mylittleinnermonologue

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“My mother told me when I was young that there are two types of girls that will love me: 1. The girl who makes me happy but makes me feel unloved. 2. The girl who makes me sad but makes me feel loved. She told me that on rare occasions I’d find both qualities in one girl. But not every boy is lucky to find both qualities in one girl. So if I ever have to choose between the two, she told me, to always choose the girl who makes me happy because that’s what she always wanted for me. Yet I don’t want a girl who makes me happy. I want a girl who makes me feel loved. So if I ever have to choose between the two, I will always choose the girl who makes me sad.”

— juansen dizon, Confessions of a Wallflower page 113

[mylittleinnermonologue]

I knew

I deserve

someone else,

but please

remember that

there were

moments in my life

when all I wanted

to have

was you.

Not anyone else

but you.

Lost Chance//ma.c.a

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“I see you with her, and it crushes me inside. Guess I should stop thinking about you all the time.”

Tori Kelly “All in My Head”

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“You went back though didn’t you? Even after you promised your best friends that you wouldn’t You went back just to remind yourself why you left in the first place Just to feel it all one more time You went back because you thought it would be different this time didn’t you? Even after your mother told you boys like him will never realise what they’ve done Tell me did he make your heart beat butterflies this time? Or was it the same old fire in the bottom of your stomach? The feeling you swore you could never handle a second time round Tell me where did running back to him get you? Was the breakdown in the school bathroom all worth it for one more day of feeling him? Was the second heartbreak anything like the first? Did it teach you anything about running back? Please tell me you’ve finally learnt that boys like him will always feed you poison And girls like you will always swallow it whole”

— On running back to the boy that made me loose everything, in more ways that one

[mylittleinnermonologue]

It’s time to walk away

[mylittleinnermonologue]

injustice;

"You can't be in love with someone you never dated."

Is your way of saying you don't believe in unrequited love. To you, love won't exist until someone tells you those three little letters.

But, darling, that's where you are wrong.

Love doesn't have to be requited in order to be present.

It is not something that can be defined by a singular word.

And the truth is, you have already felt it.

You feel it every time they are around,

And even when they aren't.

Love doesn't follow rules,

It breaks them.

So stop running scared babe,

and face what you already know.

You are in love,

and it's unrequited.

But you cannot pretend that it isn't love.

[mylittleinnermonologue]

“The impulsive, self-destructive, toxic side of me wants to run back to him because that’s the kind of behavior I’m so used to. I’m used to understanding, defending, giving too many chances. But I know I can’t act like that anymore. I know I have to let him go, for myself because I deserve to be treated better and I know there’s no hope of recovering the trust he threw away.”

— Growing Pains - Jess Amelia 

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Every part of me hates you, when I see you my heart drops straight into my gut, when I think of you my thoughts create a mess of negativity. After all this hate, I still care for what you think of me. I’ve tried to avoid you at all costs, but I still can see you and seeing you makes me fall in love with you all over again.

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““I think I wait for people to hurt me,” she said quietly, “and when they do I feel a certain smugness at being right. And, after that, I just feel pain.”

— Sue Zhao

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Truth be told, I've been scared to write about you for the last few months. In my head, you see, it's always been easy to take your actions and romanticise them into something they are not. With the touch of a pen, I can make you utter words you and I both know you'd never dream of saying aloud. But the difference between fiction and reality, is you don't love me. And not even I can pretend that isn't true anymore.

He never loved me

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"You can write about something you haven't experienced, I write about love all the time"

— Cynthia Chapman

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“Maybe you weren’t the one for me, but deep down I wanted you to be.”

— Khalid; Coaster

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You were the only one I never stopped loving.

Poetry At Most

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“what a tragedy it is to be afraid of the same darkness you’re so helplessly attracted to”

— (- via solana r. )

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“When you became absent was when I realized you were never there”

— Cynthia Chapman