mymauvemaude - Tumblr blog

mymauvemaude · 1 day ago

Text

Writing Notes: Hate

TRIANGULAR THEORY OF HATE

Typically hate is thought of as a single emotion.

But there is reason to believe that hate has multiple components that can manifest themselves in different ways on different occasions.

According to a triangular component of the duplex theory of hate, hate potentially comprises 3 components.

As with love, hate can be captured by both feelings triangles and action triangles.

Feelings may or may not translate themselves into actions, and actions may or may not represent genuine feelings.

People may interpret actions as meaning different things, depending on their mappings of feelings into actions and vice versa.

There are 3 components of hate: negation of intimacy, passion, and commitment.

Negation of intimacy - involves the pursuit of distance, often because the hated individual arouses repulsion and disgust.

Passion - expresses itself as intense anger or fear in response to a threat.

Commitment - is characterized by cognitions of devaluation and diminution through contempt for the targeted group.

The 3 components give rise to 7 different types of hate (plus non-hate), based on the particular combination of aspects involved:

Non-hate: No feelings of hate (none of negation of intimacy, passion, or commitment)

Cool hate: Disgust (disgust of negation of intimacy alone)

Hot hate: Anger/Fear (anger/fear of passion alone)

Cold hate: Devaluation/Diminution (devaluation/diminution of decision/commitment alone)

Boiling hate: Revulsion (disgust of negation of intimacy + anger/fear of passion)

Simmering hate: Loathing (disgust of negation of intimacy + devaluation/diminution of decision/commitment)

Seething hate: Revilement (anger/fear of passion + devaluation/diminution of decision/commitment)

Burning hate: Need for annihilation (disgust of negation of intimacy + anger/fear of passion + devaluation/diminution of decision/commitment)

THEORY OF HATE AS A STORY

The theory of hate as a story proposes that hate emerges from different kinds of stories. Some of the most common stories, deriving from the work of Sam Keene, Anthony Rhodes, Robert Zajonc, and others, are:

Stranger (vs. in-group) - Negation of Intimacy + Commitment

Impure-other (vs. pure in-group) - N

Controller (vs. controlled) - C

Faceless foe (vs. individuated in-group) - C

Enemy of God (vs. servant of God) - Passion + C

Morally bankrupt (vs. morally sound) - N + C

Death (vs. life) - N + C

Barbarian (vs. civilized in-group) - N + P + C

Greedy enemy (vs. financially responsible in-group) - N + C

Criminal (vs. innocent party) - C

Torturer (vs. victim) - N + P + C

Murderer (vs. victim) - N + P + C

Seducer/rapist (vs. victim) - N + P + C

Animal-pest (vs. human) - N + P

Power-crazed (vs. mentally balanced) - C

Subtle-infiltrator (vs. infiltrated) - C

Comic-character (vs. sensible in-group) - C

Thwarter/destroyer of destiny (vs. seeker of destiny) - C

Instigation of hate covers roughly 5 steps. Not all steps need to occur in order for hate to come into being. Indeed, even one step may start the process. The steps are:

The target is revealed to be anathema.

The target plans actions contrary to the interests of the in-group.

The target makes its presence felt.

The target translates plans into action.

The target is achieving some success in its goals.

Finally, perception becomes reality.

There may be elements of truth in some stories.

Example: A particular opponent may be loathsome in any number of ways.

But the power of stories is that their perception becomes, for the individual experiencing the stories, reality.

The individual typically does not question whether a given story is true. For him or her, it simply is true.

Sources: 1 2

Writing Notes: Love Click "Keep reading" for more examples. Warning: Very long text.

taxonomy of types of hate

The three components of hate generate, in various combinations, seven different types of hate. They are probably not exhaustive, and, because they represent limiting cases, are not mutually exclusive. Particular instances may straddle categories.

Non-Hate. Strangers on the street are likely to fall into this category, as may members of one’s family or one’s friends. But family members may arouse mixed emotions, so there is the possibility that some degree of hate exists toward family members, even coactively with feelings of love. In a healthy society (and a healthy person), most feelings one has toward other people are non-hate.

