that the local children doing all of this for the first time too make the same mistakes you do and they can tell if youre being disrespectful or genuine.

So much "cultural appropriation" discourse really starts to sound like "you cant participate or visit any other cultures if youre from a Colonial Culture and have to stay in your little box and never relate to other people"

[obsessingoverl]

In my experience as a third culture kid who travels a lot the best indicator that you as a non-x is appreciating x culture is if the locals actively invite you to participate in it with them

Yes, you are allowed to buy those handmade Inuit winter clothes if an Inuk is literally selling them to you. They would not be offering you a price point if they didnt want you to buy and wear them. And you might discover that theyre the best winter clothes youve ever worn because of COURSE they would be if theyve kept this culture warm in harsh winters for thousands of years.

Yes, you are allowed to join those Cambodians in that local holiday theyre celebrating during your visit if they literally invited you to it. They would not have invited you if they didnt want you to participate. And in the process you might learn a lot about a culture you never wouldve interacted with and you can all have a laugh together about your clumsy but genuine attempts at getting your footwork right in one of their traditional dances.

Yes, you are also allowed to ask if you can participate in something from the local culture you are visiting. Sometimes you will get "sorry, thats a closed practice" but in my experience most of the time you'll get "of course, let me show you how to do this!" And in my experience people tend to appreciate when others make an active effort in sharing their culture and wont stone you to death if youre clumsy about it while youre learning. I guarantee that the local children doing all of this for the first time too make the same mistakes you do and they can tell if youre being disrespectful or genuine.

So much "cultural appropriation" discourse really starts to sound like "you cant participate or visit any other cultures if youre from a Colonial Culture and have to stay in your little box and never relate to other people"

[obsessingoverl]

You are a fan of internationally-acclaimed K-pop group Huntrix. They drop a new single to wild success and its debut performance is canceled without clear explanation. Huntrix's management says something about a medical condition with the lead singer.

At the same time a new boyband debuts with a song that tops all the charts. The boyband doesn't seem to have a management company. Or names. Maybe that doesn't matter because their sound IS catchy. Huntrix is completely out of the public eye except for two appearances alongside this new boyband where they are there exclusively to beef. It's maybe a PR stunt. It's maybe because Rumi is exes with one of the only two named members of the Saja Boys.

People start going missing at a rate 4x the national average. You probably wouldn't even know about this except that 3 of the missing people were big names on Stan Twitter so it's kind of a big deal. There are four different high-traction posts claiming all the recent missing people were Saja Boy fans. But that's like claiming all the recent missing people drank water and breathed air.

Rumi is still on medical leave but Huntrix management is saying Huntrix WILL be at the K-pop Awards. Someone on Twitter's uncle's friend works in a recording studio and he says Huntrix is debuting a song which tells the Saja Boys to die. The exes theory gets a lot of traction. Twitter tries to doxx Jinu to confirm the theory but no one can figure out who he is. Twitter tries to doxx the other Saja Boys to the same lack of success. One account said she had "a lead" but her Twitter has been silent for 72 hours since.

Rumi is back from medical leave for the K-pop Awards just in time to have a massive falling-out and break-up on stage. This probably devastated you but you don't really remember it. The Saja Boys invite everyone to a concert. A lot of people who went don't remember going, and you'd call that suspicious except you also went and don't remember going.

Somehow no one in the crowd of 10,000 thought to record the concert on their phone. Maybe there was a "no phones" rule but usually there are still leaks. No one has any video or photo evidence of this concert happening. However you all collectively remember hearing "What It Sounds Like" at the concert (before it debuted 4 days later from Huntrix's label.) This does not make a lot of sense because this was a Saja Boys concert, supposedly. Someone says they saw Zoey impale at least one of the Saja Boys. You would brush this off as a stupid rumor but 2-dozen other people are saying the same thing and you a little bit remember it too.

There's a lot of people saying "Let's wait for an official statement from the Saja Boys" on Twitter but they've been saying that for 2 weeks now and no one has seen or heard from them since the concert. There's a lot of people saying "Zoey killed them fr" which was a joke at first and now, is not not a joke, but it hits a little different.

Most of you are kinda over SB Twitter at this point so you kind of don't care anymore but there are a few remaining fans who've doubled down on the doxxing effort to figure out if they're okay. It's not going well. One person claims to have found Jinu's identity but everyone thinks she's stupid because that guy died literally 400 years ago. YES the royal court's painting of him looks identical and yes that guy was a singer too, but come on, the K-pop look is 90% make-up anyway.

[obsessingoverl]

Multi billion dollar corporations: We make crap AI ads because we rather hang ourselves than pay an extra cent for a quality work.

