mylifeofmum-blog

[mylifeofmum-blog]

Weaning confusions!

We took the decision to start weaning at 5 months, we felt our boy was ready. We started very slowly, just a few homemade purees here and there. Not every day, just tastes to get him used to it and it went very well. He took to it easily and enjoyed what he was given. We also decided that as soon as we felt he was ready, we would do a mix of puree and baby led weaning as we wanted to get him used to both. To our joy, he's taken to it all swimmingly and at 10 months old, he pretty much eats exactly what we do. Of course I take a few precautions with what he can and cannot have at this stage but I love being able to give him 'proper food'. My only issue with all of this is what foods are available in shops for babies. We of course want to give him a good mix of foods, nutritionally he needs a good balance and although we want him to have as healthy a diet as possible, we of course add some fats and dairy in there, but in a healthy quantity. If i know I'm going to be out for lunch time or we're off out on a play date, i will prepare a lunch (as much as i possibly can!), to take with us. But when we get caught short and need to buy out, I find options are limited. Maybe I'm just being picky, overthinking it or just not looking in the right places but all there seems to be for babies is puree pouches or jars, and snack items like crisps, biscuits and rice cakes. I don't mind the latter as you can get vegetable crisps and organic healthy sweet treats to have and use as and when but with the fact we decided early on that shop bought purees were a no go, we can't just load him up on snacks. I have no issue with puree pouches and jars, they are of course very handy. We just decided it wasn't for us. Especially when we bought 1 as we really felt like there was no other option at the time, and it gave him a bad tummy. I feel like, at the moment, all we can really get is a cheese sandwich and a pot of fruit. I have ventured into trying tuna and mayo sandwiches after finding out those things were ok for his age but it's hard to know what he can have. All we're told is that before the age of 1, strictly no honey or salt allowed. We stay clear of honey altogether, salt is harder. I know it's not that they can't have any, just that they can't have much at all and of course no extra salt added to food. But those aside, as a new parent, i find that you're still caught thinking well can they have this? Can they have that? I don't feel like we are told enough information of what they can and cannot have. Especially when baby led weaning. I feel that you're steered more towards puréed foods, moving on to lumpier etc etc, but not enough info on the baby led weaning side of things and I certainly feel that there really isn't enough quick food in the shops for babies under 1 who are baby led weaning. Everything seems fried, seasoned with high salt content and things like carrot sticks that are too hard for children with very little teeth (mine only has 2 so far!). It just leaves me scratching my head every time we are out searching for food. Looking at kids snacks, all i seem to see is those baby snacks and sugary yoghurts and drinks, cheesestrings, lunchables etc. Am i just not looking hard enough? Or is the food industry really making it hard for parents to give their children healthy foods? My food journey continues!

[mylifeofmum-blog]

Terror will NEVER win.

In light of lasts nights events, I decided to write a quick blog post.

A mixture of feelings are running through me today. Heartache for these poor victims and their loved ones, sadness for the fact my own son is to grow up in this cruel world but also joy that he is totally unaware of what’s happened. But I don’t feel anger. You should never feel anger is these situations, as that means they have won. They don’t get to win. They shouldn’t even get a second of our thoughts. Our thoughts should always be with the ones who have lost their lives and their loved ones who grieve them. I don’t care what the motives were, nothing excuses this.

I sometimes think, should I really have bought a child into this world? A world full of hate? Was I cruel to do so? But then I stop myself and think hell no! If we ever thought those things then, again, they’ve won. We have a right to live our lives and make our own decisions, not decisions based on the hate. We can’t live our lives worrying about what’s to come. All we have to do is hold our loved ones close, and teach our little ones how to love and not hate. Teach them about all the good people in the world and how to be one.

Most of all I always feel immensely proud in these situations. Proud of our nation standing together. They will never win.

We win.

[mylifeofmum-blog]

Dear teething, I hate you.

Well I thought it was too good to be true when we had a very short bout of teething a couple of months ago with little man happy as larry then screaming in pain in a split second. It happened two nights in a row then nothing. He’s recently had his 2 bottom teeth cut through with minimal fuss and just a bit of ear grabbing (apparently the two are connected)…. But now….. Jeez.

He’s definitely teething pretty badly. Maximum drool, nose streaming, crying in his sleep (luckily we’ve had only 1 broken night of sleep with that) and moaning like a trooper.

The worst thing is obviously seeing him in pain and only being able to shove some calpol, bonjela, cool chews and what ever you can in his mouth to help him. But the most annoying part, (aside from the irritability), is he’s gotten massively fussy with food. This boy can EAT and he will eat what ever you put in front of him. Not now. Breakfast, fine. Lunch, ok, dinner…. Give me strength. He either won't eat it and out right refuse, or he'll take forever to get going and eat it so slowly you think that by the time he's finished he'll be a teenager. Fruit however, he will eat till his heart's content of course, as it's lovely and sweet. Then his last bottle of the day before bed is left with the majority of the milk still in it. I'm really hoping this is just a phase. I know this can happen when teething so I really hope it is just that and he'll be back to normal eating asap especially as I'd like to start giving him some proper dinners and not just purée. I've tried that in this teething period and he doesn't want it, really annoying when you've prepared it and he won't have it. Some mums are lucky with their babies sailing through teething like little troopers, I wish this was the case with us! So dear teething, you're a bitch. I hate you. My baby hates you and I think you should do one pretty soon. (Not that there's much I can do about it). Yours, a stressed mum and baby.

