mourningstcr

[mourningstcr]

  𝐓𝐈𝐌𝐄𝐁𝐀𝐌 𝐌𝐄 𝐃𝐄 𝐓𝐄 𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐈𝐑𝐄 𝐀𝐌𝐎𝐑𝐄 . @calamitism prayed ; [ 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐩 ] : sender is telling receiver they "deserve better than whatever this is".

❝  well  -  but  -  !  ❞

pale  hands  entwined  with  a  chunk  of  his  robes,  twisting  and  twisting  and  twisting  nervously.  he  doesn’t  like  this  conversation.  he  doesn’t  like  whatever  Lilith  is  trying  to  convey.  he’s  happy,  isn’t  he?  so  terribly,  terribly  happy?

he  has  a  house.  a  beautiful  house,  decorated  with  all  the  best  knickknacks  he’s  collected  over  the  centuries.  a  soft,  fluffy  bed;  a  neat  little  study  in  the  attic,  with  a  neat  little  window  he  can  see  all  of  heaven  from.  it’s  homey,  and  comfortable,  and  it’s  all  his.  so  many  people  living  don’t  have  even  that.

and  he  has  friends!  he  has  adam,  and  lute,  and  abel  and  peter  and  the  exorcists;  he  has  emily.  he  has  the  little  children  of  heaven  that  he  takes  under  his  wing,  literally  and  figuratively,  playing  and  singing  to  their  hearts  content.  he  loves  them  all  til  his  heart’s  bursting.

he  has  his  job.  he  has  his  responsibilities.  he  has  his  loved  ones  and  his  playtime  and  his  appointments,  and  good  food  and  good  company  and  good  entertainment  at  his  fingertips.  he  has  everything  he  could  ever  possibly  desire.

so  why  is  he  crying? a  loud  sob  bursts  forth  without  his  bidding,  fat  tears  rolling  down  his  cheeks.  whether  or  not  he  wants  to  admit  it,  something  in  his  life  is  missing.  he  just  …  he  can’t  find  it. star  wrings  his  hands  around  his  robes,  then  buries  his  face  inside  them  -  ashamed. ❝  i  don’t  know  !  i  don’t  know  what  you  want  from  me  . . .  ❞

[mourningstcr]

  𝐓𝐈𝐌𝐄𝐁𝐀𝐌 𝐌𝐄 𝐃𝐄 𝐓𝐄 𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐈𝐑𝐄 𝐀𝐌𝐎𝐑𝐄 . @evulosie prayed ; you're burning up .

he doesn’t like the way he feels right now , but he’d argue only a little against the term burning . his body manifests such grievances in particular ways - internally , he is boiling in his own skin , but externally ? star’s flesh is icy marble , condensation like sweat beading up along his forehead , his neck , his clammy palms . he doesn’t burn , he freezes . crystalizes .

but he understands her point .

❝ and ? ❞ he remarks , a little snappier than he’d like . star is already struggling to stay alert , or alert-adjacent , and he really doesn’t need someone interrupting his flow . he squints hard at the blueprint perched on his desk , examines the trembling lines and haphazard eraser blemishes so unlike his usual work , and sighs . he wants to finish this . needs to finish this . when did lute crawl into his study anyway ? why ?

his eyes flutter to the clock in the corner , and star scowls , massaging the bridge of his nose . she must’ve been fetching him for lunch in adam’s absence - a thought that provokes a thick swallow . he doesn’t want to eat . he just wants to finish this , however long it might take. he can’t let anyone down . ❝ i’m - i’ll - ooh , uh . . . “ dizzy . dizzy , dizzy . the lump in his throat is remarkably unhelpful . ❝ i’ll come down soon . soon-ish . you all start without me , okay ? ❞

[mourningstcr]

STAR’S  CONSTITUTION  is  delicate  at  best. 

while  he  doesn’t  exactly  possess  an  immune  system,  he  does  suffer  ill  consequences  from  his  monthly  “  treatments  “  (  similar  to  electroconvulsive  therapy,  with  a  focus  on  memory  redevelopment  and  mood  maintenance  ).  most  of  the  side  effects  are  similar,  with  star  experiencing  muscle  aches,  nausea,  confusion,  and  small-scale  absent  seizures  in  the  first  few  hours  post-treatment.  sometimes  it’s  accompanied  with  a  low-grade  fever  or  more  aggressively  flu-like  symptoms  within  the  following  week.  they’re  always  followed  with  nightmares.

