nagaficat

[nagaficat]

Deirdre had never even heard of mochi until recently but that does not stop her excitement over learning to make something new. She has not even begun gathering the ingredients yet but she is already thinking about gifting her new creations to her sons.

Sylvain's arrival to the kitchen adds to the excitement even more. She has always liked Sylvain. He might not be one of her own Black Eagle students but he has always been kind to her. What could be better than spending time cooking with someone she cares about?

"Lord Sylvain, how lovely to see you!" She smiles warmly at him though a faint blush spreads across her cheeks. "You are too sweet to me," she adds with a soft giggle before making her way behind him to tie up his apron properly.

It is a simple gesture but she is happy to do it. She never had the chance to share the kitchen with her own children. Seliph had been far too young and, even if she had been able to remember the cooking and baking skills instilled in her during her youth, there was never a need or reason to do so with the twins. It is an opportunity she wishes she could have shared with them all but, perhaps, some day.

"Have you ever made anything like this?" The apron strings are tied into a big bow. "It will be my first time but I am sure I will be able to figure it out."

it's time for some s-mochi-n! haha got it? smooch and mochi? please laugh

closed starter for @nagaficat | +1 axe

[nagaficat]

Deirdre hums, an amused smile playing across her lips. "Are you sure? You had been quite insistent that green was my color when we first met." She still has yet to test out his theory. It is not a color she had ever gravitated toward aside from her love of the outdoors but there are far more pressing matters currently.

"But of course I have heard of such a thing!" She reaches a hand outward toward one of Darios's newfound little friends and lets them hop into her palm. It looks up at her, eyes wide and waiting. Could it really be so simple to bring her own true love back by kissing a frog? "If you open any story book, there will be a tale of a prince cursed to this fate."

The frog gives a ribbit and hops from Deirdre's shoulder when it realizes she is not going to lean in for a kiss and lands on Darios's shoulder, peering over into the book he is studying with him.

"And you? Are you hoping one of your new little friends turns out to be your true love?"

love for the loveless || deirdre & darios

anniversary prompts '25 // faith +1

[nagaficat]

The opening of an Augury here in Fódlan is white nostalgic to Deirdre. She remembers the very first time she had ever visited one. She did not need to, of course, by that point she had already given her heart to Lord Sigurd and they were married. There was no reason to divine what her heart might be feeling when it was obvious to anyone who might see them together. But, oh! She did love hearing it announced that she was married to her Sigurd!

It made it truly feel real hearing someone else say it. Whether that was the Augury or someone calling her Lady Chalphy. It was real and not just a beautiful, wonderful dream.

She does not need to see an Augury now, either. She knows her heart has been split down the middle and torn apart. She knows her love for both of them is equal and even. But it is easy to become swept up in the excitement of students hoping to have their love lives divined. If it is not a joy she can experience herself, well, at least she can watch the faces of others light up when they learn of their fate in love.

Deirdre smiles when she runs into Lyn here. It had been a similar meeting for the two of them before. An enchanted grotto that reflected the one their hearts most desired. A coincidence that they run into each other like this again or perhaps even fate.

"Battle forecasts?" Deirdre shakes her head with an amused smile. "This is an Augury. This is where you will learn who your heart truly desires. Ah but, Professor, Lady, just Deirdre. I do not mind which title you use."

broken looking glass

[nagaficat]

Anniversary Wanted Prompts!

- axe: I just think it's cute! I think cooking with Deirdre is cute! With Sylvain!

- reason: thinking about going in on that s+ reason grind but also I think the draw of a hot spring in the woods would pull her in for the nostalgia of her forest dwelling days. The demons is just extra fun. With Dario's!

- faith: her fairy tale princess ass would love this. I don't think she's here to kiss a frog herself but she's cheering you on if you're trying. The magic of true love is so powerful! With Tine!

- authority: I don't have a lot of ideas but you could teach her class better than she could with Mercedes!

- flying: let's snow white this shit with erk!

Plotting or dms is fine!

[nagaficat]

"No, please, sit." She scoots over on the bench and pats the seat of it next to her. A symbolic gesture since there had already been plenty of room but she wants him to know that he is welcome and wanted. "I do not want to be alone."