[mylifeofmum-blog]

'Mummy Friends'

In my opinion.... You need them! Friends without babies are of course just as great, especially if they understand that you may not be as available as you once were and need good notice of any events. Mummy friends however, particularly ones who are pretty new to this crazy world of parenting, are so valuable. They are going through the exact things you are. The highs, the lows, the poo, the sleep deprivation. So when you've had a bad day or night, they are there to help you feel sane again, ready with their own stories of woe. So please, surround yourself with these glorious beings. If you are going to antenatal classes, keep in touch. I really recommend it. You're all in the same boat, going through everything at the same time and being able to message each other, especially when you want advice is really helpful. If you don't meet any antenatal friends, and you don't already have mummy friends, get yourself out to baby groups. These of course are fantastic for babies, helping them learn and interact with other children, but it's great for meeting other mums. There are also mummy meets. Now all of this may sound scary for some of you, as it was for me. I was lucky enough to meet some amazing friends at our antenatal classes who have been on this journey with us from the very beginning. We meet when we can, but we are always there for each other on our whats app group chat. We genuinely keep each other sane. We message any hour of the day and ask every question because with us, no question is silly. We're all giving help, tips and advice when each other needs to. It's also so amazing to watch each of our children grow and hit their milestones. It's like having an extended family. As i said, it was scary for me and sometimes still is. Anyone who truly knows me, knows that I hate meeting new people. Not because I'm some moody bitch, but genuinely through sheer lack of confidence. So going out on my own to meet a group of brand new people who i have never met in my life, was out of the question, especially going to meet them with a view of actually interacting with them. Ask me back then to do that and I'd probably tell you to sod off. Since having a baby though, I've come to realise how valuable mummy friends are. It's incredibly important to get yourself to any baby group you can. Some are super cheap, others you have to pay for a course, but you can get free classes too. Every library does free groups and some do a variety of groups and for different ages. They are so important for babies and children, helping them grow and learn new things. It's also really good for mums too. As soon as I could, I forced myself out into this scary new world and realised that it's actually pretty great. However, I read something the other day, a story from another mum who tried to get herself out there and meet new people with a negative outcome. She found some mums really weren't interested and barely managed to crack a smile when she offered one to them. Never asked how she is, if she's been before or asked about her baby. This really made me feel sad. Sad that there are people out there who would act in such a way. You don't have to make permanent friends at these groups, even just to say hi and start a simple conversation is enough. Cause at the end of the day, you don't know who you're saying hi to. That mum you're saying hi to may have had the worst nights sleep, may have had the morning from hell and you saying 'hi' and just giving her a knowing 'I'm there with ya!' Smile, could really make her day. Let her know she's not alone. In my experience I've had mostly positive experiences and met some lovely people. I have had a couple of times when you just know that certain people just aren't interested and that's ok, I just shrug it off and think, their loss! So if you are due to have a baby, find yourself a 'mummy friend'. Get yourself out there and meet some new people or reach out to people you may know who have recently had a baby because I guarantee you, it's the best thing ever. Mummy friends don't care that you need to ask them a million questions, cause they probably have a million more. They don't care that you haven't brushed your hair today and probably have some sort of suspect stain on your top because they are going through the same wonderful, knackering, exciting, crappy times you are and they need you too!

[mylifeofmum-blog]

Back to work! Sat here feeling really sad today, as after spending every day for just over 6 months with my little man, I'm back to work tomorrow. .... Just had to stop for a moment then as I actually just started crying! I've obviously known that my return was imminent, but writing this, it has just completely sunk in. I'm very lucky in the fact that I am only returning part time, 3 days a week isn't bad and those 3 days will be spent with his nana and dad so I know he's in good hands but it doesn't make it any easier! But alas! I haven't won the lottery, therefore we need money. Money which will ultimately be for us and our little boy, so that's what i have to think of. I'll be missing him more than he misses me I'm sure!

[mylifeofmum-blog]

Sleep routines - SEND HELP!!

Sleep routines are a struggle but worth it in the end. That’s what I have to keep telling myself anyway.

As I’ve mentioned numerous times, our boy set himself his own routine which we followed and it worked well. I thought he was a pretty good sleeper till I ask my sister in law (who is now qualified baby sleep expert) for some tips on how to get him to sleep through the night. She gave me a whole routine to try and it worked pretty much straight away. We had one or two hiccups but 99% of the time, he will sleep through. What a revelation! Trouble was, he started to lose his momentum with napping in the day time. He’d go so long without one that he’d get over tired and it would be a huge struggle to get him to sleep, then when he eventually did, it would only last 30mins max. He wasn’t the happy boy he usually was and in turn we weren’t happy either, I admit I cried in frustration a few times!