Cool Hate: Disgust. Cool hate is characterized by feelings of disgust toward the targeted group. The hater wishes to have nothing to do with the targeted group. Members of the targeted group may be viewed as subhuman, perhaps as vermin of some kind or as garbage. Visceral prejudice may be expressed as cool hate. The Sidney Poitier movie Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner depicted the visceral reaction of disgust of parents of a White woman who brought a Black man (her new beau) home to have dinner with her parents. Because the main feeling is a “cool” one, the reaction may be one of aversion rather than confrontation.

Hot Hate: Anger/Fear. Hot hate is characterized by extreme feelings of anger and/or fear toward a threat, and the reaction may be to run away or to attack (flight or fight). Sudden flare-ups of hate, such as road rage, are examples of hot hate. Gang members may kill others if they feel disrespected by the comments or even gestures of others. Riots often are accompanied by hot hate. People who feel only cool hate most of the time may be provoked and stirred up by the passion of the moment and find their hate converting into hot hate. The conversion may be short-lived. After the mutual egging on of the riot is over, those involved in it may revert to feelings of cool hate.

Cold Hate: Devaluation/Diminution. Cold hate is characterized by thoughts of unworthiness directed toward the target group. There is something wrong with the members of this group. Indoctrination often portrays the group as evil, as in Ronald Reagan’s conjuring up of the “Evil Empire” in referring to the former Soviet Union. This kind of use of metaphor invokes a number of free associations, all of which are stereotypically negative. The indoctrination may be against any group – Communists or capitalists in the Cold War (which was “cold” in more ways than one). Cold hate can be instilled even among those who have never encountered members of the target group. For example, it is not uncommon to find anti-Semitism or anti-Islamic cognitions among people who have never actually met a Jew or a Muslim. People are often unaware of their own cold hate. It is simply too much a part of who they are and how they were brought up. The cold hate may lie dormant unless the people are forced or inadvertently come into contact with members of a hated group.

Boiling Hate: Revulsion. Boiling hate is characterized by feelings of revulsion toward the targeted group. The group may be viewed as subhuman or inhuman and as a threat, and something must be done to reduce or eliminate the threat. The targeted group may change from time to time. In the earlier stages of the Third Reich, the Soviet Union was perceived as bad and revolting. Then, when Hitler made a pact with Stalin, the Soviet Union was perceived as good. Then, later, it was perceived as bad again. There was no sense of permanent commitment to any belief about the Soviet Union and Soviets. Negative intimacy and passion were instilled with a distinct absence of commitment. The change was later captured in George Orwell’s novel, 1984, where the identity of the enemy changed from one day or even one moment to another, and people were expected to adapt their hatreds to those chosen for them at any given moment by the government.

Simmering Hate: Loathing. Simmering hate is characterized by feelings of loathing toward the hated target. The targeted individual/s may be viewed as disgusting and as likely always to remain this way. There is no particular passion, just a simmering of hate. Ruthless, calculated assassinations often take this form. There is nothing sudden about such assassinations, which may be planned over periods of time, as Lee Harvey Oswald’s assassination of President Kennedy apparently was. Alfred Hitchcock’s movie Strangers on a Train depicts an individual who has felt simmering hate over a long period of time, and has devised a plan to have a murder committed without his actually having directly to take part in it.

Seething Hate: Revilement. Seething hate is characterized by feelings of revilement toward the targeted individual/s. Such individuals are a threat and always have been. Planned mob violence, often preceded by fiery oratory, sometimes takes on the characteristics of seething hate. The goal is to arouse the mob to violence, as in the Krystallnacht, where mobs were sent to destroy shops of Jewish shopkeepers who were portrayed as seeking to destroy the economy of Germany. In these cases, the targeted group may be portrayed not as subhuman but as more than human, for example, as being engaged in a worldwide plot of domination or conquest. Fears among U.S. militia groups of black helicopters sent by the forces of world government show this kind of hate. The enemy is not subhuman, but superhuman in its massive organization and conspiracy to take over the world. The Left Behind series of novels, portraying a world very loosely based on the biblical book of Revelations, describes the efforts of the Anti-Christ and his allies to take over the world and the people in it.