As much as her heart aches to know what happened, she is ultimately grateful to know it. As much as it pains her to think about her darling son going through this, she is glad he is here with her. He is all she has right now and she will never stop loving him.

"I wish I had the answers you seek." She looks up at him, finally willing to meet his eyes again. They remind her so very much of her own. "But, if I am here, there may come a day when you can ask him for yourself. I, too, have more than a few things I would like to ask him, including this." Her smile is forced but, as she squeezes his hand, it becomes more natural. As terrible as things have turned out, her son, her Seliph, will always be a source of light and joy.

"Thank you, Seliph, for telling me."

Don't Be Seliphish

[nagaficat]

Jugdral beach scenario

8-28-2025

[nagaficat]

"I..." Deirdre sinks down in her chair, feeling very much like the child she once was, scolded for wandering too far away from the Spirit Village or staying out too long past dark. She does not look up from her cup of tea, too intimidated by the Nordion's piercing stare. Her voice grows quiet. "I was told..."

But that was Lachesis's point. That she should not need to be told. Perhaps she is right but it has been everyone she cared for that told her this was necessary. Her husband. His closest advisor and her friend. The soldiers that kept her safe. Each one of them reassured her that this was what needed to be done.

Even her grandfather told her she did not need to concern herself over politics. Her husband would make the necessary decisions. Her son--because there was never any question that she would not bear a son--would pick up that torch when he came of age. There was no reason for her to think about it.

Deirdre is quiet. Contemplative. She stirs her tea to break the silence, spoon clinking against china as she idly adds more sugar cubes than she actually prefers.

Deirdre does not know what to say. Everything she thinks feels wrong. She could cry out that she lost everything that day, too. Perhaps not her life but her friends, her husband, her son. Even the hope that she might one day learn who she was or anything about her past burned to ash that day. But she stays silent. It does not feel fair to argue under the harsh stare of Lachesis's eyes when she knows she had suffered too.

"It does not matter, does it? You have already decided what I did." It is easier to stay quiet and follow the lead of someone else.

He Teaches Symbology at Harvard!

[nagaficat]

"The whole teapot!" Deirdre's laugh is merry. It is quite amusing and she is, honestly, impressed with the other woman's preparedness. Even if there is only one cup! Perhaps she should start doing something similar. There is always someone interesting to meet around the monastery and what better way to become acquainted than over a cup of tea.

"I am from Grannvale. Verdane originally. But I have been here for quite a number of years now." It is still shocking to think of just how long she has been here living this new life. So many new friends and memories and, even though it has only been for a few moments, she knows already that she will be glad to count Elena among their numbers.

"If there is anything I can do to help this place feel more like home, please let me know. I know it can be difficult sometimes to adjust. It is lovely here though and I know you will end up loving it!"

traumatized mother's club || deirdre & elena

[nagaficat]

She is not used to worrying over Julius like this. As much as she had to fret over him as a child, that had been different. He had been by her side and her magical prowess had given her the confidence that she could help him. Thinking about him away from her, a grown man, and off on some important mission leaves her with an anxiety that she is not used to.

She sighs and leans back in her chair. At least the warm spring air and the sun on her cheeks serves as a bit of a reprieve, if only for a moment. It is her favorite season, full of new life and new beginnings. Small miracles blooming with each plant beginning to sprout.

A voice calls out to her, kind and warm with a cheerful smile to match it and Deirdre does not hesitate to offer the other chair at her table.

"Please, sit! I wish I had thought to bring tea!" Her smile mirrors Elena's. "I do not think I have seen you around before, have I? My name is Deirdre, a professor for the Black Eagle House."

traumatized mother's club || deirdre & elena

[nagaficat]

Four years. Deirdre knows, intimately, how long that is. Even if it had been longer, for her, four years is how long she has been able to remember this other woman.

It is difficult to watch Lachesis struggle to keep her composure and hold herself together. Deirdre has always known her to be a pillar of strength. She would like to be able to be strength for her now, to pull her into an embrace, but she remembers how quickly Lachesis had recoiled when they first touched. Instead, Deirdre tries to focus on the comforting warmth of the teacup in her hands.

