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morganofthewildfire · 2 years ago

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i can’t believe we’ve reached the end 😭 what a journey it’s been

Illicit Affair - Chapter Fifty-Two

Masterlist

A/N: I’m crying too hard to even write anything coherent…. see you guys at the epilogue

Warnings: NSFW | Word Count: 4,300

Aelin sat in the backseat of the car. It smelled new, which wasn’t surprising as Rowan had bought it less than a week ago. It was a nice, normal car. It didn’t look like his former sports car, though it shared the same black color. She had no idea why he hadn’t gone for his favorite brand of car; the Gods knew he could afford it. Perhaps it was linked to his fear. He tried to conceal it, but she saw through it. She didn’t call him out on that. He was alright, he just needed some time. And she was ready to give him as much as he needed.

As of now, her sole focus was on the crying little girl sitting beside her. It had been almost three weeks since her accident, and today was the day she was finally allowed to leave the hospital. It’d been a relief for everyone, but mostly for the little girl. Although she and Rowan had stayed by her side at all hour, that she hadn’t spent a single minute alone, it had been… stressful.

Usually, patients were discharged quickly after surgery but because of Helia’s lung wounds it had taken longer. She’d had to have reeducation to strengthen her legs again to help her stand, and doctors had wanted to oversee her because of pain when she breathed.

So, Helia had only left the hospital a few minutes ago.

They were almost home, and Aelin had chosen to sit right next to Helia, hoping to provide emotional help. She had seemed fine at first, quiet but fine, but now she was shaking with quiet tears leaving her eyes. Aelin’s heart broke, of course the girl would fear being in the car.

“When I was a kid, my sister was obsessed with this book. She had read it so many times that she could actually quote it without needing to read it. There was this character in it, and my sister used to pray to all the Gods to be this character.” That had caught Helia’s attention. “Do you want me to tell you my and her favorite quote?”

She caught Rowan’s gaze in the rearview mirror, and it was hard to decipher what was present in his eyes. It looked like pain, obviously because of Helia’s mental state, but also… pride. And maybe this one was directed at her.

“Yes, please,” Helia said, though her voice was still cracking because of her lungs problem and the intubation, and she was sure her mental distress didn’t help.

Aelin turned her attention back on the precious girl, and she smiled down at her. She stroked her forehead with a thumb, other fingers playing with her hair. She was lucky to have kept some part of her hair. The doctors had shaven parts that could be covered. “Once upon a time, in a land long since burned to ash, lived a princess who loved her kingdom very, very much.” Aelin told her daughter a story of love and passion, a story full of fairies and dragons, where love and friendship triumphed. She talked for so long that the car had stopped in front of the house for a long time before she was done. But no one moved. Helia was utterly captivated by her story.

So much that when Aelin was done, she asked, “Can I have the book?”

“But you can’t read well, baby,” Rowan said with a smile.

“How about I bring them to you, and you keep them in your room for whenever you’re old enough to read them?”

Helia smiled, “Yes, please.”

Rowan didn’t even let Helia walk into the house. He held her as if she were a princess from the moment he took her out of the car. As they passed the door, he smiled at her. “Welcome home, baby.”

Aelin thought her heart couldn’t feel warmer or fuller, but that was until she heard a familiar bark. She turned around just in time to see Fleetfoot run and throw herself on Aelin, glad to be reunited. She knelt and probably looked like an idiot, trying to pet and hug the dog at the same time but… She’d missed her. And apparently, Fleetfoot had missed her too. She hadn’t had a minute to herself in the past weeks, even less visiting her favorite dog in the world. She felt guilty, but Aelin knew she had been in good hands with…

“It’s crazy how you two look alike,” Aedion said, just as she was thinking about him.

She glared at him, and he grinned. She wasn’t surprised to find Fenrys by his side, these days they were as attached to the hip as Rowan and her. She rose and hugged her cousin and friend. “We made lots of pastries for the girl of the hour, so you’ll have to calm down that healthy nut that’s her father.”

Aelin laughed, “I think I can convince him to forget about his rules for a while.”

Fenrys and Aedion had been nice enough to come and set up everything for Helia, like changing her game into a temporary bedroom so she wouldn’t have to use the stairs every day. It would be hard for her to do so for a while.