So I turned to my wonderful sister in law who gave me this whole daytime routine. It was a massive change to what we are used to and is pretty strict. It also includes tips such as having a mini routine before every nap, no bum patting, no nose rubbing, no dummy, just a shh and a night night and put him to sleep awake. I knew it wouldn’t be easy as it’s a big change but I thought, he goes down awake without a dummy when it’s bedtime, so surely he would get used to it quickly. HA! how naïve I am.

This routine also includes the 'Cry it out’ method. I’m pretty strong when it comes to that, I don’t run to him as soon as he makes a sound, but even this was hard for me. I had to leave him 10 mins each time, go in say ‘shh, night night’, turn him back onto his tum and leave him again. It didn’t work for us as he got so worked up he was screaming like a banshee. So we compromised and did the method of leaving him 2min, then 4min, then 8min and then if he still didn’t settle after the 8min, we’d give him the dummy SUCCESS! It worked a treat and although I was annoyed at myself for letting us give him the dummy, I thought well, It’s working and maybe taking baby steps will be the answer.

I’ve documented my daily journey through this new routine in my facebook page ‘my life of mum’. It's had it’s ups and downs but he figured out quickly that ok, when she says night night, she mean night night! Slowly he’s gone down much quicker and now doesn’t have the dummy at all. To be fair, he’s never really liked his dummy, it’s been mostly for our benefit! I’ve also left him longer to cry it out as I’m getting stronger at doing it and realizing, he’s ok! Babies cry, he’s not in distress, just moaning.

I’ve been keeping my sister in law in the loop about how it’s all going and she continues to give me tips and support. She told me however that they do tend to go into a regression around day 5. Great. Thanks. Day 5 came however and feeling rather smug, he was absolutely fine, still doing well. Day 6, well. He was harder to get to sleep again but continued to sleep for 1 ½ - 2 hours per nap when he eventually fell into a slumber. So I thought, oh ok, bit of regression but not bad. Day 7 (today)….. Christ. Feels like we’re back to square one! He woke up early, took me 45mins to try and get him back to sleep. Nope, wasn’t having any of it and worked himself into such a state, I’ve never heard him scream like it! The first nap took a while to get him to sleep again and he only slept for 45mins and again refused going back to sleep by screaming as loud and as hard as he could. Nap 2 - cried his eyes out but decided to leave him and 10 mins later he’s gone, so far as I’m typing this it’s been 40mins and I’m hoping he will be down for another hour at least. One can only hope!

I know that this is just a blip, I have to keep telling myself that. I was meant to go and get him weighed this morning and was so frustrated and annoyed this morning that I couldn’t be arsed. I did go in the end and I’m glad. I told the HV all about it and she said 'You’re doing great, just keep at it, consistency is the key’. That cheered me up and made me remember that I just gotta stick with it and all will be well again.

My advise for sleep routines would be: If you have any issues with sleep at all, small or big. If you think it’s great but could improve. Do it, try a routine. Not all routines will work for you and your baby as they are all different. Baby steps is the key. You will find what works for you and trust me, it will be so worth it in the end. I’m getting some time to myself again to crack on with housework, or just chill for a bit and being able to sleep through the night is wonderful. It will work.

[mylifeofmum-blog]

Tips for going abroad with baby!

It's a daunting prospect for some new parents but it's totally worth it so you just gotta go for it! We took our boy away for his first holiday (outside my tummy!) when he was nearly 3 months old. Its was wonderful to share our time away with him, whether he cared or not! From that 1 experience though, I have a few tips! 1. Plan plan plan. I'm a total list maker and in this situation you need to be. There's not just your suitcase to plan, there's baby's who needs a whole lot more. 2. Plan how many outfits you may need and how many spares. If you are going self catering and will have a washing machine, then great! Means less clothing to take as you can just wash as you need to. 3. How many suitcases? The less the better! If you can sacrifice your needs, taking one suitcase for baby and squeezing your stuff in theirs or share a case with your other half, then great. You have so much you need to take now so the less luggage you take, it will make it a whole lot easier for you. 4. Hand luggage. Keep it small or wearable. You will have so much to carry now, pram, car seat, baby's essentials and of course baby, that it can get a little much tying to juggle it all. So keep it to essentials if possible. 5. Do you need the pram? If like me you're on a snowy holiday, don't bother! Car seat and sling are enough and again less hassle. 6. Steriliser. You need it. They are so bulky though and I would worry about breaking this essential item so something I was made aware of was steriliser bags! They are fantastic, you chuck the clean bottles in with a bit of water and put them in the microwave. Most bags you get you can use up to 20 times too! Just make sure where you are going has of course got a microwave! We didn't. Oops. 7. If you're breastfeeding, then you have instant milk on the go. Bottle feeding, you will need to plan how much milk to take! The best thing we had was aptamil ready milk bottles to take for the journey there and back and we used the powder while we were there. So handy. 8. Toys. You don't need them all! Choose a few, takes less room! 9. Ask for help! We were lucky in the fact that we were offered it most of the time, if you're not, ask. 10. Speedy boarding. Having kids means you get to go to the front of the queue with the speedy boarders (most of the time). We did and to be honest, I wish i'd waited till last. Getting priority to get on the plane means you're some of the first people on, but doesn't mean people will give you enough time to get in your seat with your child! We got on, had all out bags to put away, a baby to get out of the car seat he was in and a queue of people behind us. It's the same getting off the plane, wait! Stay until everyone has gotten off, trust me, it's less stressful! 11. Ear popping! It's bad enough for us, but for little ears, it can be a stressful. The best tip I was given was giving baby a dummy or his bottle (or breast) on take off and landing, as the sucking helps with the ears! Worked a treat! 12. Extra seat or not? Well. It's a tricky one as you don't want to pay for an extra seat for baby unless you have to. Some flights will let you have baby on your lap for free, or they charge a percentage of your ticket. They sit on your lap with an extra belt that attached to yours. Great for short haul flights but for me, if it's a longer flight. I would seriously recommend considering getting them their own seat as it's a long time to have baby on your lap and would be much easier to get them to sleep on their own and be comfier! They sit in their car seat which is good for naps. I have seen these child suitcases you can get though that they can use up to age 7. It doubles as bed that can be used in the plane seat, it's amazing. It means baby can lay flat to sleep and be comfy! So worth a look! I'm sure that I could probably think of more tips so will post more when I think of them but my main tip as I said is to PLAN and go for it! You won't regret it!

