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4yo (from in the bathroom): “DADDY, I POOOOPED!” Me: “Ok.” 4yo: “IT WAS JUST A LITTLE ONE!” Me: “Ok.” 4yo: “I JUST POOPED A BIG ONE!” Me: “Ok.” 4yo: “NOW MY HANDS SMELL BAD BECAUSE I WIPED MY BUTT!” Me: “Ok.” 4yo: “BUT DON’T WORRY, I WON’T LICK MY FINGERS!!” Me: “Ok.”
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4yo: “May I please be excused from the table to show you my crocodile stance?” Me: “YES YOU MAY!!”
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