Midsize art supply manufacturer: We commissioned a watercolor artist to make an illustration for every color of our watercolor palette and make it into an art book with swatches.

(Ekaterina Goland for "Old master" watercolors by Gamma)

[obsessingoverl]

I love how Kaladin is using his medical background to essentially invent mental health services from scratch.

Meanwhile Adolin just intuitively understands that petting horses and playing with swords (and, you know, being treated like an actual person instead of a semi-animate object) will fix just about anything.

Once Kaladin opens his clinic, he really should hire Adolin.

[obsessingoverl]

Scrupulosity about bellydance under the cut

I am so very, intensely, painfully aware of my position here as a white person that does bellydance for fun and the occasional tip. In 2021, an opinion article posted to The Medium said, in so many words, that white people should not bellydance. Our presence in the bellydance style is plagued with orientalism, colonialism, and comodification of another person's culture. The middle eastern people who teach it to white people are complicit in colonization.

I've been bellydancing since I was 13. My mom, a dance journalist, took me to a lot of culture fairs that center around dance and I got to see cultural dances from around the world. I saw large women doing undulations with their stomach muscles and fell in love with the fact that I could be beautiful too.

My first teacher had some connections to Turkey. She told us why, if you go to dance in Egypt, there were rules about what you could and could not do as a dancer (belly had to be covered, no dancing outside of the venue, no floorwork.) She told us that this style of dance is risqué in some of its countries of origin. She told us the many places it comes from. I am coming to this dance with a lot of knowledge.

My current teachers are insistent that we acknowledge that we are guests to this style and that we should step aside when a person to whom the culture belongs is speaking. We should uplift, and not dismiss, the opinions of people who grew up with this. We do our best to learn the folklore of the steps. I am careful not to pry into sacred dances from closed spaces. I am coming to this dance with a lot of respect.

For some people, this does not seem to matter. My whiteness means my involvement in bellydance is racist. I should not bellydance.

But I've been doing this since I was a teenager. If you put on music and I start dancing, its bellydance because that's one of the styles I grew up with and all dancing is bellydancing when you're 260 pounds.

Bellydance doesnt come from a country or culture, but from many countries and cultures. The Ottoman Empire stretched as far as Bavaria. The origins of certain styles are hotly debated (khalegy is often attributed to Iranian folk dance, but some argue that it comes from Southern India.) The names of the dances often come from descriptions given by people outside of the culture ('baladi' means 'of the country', 'raqs sharki' means 'oriental dance,' 'flamenco' means 'of the Flemish.')

Yes, some people say that white people should not bellydance. I understand this perspective.

So do we dance for their approval or do we dance for the joy we see on the faces of the hijabi in the audience who is so overjoyed just to hear music in her language being played in America? Or the woman who comes to our shows who is from Iran, where this style of dance comes from but can get you in big trouble? Or the fat person who thought she wasn't allowed to move her body in this way? Or for myself- who moves like this anyway and expresses music like this?

And perhaps it's just my experience as a dance photographer- how does anyone know for sure the country of origin of a person presumed to be white or brown? Among my dance friends is someone from Puerto Rico- she is not criticized for dancing saidi, even though it's not the dance of her people. I have a friend from Greece- she gets criticized for dancing her cultural pieces because she looks white. I think we have a fundamental misunderstanding of skin color and race and ethnicity and intentions and how all those things interact in a somewhat messy way that cant be pinned down by looking at a person.

Cultural exchange is how cultures talk to each other. Some things are kept closed and that should be respected. But when no one is allowed to interact with cultures other than their own, are we engaging in another form of racism?

This shit keeps me up at night because im trying my damnedest to honor the origins and people of the dance, but the rules are inconsistent and the goalpost keeps moving so it has me wondering when what im doing will be considered ethical enough to be part of the conversation.

[obsessingoverl]

recently came across some plates and bowls that would be perfect for a children's hospital

[obsessingoverl]

If you’re LGBT reblog and tag with your opinion on beer.

[obsessingoverl]

kaladin is moral. insufferably moral. so insufferably moral that he joined the magic order for insufferably moral people and being insufferably moral is slowly destroying his mental health. meanwhile, kelsier is like yeah i set your house on fire, what about it. talk about whiplash

[obsessingoverl]

if you think a showing off both of your hands is immodest, try diving by zero

[obsessingoverl]

Lord, have mercy on children who come from troubled homes

[obsessingoverl]

I dont normally make prayer requests on tumblr

But my friend is having a really hard time right now and I'm at the point where I'm putting his name on the prayer roll so I might as well do this too

About a month ago his muscles basically lost all strength to the point where he can't really walk and his strength is shot. (Legitimately didn't have the strength to open a water bottle) The doctors don't know what's wrong yet. I'm really scared for him

So yeah. Please pray for him.