[mylifeofmum-blog]

Poor me, poor baby!

When illness hits, you just have to get on with it…. Well. As much as you can anyway.

In the 6 months my baby has been on this earth, I’ve had about 4 or 5 colds (I’m loosing count!). Each time, our baby inevitably gets it as being at home with him everyday and the husband being at work, you can’t avoid the germs being passed on!

My last cold was the worst yet. It seemed a lot of people got it, one of those nasty lingering ones too and as much as i laugh and moan at my husband when he gets ill and tell him to man up, I’ve realised that in fact I get ‘man flu’ just as much as him! Oh how i feel like I’m dying every time, I can’t cope!

But when you have a baby, you just have to get on with it, push through what ever you’re feeling and look after them as they most certainly can’t look after you! Especially as he was poorly too, I felt guilty complaining about myself when he couldn’t do anything to help himself or have anyone to moan to as such, he just got on with it, no complaints at all! Smiling through as best he could, just with a bit of a poorly stare and a cough. Mind you, when I was at my worst, we did stay in our pjs for nearly 2 days and curled up under a duvet in the fort i built us (yes that’s right, a fort!).

Pooey nappy changes are worse when you’re feeling sick too! So I took full advantage of getting my husband to do them when he was about. He was thankfully about for a couple days mid cold and it was the best, I could just let him take over!

Of course there’s worse things out there you could be suffering from and be looking after a child. The worst I had was mastitis, that wasn’t just mentally challenging (as it feels like you have the flu when you get it) but physically too as I was in so much pain it hurt to hold him, let alone having him against my chest, that was a no no!

So what you quickly realise when you’re a parent and get poorly, you gotta just man up! Of course if you have someone who can help then great but if not, buckle up and ride it out!

[mylifeofmum-blog]

Naptime nightmares!

Oh my oh my oh my!

Our boy has been a great sleeper. Not perfect, but pretty damn good. As a small baby he slept a lot. Apart from night time feeds of course, he was asleep a lot of the day. Getting older his night time sleep was better and he was awake a lot more throughout the day.

We’ve never really had a routine as such as we let him lead the way because he was pretty routined in himself. He’d have a feed every 3 hours, we’d let him play till he was tired after every feed and when he got tired we’d get him down for a nap which would last at least an hour, but sometimes 2 hours. He’d always wake just as it was feeding time or just before. Sometimes we’d even have to wake him. It was pretty much clock work. Night times all we’d do is whether he was asleep or awake, we’d make sure we fed him at 9pm and put him straight to bed. This worked well for a while, until he got to his fidget stage which i once spoke about in a past blog but then got back to being pretty good. Again, it wasn’t perfect. The majority of the time he’d wake only twice maybe 3 times but still we’d get the odd night of waking 6 times which isn’t fun. On nights like that though I’d be obviously pretty miffed and frustrated but the next day I’d remind myself that actually, from what I’ve read online, he’s better than a lot of babies out there and I’d feel ok again!

It wasn’t until I spoke to my sister in law, completely forgetting she’s training to be a baby sleep expert (how could i forget that?!), that she helped me set an actual night time routine and my god. I wasn’t sure it would work at first but it did pretty much straight away. We may have the odd night where he’ll need to be settled but 9/10 he’ll sleep the whole night through. Fantastic.

Now. Trouble is a couple of weeks into this new routine and his daytime naps have gone completely topsy turvy. He’ll nap for 30mins the majority of the time and fight so hard not to go back to sleep, i mean, literally throwing himself about the cot. Especially now he’s rolling everywhere. Then of course by the time his feed comes around he’s been moaning for the past half hour up to it and I’m constantly battling to keep him occupied or shoving healthy snacks in his hands. We’ve tried making the room darker, putting him down awake, having him sleep on us first, trying to stop him rolling over, feeding him a little earlier, pitting him down earlier, later, everything. I’ve been in tears, close to tears, tearing my hair out as it’s frustrating that he was so good, now all of a sudden it’s a battle. I don’t want to change his feeds if i can help it as it will mess the night time routine up.