[mourningstcr]

  𝐓𝐈𝐌𝐄𝐁𝐀𝐌 𝐌𝐄 𝐃𝐄 𝐓𝐄 𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐈𝐑𝐄 𝐀𝐌𝐎𝐑𝐄 . @evulosie prayed ; i'll never forgive you .

❝  i  …  i  didn’t  mean  to.  ❞

is  he  talking  about  the  mug,  or  something  farther  away  ?  when  he  stares  at  the  shards  scattered  about  their  feet,  what  does  he  really  see?  star’s  hands  tremble,  gazing  down  at  a  pool  of  lukewarm  coffee  and  alphabet  soup  ceramic,  pieces  that  once  read  #1  lieutenant  dashed  to  nonsense  on  angelic  tiles.

❝  i  didn’t  mean  to.  ❞

there  is  lightning  behind  his  eyes  and  a  storm  cloud  brewing  in  his  skull.  Thunder  rolls  across  the  trampled  fields  of  his  mind  -  chasing  a  memory.  Star’s  eyes  are  glossy  and  distant  as  he  falls  to  his  knees,  picking  through  the  pieces  with  desperation.

he  can  put  it  back  together.  he  can  fix  it.

don’t  hate  him,  please  don’t  hate  him,  he’s  so  sorry. golden  ichor  joins  the  fray,  cut  and  bloodied  hands  grasping,  molding,  trying,  trying,  trying  to  affix  the  pieces  back  into  place.  it's  a  pointless  battle,  yet  one  he's  willing  to  face,  if  only  for  her  sake.  only  ever  for  her  sake. ❝  I  didn’t  mean  to,  lute.  I  didn’t  mean  it.  please,  you  have  to  believe  me  !  ❞

[mourningstcr]

CARING FOR THE SICK PROMPTS.

i found this list and kinda fed into it each time i got the flu or a migraine, and u know what, it's just me revealing just how much i love the caring threads and the soft threads and the fondly exasperated "let me help you" threads! use at your pleasure, DO NOT ADD TO THE LIST NOR EDIT IT! i will be changing it accordingly!

" i found you passed out in the kitchen. you wanna stop working yourself so hard? or do i need to keep hitting the gym to carry you to bed every day? "

" you're burning up. "

" your neighbour called me and said you could use a nurse. looks like they were right, too. "

" you were told to take it easy, so... yeah. this is kinda on you. "

" you took a sick day. you NEVER take a sick day. so yeah, i got worried, and i figured i'd come over and keep an eye on you. "

" you texted me a long and incoherent text that held about 90% of the emoji list and about four different languages. figured it wouldn't hurt to drop by and see how you were doing. "

" how long have you been sick for? and don't lie. "

" you look like hell. "

" i brought you some soup; let me heat some up for you? "

" okay. it's time you went to the hospital. "

" hey… hello there, sleeping beauty. you gave me a bit of a scare yesterday. how are you feeling? "

" i swear, if you even think of getting out of that bed… "

" you know when i said to call if it's an emergency? a fever is most DEFINITELY considered an emergency! "

" if you think you're going to work like this, you better think again. "

" don't worry. my family swears by this remedy; just let it work its magic and you'll feel good as new in no time. "

" I don't care about getting sick. i'm not leaving you until you're back to full health. "

" you didn't stop to think that this might happen when you're burning the candle at both ends? "

" yeah, I can play the role of nurse AND say "I told you so" at the same time, actually. "

" you better drink every last drop of this tea, no matter how disgusting it is. "

" i told my boss it was an emergency so they've given me a full week to look after you. "

" quit being so stubborn and get into BED! "

" what part of doctor's orders hasn't sunk in yet? bed rest! for the WEEK! "

" right, where do you keep your saucepans? i'm going to make you my famous noodle soup. it's a cure-all, i'm telling you! "

" hey, unless you're going to the bathroom or the sofa, I don't want to see you out of that bed. got it? "

" when are you gonna start letting people look after you, huh? "

" i know, i know, i turned off all the lights once i figured you had the migraine. you want some tea? water? "

" don't be mad, but i saw your fridge, and... it frightened me. so i've taken you back to my place, and i'm gonna get deliveroo to bring some groceries to your place tomorrow. okay? "

" i know your appetite is a little off, so i ordered in a whole tonne of options. just try a little bit of something, please? for me? "

" i've brought half a pharmacy, enough movies and boardgames to last us a decade, and every single snack i could fit into the basket at the grocery store. so sit your butt down, eat your soup, and try and make the most of your bed rest for the next week, will you? "

ACTION PROMPTS ( SEND THE FULL LINE! and feel free to reverse if u wish! ):

[ TOUCH ]: sender gently rests a hand against the receiver's forehead to check their temperature.

