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happy october 3rd

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I used you get so pissed in high school when people said “these are the best years of your life” and when I saw graduation memes that said “congratulations on finishing the best part of your life.” That’s pathetic and depressing as hell. I’m only 22, so I can’t and won’t pretend to have some sort of sage knowledge about the later stages of life, but I know that college has been a hell of a lot better than high school ever was. My brain is more developed, to start off. I cut out toxic friendships and have the bravery and insight to cut out toxic family members. I have a fuller understanding of my mental illnesses and am on a healthy recovery track. I am taking some (not all) classes that actually interest me. I am becoming a better person. And I hope it doesn’t stop here. There’s so many “best days of your life” to look forward to.

The days I live in my first apartment.

The days when I have my first job.

The days when I am married

The days I live in my first house.

The days I am a parent.

The days I am a grandparent

The days when I have a super strong understanding of who I am.

The days when I discover I don’t enjoy my job anymore, and switch into a new field, because you are allowed to do that in your 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, 60s, whenever.

The days when I am surrounded by love and friendship.

The days when I have the time, money, and resources to help other people.

So please, spare me this youth-worship BS. Don’t tell me life goes downhill a quarter of the way through.

Life doesn’t end at 23. 30 isn’t old. Fetishising youth as the ultimate desirable characteristic in a person is actively harmful to both young and old people. Some of us lost our teenage years to abuse and recovery, and can only begin living when we’re at a different life stage.  Literally knock it off, the lot of you.

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It wrinkles my brain that Jupiter’s moon Europa has oceans that are sixty miles deep, while Earth’s oceans only reach seven miles deep at most. I’m willing to bet good money that there’s life in Europa’s oceans. Like five bucks. You hear me, NASA? I bet you five bucks that there’s life on Europa… Now that there’s money and reputation on the line, I bet they send a mission there real quick.

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a concept: future jake and amy having a kid BUT amy goes into labour on halloween and jake has to figure out if amy is cheating him out of the heist or if he’s actually about to have a kid

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remember in goblet of fire when minerva says ‘potter’s a boy, not a piece of meat!’

imagine harry telling her everything after the battle of hogwarts, telling her about how dumbledore raised him like a pig for slaughter, and how he had to die and mcgonagall gets so goddamned mad

she loses control for the first time that harry’s EVER seen and she’s actually yelling, she’s so pissed that harry was seventeen and he had to accept death and dumbledore KNEW he would have to die and NEVER TOLD HIM

and harry’s about to cry because yeah his friends would be devastated if he was gone but NO ONE got this damn pissed that dumbledore had raised him so that he could die at the right time and mcgonagall’s in the middle of a rant and he just shoots up and hugs her and she’s stunned into silence but after a moment she hugs back and it’s great

and then she goes up to her office and starts screaming at dumbledore’s portrait because ‘i don’t care if it had to happen, albus, he is a CHILD-’

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I want villains who go against the stereotypical bullshit that “evil cannot love” or whatever.

I want villains who spend months in their creepy dark lab building the death ray with their best buddy and hug each other when the superweapon is finally complete.

I want villains who fall madly in love with the other evil prince or princess they married to consolidate their power.

I want villains who tell bedtime stories to the little clone they created to be the successor to their throne and order their minions to get the clone a cup of warm milk because she can’t sleep.

I want villains hanging out with their best friends and acting like dorks while they bowl with their enemies’ skulls.

I want villains who are both evil and real, and real people have friends and families and loved ones.

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i still can’t get over the fact that you don’t need parental permission to be in the triwizard tournament, but you do to go into the next town

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Please allow this gifset of Jeff Goldblum holding a tiny sleeping puppy to bless your Dashboard.

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Percy Jackson: son of a beautiful, intelligent, selfless, and flawless god who’s been nothing if not an amazing parent to him

and Poseidon

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Schitt’s Creek || The Rose Family

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This was the best non-political sketch of the night!

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I just kind of love how people are like “omg Incredibles 2 has swearing and alchohism it’s so dark and obviously meant for adults” like y’all, Brad Bird films are like this.

The first Incredibles literally had a man attempt to kill himself

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When in doubt, go to the library!

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macaulay culkin was forced into his career by his father through manipulation, gaslighting and humiliation as well as physical abuse. at fourteen, instead of hitting him back like his father demanded, macaulay called the police and put a stop to the suffering that he and his family were facing. when his parents went bankrupt, macaulay offered up his own money to his mother and siblings and stepped up as the father figure to his five younger siblings. he’s publicly supported lgbt and pro-black charities for decades (x, x) and dedicated a good two pages of his book to naming conservatives and abusers that he hates. he risked his own reputation to defend michael jackson in court and treats michael’s daughter, paris, like his own. macaulay culkin is an amazing person whose made all of us happy over the years, and 2018 WILL be the year we repay him by supporting his hipster lifestyle website.