nature-ismy-escape

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i’m only on reddit for r/Kevin

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The switch from Daylight Saving Time to Standard Time which will take away my glorious hour of daylight in the afternoon and give it to the early morning is just another example of how Morning People are an oppressive class in modern society

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One of my favorite D&D gags that I ever came up with is part of a oneshot I've run a few times where the party is hired by a young wizard to help clear out a few active security measures in a tower that the wizard inherited from her old teacher.

The first obstacle to be cleared is the re-animated skeletons that the old wizard was using for gardening help. It's a pretty straightforward fight, but during the encounter, players may notice one particular raised bed of herbs that is set back in a corner of the garden by itself.

Upon further investigation, this one raised bed is absolutely shining with magical protections. There are runes carved into the wood of the bed, gemstones inlaid in the top of it, this bed is absolutely protected out the ass... and an arcana check shows that the protections are all pointed inward, attempting to keep what's in there from getting out.

What's growing in that raised bed, you may ask? What is so dangerous that the old wizard felt the need to place all these protections?

Mint.

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Mom : Why are you late coming home?

Me :

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dead boy detectives not getting to be 20 episode long seasons like doctor who or supernatural where they have episodes just doing shit is so unfortunate because they could have done an episode where they have a case involving cowboys and we could have got charles in a cowboy hat listening to country music and using a bad southern accent

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I looove when food is in a bowl. Frequently plates are being brought out and I’m thinking this could’ve been a bowl meal but nobody gets it

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A co-worker of mine was standing outside with me during a break from customers to share a cigarette with me, and told me about how he had lost his brother that he was close with some years ago. He told me about how they used to be in a band together with some friends, and how ever since he'd died, he hadn't played any music because he'd been too scared and anxious. I told him about how I'd lost my brother to suicide some years ago.

I went home and pulled out an old tiny wooden box my brother had given me before he'd died. I'd been using it to store guitar picks I'd collected over the years, including one guitar pick that used to be his. I haven't played the guitar since he'd died, my hands are too small to play some of the chords, so I play bass and piano instead.

I went to work the next day and gifted my brothers old guitar pick to my co-worker. I told him that it'd been sitting in a box for ten years unused, and would probably sit there for longer if I kept it there. Told him that I thought he deserved to have it, because I bet he could put it to better use than I ever would. Told him I didn't feel like it was coincidence that me and him would cross paths with each other in our lives, and that it seemed suiting that we had these similar experiences but split in two halves. That somehow, I felt like he was meant to have the guitar pick. I told him that I knew he'd not played guitar since his brother died, but that if he ever decided to play again one of these days, maybe he'd be able to honor both of our brothers by using that guitar pick.

He almost cried. He thanked me. Then he went home that night and for the first time in years he played the guitar.

I don't know what the meaning of life is or what my purpose is, but I do believe that love and human connection is one of the most important things in life. It's finding ways to tell strangers you love them and share experiences with others. I think it's all just about love.

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free museum trips are wasted on unappreciative middle schoolers. let me go

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Happy spöök

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my wife just sent me this,

I feel like deadpool would do a pregnancy test for jokes and panic when it comes back positive bc he doesn't know pregnancy tests come back positive if u have ball cancer

I can't stop thinking about it.

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Identical. Absolutely Identical.

☹

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but the fact that Niko helped create the Lost and Found department in the afterlife BECAUSE she met Edwin and Charles. It exists because of them, and their friendship with Niko. Im fine. Totally fine.