novocainenightmare

[novocainenightmare]

writing tip #3436:

don't stress about your first draft. don't stress about your second draft. don't stress about your third draft. don't stress about your fourth draft. you may stress about your fifth

[novocainenightmare]

briefly forgot that porn was a thing and googled "doctor sex" looking for the tf2 meme. big mistake

[novocainenightmare]

I’ve made this post like six times but it still fucks me up the China’s mountains just look like that. Like I spent decades thinking it was stylistic but no, they just have different mountains over there.

[novocainenightmare]

I love this.

[novocainenightmare]

Poverty IS a policy choice. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

[novocainenightmare]

"Absolutely no one comes to save us but us."

Ismatu Gwendolyn, "you've been traumatized into hating reading (and it makes you easier to oppress)", from Threadings, on Substack [ID'd]

[novocainenightmare]

you don't ovulate. liar

interesting. Sort of a neutral statement really. cant seem to figure out how to respond to this

[novocainenightmare]

🪶💧19 Quail Chicks Drinking on a Hot Day💧🪶

[novocainenightmare]

cop interrupts gathering of people giving food to the homeless in san miguel, buenos aires to push and beat them around, promptly finds out that actions have consequences

[novocainenightmare]

"Are you more of a family or career oriented person?" Babygirl im a bed oriented person. Snork mimimi

[novocainenightmare]

hold on something just happened

[novocainenightmare]

one of the funniest things abt this white collar job so far is that i get to see how fucking long people take for the tiniest things. "please paste this text into a separate document and send it to me whenever you're able to this week" i mean shit, man, i know what it's like to take weeks for a 2 minute task, but that's wild even for my standards. like yeah i can probably find the time to press the copy and paste buttons sometime this week

[novocainenightmare]

when I was a little kid at some point I got upset with my parents because I didn't have a crucifix in my bedroom and they did- I was like why do YOU get to be safe from vampires??? you're okay with me getting my blood sucked???? so we took a little trip to the catholic store but the one closest to us was run by a group of nuns that had been moved here from romania. I got a little baby pink cross and this sweet old nun was like 'aww, is this a baptism gift?' and I was like no. I need to be protected from vampires. and she immediately got SO serious and was like 'this is the best one we've got, you'll definitely be safe' and since she was literally from vampire land I was convinced she was like, van helsing. like the whole time my parents had been laughing about how cute my fear was but she literally Knew dracula and was taking my concerns seriously I held this over my parents for so long lmfao

[novocainenightmare]

still thinking about that r/hypotheticalsituation post where someone was like "what if a potato chip spawned somewhere randomly in the world. and every hour the number of potato chips at that location would double. and the only way to get rid of them for good would be to eat all of the potato chips before they doubled again." and someone calculated that it would only take like, 48 hours of people ignoring a weird pile of potato chips before an absolutely irreconcilable number of potato chips was blanketing a city.

and then people were like "no wait if it spawns randomly in the world, it's highly likely it would be in an ocean" and then people were debating whether there were enough small fish swimming at the surface in the open ocean that would be able to eat a potato chip and thus save humanity from the potato chip apocalypse.

[novocainenightmare]