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Session 10 -- Nov. 29, 2016
Professor Charmington
Faced with the freezy-paralysis caused by some sort of arterial glass-man filled with sand, you guys used sweet talks and fascinating rods to force it to stand down. Jisu was freed, Russet broke its chains, and it left and touched the 4-dimensional tree and disappeared. Chronia didn't seem to care or notice.
Everyone got stuff! There was dragonhide armor, Shatterspike, a Boulder hammer, and a shock dagger. Also, some dispel magic and a CLW wand at level 3 with 15 charges.
Luchadoriole saw a ruby hummingbird and ignored it. Everyone heard discordant, upsetting singing and decided to follow it east. You found a sentient, southern-drawl-y rocking pig who you named Professor Charmington, Pig.H.D. He/she joined the cast of sentient objects along with Visic and Vartik. He/she mentioned Aeldefadred the Glyph Witch and Rinaldini aka Ringatoni, in response to "why are all these bird-men here?"
You guys found a room containing an ongoing fight: 6 bird-men were corralling a 10-foot-tall bronze peacock spewing darkness clouds into the norther corner of a room, while skeletons of dead bird-men assaulted them. You think the bronze bird made them dead. They all ran to the southeast exit, while the singing remains to the north.
I guess you guys are trying to find a way out now, after learning that Dendrosathol is an arch-devil. Who knows though.
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Session 9 -- Nov. 21, 2016
That dumb rope
This time I prepped 12 different directions but missed #13 and you guys took #13. You win! You won the game. That was the game.
Anyway Classy wanted to know where to go, so she drank the Whiskey of the Heavy Moors and was pointed in either of 2 directions: she felt hopeful about the center-south room from Chronia's room, but duty-bound towards the east door. Everyone saw lights and went east.
After messing with a 4-dimensional weeping willow the bard saw a cardboard box and ran at it. The box was filled with suicide notes from depressed artists. A rope nearby animated and tried to hang him and everyone else, and we completed a 45 minute combat with a 4-foot-long rope. I think Jisu ate some rope, everyone else burned/chopped it until it couldn't do anything else.
You guys found a being made out of glass tubes where blood vessels would be, which were filled with flowing colory sand. In front were 4 paralyzed Oku (birdmen). The glassy-tubey thing was chained to the wall with golden links, spoke to all of you as "Fulvious," and demanded release, promising rewards. Upon denial, he released one of the Oku and paralyzed Jisu.
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Session 8 -- Nov. 7, 2016
Infodump
Warning: long. Ignore stuff past the line if metaplot is boring
This week, we resolved the mystery of the golden scarab- turns out it was made of animated paper. Luchadoriole flipped it upside down and people stabbed and punched and set papers on fire, and Otto got a note from it! Levalliant G claims that you guys are on the "right" path, and to NOT trust the three sisters.
You guys disassembled the husk of the scarab and hid it in some piles of clothes (150 lb of solid but questionable gold) and took its concave ruby eyes (3,000g each.)
Given the following choices:
Room with magic pancakes
White tiled room with a line from north->south
Room with floating magic figure
Room with chalk-drawn pentagram
Giant room with a solid inch of sand
Otto chose to telepathically poke the white tile, which squiggled the line into his greatest fear: tall people. That was too weird, so you all entered the sand room and met Chronia and her "dog" who was way into Classy, and playfully bit her a couple times. NBD.
Chronia messes with time but can't control it, things age and decay the closer you get to her. One of Luchadoriole's feathers fell off. She wears gold and opaque glass, drinks from gold or glass cups, and plays a set of golden pipes. She wants to be normal and live normally but can't and doesn't know what to do about it. She used to be pen pals/close friends with Psytherella (medusa) but hasn't heard back in a while.
Chronia claims that Dendrosathol, the man you all came here to rescue, is an arch-devil bound inside a phylactic puzzle-box by sorcerors employed by Psytherella. Chronia is not aware of any way in or out of the maze.
