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friday the 13th is happening yet again this year folks and this time it's during october.. and isn't that the sexiest thing

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‘’yall need to chill’’ says me, who isn’t chill, not even a little bit.

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[me internally while someones talkin to me] wow they Really Think i kno wats goin on rn…

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I got a rainbow bracelet and I said ‘haha look its gay like me!’ And my step mom flipped out and started saying “UMMMMMM Its a bracelet???? It can’t be gay, things CANT be gay”

Did I strike a sensitive, hetero nerve Pamela? lmfao

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when ur mom randomly freaks out on you for no reason

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if ur rich and feel like spoiling a total stranger on the internet u need to speak tf up

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I walk this lonely road. in my bag, i have a giant toad

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sometimes i scroll through stephen king’s twitter and i’m never disappointed

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do you think that mosquitos dare their friends to bite somebody with bugspray on

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if you wake up while McDonald’s is still serving breakfast then you’re doing good

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"When you're in your bee suit and you feel sweat running down your back, that's fine. If you feel sweat running up your back, that's a bee"

-Some beekeeping advice my mom gave me today

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