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Pavel’s acting here is so fucking good. I literally felt that look of sheer relief and gratitude. He so desperately wants Charlie to continue loving him the way he has always been (the way he’s wanted to be loved and taken care of)

you have to take care of me. do you understand?

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There’s a TikTok of him pointing at his titties after they were asked the question of who drinks more milk (Pooh was voted) 🤣

gotta be honest not even Pavel saying "my thick succulent titties" with his own mouth prepared me for him to be repeatedly called mama

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I love this relationship for them so much 🥺 “Friends😉” who lift “friends” up when they don’t see other options for themselves are the best type of friends. Sailom’s brother could’ve gotten both himself and his younger brother into some bad work to pay off their debts but he didn’t. And he influenced his friend to also choose an upright life! (Despite what Kang’s evil father is about to do)

PHANUROJ CHALERMKIJPORNTAVEE as NAME & PHROMPHIRIYA THONGPUTTARUK as SAIFAH

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Thank you to everyone who got me to 250 likes!

The Leftover Kids in ONLY FRIENDS

A character analysis of Boston and Ray Ep. 6

This episode reveals a bit more about Boston’s character, and while it doesn’t justify his actions (because your past doesn’t have to justify all your present decisions, especially in fictional characters) we’re able to better understand his impulse to “humble” others when it seems to him like they’re finding their own way.

We learn that Boston’s mother remarried, and flew to another continent to start her new life. And while I don’t want to make assumptions, something about Boston’s politician father (who calls him only to speak about his campaign and winning over young people) encouraging his son’s impulses to toy with the emotions and bodies of others may have had something to do with it. Boston, time and time again tells Nick that the potential of the public finding his sex tapes (with other men) would be a burden to his father’s career. We don’t know if Boston has come out to his father, but the ultimatum that Boston must graduate or be sent back to New York to live with his mom shows his father’s willingness to get rid of a son that may not fit his public image. Boston is a talented photographer and someone in the demographic he wants to target; why so eager to send him away.

In the next scene, while comforting our favorite crazy lovesick puppy, he tells Nick, that the reason he doesn’t make lasting relationships is because he knows he has to leave anyway (and some more be about how he’d be a better photographer abroad). Maybe it’s because of the pressure he feels from his father, but Boston believes that there’s no place for him permanently anywhere. No one has chosen him for an “unconditional forever love” and no ever one will. He’s had no power over that. If my assumption that Boston’s father already knows of his son’s sexuality, and is slowly freezing him out and that Boston knows this already, Boston’s view of his future in Thailand, one that will always be queer, must be bleak. His own father, a popular candidate elect, does not want him. This loss of control triggers him. We see Boston seek control of potential rejection in the way he pursues his flings. He prefers Nick over all his other flings because he’s confident that Nick will always choose him no matter what selfish things he says. He’s envious of Mew who’s constantly chosen and pure, of the perfect Top who rejected him and has his life together, and of Ray and Sands budding relationship. He believes he’ll be left alone again, so he sabotages externally against anyone’s progress.

It’s what makes his scenes with Ray that much more interesting. Because Ray is just like him, except he sabotages internally. 

We were introduced to Ray’s family background a few episodes back, and the toll it took on him emotionally, physically, and mentally. His mother was a young and talented actress who married rich, and whose light was dimmed in that marriage. And whether it was resentment over her lost career, Post-partum depression and an uncaring husband, or just a worsening addiction that was left untreated, she died alone drowning herself in alcohol. We know that Ray did not receive much affection from his mother and that his father was just as neglectful. Ray has learned to use money to buy emotions, companionship and intimacy. Unfortunately, he seems to be following in both his parents footsteps. 

There is a theory going around that Boston has had a secret unrequited crush on Ray. And while I don’t think there’s a lot of evidence that supports this ship, it’s a plausible theory. However, the way he constantly goes back to Nick when he needs comfort and conversations, other than just straight sex, says the opposite. I think a better conclusion would be that Boston finds comfort in Ray’s lack of growth and misfortune. After all, they’re very similar. Leftover, abandoned, rich kids that were never chosen. I don’t even think he had any ill intention against Mew when he slept with Top or even with Ray. I think deep down he’s secretly comforted by seeing Ray heartbroken. It makes sense that he was triggered when he saw that Ray might have found someone to help him come out of that misery. He doesn’t provoke Mew or Top the way he does Ray. Maybe it’s because Ray doesn’t see how similar they are. Maybe it’s because Top and Mew see right through him. 