Thankfully my sister in law is setting out a daytime routine for me, to help. Fingers crossed it works! Watch this space!

[mylifeofmum-blog]

Keep rolling rolling rolling rolling huh!

(To the limp bizkit fans out there, you’re welcome, that’s now stuck in your head right?)

It’s been a LONG time since I posted a blog update. It’s been crazy busy for me and a lot has happened since my last post. But I’m gunna jump straight in with a new(ish) development…. Rolling!

Now my son, it seems, is a bit of a tease! When he was around 2 months old he rolled quite a few times on his mat, front to back, mainly because he hated tummy time so it was pretty much out of pure frustration that he’d throw himself over. Since then, nada. Nowt. Zilch. It was like he couldn’t be bothered, ‘urgh too much effort mum’. He did however start rolling front to back in his cot, but only there. He’d lift his bum up so high and throw himself over, put him on the floor. Nope. 'I don’t know how to do it mum honest!’ Little pickle.

We tried everything to help him along. More and more tummy time, which he eventually grew to like. Put his toys to the side of him, roll him over to 'show’ him how it’s done, put him on the play mat, floor, sofa, any ruddy surface. No no no. He just wasn’t interested. Until one day, bang! Look at me rolling!! He started rolling back to front out of nowhere. I screamed in excitement and clapped his achievement, to which he laughed and kept on doing it. Finally!

Now front to back. Still only doing it in his cot, we’d put him on the floor and encourage him but he’d flail his arms out and start doing some sort of breaststroke. Then yesterday, hurrah! He flung himself over with such ease like he thought I can’t go on pretending that I can’t do this! Again i squealed with glee!

It’s truly wonderful, every little milestone. It seems like a massive step. It’s amazing. The trouble we have now is…. He won’t stop doing it! Which of course is fine and lovely when he’s up and playing, but trying to get him down for a nap, is even more tricky now he wants to continue showing me his new skill. He only sleeps on his front, he won’t sleep on his back. So when i put him down for a nap on his front, he flips over like 'excuse me! Napping’s for fools! Let me show you how i can roll over some more!’.

Give me strength. Or a bottle of gin.

[mylifeofmum-blog]

Prime example of my latest blog post 'oh the drool!'. Tried to take a nice photo.....

[mylifeofmum-blog]

Oh the drool!

We’ve been knee deep in drool for quite a while now. It first started with what I like to call the ‘The pussycat phase’ where no matter what goes near his mouth, his tongue pops out for a taste and starts lapping at it like a cat drinking it’s milk. It’s pretty cute, until he starts doing it to your hand as you’re trying to burp him!

The licks turned into the full on 'Grab and shove what ever I can into my mouth’, all the while the drool is getting worse and worse. I mean sometimes it’s a little drip, other times you’ll be bobbing him up and down on your knee and a waterfall would suddenly come from know where and drench your leg. It’s especially tricky when you’re on the floor holding him over your head, making him giggle, you really in this moment have to dodge the drool before it falls onto your face.

You have to make sure you wipe their faces a lot in this time as they end up with dribble rash (yes that’s a thing!), so a muslin must always be at hand! I keep saying that we should make him wear a dribble bib 24/7 but I can never remember and then wonder why he always ends up with a constant wet patch on his clothes. The worst is when you go to kiss them on the cheek without realising he just wiped some fresh dribble over it!

All this aside, as far as dribblers go, babies are cute so they get away with it! The best thing is to watch them start to explore everything, a little odd that they do it with their mouths mind you, but watching them desperately trying to grab something to shove it in their gobs and not realising that they didn’t quite get a good grip and in fact have their fist in their mouth is heartbreakingly hilarious. We have this thing where we let him think he’s about to shove our fingers in his mouth, but pull them back at the last second so he has his own instead, I’m sure he’s gunna cotton on soon!

Like with poo gate, you need to embrace the drool. Because I’m afraid, there is no way of getting away from it! Just enjoy the stage that comes with it, them munching anything in sight! It’s cute. Very cute.

[mylifeofmum-blog]

Poo!

Oh poo. Being a parent means that poo is a daily topic. ‘He hasn’t done one today!’ 'OMG you should have seen the mess!’. You can’t get away from it. They are little stinky poopy machines!

You’ve just had baby. Exhausted but happy you may be excited to do the first change as this is when your parenting kicks in! …. It’s black. Greenish-black. What is wrong with my baby?!?! Nothing! It’s tarry and a lot like motor oil but it’s meconium poo, made up of amniotic fluid and all other things ingested in the womb (urgh).

Soon, if you’re breastfeeding, baby’s poo will turn to a yellow, maybe even slightly green. Looking like a rather unsavoury mustard. It’s grim and starting to stink.

If you’re formula feeding, the poo is much like that of a breastfed baby. Slightly paler and starting to resemble crunchy peanut butter, and the stench is most definitely worse.

Now my baby hasn’t started solids yet so I can’t tell you about the solid food poos, but trust me, I’ve seen pictures and heard stories. They stink. BAD. They also look horrific. (Oh my, can’t wait!)

