mykelneedssleep

[mykelneedssleep]

If there is one thing I hate about college it is discussion post responses. Why are we all gassing each other up for a few paragraphs that are mediocre at best? How is "I really enjoyed your description of xyz" actually helping me learn anything at all?

[mykelneedssleep]

Just a fic where Neil’s mom dies when he’s like 11-12 and he wanders the streets for a bit before getting picked up by social services and put in the foster system and meets a young Andrew but for whatever reason they get separated (and maybe this happens a few times). Eventually a few years later he sees Andrew again except Andrew isn’t acting like himself and he’s not responding to Neil and all and this is extremely confusing for a moment until Andrew turns to face him head on and Neil realizes that even though they look identical, this is not Andrew and this boy- Aaron, he confusedly tells Neil his name is- has no idea who Andrew is but it does kick off Aaron’s search for his brother. When the three of them are united again Aaron hates Neil because without him he would’ve never known he had a brother and his life would be normal and fine, and if he hates him a little more because Andrew immediately latches back on to Neil like they never separated despite not saying more than a few sentences to Andrew the whole time they’ve known each other no one needs to know

[mykelneedssleep]

shoutout to neil josten for juggling all of That™ and college because i just started college and i already kinda wanna kms

(but also im in technical college so i have 9 classes instead of four like neil but shhh)

[mykelneedssleep]

I love when people talk about not holding grudges and letting go of anger and all that stuff because you’re absolutely right but also you couldn’t pry my grudges from my cold dead hands. Three years ago I took a literature course where we had to peer grad papers and I got randomly assigned the same guy 3 times in a row and he was one of those people who used excessive adjectives to up his word count, and at one point wrote triple the requirement meaning I had to do triple the work grading. All that to say that to this very day whenever someone is doing too much when writing/speaking my friends and I will bring up his name. It’s so bad my mother does it too

[mykelneedssleep]

“Jeremy rides backpack on Jean’s motorcycle” “Jerejean go for motorcycle rides together”

Jeremy and Jean physically cannot be on a motorcycle together until after they get together because they will crash. Jean may be a good driver but he would not be able to focus with Jeremy pressed up against him if they hadn’t at least kissed. Jeremy would also freak out but he’s not the one in control of the vehicle so he’s not the one we have to worry about. If they’re going to be that close to each other they have to figure some shit out real quick

[mykelneedssleep]

everybody give it up for girls with headaches

[mykelneedssleep]

most common thought: damn haha im going to have to deal with that sooner or later

[mykelneedssleep]

I can’t stop thinking about 19-20 year old Nicky getting called into a guidance counselors office because they’re not quite sure what to do with Andrew. He has never turned in a single piece of homework and doesn’t seem to care about or show interest in anything in particular but he’s still passing all his classes because he somehow has perfect scores on every single test. They thought he was cheating at first but they’ve secretly been giving him papers that are different from everyone else in the rooms’ to test that theory and he blows through them at a speed that makes it seem like he’s choosing answers at random but every answer he picks is correct. The school isn’t sure what to do with him because even though his test scores are exceptional he is still required to do homework and he’s gotten into a few fights with other students but he doesn’t accept any disciplinary action from the school. And none of this makes sense to them because they don’t have these kind of problems with Aaron, and yes they’re aware the twins grew up separately but they are still twins after all. And Nicky— stressed, overwhelmed, and way in over his head with two traumatized teenage boys— desperately wants to say that he’ll talk to him about it, even though he’s never managed to get Andrew to say more than a few words to him at a time, and he’ll get it handled because that’s what a guardian would do. Instead he utters one simple sentence with a voice so quiet and cracked that the counselor isn’t even sure the words are meant for them. He doesn’t even mean to say it, it’s just that he’s seen Andrew memorize things in a split second and pull information from a seemingly infinite well of knowledge in his head, and he doesn’t know what to do with any of it because Andrew is so closed off from everything. He says “I think he’s a genius.”

[mykelneedssleep]

When a small kid decks their shit and starts screaming, it's apparently useful to ask them "are you more scared or more hurt?" because they might actually pause the shrieking to understand that adults might not automatically know what they are feeling, and that they can and should use words to communicate whether they need emotional support or medical attention.

I wonder if it could be applied to tumblr. Asking shrieking people "are you disagreeing with what OP said, or are you mad about the way they worded it?"

