not-wizard-council-aristocrat

[not-wizard-council-aristocrat]

Bag of Hand-Holding: functions as a normal bag of holding, but whenever you reach in there's a 50% chance that something unseen gently takes you hand in a comforting embrace.

­

[not-wizard-council-aristocrat]

There was a young man from Peru

Whose limericks stopped at line two

[not-wizard-council-aristocrat]

HOT SINGLES DOOMED BY THE NARRATIVE IN YOUR AREA!!!!!!!!! CLICK NOW!!!

[not-wizard-council-aristocrat]

[not-wizard-council-aristocrat]

Guppy!

[not-wizard-council-aristocrat]

[not-wizard-council-aristocrat]

[not-wizard-council-aristocrat]

So I was pushing the happy button on the couch the other day in a pretzel-like position as it my want.

And I did something and moved a certain way as to lock up the muscles under my left scapula. Just fucked my shit right up. Migraine for a day and a half.

Anyway. I fixed it lat night with a roller and some effort, but like. Now my back is made of spicy ground beef sourced in hell.

Anyway. The point of this post is to be careful and stretch thoroughly before you go off buzzing your friendly zones like a circus performer in the buff.

Next time you might not be able to get up and you'll have to explain why you're nekkid and why you inexpertly threw your toys across the room in an attempt to hide them before help arrived. And also why there's olive oil everywhere.

[not-wizard-council-aristocrat]

sometimes i wonder how a writer would describe me if i were a character in a book

[not-wizard-council-aristocrat]

I took Grim in to for a solensia shot, because she’s been a bit of a slug this year…….and it had zero effect! so good news, she doesn’t have arthritis. bad news, she is just a slug.

[not-wizard-council-aristocrat]

it is an honor 2 be in ur computer

[not-wizard-council-aristocrat]

in need of something fun and creative and harmonious to do this week. what is an online group activity we could all be doing together. i want to feel the warmth and benefits of human group interaction

[not-wizard-council-aristocrat]

[not-wizard-council-aristocrat]

i’m at the psychiatrist and there’s a woman wearing a sweatshirt that says, “i’m voting for the felon” and just. are they not embarrassed? how are they not not humiliated to walk around and advertise they don’t give a single shit about anyone but themselves? they scream “FREEDOM OF SPEECH” when someone calls out on their hate, but they don’t seem to realize freedom of speech protects them from the government, not from me.

[not-wizard-council-aristocrat]

[not-wizard-council-aristocrat]

umm i need reassurance that my presence is wanted but i can’t ask for reassurance because that’s really Embarrassing and it wouldn’t feel genuine if i asked for it