Burning Hate: Need for annihilation. Burning hate is characterized by all three components of hate. The haters may feel a need to annihilate their enemy, as postulated by Kernberg (1993) for extreme forms of hate. Some years back, Eli´an Gonzalez, a Cuban boy who was found clinging to a boat off the shores of Florida, was seized from his Miami relatives by the U.S. government. There were massive demonstrations in Miami, Florida, and Union City, New Jersey, as well as elsewhere, against Fidel Castro and the U.S. government, which was seen as in league with Castro. The outpouring of hate was powerful. The targeted group may be viewed as diabolical destroyers, and indeed, a poster shown on CNN depicted then Attorney-General Janet Reno with the horns of the Devil.

relations of the components of hate to terrorism, massacres, and genocides

The triangular theory of the structure of hate speculatively holds that hate is related to terrorism, massacres, and genocides through the number of components of hate experienced.

Danger Level 0: No Hate-Based Danger, results when none of the components of hate is present.

Danger Level 1: Mild Hate-Based Danger, results when one of the components of hate is present.

Danger Level 2: Moderate Hate-Based Danger, results when two of the components of hate are present.

Danger Level 3: Severe Hate-Based Danger, results when three of the components of hate are present.

Massacres and genocides are much more likely to result, arguably, when all three components are present. They are also a product of stories.

stories underlying the development of hate

The Stranger Story. The hated enemy is a stranger. Propaganda typically shows the object of hate as very strange looking. One Nazi propaganda poster shows a Jew with a Star of David tattooed on his forehead, with evil-looking squinting eyes, with a grossly asymmetrical face, with a twisted lip and a double chin, and with large ears notably sticking out from his head. No one can look at this poster and identify with the individual depicted: He is a stranger. We usually think of strangers as people we do not know and never have known. But they need not be. Often the stranger is someone who is familiar to us, and whom we thought we knew, but who, on reexamination, now appears to be someone else – someone strange and perhaps incomprehensible. The stranger story can apply to interpersonal relationships. We may be in a relationship with a partner whom we think we know quite well. Then we discover, to our astonishment, that the partner is having an affair, or has a sizable private bank account that he or she has hidden for many years. The person whom we thought we knew well may now come to seem like an utter stranger, and we may find ourselves wondering what other things about the partner that may be detrimental to our well-being he or she has not revealed.

The Impure Other Story. The hated enemy is impure or contaminated. Typically, the enemy is trying to spread this contamination. The enemy must be stopped before the contamination gets out of control (or to stop contamination that already is out of control). The euphemism “ethnic cleansing” may call to mind images of an enemy that needs to be eliminated from a society that otherwise would be pure in much the same way dirt needs to be eliminated from holy relics. In a close relationship, hate may be generated by the discovery that the partner has been contaminated, as by an extramarital affair or a disfiguring disease. In some societies, it is sufficient for a woman to be raped for her elimination to seem necessary to certain men with this story. The woman now is no longer viewed as pure and therefore may be seen as having ceased to serve her purpose. Curiously, and with unabashed sexism, the impurity applies only to the wronged female, not the male who wronged her.

The Controller Story. The hated enemy is trying to control you and perhaps the world. One German propaganda poster shows a Jew riding on top of the shoulders of Roosevelt, Churchill, and Stalin, who is knee-deep in water. The only happy face in the poster is that of the Jew on top. Stories, such as the controller story, may have elements of truth. For example, the Sunnis in Iraq, although a minority, controlled the country for a long time. Some of them built up a system of oppression and repression that was, although brutal toward all Iraqis, especially arbitrary and invidious toward Shiites (Ghosh, 2007). But the stories may also be completely false, as when a group is targeted as controlling a society when in fact they are powerless and persecuted.

The Faceless Foe Story. The hated enemy has no face and indeed has few distinguishing human characteristics. For example, one political cartoon shows a dozen Soviet leaders who all look exactly the same, and have few, if any, distinguishing human characteristics. They are faceless and indistinguishable from each other. In a close relationship, one may reconceptualize one’s partner as faceless – as ordinary – and feel one’s love dissipate and even turn into hate if one feels tricked into having (previously) believed that the partner was special. Sometimes, perpetrators seek to be faceless. Torturers may hide their identities so that their victims cannot later identify them. Other times, victims are made to be faceless. Bombardiers may find it easier to destroy a whole town from an aircraft because, to them, the enemy is faceless.

