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YIPPIE, HEAD PATS!!!

Btw every single person that sees this post gets head pats

You can't negotiate out of this you will all get pated

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Takes a bite out of you

O-oh... umm... could you like... put it back?

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Sniff sniff sniff

You smell nice...

Eats you

Sniffs you

Sneef snorf

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Thank you, wise birb god. This shall be written in the scriptures and carved into the walls of our tombs for years to come... excluding the last one

Oh wise birb god, what is thyen holy wisdom?

Don't buy extended warranties, many small changes over an extended period is better than one massive change, drink plenty of water

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PASTA!!!! ANY TYPE OF PASTA!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mmmmmm I want pasta now... icdo however fear um missing the joke but oh well

Is there a better category of food than bread+nonbread?

I doubt it

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Watching yourself get replaced hurts, but I hope they find someone who will give them the things that I couldn't provide them. It hurts, but I'm OK with it

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Nah, you gotta pay me for that, $100 upfront

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weve all got the homie who deserves to live in a kinder world

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they should invent an existence where the sweetest, most thoughtful people you've ever met don't suffer an endless series of indignities and injuries at the hands of gormless, self-obsessed monsters

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1 more major inconvenience away

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You've got free will. You can just walk around. Go outside. Roam around the forest. Make a pattern in the mud. Eat a dandelion. You don't have to worry about others for a while. Breathe some air. You've got this.

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And then I want someone to find me years later after I'm covered with moss and vines and stuff

I wanna lay down on some moss and then just never get back up

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Sometimes, it really feels like I'm invisible to my friends unless they want something or I message them multiple times. It's really annoying...

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you should reblog stuff you like