Mew’s role in their friendship is also really interesting 🤔. Ep. 7 might give us inside Mew’s thoughts and actions. Is Mew manipulating his rich friends to get his dream career and partner or is it all all a grand plan to help heal the lives of the people he cares about most.

Overall, I love how real the show feels. The discussions of drugs in Thailand’s queer community, of privilege and class struggle, it all feels incredibly genuine. It’s hot and steamy and we’ll written. Like we CAN have all of these things at once! The growth that I see in BL/Queer (the slash is necessary) content gives me hope. Please give the lesbians (AprilNamchueam) more screen time plsssssssss 😩.

(Please excuse any typos and errors.)

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I, a hearing person who likes subtitles just as a preference, shouldn't have to read a subtitle that's obvious nonsense, go back a couple seconds, and listen again in order to figure out what's going on. An accessibility feature should not be the most half-assed part of a professionally made production. Scripted media has absolutely no excuse for not having subtitles or having subtitles that aren't perfectly verbatim. Professional captioning services should be ashamed of the shoddy work that they put out. Captions should be treated as a part of the production, just like filming, editing, audio balancing, etc - and anything that releases with missing or bad captions should be seen as unfinished

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The Leftover Kids in ONLY FRIENDS

A character analysis of Boston and Ray Ep. 6

This episode reveals a bit more about Boston’s character, and while it doesn’t justify his actions (because your past doesn’t have to justify all your present decisions, especially in fictional characters) we’re able to better understand his impulse to “humble” others when it seems to him like they’re finding their own way.

We learn that Boston’s mother remarried, and flew to another continent to start her new life. And while I don’t want to make assumptions, something about Boston’s politician father (who calls him only to speak about his campaign and winning over young people) encouraging his son’s impulses to toy with the emotions and bodies of others may have had something to do with it. Boston, time and time again tells Nick that the potential of the public finding his sex tapes (with other men) would be a burden to his father’s career. We don’t know if Boston has come out to his father, but the ultimatum that Boston must graduate or be sent back to New York to live with his mom shows his father’s willingness to get rid of a son that may not fit his public image. Boston is a talented photographer and someone in the demographic he wants to target; why so eager to send him away.

In the next scene, while comforting our favorite crazy lovesick puppy, he tells Nick, that the reason he doesn’t make lasting relationships is because he knows he has to leave anyway (and some more be about how he’d be a better photographer abroad). Maybe it’s because of the pressure he feels from his father, but Boston believes that there’s no place for him permanently anywhere. No one has chosen him for an “unconditional forever love” and no ever one will. He’s had no power over that. If my assumption that Boston’s father already knows of his son’s sexuality, and is slowly freezing him out and that Boston knows this already, Boston’s view of his future in Thailand, one that will always be queer, must be bleak. His own father, a popular candidate elect, does not want him. This loss of control triggers him. We see Boston seek control of potential rejection in the way he pursues his flings. He prefers Nick over all his other flings because he’s confident that Nick will always choose him no matter what selfish things he says. He’s envious of Mew who’s constantly chosen and pure, of the perfect Top who rejected him and has his life together, and of Ray and Sands budding relationship. He believes he’ll be left alone again, so he sabotages externally against anyone’s progress.

It’s what makes his scenes with Ray that much more interesting. Because Ray is just like him, except he sabotages internally. 

We were introduced to Ray’s family background a few episodes back, and the toll it took on him emotionally, physically, and mentally. His mother was a young and talented actress who married rich, and whose light was dimmed in that marriage. And whether it was resentment over her lost career, Post-partum depression and an uncaring husband, or just a worsening addiction that was left untreated, she died alone drowning herself in alcohol. We know that Ray did not receive much affection from his mother and that his father was just as neglectful. Ray has learned to use money to buy emotions, companionship and intimacy. Unfortunately, he seems to be following in both his parents footsteps. 