"So you were there. I had hoped..." Deirdre remembers that day vividly but it had been difficult to focus on much besides her Lord Sigurd. The way his voice cracked in agony and desperation as he called out for her. The way he pulled and struggled trying to break free of his captors to reach her. There were other faces too, mixed with fear and hurt upon seeing her but she had hoped her memories had tricked her and, perhaps, some of her friends had been spared. "But you are here now. We both are here now."

Lachesis does not ask, does not accuse, but Deirdre still feels the need to explain. "I could have stopped it. If I had remembered anything, I could have explained the truth if my memories had not been stolen." Her hands tighten and shake slightly against the teacup. "He would have listened to me. He would have spared everyone if I had the memories to ask him."

She does not think about the way his eyes remained harsh and cold that day. Or the way he refused to grant her wish for just a little more time. She tries, desperately, to forget that it was the only time she ever felt frightened by him in all of their years together. If she stops to consider it for too long, dangerous thoughts about his motivations threaten to swallow her and her hopeful happiness whole.

"We, all of us, lost so much."

He Teaches Symbology at Harvard!

[nagaficat]

"Oh he was!" Deirdre sighs wistfully, absolutely delighted that Lapis is able to understand the heart of her once love even with her sharing as little as she has. "But not only would he just look after me or even just our son, he was like that with everyone. If he is out there somewhere now, watching over me, I know he would see our friendship and look after you, too. That is just the sort of man he was. I do not think there could ever be anyone quite like him."

She cannot keep her eyes from wandering toward Lapis's wish as she writes it down. She cannot help it! She is curious! If Lapis truly did not want her to see it, surely she would have gone somewhere more private. And it is a beautiful wish, one that Deirdre thinks should be shared.

"Between our wishes, I think the world will become a lovelier place!" Deirdre rolls up her wish and secures it inside of her lantern so they both can set them out to sea.

She stands there quietly for a moment watching their hopes join the rest before turning to Lapis. "We shared a tradition from your home and now we are sharing a custom from this land where we currently reside. Perhaps next time we meet, I might share something from Jugdral with you. But, for now, I am sure your dear love is waiting for you. I would not like to keep you too long!"

a wish goes far

         ⤷   ethereal ball 2025:  second half.

[nagaficat]

"Yes," she bows her head. There is an air of complexity that surrounds them now, even if she does not hold his past against him. She had not realized it was something he still held onto. She only hopes that he will hear her words and believe them.

"And so does my loyalty to you, my friend." She lifts her head with a smile. That is what they are, is it not? Friends.

Things may be complicated but she still cares about him dearly. He is someone she has been able to depend on. He is a piece of home here in this foreign land. Regardless of anything that has happened, she is grateful for him.

"Thank you for always being here for me, my lord."

End.

"Well, yes, that is true." She tilts her head curiously. It almost feels as though he does not believe her but, no, that cannot be the case. They are friends. They have been friends for years now. He should know she would not lie to him. "Back then, when I told you that, my rescue was the first thing I could remember."

She has lived two lives now, perhaps even three if this miraculous awakening in Fódlan was also to be counted. It has been a struggle trying to weave everything together into one cohesive story.

"But if you are asking how I came to be in Belhalla to begin with, I am afraid I do not know." Her face falls and her eyes look down. It is not something she likes to think about. Whenever the thoughts come up about what might have happened to her, she pushes them back down deep where they cannot bother her. This might be the first time she has spoken this out loud. "I was taken just outside of Augusty. That was in 759. Lord Arvis did not find me until 760. I have no memory of anything in between. I do not know what happened to me during that time or how I found my way to the capital."

She looks up at him with wide, fearful eyes and her voice drops to a whisper. "I do not think I want to know."

[nagaficat]

Nothing useful. Deirdre cannot help but wonder if that means Lyn might already know who her heart desires. She hopes so. She may not know this other woman well at all but she does know that she deserves happiness and love. As much as she would like to pry, she does not, settling for a silent prayer instead.

"If you do not mind, I would like the company. I worry that, if I linger too long, I will not want to leave." Her smile is forced. Mournful.

It would be so easy to sit by the edge of the grotto and become lost in its reflection. To weep and laugh and speak aloud everything she has been aching to share with her first love over the years she has been without him. She knows it is only a reflection but a reflection is still more than she had before she came here.