All babies are different. Some go a couple of times a day, some go once a day everyday and some may go every other day. But they can also be very unpredictable. Even if they are regular and go at the same times or days, it can change all of a sudden. You could be waiting for days maybe even a week with a no show, and my word you’ve never hoped for a poo more in your life. Then when it comes you have never been happier to see it! Praising baby 'Well done you!’. Like he’s just done something amazing. Can you imagine if we praise an adult for pooing? Stand outside the bathroom door while your husbands on the bog shouting 'Well done you! I’m so proud!’. Then you could have a baby with a bit of a gippy tummy and just wished so bad that they would just stop!

My word what a mess it can make too. Sometimes it’s not just contained in their nappy, oh no. It likes to seep out the edges and be smeared up their legs and back. Soiling their clothes and making it more of a clean up job than you’d hoped for. THEN you have to try and hold their legs so they don’t make even more of a mess as they kick about, all the while trying to put that dirty nappy into the nappy bag one handed. You more often than not end up with it all over one or both of your hands. It’s gross.

I’ve had times when I’ve had him pooing on my lap while chatting to someone (how rude). Secret poops where you don’t hear it coming until the smell creeps up on you. Ones where you think it’s a little, stand up to change him and it’s somehow seeped through the clothes and made it’s way onto mine. Once I had to change him on the backseat of our hire car on holiday, it was an explosion. Cleaned him up and as I went to tie the nappy bag, realised it had gotten all over the handles, therefore all over my hands, so started wiping my hands down before (rooky mistake) putting a new nappy on, and he peed all over the seats in the car, lovely.

You will talk about it to your mummy friends, you’ll talk about it with your non mummy friends, you’ll definitely talk about it to your health visitor, your lucky family and you’ll even talk about it with your husband whilst out having a romantic dinner for date night. You can’t get away from it, so get used to it. If you’re squeamish, get over it. Buy a nose peg if you have to. Because as long as that baby needs his nappy changing by you and can’t go poopy on the potty, you’re stuck with it. Embrace the poop!

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Guide for New Parents to be - What to buy!

So you're going to be a mummy or daddy! It's exciting and you've probably already bought a few cute outfits in preparation because let's face it, they are so hard to resist! But don't buy too many! I was extremely lucky and although I bought 2 vests (foo fighters and nirvana - obviously!), every single piece of clothing my boy had to start with was either a hand me down from my cousins boy, or bought for me from friends and family, and I had a lot! Also, as I've mentioned before, I'm tight and some what cheeky as I wanted to see what I was bought first before running to the shops as it's inevitable that you will get gifts. Also babies really do grow very quickly so you don't want to go over board and end up with clothes that were never worn, it's a waste of money. So I have here a list of things that are essential for babies arrival and a list of things to possibly wait for!

Essential Items:

- Bodysuits. They are a must as they will be worn under every outfit day and night to keep baby warm. They should be in one extra layer to us. So you will need quite a few, maybe aim for a weeks worth at 2 a day, and get someone to wash them for you, just to begin with. I'd also suggest getting a mix of long sleeve and short sleeve and don't buy all newborn size as baby may be bigger than you were hoping (sorry!) and some newborn clothes are pretty small so get 0-3 months too. Even if the 0-3 are a little big, that's better than being too small! You can buy these in packs of 3 or 5 in most places and it doesn't matter too much if they have a 'design' to them, just get them plain as you won't see them anyway, they'd be hidden under clothes. Plus plain in cheaper!

- All in one sleep suits. Again buy the same size wise as the bodysuits and you could buy a few less as obviously they will only be in them for bed, but make sure you have a few extra for any 'accidents'. I'd get mostly thinner ones as you can always add a layer or an extra blanket if you feel it's too cold one night.

- All in ones for daytime. These are usually thicker and great to start with as opposed to outfits as you will want to put them in something easy and more accessible to begin with while you get used to being a new parent. Also if you get ones with feet, you don't have to battle with socks! Again, get a mix of newborn and 0-3months just incase.

- Socks. They are essential if baby has bare feet, to keep them warm. I would actually just stick to newborn size for this one as even if baby is a little bigger than a newborn, the socks will usually still fit. My baby is 4 months now and still wears newborn socks from time to time. Also get well elasticated ones as they tend to fall off much less! You can buy these in packs at pretty reasonable prices so go mad.

- Mitts. Actual mitts are terrible so I would stay clear! You can never get them to stay on. Instead, buy all in ones that have fold over cuffs that act as mitts, these are amazing and can obviously never fall off! If you find baby in a body suit without cuffs one day. you can always stick socks on their hands.

- Hats. Just 2 will do to begin with (I would say 1 but they tend to get dirty after putting one on a newborn straight away with goo still in his hair!). They wear them pretty much straight away to get warm and obviously you will need one when you leave the hospital.

- Coat. Just get one to begin with.

- Nappies. Obviously nappies are a must. I had some great advise from my cousin. I was freaking out wondering what size to buy and how many. She told me, buy 2 or 3 packs of each size 1's, 2's and 3's to begin with as when baby is here, if he gets too big for the 1's pretty quickly, you will have the 2's at the ready. Also there is always someone you can call on to grab you another pack if needs be. You won't run out this way, I promise. Also I would say with nappies, don't automatically think that the big brands are best. Everyone has different experiences with different brands of nappies. I'd heard great things about own brands such as asda and aldi so I bought a few different brands just incase and I tell you what, the aldi ones have been amazing for me and I didn't get along with pampers. So don't dismiss cheaper brands straight away, give them a go and see.

