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when i really want to treat myself i buy a fresh 2 TB hard drive, break it open with a kitchen knife and put greasy fingerprints all over the shiny part

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*goes to Coachella in a white linen suit like an antebellum lawyer, sweating profusely and dabbing at my forehead with a handkerchief* now, I’m no fancy scientist, but would you folk know where a simple gentleman such as myself could obtain some acid? Now, I’m no big city lawyer, but could any of you fine youths point a country boy such as myself in the direction of some fucking acid?

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every person ive ever suggested to that going through your partners phone not only invades their privacy but also the privacy of all the people who have possibly texted very personal things to them have acted like they genuinely never thought of that before

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by a_guy_named_eric

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“its unethical to have a child in the current state of the world” well I would argue that its never been the ideal conditions to be a human being on planet earth anywhere ever, unless you are super privileged and wealthy. and if you extrapolate this logic then what you are saying is the people living in the poorest and most downtrodden areas of the world (who are, at the same time, constantly under threat of losing their land, way of life and culture) should be the ones to stop having children The Most. and I want you to think about if maybe theres a certain ideology that would come into agreement about this.

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[exclaimed out loud while browsing the net] buxom elven shawties in my area? and they're lustful as fuckk? [narrowing my eyes, scratching my chin] [sotto] but are they ear'd up? pointed tips and all?

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Ah yes the Irish Legend of The War Over the Cow, famously fought by The Dude Who Was A Replacement Dog.

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Another sex thing radically changed by Chancellor Angela Merkel

why are dudes in fanfic always getting hit with freight train orgasms. why not an orient express orgasm, classy and romantic. where are the shinkansen train orgasms? his orgasm hit him like the TGV atlantique breaking the passenger rail speed record. like the shanghai maglev, his orgasm was a feat of engineering but something of a commercial disappointment.

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people say dolphins are smart but there not smart enough to not be Shity grey rubber tubes flappin about in the gotdamn ocean

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Michalina Janoszanka (Polish, 1889-1952) - Spring (1920-29)

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go away forever with me