mymelodylvr

[mymelodylvr]

another eddie thought.

eddie munson who had to have his head shaved bc his curls were matted so bad when he was younger. as soon as he got taken in to wayne’s care, after spending nearly a year with his dad, his hair was beyond gone. barely brushed, just neglected.

wayne, bless his heart, tried to detangle it. he knew how eddie liked his long hair, he didn’t want to shave it. he even took him to the beauty salon, the beauty school up the road, tried to get them to detangle it. two deep conditions and an hour later, the instructor told him the best they could do was shave it, send him with some product on how to care for it in the future.

eddie was devastated, wayne was guilt ridden, and eddie’s locks were now shaven off right before he had to start at the middle school.

from that point on, eddie was nearly neurotic about brushing his hair every night. getting every single tangle out. ripping through the curls until it’s smooth. frizzy and slightly damaged from the tension, sure, but smooth.

at first, it’s something you try to talk him out of. “you’re ripping your hair out.”

“it’s fine.” eddie grunts, paddle brush tearing through the base of his neck, the most matted and tough curls. “rather lose a little than have to shave it all off again.”

he tells you the story, once, after that. one that leaves your heart aching, despite how he tries to shrug it off. insist it’s not a big deal, that it didn’t bother him- how his father’s neglect hurt him yet again, even after he was taken in with wayne. you know better.

you don’t try to fight him on it anymore. instead, every night, it becomes a ritual that you brush his hair for him. a far gentler touch, more patience to work out each curl and tangled strand. grasping at the base of his head to keep it from tugging and hurting so much.

it’s soft and intimate. leaves eddie’s chest with a warm, gooey thick feeling, and his eyelids fluttering with sleep. trying to keep his head up while you brush his hair, scratching at the scalp, always pressing a kiss to his part when you’re finished.

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haven’t been able to stop thinking abt rafe comforting you the same way his mother comforted him :( the second he sees you tearing up he’s pulling you into his lap, rubbing slow circles on your back the same way she used to do for him. his voice drops, taking on the tone she’d use on him whenever his emotions overwhelmed him — gentle, careful; laced with a kind of love he’s never learned how to truly put into words. he never rushes you, never asks you to stop crying or forces you to tell him what’s wrong. sometimes he hums, scratchy and awkward, trying to emulate the lullabies from his childhood.

rafe doesn’t know any other way to comfort, it’s not like ward taught him anything of use. moments like this, when you’re sniffling softly into his chest, desperately clutching onto his shirt, he’s reminded of what he’s lost. what he’ll never be able to experience again. her face sharpens in his mind when he’s like this, her sweet smile and soft eyes vivid despite the smoky haze of time. (rafe wishes he could see her like this more often, not the misshapen blur usually present in his memories.)

occasionally, when you’ve fallen asleep in his arms, heart slow and steady, rafe stares at the ceiling and wonders if he’s doing it right — if she’d be proud of the man he’d become. he can’t help the promises, the desperate admissions that slip out of his mouth, words he’s too proud to voice otherwise. “‘m trying, mom,” rafe breaths, chest tight and voice shaky. “dunno if ‘m doin’ it right, but ‘m tryin’. i swear.”

[mymelodylvr]

Queer (2024) Luca Guadagnino

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[mymelodylvr]

[mymelodylvr]

hi!!! this was the first tumblr blog i created so it's shown as my main one, but my most active account rn isn't this one! this account is just for outerbanks stuff, and i probably wont post much anymore <3

[mymelodylvr]

YUUUUUHHHHHHHH OMFG

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oh my god why was i born a woman im chopping off my uterus

i fucking hate my period holy shit why

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i fucking hate my period holy shit why

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𝓼𝓶𝓪𝓵𝓵 𝓽𝓱𝓸𝓾𝓰𝓱𝓽𝓼 02

rafe’s thumb brushed over your lip, slow and deliberate, his eyes dark as he leaned in. “you know what you do to me, don’t you?” his voice was a low rasp, barely controlled. “this mouth… fuck, i can’t stop thinking about it.”

you opened your mouth to respond, but he didn’t give you the chance. his lips crashed against yours, rough and insistent, his hand gripping the back of your neck to keep you exactly where he wanted. when he pulled back, just enough to breathe, his eyes locked onto yours, still fixated on your swollen lips.

“i should be doing something else right now, anything else,” he muttered, more to himself than you, but his thumb traced the outline of your mouth again, and he smirked. “but here i am, needing to feel you. taste you.”

he pressed another kiss to your lips, softer this time but just as consuming, his tongue teasing the seam until you let him in. when he pulled back again, his fingers curled under your chin, tilting your face up.

“you have no idea how fucking beautiful this is,” he murmured, brushing his thumb across the wetness of your lips. “every time i look at you, all i wanna do is this.”

taglist: @namelesslosers @maybanksangel @averyoceanblvd @iknowdatsrightbih @rafesheaven @anamiad00msday @ivysprophecy @wearemadeofstardust0 @rafesangelita @sstargirln @rafedaddy01 @soldesole @bakugouswaif @skywalker0809 @vanessa-rafesgirl @evermorx89 @outerhills @ditzyzombiesblog @slavicangelmuah @alivinggirl

[mymelodylvr]

i watched brokeback mountain today and i cant stop thinking about it

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its the 12th and i still have my resolutions intact huzzah

[mymelodylvr]

just watched queer (i cried)

[mymelodylvr]

tn i hate you i hate you

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[mymelodylvr]

my roman empire is this scene where rafe tries ward’s jacket on after he “dies,” except the jacket doesn’t fit. it never has, and it’s never going to, no matter how big rafe gets. he looks childlike almost, like a little boy slipping into his father’s work shoes despite the size gap. the jacket doesn’t fit no matter how much rafe wants it to, no matter how perfect he is, he will never amount to what ward wanted him to be and in this essay i will

[mymelodylvr]

im so pissed off i slept through it

LOVER (LIVE FROM PARIS) HEART SHAPED VINYL (x)

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[mymelodylvr]

which of the boys do u think has the biggest ego. or what do u think they have the biggest egos abt and how does it manifest

you would think its rafe its not rafe he has too much self loathing its jj thats why is mottos “stupid things have great outcomes all the time” because he literally acts like nothing could ever happen to him it manifests in everything that doesnt have to do with his dad