The Enemy of God Story. The hated enemy is not only your enemy, but also, an enemy of God. The stories, as tends to be the case historically, are created by cynical and destructive individuals who seek to use others as their tools for wreaking havoc and destruction. This story can apply to individuals in intimate relationships in which one or both are religious. If one of the partners comes to be perceived by the other as having committed a mortal sin, then a loving relationship can turn to hate as the couple struggles with the (perceived) sin of the blamed partner. In a religion story of love, a reconceptualization of the partner as of the Devil rather than of God can suddenly turn love into hate.

The Moral Bankruptcy Story. The hated enemy is immoral or must be eliminated on moral grounds (as proposed by Zajonc, 2000). The enemy is doing immoral things, such as praying to the wrong god or gods, or to no god at all. Or the enemy is defiling holy sites or simply insulting the morality of God or humans by its very existence. During the Salem witch craze, one excuse for the elimination of alleged witches was their immoral pact with Satan. In close relationships, a spouse who comes to be viewed as immoral may be hated on account of the alleged immorality.

The Death Story. The hated enemy represents death. One Italian propaganda photo shows the Statue of Liberty carrying its torch and igniting a city. At the same time, it is taking off its mask to reveal a skull underneath. Enemies often do represent death. For example, the Janjaweed militias in contemporary Sudan come as close to representing death as any destroyers can. But these militias, following historical patterns, portray themselves as protecting the lives that are “worth” protecting, and the civilization that they claim to represent.

The Barbarian Story. The hated enemy represents a barbarian. Rome was eventually overthrown by enemies that the Romans viewed as barbarians. Today, the world faces attacks on many fronts from enemies viewed as barbarians. The barbarians, in turn, are likely to view those they attack as morally decadent and themselves as saviors coming to sweep away the decadence they believe they see among those they attack.

The Greedy Enemy Story. The hated enemy is exceptionally greedy. When gasoline prices reached high levels in the United States, one oil company produced a greater profit than any U.S. company in the history of the country. A CEO had just retired from this company with an exceptionally generous retirement package. The problem is that sometimes hated objects act in ways that promote rather than destroy the story that they would wish to have dissociated from them.

The Criminal Story. The hated enemy is a criminal, and needs to be dealt with as such. The hated person or group may have stolen something away from one, such as a loved one or some object of value. Propaganda photos frequently are made to look like wanted posters. One such poster from World War II, produced in the United States, shows Hideki Tojo, Prime Minister of Japan during World War II, in such a wanted poster. In a close relationship, discovering criminal behavior on the part of one’s partner may turn love into hate, especially if the criminal behavior is directed toward oneself. The behavior need not be legally criminal. If one perceives it as morally criminal, that may be enough to generate this story.

The Torturer Story. The hated enemy is a torturer. Some propaganda posters show actual portraits of individuals who have been tortured by enemies. In a close relationship, one may come to conceive of one’s partner as a torturer, and come to feel hate rather than love toward the partner. The torturer story is one of the most powerful stories of hate. In modern day Argentina, Chile, South Africa, and other countries, victims and their family are still trying to come to grips with a long history of government perpetrated torture. And attempts are still being made to identify the people responsible for the torture – both the torturers themselves and those who commissioned them to execute the torture.

The Murderer Story. The hated enemy is a murderer. Sometimes actual photographs are used, such as a widely distributed photo of right-wing students hanging and simultaneously hitting a left-wing student over the head with a chair. The right-wing students are smiling and cheering as the act progresses. In a close relationship, sometimes individuals feel that their lives are threatened, literally or symbolically, by their partners, and may come to feel hate rather than love toward their partners.

The Seducer/Rapist Story. The hated enemy is a seducer or a rapist. One German propaganda poster shows an older, ugly Jew seducing a beautiful woman. An American poster shows unclothed women in cages being inspected by Nazi soldiers. In close relationships, an individual (usually a woman) may come to feel that sex is no longer consensual but forced, and may come to experience hate rather than love for the partner. Unfortunately, many hated targets are rapists. Soldiers in war frequently use rape to satisfy their own lust, and to demoralize and humiliate the enemy. Rapes may occur in intimate relationships as well as in any others. They may also occur in families (incest).

The Animal Pest Story. The hated enemy is an animal pest, such as a germ, an insect such as a cockroach, a reptile, or some kind of a beast. One World War II German propaganda poster shows the Jew as a rat, with the heading “Rotten.” A World War II Italian propaganda poster shows the American G.I. as an ape. In a close relationship, one may come to view one’s partner as animal-like – a pig or a rat – and may come to feel hate rather than love for the partner. These stories become more powerful as those who perceive themselves as victims feel that the violations occur on a repeated basis.