There is a theory going around that Boston has had a secret unrequited crush on Ray. And while I don’t think there’s a lot of evidence that supports this ship, it’s a plausible theory. However, the way he constantly goes back to Nick when he needs comfort and conversations, other than just straight sex, says the opposite. I think a better conclusion would be that Boston finds comfort in Ray’s lack of growth and misfortune. After all, they’re very similar. Leftover, abandoned, rich kids that were never chosen. I don’t even think he had any ill intention against Mew when he slept with Top or even with Ray. I think deep down he’s secretly comforted by seeing Ray heartbroken. It makes sense that he was triggered when he saw that Ray might have found someone to help him come out of that misery. He doesn’t provoke Mew or Top the way he does Ray. Maybe it’s because Ray doesn’t see how similar they are. Maybe it’s because Top and Mew see right through him. 

Mew’s role in their friendship is also really interesting 🤔. Ep. 7 might give us inside Mew’s thoughts and actions. Is Mew manipulating his rich friends to get his dream career and partner or is it all all a grand plan to help heal the lives of the people he cares about most.

Overall, I love how real the show feels. The discussions of drugs in Thailand’s queer community, of privilege and class struggle, it all feels incredibly genuine. It’s hot and steamy and we’ll written. Like we CAN have all of these things at once! The growth that I see in BL/Queer (the slash is necessary) content gives me hope. Please give the lesbians (AprilNamchueam) more screen time plsssssssss 😩.

(Please excuse any typos and errors.)

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okay. fuck. i need to talk about be my favorite. because jesus christ, this might be THE smartest show currently airing, which is a miracle at a time when la pluie is also airing.

so, this episode we learned more about kawi's and pisaeng's family backgrounds, and oh boy, is there a lot to unpack there... and it all works to explain why the original timeline was the way it was, why everything turned out so fucked up for both of them in the beginning.

(very rambly thoughts under the cut)

first of all, it's important to note how much of an impact kawi's father's death had. it was always clear that this was a traumatizing event in kawi's life, literally the first thing he did when he went back in time was to ditch the (supposed) girl of his dreams so he could be with his father, tearfully hug him and tell him "i love you, dad".

now, we're learning that after his father's death, kawi completely gave up on himself. he literally didn't see any reason to pursue a better life or his dreams because his father would never get to see it and be proud of him. i think this also explains to some extent why kawi has so much trouble accepting help from others: he has internalized the idea that he somehow has to do everything on his own, so his father (and others) can be proud of him. it's interesting that kawi obviously loves his father a lot but they're not really close: they don't see each other very often and in the first episode, it's established that they don't usually talk to each other about their feelings, either.

so. everything else that happened to kawi in the og timeline (knot making fun of his singing, pisaeng "stealing" his spot as pear's secret buddy, his falling out with max, kawi being too much of an introvert to make any new friends at uni) was compounded by the fact that after his father's death, kawi saw no hope for himself any more, and he ended up alone, isolated, friendless, depressed and deeply unhappy.

and now that we're learning more about pisaeng as well, it's becoming clear that something similar happened to pisaeng in the og timeline as well, only for him it was not a single event but more the reality of him being gay and having a crush on kawi (come on. nobody can tell me he DIDN'T crush on that cute awkward nerd as soon as kawi dropped his lil notebook in front of the seniors on the first day of uni), but kawi never even speaking to him and completely ignoring his existence... while pisaeng's own mother was adamant about pisaeng staying as deep in the closet as possible because it's bad for her political ambitions to have an out gay son. she basically tells him "you can feel whatever you want to feel but telling people about it is something that you should only do with my permission".

so, pisaeng has been getting told by his mother to stay in the closet since he was 15 years old (JESUS!!!), and since his crush is obviously unrequited and hopeless, why should he risk anything by being honest about it? his family is rich, pear's family too, their marriage is one of convenience for pisaeng, who gets to keep living his good life while placating his mother and spending his life with a person he's friends with, even if he can never love her romantically. from his mother's perspective, pear and pisaeng must be a good match, and pisaeng has no real reason to fight any of it. because coming out as gay would do nothing but cause him trouble and make him unhappy.

but in the new timeline, kawi is there as pisaeng's friend. and pisaeng falls for him so much deeper than he ever could have done in the og timeline. and now he HAS to figure himself out, HAS to confront his own queerness, not for kawi or even with kawi (utterly brilliant choice in the last episode to have pisaeng go on this journey alone!) but for himself, because it is becoming clear that he is living a lie and that he can't go on like this. having kawi in his life changes everything for pisaeng -- even if they weren't in a bl and were simply friends, this storyline would still be incredibly compelling because even while they're not in a relationship, kawi and pisaeng keep challenging each other, keep changing each other, keep making each other better, more honest people.

