neverthelesstheinvisibleelf-blog

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fucking hate it when the stuff everybody says "actually works" does actually work.

hate exercising and realizing i've let go of a lot of anxiety and anger because i've overturned my fight-or-flight response.

hate eating right and eating enough and eating 3 times a day and realizing i'm less anxious and i have more energy

hate journaling in my stupid notebook with my stupid bic ballpoint and realizing that i've actually started healing about something once i'm able to externalize it

hate forgiving myself hate complimenting myself more often hate treating myself with kindness hate taking a gratitude inventory hate having patience hate talking to myself gently

hate turning my little face up to the sun and taking deep breaths and looking at nature and grounding myself and realizing that i feel less burdened and more hopeful, more actually-here, that i am able to see the good sides of myself more clearly, that i am able to see not only how far i have to grow - but also how much growth i have already done & how much of my life i truly fill with light and laughter and love

horrible horrible horrible. hate it but i'm gonna do it tho

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The Shape of Ideas

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I read 16 books, 5 comics and 1 Master thesis (of a friend) this year. After years of barley managing to read books at all this feels like an incredible win. It's not like I ever stopped reading but I feel like I finally can count reading as a hobby again without lying. I reclaimed my passion. And it feels awsome

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My latest cartoon for Guardian Books

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i will say this as a person who is not white: i think being called racist as a white person is like way lower stakes than anyone makes it out to be. and like, the reality is that white people have an inflated sense of anxiety about what being called Racist Means when like. let's be fucking real for a second. it does not meaningfully often result in Material Violence to a person for being "called racist." and I think being racist is just a thing that happens. and like if we are going to say that being accidentally racist from time to time is something that like, is relatively low stakes, that has to go hand in hand with being like. ok well I guess i should take some time to think about why someone might think I'm racist and like Do something about that.

like I think the paranoia and anxiety about how Being Called Racist is something that Does Violence to People is rooted in a white guilt racialized anxiety and if I am going to be real with you I do not think it is based in material reality. you can be a little uncomfortable it's not the end of the world. i think it's frustrating as a racialized person to see so many white people more frantically hand-wringing over the prospect of being called "racist" than over the prospect of Being Racist. it's annoying to say the least.

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I know that Caleb and Essek were both playing the long game and trying to manipulate each other prior to the cease fire, but it’s still very funny that these two highly intelligent wizards went ‘Ah, yes I will beguile him with my many spells and knowledge of the arcane to trick him into thinking he can trust me.’

And both of them fucking idiots that they are fell for it.

And then doubled down and said ‘But what if you could actually trust me? What if I used my spells to actually flirt with you? What if I stopped in the middle of a battle to pull you from underneath some rubble and you pressed your forehead to mine? What if we called each other partners for the next seven years and had an engagement portrait painted and hung in our home?’

Like I don’t know if you failed at the first step or succeeded.

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Annual reblog of the liminal spacemas from instachaz

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unreliable narrator but it's just an aromantic writing romance

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every so often, i think, and it might be so selfish of me, but i crave to be someone's first choice. i want to be the person that someone sees fun things to do and their first thought is to ask me to go with them. i want someone to be willing to inconvenience themselves a little bit sometimes for me as i would do for them. i want to be looked at in a list of people and to have someone pick me out of all of them. i want to be held at the same level as a romantic partner in terms of effort and closeness. i want someone to want me as much as i want them, even though it's not in a romantic sense. i want to be important to someone.

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For those not tapped into Australian politics, King Charles is in Australia to conduct his "historic first tour to the commonwealth realm" i.e visting countries that King Charles is supposedly a monarch to.

Indigenous senator Lidia Thorpe had requested an audience with King Charles for weeks prior to this visit, she wrote countless letters to speak to him. Unlike other commonwealth nations and other former Brisitish colonies, a treaty with Indigenous peoples in Australia was never formed. Their land was never ceded to the British Crown. After being denied and ignored, Lidia Thorpe, draped in a traditional possum skin cloak, stormed in the Great Hall during the reception for Charles at Parliament House in the capital shouting the following:

I literally can't even look at these photos without getting goosebumps.

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hey man I found a piece of your soul stuck in the text messages of old friends you don’t speak to anymore. do you want it back

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cat racing ... more like catsitting

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Is it difficult making archery sexy?

Not really! In fact, the difficult part is making archery platonic

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lady trent memoirs were literally so right for putting pictures. put more pictures in fantasy books they’re so fun and useful for those of us who can’t picture shit