- Nappy sacks. you'll go through these quickly too so don't get an expensive brand. You can get a box of 200 scented ones in the pound shop.

- Wipes. Again, something you will be using a lot. It's up to you whether you go for scented or unscented and what brand you choose. I went for the cheap unscented brands as I have pretty sensitive skin myself so thought baby is going to be that twice over and I went for Tesco's own brand as that's what I use for myself and never had an issue. plus they usually have a great offer on for multibuys. I did buy a few others again just incase but found the cheaper ones the best as some of the bigger brands can be quite foamy. Shop around for deals here, there are usually loads and stock up, I had about 20 odd packs and am still going through them.

- Cotton pads. These are only essential if like me you are going to start off with cool boiled water to clean baby's bits. We did this for the first month. Obviously not as handy as a wipe but you get used to it. There are loads of cheap ones too. Lidl and Aldi have great ones as they have an edge to them which means they don't fall apart and leave a trail of cotton down there!

- Bibs. I would get enough for 1 a day for a week, just incase baby tends to be a sicky one and spits up all over them.

- Muslins. Get them. Get loads. They not only help wipe baby's mouth after food, but they are so handy for anything and everything else. Trust me. You need them. Get a few multipacks!

- Cot and Crib. Get both straight away. I can't advise which ones to buy as every baby is different so do a little research to find the right one for you. The co-sleepers are great and moses baskets aren't the best but as I said, every baby is different.

- Pram. Much needed of course. Again I won't advise on a particular one, that's up to you. But I would recommend one that has a car seat attached. Less hassle getting baby in and out of the pram to the car seat and vise versa, especially when they are sleeping. Always, ALWAYS check though before you buy that the pram will fit in your boot! They are bigger than they look and some boots are smaller than they seem. Most places will let you check so please do!

- Car seat. If you aren't getting a pram and car seat combined.

- Sterilizer. Absolutely essential. The best thing we bought was a sterilizing kit. It was a sterilizer with all the newborn bottles we needed, hand breast pump, bottle brush and a dummy. Saves you buying extra bottles. It's good to make a start with. Also, I would suggest you get a sterilizer that plugs into the wall. You can get one that you microwave but if you do, don't do what we did and buy it without checking it fits in your microwave. When it says fits most standard size microwaves. That isn't true! Luckily we found this out in time before baby arrived and swapped it for a plug in one.

- Baby bottles. If you're not breastfeeding and your sterilizer didn't come with any. Buy around 6 newborn bottles.

- Blankets. A nice thick fleece or wooly one is great for outdoors or the daytime when it's extra cold. But for the evening I would suggest getting a couple of cellular blankets as these are safer for baby incase the blanket goes over their face, it is less likely to cause any harm as they are full of breathable holes. 

- Breast pads. Whether you are breast feeding or not. You will need these. When that milk comes in you will tend to leak. Especially when you get out of a hot shower or bath (it's like a waterfall at times!). Just get a box to start with.

- Maternity pads. Yep. Sorry! They are massive and for some they are uncomfortable but they are essential. You will be bleeding a lot I'm afraid and only these will do. Get 2 packs.

- Nursing bra. Only if you're breastfeeding. You can also get just a non underwired sports bra. Not only great for breastfeeding but so comfy when your boobs are already in pain. Also an underwired bra has been known to restrict milk flow.

- Fitted bed sheets. Just get a couple to start with. I also went for a waterproof mattress protector for any accidents. Babys don't use duvets or pillows until they are 1 so stay clear of these.

- Baby towels and flannels. Again just a couple to start with as a newborn doesn't need a daily bath. You can just use a small bath towel, but I've found the baby towels are softer.

- A changing bag. This will be your baby. It will have everything you need in it when you are out and about so get a good sized one, but nothing too big that you are constantly fumbling around trying to find those wipes!

- Nail clippers. Babys nails grow very fast and when they are moving their arms and legs around like they have absolutely no control over them, they will tend to scratch themselves.

- Formula. If you aren't breastfeeding then get a tub ready. 'First milk' is the one to look for. You can take it to the hospital but most hospitals have formulas on hand just incase anyway. Also if you are breastfeeding, I would recommend buying one just incase things don't go to plan. If you don't end up needing it then great, I'm sure you'd be able to sell it on to someone who does need it. But it's there if you do end up needing it.

-. Thermometer. They don't have to be a 'baby' one. Just a general one will do. Great for checking baby's temp and also the bath temp. 

- Non bio washing powder. Better for baby's skin.

- Changing mat. We have one thick comfy one for home and a travel one that lives in the changing bag for outings.

- Hand gel. Some may think this isn't essential. But you have to be careful with germs around a baby so hand gel is great to have handy.

- Ready meals. They don't have to be unhealthy ones. You can cook a big batch of a couple of your favourite meals and freeze them. Trust me. You don't want to be cooking for the first few week at least.