The Power Monger Story. The hated enemy is crazed with the lust for power. A World War II German propaganda poster shows Roosevelt embracing the globe, his face crazed with the lust for power. In a close relationship, one may come to view one’s partner as totally absorbed by power aspects of the relationship, and as seeking total domination. One may feel one’s love convert into hate. The leaders of some countries come to be seen as power mongers. Unfortunately, they may act in ways that promote the stereotype. Whatever their intentions, their efforts to combat hate may then be belied by their own actions.

The Subtle Infiltrator Story. The hated enemy is a subtle infiltrator. One British poster shows a group of Army officers talking while a beautiful woman is sitting amongst them, pretending to be “dumb” but listening carefully to all that is said. Stalin used the subtle infiltrator story to induce hate of certain groups. Beginning in 1927, he staged a series of show trials designed to show that various groups were actually subtle infiltrators in league with the enemies of society. For example, managers, engineers, academics of various kinds, people associated with religious movements – all were portrayed as in league with and in the pay of world capitalists to destroy Soviet society (Mace, 1997). Similar stories are still used today to target individuals and groups.

The Comic Character Story. The hated enemy is a comic character. During World War II, American comic books often portrayed comical Nazi soldiers as being demolished by American super-heroes. A Walt Disney cartoon showed Donald Duck throwing a tomato at the face of a comical Adolph Hitler. Charlie Chaplin played a comic Hitler as well. Nazi propaganda portrayed Jewish women as fat, ugly, and stupid. In a close relationship, one may come to view one’s partner as a comic figure – as a buffoon or a fool – and feel one’s love turn into hate. This story may be less effective in inducing hate than some of the other stories, because it is likely to instill neither anger nor fear. Indeed, it may lead people to view a threat as less serious than it is, and, because of its comical portrayal, to dismiss any danger the threat poses.

The Thwarter/Destroyer-of-Destiny Story. The enemy is hated because of its role in thwarting or destroying a certain destiny. For example, the murderer of a loved one may be hated because the murderer has destroyed what should have been the destiny both of the loved one and of the one who has offered the love.

structure of the stories of hate

Because the stories of hate tend to be simple, some people might prefer to view them simply as negative stereotypes, or as negative images of the enemy.

Why use the story concept at all? Because, arguably, each is associated with an anticipated set of events.

The key point is that the threat represents a dynamic story, not just a static image or stereotype.

Whereas stereotypes tend to be somewhat one-dimensional, immobile, and static over time, stories are multidimensional, fluid, and changeable over time.

1. The Target Is Revealed to be Anathema At some point, often long in the past (and probably more often than not, in the imagined past), the target reveals itself to be worthy of hatred. Perhaps members of the group killed God, or slaughtered members of what is now the in-group, or plotted the destruction of the in-group, or revealed themselves to be dirty or greedy or whatever. Although the events giving rise to the groups’ being labeled as anathema may have occurred long ago, they can remain in a metaphorical sort of Jungian “collective unconscious.” In some cases, the events may never have occurred at all. They may merely be imagined to have occurred, such as when they are part of an oral history of dubitable validity.

2. The Target Plans Actions Contrary to the Interests of the In-Group One may not become aware of this problem right away. But at some point, one becomes aware that for some time, often a long time, the target has been planning actions contrary to the best (and often, any good) interests of the in-group. Whatever the problem is, it is no longer historical in nature; it is current. Because members of the in-group often do not realize they have been “plotted against” until what they perceive to be rather late in the plotting process, they may feel a sense of desperation and urgency. Of course, in many instances, the planned actions are imaginary, which does not make them any less “real” psychologically to those who are being manipulated into hating the members of the target group.

3. The Target Makes Its Presence Felt The story often first becomes perceptible when the target appears significantly on the scene. The target may come from outside, either legally (through legal immigration) or illegally (through illegal immigration, invasion, or imposition by outside powers). But the target also may come from inside. Perhaps it has been there a long time. Indeed, people often feel that they were blinded, and that only now are they realizing the threat that has been there for some time. Now the target is becoming powerful, and hence is becoming a force to be reckoned with, before it is too late. Stalin was notorious for devising elaborate plots that were alleged to have been hatched against the government, which had no more reality than the proverbial will o’ the wisp.