[ DAMP ]: sender presses a cool cloth against the receiver's face, neck and forehead to try and lower their fever.

[ BLANKET ]: sender wraps another blanket around the receiver to try and stop them from shivering.

[ SPOON ]: sender gently coaxes spoons of soup into the receiver's mouth to build up their strength after an illness.

[ CARRY ]: sender, finding the receiver weakened/unconscious on the floor, immediately lifts them up and carries them back to bed.

[ AROUND ]: sender keeps a protective arm around the receiver to help them walk without the risk of stumbling or collapsing.

[ STAY ]: sender decides to stay by the receiver's bedside after learning that they're sick.

[ HAIR ]: sender smooths back the receiver's hair in a soothing gesture to try and help them go back to sleep.

[ TILT ]: sender tips a bottle of water up for the receiver to sip from.

[ HUM ]: sender hums/sings to soothe a sick receiver back to sleep.

[ BACK ]: sender gently rubs the receiver's back, either to soothe them or warm them while they're unwell.

[ SHARE ]: sender climbs into the receiver's sickbed with them, wrapping their arms around them to offer warmth and comfort.

[ SHOWER ]: sender, learning the receiver has a high fever, takes a cold shower with them in order to lower their temperature.

[ WAKEN ]: the receiver wakes up in bed, having been found unconscious by the sender and carried into the bed from the floor.

[ QUARANTINE ]: the sender and receiver, both being sick, decide to quarantine together and spend the recovery period with each other.

[mourningstcr]

reverse starter call ! begging everyone to send me stuff or plot or whatever you want. this is your free pass. go ham.

[mourningstcr]

also like this for me to raid your inbox with some prompts

[mourningstcr]

I think once I get home I’m gonna make star his own main blog, I love him too much to let him linger over here.

[mourningstcr]

𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐢 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝: a little assortment of prompts revolving around painful, bottled up affection and endless yearning, as well as the possible result of finally taking action. remember to tag your dark themes. add +reverse to swap the roles.

[ 𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐠 ] : receiver notices sender looking at them longingly. [ 𝐝𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐦 ] : receiver hears sender calling their name while asleep. [ 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐦𝐭𝐡 ] : sender drapes a coat / cape / etc. around receiver's shoulders. [ 𝐬𝐜𝐞𝐧𝐭 ] : receiver is hugging a coat / cape / etc. that belongs to the sender. [ 𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐦 ] : sender is helping the receiver through a panic attack / severe anxiety. [ 𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐝 ] : sender takes a hold of receiver's both hands. [ 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐭 ] : sender and receiver are spooning for comfort and warmth. [ 𝐚𝐥𝐦𝐨𝐬𝐭 ] : sender and receiver are finally about to kiss, but are interrupted. [ 𝐭𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞 ] : sender and receiver are finally sharing a passionate kiss. [ 𝐟𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝 ] : sender has just found the receiver who's been missing for weeks. [ 𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐬 ] : after being misinformed that the sender has died, receiver is grieving. [ 𝐥𝐨𝐮𝐝 ] : sender is expressing anger over receiver's constant recklessness. [ 𝐣𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐨𝐮𝐬 ] : sender is voicing their negative opinion about a person who appears to be close with the receiver. [ 𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐞 ] : sender has just told receiver "you belong to me". [ 𝐰𝐡𝐲 ] : sender has just asked receiver "why don't you love me". [ 𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐭 ] : sender has harmed someone who threatened the receiver. [ 𝐠𝐫𝐢𝐦 ] : sender has killed someone who threatened the receiver. [ 𝐡𝐮𝐫𝐭 ] : sender has gotten injured protecting the receiver. [ 𝐚𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐞 ] : sender is getting frustrated with their repressed affection and asks receiver to leave them alone. [ 𝐜𝐫𝐮𝐞𝐥 ] : unable to handle their fondness towards receiver, the sender lashes out and they end up in a heated argument. [ 𝐚𝐩𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐲 ] : sender is apologising for appearing cold. [ 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐩 ] : sender is telling receiver they "deserve better than whatever this is".