"Let me see him for just a moment more and then I will walk with you back to the party."

One day, he will find her again. She has to keep believing this. And when he does, she will reach out and feel the warmth of his cheek against her palm instead of the cold water of an ocean grotto.

End.

IF I DIDN'T HAVE CHEESE EVERY DAY WOULD YOU STILL BE INTO ME

[nagaficat]

He snaps at her and she snaps back into reality.

She loosens her hold on him but does not drop her arms. Not fully. He is no longer the little boy she would carry about on her hip from place to place but she can still support him if he becomes unsteady. He is bigger now but she is stronger, too.

"Julius..." She looks him over, eyebrows furrowed with worry, for anything she could immediately heal. "Are you hurt? Are you ill?" He never was the healthiest child when he was growing up and it was very rare that she was ever far from his side. She was his caretaker then and she will gladly resume that role now.

"I am here. You are safe," she whispers softly. "Nothing will--" she stops when her eyes meet his forehead.

She remembers a brand. A horrible brand. She remembers the way her blood itched and crawled as if trying to claw its way out of her veins when it appeared in the middle of his forehead. It had been the very last thing she saw as she told him she loved him for the last time.

It is no longer there.

"You are alright. Let me take you to the infirmary. Or somewhere more private. I am here, Julius."

you, who made me this way. { julius/deirdre

[nagaficat]

Deirdre looks up at the night sky full of twinkling stars and smiles. To imagine her lost loved ones up there keeping silent vigil is truly lovely. With so many of them shining above, it would be impossible to ever truly be alone.

"That is beautiful." She turns back to Lapis, still smiling. "I am not from Elyos and the constellations here are different from those on Jugdral but I wonder...do you think it is possible that my Lord Sigurd is still up there watching me? I want to believe it."

She takes a slip of paper and slowly begins to write 'happiness for everyone' in a slightly messy, loopy script. "My wish for happiness extends to you, too, my friend."

a wish goes far

         ⤷   ethereal ball 2025:  second half.

[nagaficat]

Deirdre sits across from her and pours tea for herself. She finds herself wondering if Lachesis has seen anyone else yet. Has Nanna found her? Or Ares? Perhaps a bit more selfishly she wonders if she might have run into Seliph yet, too. She wants to ask. To see her friend's face light up with the joy of family. But Lachesis surprises her with a question she is not sure how to answer.

"How old? I..." She has not thought about her age. Has not considered her birthdays here to be the same as birthdays in her last life. It has felt different but, now that Lachesis asks, she wonders if it even is. "I suppose if you were to count the years I have spent here in Fódlan, I will be turning 36 on my next birthday." Her voice is quiet. She knows this answer will be perplexing.

She drops a sugar cube into her tea and watches the water swirl and she stirs it. It is easier to watch this than the thoughts that will surely be swimming across Lachesis's face. It is the best she can do to give her friend a private moment to process information that must be overwhelming.

"Though I suppose I might ask the same of you." Slowly, she lifts her eyes to meet her friend's once more. "How long has it been for you since you last saw me?"

He Teaches Symbology at Harvard!

[nagaficat]

"Yes," Deirdre agrees, trying to validate some of what Lachesis is feeling. While she does not understand exactly, she does know how overwhelming it can be sometimes. "I have been here for almost four years and it still amazes me how miraculous this place is. You will understand soon, I am sure."

She opens the door to her office. No key is needed. She always leaves it unlocked just in case one of her students might need the space when she is not around to let them in. A chair is pulled out in front of her desk for Lachesis should she choose to sit and Deirdre lights a fire to boil water for tea with a wave of her hand.

"This is a Fódlan blend," she explains as she begins setting up tea for two. "The Hresvelg Blend. It is quite popular among my students and it does remind me of something similar I have had back home in the capital even if it is not quite identical. I think you will like it. It reminds me of the sort of teas you used to drink, too."

She is still not quite sure what to make of this reunion but she supposes it is going better than it could have. She is nervous but she continues to smile. No matter what happens, this chance to see Lachesis and know she is alive and well will be cherished.

"Are you teaching here, too?"

He Teaches Symbology at Harvard!