Fenrys kissed her cheek and went to check on Helia, leaving Aelin and Aedion together in the kitchen. That way, Helia is being taken care of by a very overbearing father and a very overbearing uncle. “How are you doing?” Aedion asked.

She took a deep breath. “Good. I’m happy that she is back.”

“You look better,” he said, guiding her into the kitchen so he can show everything they baked. Though Aelin suspected they had simply bought these. She knew all too well that her cousin was as bad as she was when it came to food.

“Thank you,” she said. Bought or made, the intention was very thoughtful. “And I do feel better, too. These past few weeks have been hard, I must admit.”

“Of course, they were,” he said. “I’m so impressed by your strength, you know. So many people would have run.”

She didn’t say anything for a while. Her first reaction had been to want to deny it but… He knew, didn’t he? He hadn’t lived with his father for years because Gavriel had run. Aelin’s mother had run, and her father had for a while before choosing to come back. She grabbed a croissant, “Yes, well. I’ve done enough running for a lifetime, don’t you think?”

He pushed her shoulder with a fist while he grinned. He was happy for her, she realized though she had known before. But it hit her then, how much she loved him, how much she had relied on him her whole life while always thinking she was alone. “You’re the best big brother I could have had, you know?”

There was a flash of emotion in his eyes, but he answered, “Of course, I’m amazing.”

She barked a laugh, shaking her head and turning her eyes toward the living room. Fenrys was holding an Xbox controller while showing Helia what the buttons on it did. Lorcan had brought over his video game console earlier this week, having promised it to Helia. she’d be spending a lot of time on the couch, so he thought she could only watch so many princesses’ movies and that she needed another distraction.

So, he bought her princesses’ games.

All these men were whipped for this girl. Even Rowan. Who, whilst watching over the cute exchange between his daughter and his friend with disapproval, had thanked Lorcan when he’d proposed that idea. Anything that made his girl happy made Rowan happy.

“I know what that look in your eyes means,” Aedion said, tearing Aelin from the scene happening just a few feet away. She turned her gaze on him, confusion spreading through her. “You’re not coming back to Varese, are you?”

She bit her lip, throwing a quick glance back to Rowan and Helia. “I meant to tell you earlier, but I didn’t have the time,” she said, giving her cousin her full attention. “Rowan asked me to stay, and I accepted. It’s my home, you know? I need to be here. But don’t worry, I’ll still pay half of the rent for a while until you fall back on your feet and—”

“Aelin,” he cut her off. “I knew it would happen, it’s okay. I don’t need your money, you know that. Plus… I’ll only stay there for two more months, until I finish my internship. After that… I’m coming back, too.”

“Oh,” she breathed. “Do you have someone to come home to?”

She knew already. They hadn’t needed to broadcast it for everyone to know, but Aelin wouldn’t mind a confirmation. Maybe a couple of juicy details, though nothing too juicy.

He grinned, and the way he glanced toward Fenrys… Oh, she was so happy for him. “We want to take things slow; you know. Lots of things to heal from but… Gods, Aelin, I’m already in fucking love with him.”

She barked a laugh. “We always fall pretty quickly, don’t we?”

“We do,” he nodded.

She put a hand on his shoulder, smiling at him. “They won’t let us hit the ground this time, you’ll see.”

---

“When are you leaving again?” Helia asked, a mouthful of rice in her mouth. She looked at Aelin, but the question wasn’t what hit her in the guts. It was the tone she used, this sad voice, as well as this sorrow in her eyes.

Aelin opened her mouth, only to close it. She didn’t really know what to say. They hadn’t had time to discuss all of this with her, and Aelin knew it had been a subject that would come up early when she came back home but she hadn’t expected Helia to ask about it just a few hours after she came home. She threw a glance at Rowan, who looked as perplexed as she was.

Aelin hesitated for a second, “Is that something you want?”

Helia shrugged, looking at her plate only. “You have your home.”

Rowan gave her a short nod, as if telling her that yes, it would be the best moment to talk to their daughter.