THE LINE
Metaplot stuff:
Chronia Torn has two sisters: Zamia and Charity
All three sisters are hypothetically ageless and will never die
All three have been alive for thousands of years
In ancient history, they were a part of a cabal central to a theocratic government, but the presence of immortal "perfect" people cause a whole bunch of violence and problems
Their advisors Xanthoceras, Draco Scabra, and Sophronia Wort tricked the three into entering Psytherella's maze, knowing none of them would ever leave, hoping to restore balance
The sisters' disappearance caused something called the Nyctocaust, which destroyed their empire
The big head with the inscription from Session 7 is the center of the maze, and while it was constructed in the physical world, it has since been "removed"
Zamia's power revolves around obsession, Charity's around peace
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Session 7 -- Oct. 31, 2016
Mr Skeltal
Doot
This time, Otto, Classy, Russet, Jisu, and BD Wong smelled some stuff. They followed their noses to incense and also found some bird-men, represented by skeleton models. Some were invisible!
After stabbing/punching/confusing/slashing everything to death, they found some loot: I think it was a Cloak of Resistance +1 that looked like a bird costume, Bracers of Armor +1 with little eagles on them, and some money or something. There was a key, too, I think. #54.
They found some skeletons that weren't skeletons and, upon realizing that they could animate them/cast spells with them as if they were golems or something by putting liquid in their heads, removed both heads and peed in one like a whole bunch. I forget how, but somehow you guys are traveling with these skulls filled with liquid. Visic and Vartik are their names, and they have terrible voices that I should work on.
You brought the plastic heads to a bigger stone head and found the inscription listed at the bottom of this post. After trying to communicate with bighead, everyone moved on and Otto was subsequently attacked by a 5-foot-long scarab made of gold and rubies with scrolls falling out of its plates.
“Set Watch I Was, By The Elephant King.
And Many Of My Brothers Now Gone.
Then The Lizards And Their Books.
They Ruled For One Thousand Years.
Then Came The Medusa.
And Bred A Maze From Flesh And Frozen Bone.
Then Three Sisters And Their Court.
I Have Not Seen The Sea For Many Years.
Or Heard The Sound Of Waves.
Now You Come.
Are You Those Sent To End This Land?
As The Elephant King Promised You Would?”
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Session 6 -- Oct. 24, 2016
https://youtu.be/Kas6akz1jWU24OCT/16
This week I made George Michael canon in the Medusa-verse. Otto, Kreoss, Classy, and Jisu stabbed a Frankenstein's monster's molerat-face and took a lot of acid cloud damage in doing so. They hurt their weapons, then found a bar at a nearby wedding (though found no patrons.)
While sampling the ludicrous amount of alcohol with funny names, Jiso smelled a fish demon and noticed a naked and anatomically correct street shark with 2 mouths enter the room, who demanded music and small earbones.
Jisu distracted him with a card trick for some reason! Kreoss cut off a head really badly! Classy gave a fuzzy gremlin sacrifice! Otto confused him! Eventually Uriel the shark-man was satisfied with Otto's music and the earbones for his statue and left.
They all met an alto pixie in a bird cage, Ysanne, who held them hostage for gossip and conversation. The following names were spoken!
Psytherella, the Medusa, Ysanne's former employer
Wercel Smallbone, Ysanne's sister
Xanthoceras, Sophronia, and Draco Scabra: all liches!
Dendrosathol, who apparently is Duergar-skinned and has 2 curvy horns, and is trapped in a box
Uriel, who put her in a cage but surely wouldn't hurt her or anything
Also everything is, as always, to the north. Unless your intention is to hunt liches… It's probably not, though.
EDIT: Below is the note found in a locked cupboard in an empty bottle:
“There is a secret door to the Reptile
Archive in Fortuna’s room. Also, this might come
in handy…”
-Levalliant G
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Session 5 -- Oct. 17, 2016
Bypahrasiventenme byMazeman eyeprononononon oooooo Mananwif!
This time, the party shrunk by a lot! I was pretty out of it. The Mansion, Luchadoriole, and Classy explored the vine tunnels for a while and found a couple things-
One of a couple things: They found 3 more chameleon reptilioids. I flubbed my diplo roll here. I think they mentioned the Levalliant Green as their leader, and mentioned the whispers of Mdaga Gognata. The PCs know that they themselves aren't supposed to be in the maze, and it's distressing these guys. All 3 escaped.
Two of a couple things: They found a root-groot with a staff who was way into marriage. He magically fascinated 2 of the lizardfolk, then blended them together. Classy and Otto used some weed killer to deal with it. Luchadoriole disappeared and CEO birdman returned to the stage. Classy killed a bunch of horrible blended things, they all met a psychic chess piece, and left. Otto took the root-groot's staff-hand and found that it was a Staff of Fascinate with 5 charges.