when they're in bed together and kawi asks why pisaeng likes him, he says much of the same stuff he's said before: that pisaeng is better, richer, more handsome than him, that he can't understand what pisaeng sees in him. but he says it differently this time, not with anger or defiance like in the beginning of their friendship, but so honestly, he's able to open up to pisaeng in a way he never could before just because he has had pisaeng in his life and they have had an impact on each other.

i keep coming back to this because it's something i rarely see in stories and bmf is doing it AMAZINGLY. both of the protagonists go on a journey of growth and self-improvement through knowing each other, they literally make each other better. and even though kawi is not at a point where he can see them as equals, he can honestly talk about this now, can voice his feelings of insecurity in a way he was never able to before -- and so, pisaeng can say, well, i think you're cute, does there have to be anything more to it than that? he doesn't try to talk kawi out of his self-perception, merely states his own perception of him in a way kawi can't argue away. i think this is a smart writing choice because kawi has to accept that pisaeng finds him cute, he can't say "no you don't" without accusing him of lying.

and oh, my baby kawi being so incredibly deep in denial is tugging at my heartstrings. there's a very interesting parallel happening with kawi's singing, something he was obviously dreaming of as a career when he was a child but completely gave up on -- until pisaeng and pear helped him gain confidence to put himself out there once again. i think something very similar is happening with his sexuality: he has shoved the truth of himself so far back in his own mind that it takes a long time and the knowledge that pisaeng is into him for kawi to even entertain the thought of maybe also being into him maybe. there's a certain safety in that, just like there's safety in having pear there while he reads his song lyrics to a room full of people. and that's not a bad thing! this show has consistently shown (and outright told) us that people need to help each other, that literally no one is capable of making it on their own, that everyone deserves love and support. and kawi needs a lot of love and support to be able to even let himself think of pisaeng in romantic terms. i am seriously excited to see what happens next, now that kawi has crossed the line between them, now that he got a taste of what he could have if only he let himself.

there are probably a million things i haven't said that i can't think of right now. but every single episode leaves me more impressed than the last, the story is written SO well and presented in such a smart way, later revelations recontextualizing things we already know, and with every week, everything makes more and more sense. and learning more about their families really explains a lot about all three of them (god, i haven't even mentioned pear's rich upper-class alcoholic father, a lot to unpack there as well!), and how they got where they were in the og timeline as well as in the current timeline.

thanks for reading 😘

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He looks so cute and pouty and doe eyed 🥹like a baby deer so adorable give him to me pls 🤲🤲

episode 8 preview

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I had a bad feeling about Pisaeng's mom from the moment Max said he likes the things she says and Pisaeng made that face. And refused to acknowledge any connection to her despite the shared last name! (All Thai surnames are different so Max knows they're related for sure)

But wow. Most of her employees are from that community. She can take it. She has political aspirations and an apparently progressive outlook. She used "crafty talk" to force her son to stay closeted when he expressed any form of queerness as a teenager.

This is so insidious and speaks to the reality of performative allyship. Max, a queer character who is tired of the terrible state of the world, expressed admiration for this woman. Only for the show to tell us people in power are never what they seem.

On top of everything, she uses her "employees from that community" to spy on her son. They tell her when they spot him at a queer space. Pisaeng was certainly aware of the surveillance.

People with power and privilege using members of our own community against us is nothing new. Marginalised communities often face this. Reminds me of the concept of the Native Informant in postcolonialism.

The silly little time travel show is saying big things about kindness and honesty, yes, but also about politics and policing.

GMMTV's Home School explores some aspects of this too. Where the trauma ridden kids are supposed to police each other's behaviour or all of them get punished.

And we cannot discount the fact that Thailand just delivered a resounding vote against authoritarian politics in favor of the progressive Move Forward Party in May elections. But for nearly two decades Thailand’s military rulers have used coups and court rulings to keep elected opponents out of power.

I got invested in Be My Favorite despite myself since the second episode but now I'm intrigued by it like never before.

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Be my Favorite Review

So far… I’m Obsessed

This might be my favorite Thai BL show on par with Not Me and I Told Sunset About You. Crazy Right? No!

