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We've already invented a "time machine".

It's called a clock!

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Join us Gaud! Join us!

the microbes. they are chanting to me from the dirt

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cake recipe but i've never read a cake recipe or baked one

In the spirit of hashtag cottagecore and all that, I shall impart knowledge to you, my maggots, on how to bake a cake. Except I've never baked a cake (just licked the bowl or stirred it maybe 12 years ago) or read a recipe for one. BUT HOW HARD CAN IT BE?

Ahem.

Ingredients

1 cup of sugar

2 cups of wheat (flour?)

1 slab of butter

2 eggs

1 cup of baking soda

Uhhh what else could you possible need OH RIGHT

3 tablespoons vanilla extract

I guess this is vanilla cake now idk

1 tablespoon salt

Water? Maybe? Water. Water is essential for life, life is essential for cake, therefore water is essential for cake. Boom. Logic.

1 teaspoon milk.

Instructions

Pour the wheat into a big bowl and grind it with a pestle or your fists

Add water if you can't grind it, you useless thing

Add the slab of butter to make it smooth as waxed loins

Keep grinding (#hustleculture)

Add a tablespoon of salt for Flavour and one cup of sugar (powder it or whatever) and fold it in (I learned that phrase from Schitt's Creek)

Pour 3 tablespoons of vanilla extract and the milk.

In a separate cup crack the eggs and whisk them into a semen adjacent fluid

Fold it into the big bowl. Add water for texture.

Mix it all together. Pour the baking soda in.

Swirl the bowl so it gets nice and bubbly

Put the entire thing into an oven and set it at medium heat (whatever that may be) for 2 hours.

VOILA! Garnish with frosting. Idk mix more sugar and milk together for the frosting. Add sprinkles for gay.

AND YOU HAVE A CAKE!!!!! You're welcome. If you try this, I'd love to see it. If you don't, well, COWARDS.

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I am Abdul Hamid, and this is my mother. The circumstances of the war wanted to destroy my dreams and my mother’s dreams, that I should complete my studies and become successful, compensate my mother for her years of trouble, and benefit myself and society. I hope you look at us with mercy, and this is my university degree. Help me complete my dream and on the path to my success. Help me, even if just a little. Or help me get our message to the donors💔💔🇯🇴I note that my father died when I was one year old💔😔😭and my mother and I’s dream is to live a decent life and complete my education. Please help me 😔

https://gofund.me/e01da0d2

✅️Vetted by @gazavetters, my number verified on the list is ( #332 )✅️

Please stop harassing this account

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"do you want women competing against trans athletes" yes? I also want women competing against male athletes. and competing alongside them. because segregating sports by gender is extremely shitty actually?

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So I had a funny dream the other night.

It involved a very gay witch.

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Water Lilies painted by Claude Monet (1840 - 1926)

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Wtf is a "ricecocker" though?

rice is the perfect food and westerners should eat more of it i'm so serious

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