Perhaps they should have told her earlier but… They had wanted her entirely focused on her recovery and getting better. She had been emotional to see both Rowan and Aelin when she woke up, they didn’t want her to tire herself out when she needed a lot of energy directed toward her health.

“You dad and I talked,” Aelin said. “And we thought that maybe, if you’re okay with that, this could be my home.” Because while Aelin and Rowan wanted each other enough that it would kill them to be separated, she knew that if Helia wasn’t okay with this… They both loved her too much to impose her something she didn’t want in her house.

Helia’s head snapped up, her eyes wide. “You’d live here again? Fleetfoot too?”

As if hearing her name—which she totally did—the dog came sniffing around the table, probably hoping to catch some foot no one was paying attention to.

Aelin smiled at Helia. “Yeah, baby. If it’s okay with you.”

The girl glanced at Aelin then at her father, with her mouth slightly agape. “Did you start loving daddy again?”

Aelin’s eyes widened, she knelt in front of Helia so they could be at the same height, and she grabbed her hands. “Look at me, baby. I have never stopped loving your father or you. You are my favorite people on this planet, alright? We just both needed some time, but now we can be a family again. I’m sorry us being apart has hurt you.”

Helia’s eyes were full of tears, and Aelin’s heart was starting to be ripped in multiple pieces. The girl started crying, and her father knelt on her other side, rubbing her back. They wouldn’t tell her to stop. Aelin knew that she was finally allowing herself to show her sadness. She hadn’t truly shown that emotion in the past year. Anger, yes. But Aelin had never seen Helia really sad.

Oh; how she felt guilty for this but… This had been inevitable. Aelin had needed that time away so she could be her best self for Helia. And now she was here to patch things up.

“Promise to always stay,” Helia demanded, years on her cheeks and lifting her pinky to Aelin.

“I could never tell you no,” she smiled at Helia, and promised with her own pinky. She’d always be there now, no matter what.

---

Aelin had insisted on washing the dishes by herself. If she couldn’t cook, she could at least do this. Though she supposed buying a dishwasher could help, she was still glad she could participate in the chores.

“She’s already fast asleep,” Rowan snorted from beside her, grabbing the last plate Aelin had washed to put it back in the cupboard. It was teamwork.

Aelin stole a glance toward the living room where Helia and Fleetfoot were laying on the couch together and both two seconds away from snoring. She chuckled. “So much for the no-dog-on-the-couch rule, huh?”

He glared at her. “It’s not funny. My own daughter doesn’t respect me anymore.”

She snorted. “You just can’t tell her no.”

He shook his head and grabbed her waist, turning her and pressing her against the counter. She looked up, arching a brow. “I have to finish, Rowan.”

He narrowed his eyes and leaned in to cut the water off. “No more dishes.”

She laughed, though she didn’t fight to start again. She wrapped her arms around his neck, breathing in his scent. “Who are you and what have you done with my clean-freak boyfriend?”

“Why must you always make fun of me?”

“Offended looks good on you,” she whispered, rising on her toes to softly press her lips against his. “That frown is very, very sexy.”

“Yeah?” He breathed, cupping the back of her head, and bringing her lips to his.

The kiss wasn’t urgent, it was slow and passionate. They poured all their love in it, all the despair they had felt this past year being away from one another. She’d missed him, missed his taste, his warmth, his smell. “I love you,” she said as they parted. It wasn’t the first time she’d said it, but the truth of it still burned her eyes. “I’m so in love with you, Rowan.”

“I’m yours,” he said. “Forever and always.”

Not you’re mine. But I’m yours. It meant so, so much to her.

She pressed her head against his chest, looking at Helia and Fleetfoot. She believed she experienced peace at that moment, in the arms of the man she loved, in a warm house with a cute girl who had definitely started snoring. She pulled back, looking at Rowan. “I want it all. You, Helia… More.”

A light appeared in his slightly widened eyes. “Really?” He knew what she was talking about. About expanding their family.

She nodded, suddenly feeling shy. “I know it will be hard, that because of my infertility we might never get pregnant. It’ll be a long process but… I want it all with you if you want it all with me.”

He kissed her, both his hands cupping her cheeks. This kiss was more urgent, more desperate. As if he was trying to breathe her in. He pulled back, as breathless as she was. “I want it all with you, too, Aelin Galathynius. Kids, marriage, everything.”