[mourningstcr]

actions speak louder than words non - verbal / action prompts from yours truly. (add a "swap" to swap the sender/receiver in the prompt (or just do it manually).)

back, sender gives receiver a back hug.

beckon, sender beckons receiver closer with a finger.

blood, sender cleans blood off of receiver.

book, sender helps receiver get a book from a higher part of the shelf.

care, sender takes care of receiver when they're sick.

catch, sender catches receiver by the waist after they bump into each other.

choke, sender saves receiver from choking by giving them the heimlich.

cold, sender places their jacket over receiver's shoulders.

cry, sender wipes tears off receiver's face with their thumbs.

dance, sender sticks a hand out to receiver and invites them to dance.

dip, sender skinny dips in front of receiver and invites them to join.

dog, sender's dog pulls them in receiver's direction.

drive, sender drives receiver somewhere in their car.

drag, sender drags receiver into a room and closes the door behind them.

draw, sender draws receiver like one of their french girls.

face, sender turns receiver's face towards them.

flower, sender gives receiver a flower.

footsie, sender initiates footsie with receiver under the table.

forehead, sender presses their forehead against receiver's.

grab, sender grabs receiver's wrist to stop them from leaving.

jump, sender jumps onto receiver's back.

kiss, sender kisses receiver.

link, sender links arms with receiver while walking.

massage, sender offers receiver a massage.

patch, sender patches up receiver's wounds.

piano, sender teaches receiver how to play the piano.

pin, sender pins receiver's hands behind their back.

pluck, sender plucks something out of receiver's hair.

press, sender presses receiver against a wall.

propose, sender proposes to receiver.

quiet, sender gestures for receiver to be quiet.

rest, sender rests their head on receiver's shoulder.

serenade, sender serenades receiver with a song.

sign, sender walks into a sign and receiver sees.

size, sender measures the size of their hand against receiver's.

shoes, sender removes receiver's shoes for them.

sun, sender rubs sunblock onto receiver's back.

tattoo, sender gives receiver a tattoo.

tie, sender helps tie receiver's tie.

tuck, sender tucks receiver's hair behind their ear.

umbrella, sender lets receiver under their umbrella.

warning, sender presses a knife against receiver's neck as a warning.

zip, sender needs receiver's help to zip up the back of their dress.

[mourningstcr]

Send '🤒' for sender's muse to find the reciever's muse visibly ill and attempting to work through/hide it

(add + for the reverse!)

[mourningstcr]

I want to do more with my boy. what do I do with my boy.

[mourningstcr]

cont. from here with ( @evulosie ) .

❝ oh, ❞ star says softly.

he always speaks softly , and moves softly , and exists in a cloud of airy softness that rests upon him like an ill-fitting jacket . sometimes he hates it - this inability to eek towards callousness , for better or worse. sometimes he wishes he could be a little more . . . more . he’d give the world to not be special , to be perfect as he is, to not be scolded or challenged or condemned every time he opened his mouth. not that others are necessarily cruel to him, but he sees it in their eyes - frustration , confusion , an inability to meet him where he stands .

maybe this pain in his heart and head would wain if he could just behave himself .

❝ I s’pose you weren’t. we weren’t, ❞ he corrects himself, though he doesn’t exactly look pleased about it. ❝ I don’t think i was ever much of a kid, either, but . . . y’know. ❞

[mourningstcr]

gilded skies 💫🪽

[mourningstcr]

🐝  *  ―  𝑺𝑯𝑰𝑷𝑷𝑰𝑵𝑮 𝑺𝑯𝑬𝑬𝑻.

send 🚢 or ( 'SHIP' ) if you ever considered shipping our characters romantically and want me to fill out the following form for our muses. bold all that definitely applies, italicize what could potentially apply. feel free to add more if you think certain options are missing or you just want to add more.

do i ship our characters together?: yes | no | not yet but maybe soon

would i like to ship with you?: yes | maybe, i'm willing to try | no

type of relationship i could see: childhood or high school sweethearts | exes | engaged | married | long-term relationship | crushes | unrequited love | fling | long distance | online relationship | just dating | new relationship | toxic lovers | friends with benefits

tropes i'd enjoy writing for them: friends to lovers | enemies to lovers | exes to lovers | fake relationship / dating | forbidden love | grumpy and sunshine | star-crossed lovers | surprise pregnancy | second chance | soulmates | amnesia / mistaken identity | forced proximity | secret relationship | slow burn relationship

would i rather plot first or jump right in and see where it goes?: develop their relationship first | jump right in | something in between ( what specifically? )

what now?: let's plot something | send me shippy memes | i'll send you shippy memes | write me a random starter | i'll write you a random starter

anything else i want you to know about me / my character / my shipping habits: ( put whatever you want here )

[mourningstcr]

[mourningstcr]

tag drop.