4. The Target Translates Plans into Action Members of the in-group believe they are becoming aware that the period of plotting is over for the target. The target is actively translating thought into action, and thus has become a true threat, not just a hypothetical one. Sometimes the action is now perceived to be already quite far along before individuals realize what is going on; other times the action is perceived to be just starting up. The exact type of action depends on the content of the story. In many instances, the only action is that of the perpetrators against the targets, who were never planning any action in any event. Enemies of God actively work against God. Beasts cause wanton destruction. Rapists, of course, rape men, women, and children. Subtle infiltrators covertly try to take things over. Thwarters of destiny try to make sure that the in-group cannot achieve the goals it deserves to achieve. In each case, the target group works against the in-group. What differs is how they achieve their goals. Often, they may achieve their goals in multiple ways through multiple stories.

5. The Target Is Achieving Some Success in Its Goals Unsuccessful targets may be viewed as pathetic, such as members of very small groups that have dreams of taking over the world. But once the target is not only acting, but achieving some success in its actions, feelings of hatred and perhaps the desire to act upon these feelings become a force to be reckoned with. In sum, the images, in themselves, are the contents that fill in the story schema. In a sense, the precise story is less important than how many of the above steps the target group has (in the minds of the in-group) managed to enact. The more steps the target group enacts, the more of a threat they become, and the “hotter” the hate is likely to be (i.e., the more the number of components that are likely to be operative).

mapping to the triangle of hate

Different stories are likely to induce different components of hate, but which are induced probably depends in part upon the person.

Consider a few examples:

Stories of individuals or groups as vermin or as impure are likely to induce negation of intimacy.

Stories of individuals or groups as murderers or rapists are “hot” and thus are likely to induce passion.

Stories of individuals or groups as greedy or as dominators are “cooler” and thus are more likely to induce commitment.

the relation of hate to love

Often, love is viewed incorrectly as the opposite of hate.

They are thought to constitute just one single dimension on which a person can move from love to hate, from hate to love, and so forth.

Hate is neither the opposite nor the absence of love. Rather, the relationship between love and hate is multifaceted.

Therefore, love and hate can exist at the same time in the same person with regard to the same object.

The opposite of love is rather indifference.

Hate and love have a lot in common. Both involve very intense emotions and attraction of a certain kind.

Love and hate both have three components, which are interrelated.

In one case, the components are inverses of each other. In the other two cases, they are actually the same, but are experienced differently.

Different people have different combinations of these components so, structurally, may experience hate (or love) differently.

The stories of love are also susceptible to turning. Consider some of the stories of love, and how they can contain within them the seeds of destruction:

1. Addiction. An addiction story involves one partner’s feeling addicted to the other, or less frequently, both partners feeling addicted to each other. Addictions are usually, in themselves, love–hate relationships. One feels bound to something or someone, but feels also one’s freedom to escape is restricted. Feelings of love especially can turn to hate if one feels that one’s addiction is self-destructive, as when one feels an addiction toward someone who is abusive toward oneself or others.

2. Business. In a business story, two people essentially view each other as investments, much like they might invest in people in any other business. The difference is that this is a particularly important investment. A business story succeeds by virtue of both partners feeling that the business is equitable and works to their mutual advantage. But if the business goes bad – one partner makes poor decisions that lead to financial or other forms of distress, or if one partner proves to be untrustworthy, the relationship can go bad rather quickly, and turn love to hate.

3. Fantasy. In a fantasy story, the partners view each other much the way characters would in a fairy tale. The success of a fantasy story in love typically depends upon the partners respectively occupying the roles of prince and princess, king and queen, or similar roles. But just as frogs can change to princes, so can princes change to frogs. And just as kings or queens can be perceived as beneficent, so can they be perceived as malevolent or as imperious. The success of the fantasy story thus depends on the partners maintaining positive images in the roles they occupy. Should the images become negative, hate can replace love.

4. Horror. Horror stories are stories based on one partner’s terrorizing the other. Relationships based on horror stories are almost always love–hate relationships to begin with. One is attracted by, and simultaneously repelled by, the abuse that characterizes such relationships. In some cases, the individual who is the object of the terror in such a relationship may come to hate the perpetrator, much as the victim comes to hate the perpetrator in a massacre. There is also a psychological phenomenon called “Stockholm Syndrome,” in which the victim of a hostage-taking develops positive emotions toward the hostage-takers.