And just that way, Aelin’s new life started. And she was so, so excited for this new chapter.

She glanced at Helia, then back at Rowan. “Go put her to sleep, please.”

He nodded, kissing her one last time before walking to Helia, holding her like a princess and bringing her to her new room. Rowan and Aelin had also moved rooms for the time being, sleeping in the guest room downstairs. If Helia needed anything in the middle of the night, they wanted her to be able to reach out for help. Her lungs were still damaged enough that walking too long or walking up the stairs would exhaust her, or even just be too much.

Aelin went to let Fleetfoot access to the garden for the last time of the day, but for a while didn’t move from the couch. She simply stared at Aelin, as if mad that she had taken away her sleeping buddy. Aelin frowned, “Don’t judge me.”

But the dog was totally judging her on her way to the garden. It didn’t matter. She waited five minutes for her mutt to come back, and she gave her a big kiss on the head. Then, Aelin slipped into her bedroom.

Rowan was already there, though she supposed he hadn’t been waiting for long. He was standing, back to the door, and his eyes focused on his phone. She wrapped her arms around his waist, resting her head against his back just between his shoulder blades. She felt him relax, and she couldn’t hold back her smile at that. “Hey, baby,” he said, covering her hand with his.

She let go of him only so he could turn around, his phone was gone, and he led her onto the bed, having them both lay side by side. Thank Gods she’d already hanged in her pyjamas before supper, because she felt too lazy to get up again. She snuggled closer to him, closing her eyes. “I missed having you here,” he breathed.

She lifted her head, looking at him. “I’m here now, no more missing.”

“Thank the Gods,” he said, cupping the back of her neck and bringing her lips to his. She was entirely consumed by his lips and his presence. So much, that for better access, she climbed on top of him, laying right there. That way, she had total access to his lips, to his cheeks, to his neck. “Aelin,” he breathed her name as if it were a prayer as he passed a hand through her hair, his other—now healed—hand holding her hip. “My love.”

She parted her legs so that she was now straddling him, and she slowly lowered her lips. She kissed the corner of his lips, his cheek, his chin. She left the imprint of her lips on his neck, and then lowered on his collarbone as she pushed his shirt to allow her some space to work. But when the garment became a true offense against her, she rose so that she sat on him, her fingers playing with the hem of the shirt. “Is it okay?” She asked, a little breathless.

He sat up, his chest brushing hers and he threw his shirt at the other side of the room. “Only if you get out of yours as well.”

She felt her teeth scrape at her bottom lip, and she took off the silky top she had worn until then. Rowan’s eyes darkened as he stared at her bare breasts, their ends peaked both because of the air and because of the attention he gave them. His hands were on her ribs, his thumb brushing the underside of her breasts every time he stroked her skin there. He was so, so close to her that when he spoke, his hot breath hit her skin. “You’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”

She didn’t have time to give him a witty answer, because the next second his lips were wrapped around her nipple. She gasped, her hands shooting for his hair and his shoulder, unafraid to pull and scratch. He loved being marked.

He sucked and licked, and when she felt his teeth slightly pull on the hard bud… She had to bite her lip to hold in her moans.

She was breathless and flushed by the time Rowan was done with the second bud, but he didn’t give her time to breathe. He pushed her on her shoulders, and he laid between her legs. He kissed her breasts again, then lower, and lower until he took off her shorts, as well as her underwear.

She wasn’t shy to be naked in front of him. Gods, he was the person she felt the most at ease with. But the way he looked at her then, as if it were the first time he saw her in such a state… She loved him more for that, for the appreciation showing on his features. “Rowan,” she breathed. “I need you.”

He nipped at her hip then, tearing another gasp from her. “Let me worship you first.”

And who was she to refuse him? She let him part her legs, exposing her so much that she almost turned shy. But her boldness took over once more when he lowered his face between her legs. There was no hint of shyness in her as she arched her back, holding his head right where it was as he sucked on her bundle of nerves.

She wished she could scream her pleasure boldly, but if Rowan heard her soft gasps, she was happy. These were for him alone.

