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Advanced Magic (1919) by Magical Ovette aka Joseph Ovette.

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if you hired a galapagos finch as a linecook it would perfectly evolve a beak to optimally smoke cigarettes behind the dumpsters

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Sometimes I think about how satisfying it is to be writing lyrics to parody a song, and have your syllables and meter match up just right...

And then I think about how Weird Al has probably enjoyed this feeling thousands of times over his life, and I understand how he's such a friendly and happy dude. Good for him, he deserves it.

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Atomium

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Also shout-out to the Swedes for just borrowing the French "adieu" into their vocabulary and just spelling it "adjö"

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*day after october, the weary pumpkin gives a great sigh before collapsing physcially and emotionally from the sheer psychological strain*

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did you know they started printing contrasting words on either side of sweettarts? like bold and calm, local and gobal, head and heart? i did not, so you can imagine how startled i was to look down while eating my discount candy and see this:

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i hate viruses so fucking much. literally getting attacked by a fucking shape. a concept. consumes no energy. responds to no stimuli. its only existence is to fuck with you. like fuck offf

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god I love learning languages. I love that feeling you get when you start to recognize words. I love that feeling when something that was pure gibberish before, when you would hear people speak that language and think "how can those be words? how do others understand this, and speak it back?" and then you start learning, and you start speaking and listening and somehow over time you too can understand.

learning a language is like watching a child grow. at first, they're just stumbling around, mimicking but not really understanding. and then they grow a little and hone skills and grow a little more and hone different skills and then suddenly one day you look at them and think "when did you grow so much? I swear you were an infant not that long ago."

I started learning spanish April 2022. This year, I'm taking a spanish literature class. I walked in the first day understanding everything the teacher was saying... learning a language is so slow and methodical that you don't realize that you understand until... you understand

I started seriously learning mandarin 18 days ago. when I tell you the euphoria that I get when I watch a c-drama and can catch basic words like 也 (yě) or 有 (yǒu) when three weeks ago that would've been gibberish, or at least just blended together with the rest of the language.

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When Katya said “Of course we’re in love. That’s why i tried to shoot you.” And Goncharov said “If we really were in love you wouldn’t have missed.” 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫

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To all the very sweet girls out there. I hope your heart is well. Don’t forget about yourself

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Follow me

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I could be ur angel… or ur devil