5. Mystery. In a mystery story, one partner seems mysterious, and the other acts as a detective trying to solve the mystery. A mystery story gains its interest by virtue of the fascination of one partner with the mystery represented by the other. The individual peels away one layer of mystery after another. But one may find that, at bottom, the story is not a pleasant one. For example, the mystery may be that the partner is exploiting one, or is involved with other people as well. Love can then turn to hate.

6. Travel. In a travel story, two partners travel through life together, trying to the extent possible to stay on the same or at least proximal paths. A travel story can go bad if a partner feels that the other partner has departed from the path they set out together, or has started to regress on the path. If the paths diverge too much, and one partner does not like the path the other is taking, that dislike or even hate may transfer to the partner. This can happen, too, when one of the partners goes through a physical, psychological, or social transformation that changes him or her. When he or she makes new friends his/her partner dislikes or gets on a career trajectory that makes him or her much more successful than the partner and leaves that partner jealous, hate can develop as well.

7. War. In a war story, two partners enjoy fighting with each other. They seem constantly to be at war with each other. Love may turn to hate if the war becomes a serious one, and the partners find that the fights lose whatever good nature they originally may have had. The war story perhaps provides the best transition from a consideration of love to a consideration of hate.

Sources: 1 2

Writing Notes: Love

332 notes · View notes

mymauvemaude · 1 month ago

Text

Friendly Competition.

Spencer gets a little too cocky and thinks he can please you better than a toy, so you take it upon yourself to crush his ego.

Warnings: Sub Spencer, Dom Reader, Mommy kink, vaginal sex, degradation, begging, fake disinterest, self-doubt, crying, creampie, mating press, sex toy, all consensual.

WC: 1.4K

“You know I can do so much better than this Mommy, please..”

Spencer pleaded, nimble fingers trembling as the vibrating bullet in his hand was practically driving him crazy. You were sitting in front of him as he knelt before you, and he was just barely holding it against your dripping folds at this point, desperate to prove to you that you surely didn’t need this stupid toy to please you.

“Because I don’t need you right now, Spencer. You’re lucky I’m even letting you do this for me.”

Truth be told, you knew he could do a better job than the toy shakily pressing against your clit, but shattering his ego and rendering him useless was always worth it anyways.

The man let out a pitiful whine, jutting out his bottom lip in a defeated pout as he continued to circle the toy against the taunting bundle of nerves he so desperately wanted to taste for himself.

He felt his chest growing heavier and his mouth practically watering at the sight of the slickened silicone that pushed the wet folds of your cunt around in his face. It was almost torture at this point.

And not even a minute had passed before he was whimpering out again and begging you to just give him a chance.

“M-Mommy please.. Let me do it..”

Clicking your teeth and sighing deeply, you roll your eyes and give into the need that was pumping through the veins of his cock and brain alike. There wasn’t a hint of amusement or content in your voice at all, but it was more than a relief to hear the word, “Fine”, slip out of your mouth.

Within seconds, Spencer had discarded the vibrator and was leaning over you on shaking elbows, mouth agape as he let out hot puffs of air between the two of you. One hand was holding up his entire body while the other was shakily grabbing himself at the base of his throbbing cock, messily running it up and down your pussy.

The entire time he was psyching himself up, you had a look of disinterest plastered all over your face. Eyebrow cocked, lips downturned, it looked almost as if you had better things to do than be filled to the brim by the quivering man above you.

Sure, you were far more aroused with just his tip rubbing up against you as compared to the harsh vibrations of the toy, but you weren’t about to give him the satisfaction of knowing that. It’d inflate his ego and get to his head, and no one likes a cocky boy.

The brunet was almost in shambles by the time he finally mustered up the courage to sink into you, and it felt almost heaven sent, the way you sucked him in and molded around his shape. There was a crude squelching sound when he bottomed out, both of you being far too wet, and he almost choked on the lump in his throat at the sound alone.

“F-Fuck.. Mm–”

He whimpered softly, his thighs were shaking and his balls felt so full it almost hurt. It took almost everything in him to not finish right there, if he did he’d feel foolish for wasting such an opportunity.

