ninajyu

[ninajyu]

It makes no sense and so much sense at the same time. I can't believe I fell into the vest trend. Adidas Samba Janes. The humor and dare I say cunning of the Lord still tickles me. To be who God called you to be and no one else! Does the bob calleth? Copenhagen taught me that cities can be designed for citizens to make good choices and that quite frankly, American cities are largely constructed for unhealthy, perhaps even lethal, decisions. It was also shocking to return and, as if for the first time, see how truly and stunningly pervasive corpulence is. A list of things for this year's birthday hehe. The garlic and black pepper almonds from Trader Joe's are addiiiiicting. Would it feel different if this was elsewhere? Everyone's in Italy. The power of a good chili oil is borderline profound. Let it slide off. Giving people their flowers. The story of Joseph. That peak state where there are no split thoughts, no kinked feelings, no internal discomfort, only certainty that when the words I trust You are said, they're wholly true. It's interesting but moreso disappointing and heartbreaking to see what happens when the times get rough. Short chain fatty acids. A love that is of utmost intimacy.

[ninajyu]

The only thing that seems to really make sense this year is Dua Lipa's Chanel ad. Health is more time with the kids, it's energy, it's a life force, it's the ability to be lucid and level-headed, it's a wealth that can't be given but easily taken away, it's the strength that flows, not trickles. The person I've become over the last four years isn't the person I once was, which would be fine, if it wasn't for the simultaneous truth that it isn't who I want to be either. Well, that really didn't work out. I've learned the most about humanity. Regenerative farming. I don't want to play the game, I want to tune in and manifest the Jesus way. Yes, let's try a spray tan. Dual citizenship aspirations and summer in Europe dreams. An outpouring of Your spirit. Inner Excellence is so drenched in fundamental Christian tenets that it feels like plagiarism. Tea, santal 33, letting go and making space, trust. It's only Wednesday and the fluctuation since Sunday is humbling.

[ninajyu]

My tolerance and immunity towards pastries, carbs, and dairy in Europe really makes me wonder what poison is in American counterparts. Also, they do vegan cheeses SO much better there--how sly and quirky is that. The amount of personality and love in the kids is a treasure. There's no other way to describe this rendition of "Shout to the Lord" other than heavenly. Maybe I’m not as comfortable in my own skin as I’d previously thought or like to think. It's peeling myself away from the true but limiting thought cycle of what could have been better said in retrospect. Perhaps this is what is was, when I sensed the tides changing. Strength. I don't like who I am without You. Community, community, community. Help me, Jesus. Sweat it out. For special days, you eat special things. Spy thrillers but episodically paused and fast-forwarded, then rewound to watch again in real time after ensuring nothing scary's happened OR played on mute with my eyes covered over everything but the captions. So... Inner Excellence?

[ninajyu]

Book Review Haikus 82-85

Like Water for Chocolate by Laura Esquivel

I was team John Brown Surrounded my aromas Sprung from page to page

The Friar and the Cipher by Lawrence and Nancy Goldstone

Informative is How I'll remember this one And thesis delayed

Beyond Ivy Walls by Rachel Fordham

Finished to finish Sometimes closed an eye and cringed Maybe for the young

Lincoln in the Bardo by George Saunders

Cried way too early! Magnificent, heartbreaking True triumphant prose

[ninajyu]

Thankful Thursday 228

The generously kind librarian who has come through for me twice now.

[ninajyu]

The October cycle was one for the books and maybe it was the turmeric easing some of the November PMS. London, Cotswold, Oxford, and mostly any place in England. Soup season! Lord, I pray. The power of protein. I still think this $10 milk frother's the best purchase I've made in a long while. That personality of inquisitiveness, knowledge, rumination, and appreciation. I've wanted to watch Wicked since its trailer release, but the unnecessarily incessant marketing almost dims my interest. Still Twisters! Lying by omission is still lying. The DGAF is so strong that I wonder if it's actually burn out. When will I learn once and for all that Candy Crush is never the move. Gotta fix this right MCPJ and arm. To stay close to my lifeline, Christ.

[ninajyu]

Book Review Haikus 77-81

The Fourth Wing by Rebecca Yarros

Indulgent teen read Catalyst to read again Jaw dropped at the end

The Iron Flame by Rebecca Yarros

Prose became quite dull A gnawing finish cut deep 2025

The Pearl by John Steinbeck

A tragic detox Though the end is perhaps known The truth still pained me

The Crucible by Arthur Miller

Ask, already read? Our humanity History repeats

Fates and Furies by Lauren Goff

Every now and then Prose that cut like sharp razors Furies more than fates

[ninajyu]

The priest said, It is pleasant to see that your first thoughts are good thoughts. God bless you, my children.