- Nipple cream. Handy if you're breastfeeding, also great for baby's dry lips.

 Non-Essential items

- Baby bath. They can be handy for some, but they take up a lot of space. You can just hold baby in the bath or a sink or bathe with them. I found our baby grew out of the bath very quickly. You can get bath seats but I found baby would float off and you'd end up holding him anyway.

- Nappy bins. Just use a normal bin and make sure you empty it regularly. Easy and a hell of a lot cheaper.

- Play mat. Great for a little later on when baby is more aware of what's around him and can see further. But don't rush out and buy it for his arrival.

- Baby swings. Great to pop baby in when you need to go to the loo or put some food on, But again, it can wait a week or so. You will no doubt be putting him in his crib more when he's a newborn.

- Outfits. By all means get them if you'd like. But perhaps get 1 or 2 sizes up as you probably won't use them straight away and you can get them after baby's arrival.

- Breast pump. Hand or electric they are great if you are breastfeeding and want to express some milk for bottles. But don't rush out and buy one until you know whether or not you will be sticking with breastfeeding as they can cost a lot, especially the electric ones. Some sterilizing kits come with a breast pump which is really handy.

- Baby shoes. They are so cute but really not needed. Socks will do just fine.

- Baby monitor. Baby will most likely be at your side most of them time, sleeping near you or on you and at night they will be in the same room. So not essential to get straight away. (Although if you're anything like me and my husband and get a little paranoid. Get one).

- Changing table. If you don't have much space at home, don't bother. We put his changing mat on top of the drawers in his room and just make sure we're careful. You can always use the floor too.

- Toys and Teddies. You will without a doubt have at least 1 or 2 people buy you toys and/or teddies so don't bother. Baby doesn't care straight away either until they are more aware of their surroundings so just wait on that one.

 I'm sure I have forgotten things so feel free to send me some more to add to the lists! But this is a good start to get going with.

[mylifeofmum-blog]

I'll sleep when mummy's awake...

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Sleep... What is that?

Those of you without children may have heard, and those of you with children will know that sleep is as illusive as the loch ness monster. To be fair, I have had it easier than some as my boy is pretty good with sleep and I don't remember the last time I had a full nights sleep anyway so whats a few extra minutes or hours less than usual!? Newborn, he was like clockwork, every 2-3 hours and I was up and at em, changing his nappy and feeding him. My average sleep was 5 (broken) hours a night but I was surprisingly ok. I knew this was what I signed up for so I cracked on. Now, when you have a new baby, the one thing you will always hear, without question 'make sure you sleep when baby sleeps!' It starts to grate on you, but I understand the reasoning. But for me, unless it was a particularly rare rough night, the tiredness didn't hit till early the next evening so I was fine through the day. Plus if I napped when he did, I would never get anything done! Who would tidy and put the washing on? When would I get some me time? I've also been so crap at being able to sleep in the day, takes me ages to fall asleep then it doesn't last long anyway so it wasn't for me! I know a lot of people would say stuff the tidying! Wish I could but I hate an untidy home and no child of mine will stop me keeping it that way. He's even been on his play mat in the kitchen with me whilst I give the room a quick once over or snoozing in his sling! Cleaning on the other hand can wait a bit longer. No time for many spring cleans these days, tidying will have to do! Baby quickly got himself into an even better routine of less night feeds which suited me fine. Now he goes to bed at 9.30 wakes at 6.30 for food. Great right? Wrong! He has always been a bit of a fidgety sleeper but in the past month he is fidgeting more and more. I'm up about 6 times trying to stop him, it works every time until between 4-6 where the fidgeting hits new highs. It's almost non stop and it disturbs him which in turn disturbs me. By the 3rd time of pulling him back down his cot as his legs have moved him further and further into side, I usually give up and get him back in bed with me. It doesn't exactly stop him but putting my arm over him and being able to settle him without hanging over the side of the cot, seems to help. I've tried most things I can think of, feeding him water before bed instead, not letting him nap too close to bed time, giving him a feed halfway through the night. Doesn't work. The best thing I've found so far is to scoop him up , hold him really close and rock him. I got nearly 9 hours of (broken) sleep last night. I know I'm mega lucky compared to some but if I could just get him to actually stay asleep that whole time, it would be amazing! I will find the trick! I really will! To the sleep deprived mummys and daddys.. You can do it! It may be hard now, but it will get better. Sometimes you will feel like you don't know how you're going to make it through the day but you will! You're all doing an amazing job! It helps to speak to other mummy friends, any friend is great but the ones who have been/are going through it, are the best as it makes you feel less alone. If you don't have friends with babies, there are plenty of amazing chat forums full of parents who are in the same boat! Lack of sleep aside. When your baby smiles up at you, you forget everything. You forget that they only just woke you up an hour ago, you'll forget that they haven't had a long enough nap. When they smile up at you, It's the best feeling and you'll love it. You'll remember why you became a parent.

[mylifeofmum-blog]

One thing to be aware of when co-sleeping is that no matter how small these babies are, they take up a hell of a lot of room! (I must also say that yes, I am aware he is on his front. Something that is not advised and I don't particularly like, but it's the only way he'll sleep!)