Lifting his head to look at you, his heart dropped and his eyes widened in surprise when he found you didn’t look like you were enjoying this nearly enough as he was, if at all. You had an expression plastered on your face that just screamed, ‘Are you done yet?’, and it made his confidence crumble in his chest.

Maybe he wasn’t doing good enough? Not going as fast or hard as you needed, maybe that’s all it was. He didn’t want to even think about the possibility of not pleasing you like you deserved, especially when you were reacting so much more to that stupid toy he hated using so much.

His hips began to thrust faster than before, slipping in and out of you with ease that made his head spin. And he could feel himself reaching the spot inside of you that you usually love, but right now it seemed like you weren’t even paying attention to him.

Now he was going harder, if faster wasn’t working, surely this would. His thin hips crashed into the insides of your thighs, balls slapping crudely against the plush fat of your ass, it was too much for him but seemingly nothing for you.

He’d had cum by now if not for the shame that was building up inside of him, he was far too distracted by the way you just weren’t responding to his rough thrusts to let himself finish.

His cheeks burned with embarrassment and his lips quivered as his words were dying in his throat. Swallowing and looking at you with teary eyes, his voice is no louder than a shrill whisper as he pathetically begs you to, “P-Please do something”, and you just laugh in his poor little dejected face.

“You said you could do better, I’m waiting, Spence.. If you’re done, I’d like to use the toy again.”

And he just about cried in that moment, never had he felt so degraded in his life by you, and desire the feeling of his ego and confidence being crumbled before him, it only made him want to do better for you. He absolutely needed to prove to you that he’s better than any toy you could ever buy.

Abruptly grabbing your ankles, he hiked them up to rest on his bony shoulders and practically folded you in half. Leaning over your body and pushing his cock deeper inside of your warm walls, he pressed your knees against your chest and huffed against your neck.

“Please, Mommy.. Just wanna do good for you..”

He whispers huskily against the sweaty skin of your throat, wet tongue poking out of pink tinted lips and licking up the side of your neck to the curve of your jaw. His hips pistoned his dick impossibly faster into you, jackhammering his length as deep as your cervix would allow him to.

You bit your lip in an attempt to stop yourself from letting it slip just how close you were, because despite the fact you were in charge and always were, he was positively ruining you right now. The leaking tip of his cock was stamping brutally against your sweet spot, and it no longer became possible to hide the tremble in your thighs that gave away the way you were about to burst.

Smiling evilly against your jaw, sharp canines bare and sink into your flesh, making you break your composure and moan out involuntarily. Spencer’s body goes into overdrive at the sound, and he snags the skin of your ear, only to desperately whimper into it.

“Tell me how good I’m doing Mommy, pl–oh fuck–please..”

His hand reaches down to rub against your sensitive clit and you almost lose it, throwing your head back and sighing loudly. Your thighs close instinctively, but with how fast his hips were bucking up against you, they were spread wide open in an instant.

“F-Fuck.. My god–You’re doing so good, baby..”

You groan out and squeeze your eyes shut as you can feel your orgasm not so subtly creeping up on you. Spencer whines out when he feels your cunt clench around him even tighter, feeling as though he was being forced out of your walls with how fixed around him you were.

“Look at me, Mommy.. Please look at me..”

He begs you desperately, not being able to bring himself to finish inside of you before you gush around him like he needed you to. And as soon as your blissed out eyes met his that were dripping with tears, your jaw dropped open in a choked out cry as you came around his cock.

Sticky fluids of your release leaked from around his length and left a creamy ring around the base that almost had him fainting. His thrusts turned frantic and sloppy, and wanton sobs forced themselves out of his throat as he pushed himself as deep as possible and flooded your cunt with ribbons of thick, warm cum.

Your eyes crossed and rolled into the back of your head at the feeling of him spilling his cum and fucking it into you. He did his best to gracefully collapse against your sweat slicked body. The both of you panted in unison as you laid in silence for several minutes, which were absolutely necessary after absolutely defiling each other.

Spencer raised his head from your chest, and with brown curls sticking adorably to his forehead, he almost too bashfully asks you, “D-Did I do good?”.

Scoffing in amusement and rolling your eyes, you pull his head back down against you, running your fingers through his sweaty hair and sarcastically muttering, “I think I’ll keep you around.”

2K notes · View notes