—The Pearl, John Steinbeck

[ninajyu]

This luxury of time, and the most rare jewel of them all, feeling that time is passing slowly, has been debilitating. But it's also making sensate the parched gardens of art, literary theory, and cultural enlightenment in my mind. Cue commentaries on Areopagitica, and the reflection of works from a period where expression itself was being questioned, tugged, ransomed, and experimented with resulting in every letter, word and associated phonetic stewarded with utmost care because it mattered.

Most urgently, the need to travel has never felt so necessary as it does now. And I know where I want to travel--places rich in history, where both the pastoral and urban exist, where reverence for tradition still exists even if it's in traces or standing not because of its fundamental significance but because of its economic pull for the today that it inhabits.

[ninajyu]

How do you help bring out someone's inner light? Their sparkle? Their sine qua non? Low glycemic index foods. This botched haircut has taught me enough. Reading again. Hard to chalk it up to jet lag at this point; maybe it's my new norm. A cap is a double edged sword in this heat. I've found a new focus and it's crazy how so much of my consciousness has rallied and disciplined the rest of my body towards it. Funky sunglasses. I felt achingly bored yesterday and I can't remember the last time I felt that. Here's a hot take question, is collagen powder integration into baked goods a scam? Protein breakdown occurs at temperatures lower than oven temps typically used for baking :o Pilates, my body thanks you. Humor and sleep, two of the best medicines.

[ninajyu]

And just like that, it's autumn. Help me live for You, all the days of my life. Maybe it's true that your taste buds change every seven years... I still really want to watch Twisters. Lilly, Noah, Ezra, and Celine. It makes zero sense but perfect sense at the same time. T-t-tingles knowing The Great British Baking Show will be back. I really really need a vacation to a foreign destination and when I think that, I wonder how my parents have gone so long without one. How is it Wednesday?! HOW?! Level 6 and 7, connection and flow. Are we into asymmetrical tops? The logic is illogical.

[ninajyu]

It's summer! IT'S SUMMER!!! I need to keep reminding myself of that. The answer is easy. Megan Boni lmao. Will I turn into a Hufflepuff? There is a very specific square neck corset bustier top I am looking for. Paul Mescal, I am obseeeeessed with you. Taking an undetermined pause from Bach, the Bridgerton soundtrack, Paula Abdul, and Celine Dion. Green juice and pilates, don't @ me. It creeps up when least expected and maybe that's how it will be for a while. Prayers up to the highest of heavens and to the depths of the soul. Everyone is deserving of big love. So much respect for the mail carriers in this heat! All that we need, He is. Fleece shorts. It is so challenging to do even the smallest thing right now. The Olympic trials have been chef's kiss muah muah muah.

[ninajyu]

Have passport, will must travel. Back strengthening. The Dior Book Tote Club. Day 3 of caffeine weaning was day 0 of Advil which was a promising sign and not getting coffee on a 6am flight, well by George. Does makeup function as a protective cloak from further sun damage? Turns out, the vibes mattered. ~Golden Mind~ Did someone say... raw vegan cheesecake? Tiredness comes in all different shapes and sizes. "Wealth." I watch one SNL skit from 7 years ago and all of a sudden, I only see semi-vintage SNL skits in my feed which either suggests that I consume that little YT or the algorithm is of the obsessive kind. Acupressure yay or nay. Booooooks.

[ninajyu]

There's nothing quite like seeing, hearing, and witnessing how accepting and supportive children can be. They are capable of understanding and feeling such big things, we just need to be patient enough to explain it to them and listen to them.

—random social media post

[ninajyu]

Thankful Thursday 227

That mom and baby were safe. That I arrived home in one, unharmed piece. That I remembered to book my pilates class this morning. That somehow, my phone battery lasted the whole day. That there is tomorrow, where I will I will I will make cinnamon rolls!!

[ninajyu]

Thankful Thursday 226

For who is God, but the Lord?     And who is a rock, except our God?—

—Psalm 18:31

But I was a sobbing mess with the whole psalm, no doubt

[ninajyu]

Thankful Thursday 225

Over a year since the last one, which is telling in some way. Today:

My mom's voice when she answered the phone this morning

The reminder that making this decision is a privilege

The purity of Luke 16:10

How the sweet and sour tofu bowl showed UP. Aaaaand the miso coconut cream mushroom uDON~!

Finding out the difference between toothpaste fluorides

Lé resistance band

The smell of garlic cooking