[mykelneedssleep]

I’ve never felt more connected to Neil Josten than I have this past month after I had hip surgery because I am so capable of doing all the things I want to do including going back to ballet full time along with all the many other things I do but everyone is constantly yelling at me not to do things because I “need to give my body time to heal”

[mykelneedssleep]

No but imagine how trippy life would’ve been for Andrew if Neil had never returned from the nest after winter. Like you spend months with this strange boy who’s story doesn’t add up right and who pulls away from everyone except you and when he’s not around you convince yourself that your drug addled brain made at least parts of it up because who in their right mind would ever act like that and respond to you the way he does? Then you go away for a few months and when you return to your team this mysterious boy isn’t there anymore and everything makes sense because of course it was all just a side effect of the drugs and you’re not going to make yourself seem insane by asking about it. But something’s different about your team, they’re almost acting like they’ve lost someone and weirdly you feel that same sort of loss but it must just be the lack of an artificial high that’s making you feel that way. And then spring rolls around and he’s standing across the court from you even more vibrant than before even though he’s dressed in all black. But it’s not him. It can’t be him because Neil Josten’s hair didn’t have that reddish hue to it, and his eyes weren’t that color, his skin wasn’t that pale, and he didn’t have that tattoo under his eye, and his jersey didn’t say Wesninski on the back, and he wouldn’t let Jean Moreau keep a bruising grip on his arm. But Kevin suddenly looks like he’s going to be sick, and Renee’s intake of breath is a little too startled, and Matt is cursing, and Riko Moriyama’s smile is a little too smug when he looks in your direction. And it has to be him because your eyes meet and you’d recognize that look of barely concealed panic anywhere before he turns away, his new tattoo now facing you head on. It has to be him because the way he runs across the court is unnervingly similar to the way Neil Josten ran from the parking lot of Fox Tower day after day. You can’t get a close up look at him because the Ravens’ nurse corrals him into a hallway before he can line up for the handshake even though he can’t possibly be injured because you watched him all game and he wouldn’t even let Kevin and Dan within spitting distance let alone close enough to cause him any harm but it is him. The bus ride home is filled with questions and overlapping sentiments of anger but Kevin’s distinct silence can only mean one thing. He’s gone and he’s not coming back and Kevin knew.

[mykelneedssleep]

Y’all I gotta ask this. What’s up with all the aftg fans in law? I’ve seen a bunch of different people who are either lawyers or in law school currently and as someone considering going into law I have to know if we’ve all got some weird connection or what

[mykelneedssleep]

scars in fiction: I got this trying to save my lover from an assassin- but tragically, I was too late. now I carry the mark of my failure with me always, and I can never forget~

scars in real life: so I was trying to open macaroni sauce with a paring knife

[mykelneedssleep]

Dead wife flashback but it’s just Kevin every time Jean is brought up in conversation

[mykelneedssleep]

A late happy pride month to whatever the fuck Jacobi and Kepler had going on.

[mykelneedssleep]

“i asked chatgpt” well i asked the voidfish and they said ^̴̲͂%̵̬̀+̵̨̈#̴̗̔*̶̟͐#̷̤̀^̷̙̈́#̵̮̇€̵̖͐#̸̖́+̵̻̅#̵̮͝*̵͇͛#̸̫́ #̸̠͠^̴̲͂%̵̬̀+̵̨̈#̴̗̔*̶̟͐#̷̤̀^̷̙̈́#̵̮̇€̵̖͐#̸̖́+̵̻̅#̵̮͝*̵͇͛#̸̫́ #̸̠͠^̴̲͂%̵̬̀+̵̨̈#̴̗̔*̶̟͐#̷̤̀^̷̙̈́#̵̮̇€̵̖͐#̸̖́+̵̻̅#̵̮͝*̵͇͛#̸̫́ #̸̠͠^̴̲͂%̵̬̀+̵̨̈#̴̗̔*̶̟͐#̷̤̀^̷̙̈́#̵̮̇€̵̖͐#̸̖́+̵̻̅#̵̮͝*̵͇͛#̸̫́ #̸̠͠^̴̲͂%̵̬̀+̵̨̈#̴̗̔*̶̟͐#̷̤̀^̷̙̈́#̵̮̇€̵̖͐#̸̖́+̵̻̅#̵̮͝*̵͇͛#̸̫́

[mykelneedssleep]

I just want all people who knew what career they wanted from a young age to know that I hate them and am simultaneously so jealous of them. What do you mean I’m about to go into my last year of college with two separate and completely unrelated majors that I like but chose because I didn’t know what I wanted to do and now I have to figure what to do with grad school because I still don’t know what I actually want to do and some of you have known what career you want since you were like 7? Life is so unfair