“You want to go in the water, but you’re scared to dive in?”

What a beautiful metaphor by our favorite handsome prince Pisaeng.😍😍😍

Reasons why this is the quality of shows I want to see in the future?

The acting in this is professional and amazing. There’s not a single time where I watch Krist and Gawin together and get pulled out of the story because of unprofessional acting. This feels like two (the rest of the cast as well) seasoned and experienced entertainers putting their best foot forward. The chemistry is sizzling, they bring the characters to life in a unique way; it feels fresh, hot and new. (They look SO good together)

The pacing is wonderful. Especially related to the equally interesting and thought-provoking plot. It is really difficult to do sci-fi or fantasy in a way that’s not over complicated, but the way they set up the flash back and flash foward timelines is clean and engaging.

I’m on episode 7 now and I can’t believe I didn’t catch Kawi’s slow descent into alcoholism. It’s good to want to make changes in your life, especially if you are a coward like Kawi is, but skipping the necessary steps and work (by way of time travel nonetheless) will only magnify the toxicity you never worked on to the future and hurt others in the process. (If you are someone who says they feel normal, or most themselves while drinking, stop drinking now. You are on the path to alcoholism and substance abuse. Some people are not affected, but many are. Relying on this crutch will bring unsavory effects in the future.)

I love how forward thinking and queer it is. I love Max’s character so much. I hope they don’t use him as the magical flamboyant gay that only gives advice because he’s an amazing character in his own right 

Not can NOT be there.

Pear is my Queen Goddess.

Pisaeng deserves the world.

God bless Kawi really. If anyone needs a time traveling device to fix their life multiple times, it is that loser no matter how cute he is.

P.S. Kawi just really needs a therapist. 

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So good! Their acting is so realistic and heart fluttering.

THE EIGHTH SENSE eps 3&4 + hands

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Update: I watched it and as cute as it is when neurodivergent people fall in love (aka I can live vicariously through them), with the way Japan treats the feminist movement and these very important issue that they bring up in the show (in very creative ways actually it’s hilarious), I can’t help but to think it’s still marriage propaganda with the way they mention the laws that oppress women but shift blame by putting it on the individuals not the government to foster change.

I’m glad they found each other and made it work. I’m happy she continue to stand her ground at work and with her husband. I’m glad he was not only an active participant but was also doing a the work and emotional labor and thinking on his own. (Even if that’s the bare minimum) They did what they could in a government that will not acknowledge how the patriarchy and unfair labor affects both men and women, but this is not the reality for most of not everyone else.

It’s the way I felt about the Korean Netflix Drama Love to Hate You (that show felt way more insidious especially with what’s going on in Korea right now with the feminist movement), cute and sexy leads but stop trying to set the feminist movement back decades. (Did you see that scene when Yoo Teo accidentally drops the object in his house, and he makes that adorable face, such a distraction. I’m ashamed🥲) Because of this I will pass on a full review and continue to review things that foster creativity and innovation. Onwards comrades!

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Love this!!

In the last two episodes Ae Ri:

Clocked that Ji Hyun is gay and something is going down between him and Jae Won

Slyly gave Ji Hyun a bunch of couple photos by casually uploading them in a group photo dump

Loudly pretended to pursue him in front of others to give him cover

Kindly warned him that he is being really obvious about Jae Won and others will pick up on it

Declared her loyalty and friendship and gave him a safe place to talk about Jae Won and be himself

And honestly she seems ready to throw hands if anyone bothers him. What more could you ask from your token straight bestie ally?

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ME:

"This is too embarrassing. It's like I've been seen through"

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I need to stop watching shows with arranged marriage, unintentional co-habitation, end-of-the-world, contractual marriage tropes or I’m going to really lose my mind to the point therapy where won’t help anymore.

Anyways…

Full-time Wife Escapist analysis coming soon..

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This is why I hate it when people say stuff like “oh, (this progressive thing ex: gay marriage in Korea) will never happen in my lifetime.” I understand and acknowledge the sentiment behind the original intention of the statement, however, the way that people use it now (as an excuse to not fight for change) has got to go.

People will always fight for their right to exist! Rightfully so! This is human nature and the only way we can grow and make life better for all.

축하합니다!!! Let’s push until the end!!!