Everyone left and then got surprised by a rat-leopard, and saw a man fall from an unknown sky into an unknown void across bamboo foundations. Mondays are weird.
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Session 4 -- Oct. 10, 2016
Command Word: Flower
Enter: Otto, the haunted mansion
This time, we resolved a super-unexpectedly long combat with some lizard people. The group killed a scaley-cleric and his/her 2 machete wielding buddies. One got gored by Luchadoriole, one got bolted onto a viney face, and the other was interrogated and eaten by Yegg's rat.
Scale-manwomens mentioned Levalliant Green, some sort of Saturday-morning-cartoonish invincible overlord figure, and also mentioned the name Mdaga Gognata, as if they held some sort of reverence toward it. They were not forthcoming with helpful information.
Everyone moved north through a vine path looking for the cool stuff and maybe the lich Xanthoceras, but found a useless 20' tall rose instead. I made everyone try to climb inside before Kreoss cut it down and ruined my "all characters make a will save each round" fun. Classy found a terrible map and gleaned nothing from it, Yegg and the Mansion got some sense of place I think.
The Mansion was too pretty to hurt and stole a Saurid machete
Yegg did some maybe alignment shifting stuff with a rat and a bucket so I took away his agency for the rest of the session on accident I guess
Luchadoriole saw through stealthy fields and learned the heights of his own strength
Kreoss cut down a psychic flower with a big fiery stick
Classy thought super-failing a reflex save 5' off the ground while climbing a psychic acid flower was a bad thing and that made me happy
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Session 3 -- Oct. 4, 2016
Hi my name's Face
After blowing up an iceberg-heart, the group left the octagon and shut the door. Blood flow seems contained for now. They got some weed killer (4 bottles), and saw faces in some ivy/vines.
After killing a frog-man, eating his 3 legs, and taking his possessions (a bag of 24 gremlins, a wrench that breaks machines, and 1200gp in unmatching earrings,) they decided to break a waterwheel for some reason.
They tentatively accepted help from a vine-monster named Face (don't call him No-Face) who was probably a human at one point, and met his buddy Fumitory, who told them a story about Xanthoceras the lich and one of the Perfect Three, Zamia. He told everyone to head north, where they would find Aeldefadred and her coven of birds.
Also: a pun-bird named Squiggles joined the mix, with Russet Crowe returning from Barovia, our last campaign
Classy crit a frog demon and broke a waterwheel, the one functional mechanical object the group has encountered so far
B.D. went out on a limb and trusted a vine man, and got some backstory infodump
CEO Squiggles left for a while and some other bird took his place
Russet two-punched a frog to death
Jisu did some recon
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Session 2 -- Sept. 26, 2016
Vurmhat
Enter: Yegg, the archer-witch
Moving on from the pig-man, the group ran into Germander, a sapient worm. After being told that there's a lich and he's beyond some doors that "you really shouldnt open", you guys found a way to open it anyway (messing with Germander's garden.) Upon opening the door, some vinebeasts + Yegg's bolt destroyed a giant 20-foot tall heart, and created a blood fountain.
After murdering them vinebeasts, Germander, wholly upset about his garden came in to tackle the group but was killed eventually by a dolphin and a squid, with help from a bird and an egg, and also an ass. The blood in the room is 5 feet high and still coming, rushing out into the areas beyond.
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Session 1 -- Sept. 19, 2016
2-Coin Jisu
New campaign time, combining groups. Jisu, Bondi, Classy Asstrid, and (this time) Lem are given a get out of jail free card from the crumbling Lizardman empire: find a man named Dendrosathol inside a painting, bring him out alive, and they will have earned their freedom.
Bondi did stuff with lizards, Classy touched the wrong ass, and Jisu stole something important.
Jisu let a lady go, then found 2 coins in a rug while everyone talked to an art-focused Lady Capilli, who gave Bondi a pencil and paper to write a short autobiography. They found an Escher staircase and ran away, then a shadow-pit room, a garden with some too-touchy statues and vines, and a pig with a man-face. Everyone killed some people in bird masks!
Lem tried to Pied-Piper them statues
Jisu Kachoot hid from everything and everyone
Bondi electrocuted bird-person
Classy stabbed bird-person
Lem told jokes to a horrible man-pig pig-man
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