I wanted to make this post because we donât see a lot of asexual characters in western media and despite him being from a hugely popular show (Seaside Hotel) youâre unlikely to know of his existence if youâre not from Denmark.
His name is Hjalmar Aurland and heâs one of the more sympathetic and realistic asexual characters Iâve seen. He lives in a time and place where asexuality as a concept doesnât exist yet so heâs never labeled as such but rewatching the show made me realize that he acts exactly like the asexual people I personally know. Asexuality can mean a lot of things but his specific brand isnât naive to sex nor is he repulsed by sex, sexual desire or thoughts simply doesnât come naturally to him.
He can be convinced to have sex with his wife Helene but only if she appeals to their emotional bond. Just so you donât get the wrong idea, heâs not being forced or emotionally blackmailed to sleep with her. Itâs simply that he understands sex is a way to show emotional love too and he wants to express that love for Helene when itâs important to her, and seeing as sex isnât unpleasant to him, just kinda boring, heâs willing to do that for her.
Unfortunately that isnât enough for Helene and despite her love for Hjalmar she starts an affair with the dramatic and emotional actor Edward Weyse. He has a string of relationships, marriages and divorces behind him because despite what it may look like from the outside Edward doesnât really want shallow sexual relationships. He just canât help himself and keep falling in love with women left and right, fully and wholeheartedly, only to be dumped or dump them once the initial excitement has passed.
So Helene and Edwardâs affair that was only meant to satisfy their carnal desires quickly becomes romantic. Helene feels torn between him and Hjalmar who she still loves and Edward understands the difficult situation theyâre both in while also feeling jealous of Hjalmar. And Hjalmar? He doesnât catch on for years. Heâs not stupid but his brain just doesnât jump to sex. He just assumes theyâre good friends and why shouldnât his wife be allowed to have friends, even male ones? Things get really complicated when Helene gets pregnant and she has to have sex with Hjalmar so he wonât wonder how it happened. Edward even has to join in on the seduction, reminding Hjalmar how much Helene loves him, even though it breaks Edwardâs heart to do so.
But like Iâve said Hjalmar isnât stupid. He saw the signs but chose to ignore them until one night when Helene accidentally says Edwardâs name. It breaks the dam in Hjalmarâs denial and he has to face that deep down he always knew. Overcome by sadness and betrayal he wanders off into the night in nothing but his nightgown and gets a room at a different hotel where he can think in peace. Eventually he agrees to return to the first hotel with Helene and Edward and decides to take control of the situation.
He sits them both down and tells them that he understands that the three of them share a bond and that there are things he canât really do for Helene so from now on he wants their relationship to be open and honest. He wants Helene and Edward to keep seeing each other and Edward is welcome in their house, but Hjalmar wants to be allowed to call Edward by his first name and makes it very clear that Helene and Edwardâs children âbelong to himâ because he still thinks of himself as their dad and loves them as his own children. Both Helene and Edward agrees to it, though the emotional Edward is very flustered and confused by the acceptance and love heâs being shown by Hjalmar.
This is obviously a very tv drama situation but I was so stuck by how much Hjalmar acts like my asexual friends. Having a lover for your partner isnât the most common solution but itâs an idea Iâve heard a lot of asexual people be open to under the right circumstances and of course thatâs the most dramatic solution for a romantic tv drama.
Hjalmar is defined by so much more than his sexuality though. His main characteristic is his passion for social justice and equality, and other than some early show weirdness before they really cemented the characters, Hjamler is the only character who floats freely between the men and women. Heâs just as likely to sit with the men as he is the women, often appearing in otherwise entirely female spaces. Itâs never questioned or even brought up, not because heâs a âsafe asexualâ but because he cares and think their worries are as important as the menâs. Heâs often called a pessimist by the other men when in reality he is determined to be hopeful and compassionate and spread the love he feels the world is lacking as WWII draws closer.
So yeah, I just wanted to share this sweet ace guy with you because you probably wouldnât have known about him otherwise.
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legolas:
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đž: @cupsandthoughts on Instagram & Tumblr
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The Swedes came up with the expression first and I assume the Danes thought that sounded really scary and decided to name the most stressful time of day after it.
In all of Scandinavia twilight is seen as the most magical time of day. That's why Scandinavian horror and fantasy is sometimes called Scandinavian Twilight. It's not named after the Twilight books/movies but rather Scandinavian folklore.
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Whoever put Lyrics to âFighting in the Marketâ from the Merlin soundtrack deserves a medal.
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