He pushed a finger inside of her heat, and she already stood over the edge. It had been too long, and he was simply too good at listening to her body. She could feel him grin against her slick skin, but he didn’t stop nor did he slow down his pace. “Yes, yes, yes,” she breathed, praying that he would just keep going. She needed him to.

He pushed another finger inside of her, crooking it just the right way and then…

Waves of pleasures hit her one after another, so hard that she couldn’t breathe or see or feel anything anymore. She was just a vessel of pleasure, and she was sure she could die from this feeling.

And what a way to go.

Slowly, awareness creeped back up in her, but she wasn’t left cold and lonely. Rowan’s warmth and scent were all around her, his lips warm against her skin as he did, indeed, worship her body once more. Every kiss showed his love, his dedication to her.

“Baby,” she breathed. “Kiss me?”

She had worded it as a question, though she knew he would have never refused her. She moaned at her own taste on his tongue, at the way his lips seemed to awaken that fire in her, when she had believed to be entirely spent. She wrapped her legs around his hips, pushing his pants down with her feet. He broke the kiss to help her, and then he was naked in front of her.

Her favorite work of art.

And he was hers, hers forever and always.

“Are you sure?” He asked, as if her body wasn’t begging for more. She nodded, and he leaned in to kiss her once more. The tip of his length nudged at her folds, and she didn’t dare breathing as Rowan teased her, before sinking inside of her. It had been a given, after their earlier conversation, that he wouldn’t be wearing protection anymore. It was only him and her now.

“Fuck,” he swore, low and breathlessly. He was as undone by this as she was, by the feeling of her walls adjusting to him. The first push was always divine, but today… It felt better. “Fuck, Aelin, marry me.”

Her entire body froze, and her eyes snapped open. Only to find him directly staring at her, his eyes… It was impossible to describe everything she saw in his eyes. “What?” She breathed, and she was surprised he heard her.

He didn’t move, staying deep in her. “Marry me, Aelin. I want you, forever. You’re my everything, I want to show the world that I’m yours.”

She didn’t question the more than questionable timing, the fact that they’d been right in the middle of… sex. How had he turned the most intimate activity into something even more intimate? Damn him, damn his smile and the quiet hope in his eyes.

She captured his lips with hers, her grip on his hips tightening, almost pushing him deeper if it were possible, and her hands were tangled in his hair. “Yes,” she breathed tears in her eyes. “Yes, a thousand times. I’ve been yours ever since the day I have met you.”

Something wet came into contact with her face, and when Rowan pulled back… It was a tear. Rowan was crying, and his face. Oh, God. She couldn’t hold back her own tears at the sight of Rowan’s bright and shiny grin. He looked the happiest she had ever seen him, it brought back his youth. That way, Rowan Whitethorn was her light in a sea of darkness. He’d always glow for her, so she would find her way back home.

Their tears kept escaping their eyes as Rowan pulled back slowly, and pushed back in at the same speed. He took his time ravishing her, tearing gasps and moans out of her every time he moved, and quieting them with his kisses. Declaration of love, promises for their future… Rowan whispered them all on her lips, and she drank them all in.

She was loved, and would always be.

••••••

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morganofthewildfire · 2 years ago

Text

Illicit Affairs - Chapter Fifty-One

Masterlist

A/N: Thank you so much for your patience! I hope you will like this :) There’s normally one more chapter and then…. epilogue. Wish me luck to write through my tears!

Warnings: none| Word Count: 3,600

The only thing Aelin thought to do as she saw beautiful green eyes staring right back at her, was thanking the Gods. Perhaps they existed. If they did, they were bastards, but… It was a miracle, to see Helia’s eyes open again. Two hours ago, Helia had woken up.

She and Rowan had all but thrown themselves at her side, urging her to not speak because her throat would hurt, that she was okay. That she was safe. After a few minutes, she had been able to relax, which allowed Rhoe to examine her. Aelin was glad that he was Helia’s doctor, even if she was sure there was some sort of conflict of interest there. She didn’t ask, neither did anyone else. She supposed everyone was glad to keep things intimate.

Now that she thought about it, she hadn’t really seen other doctors around. Yes, the five men were closer to each other than to anyone else, but she remembered them still socializing. But from what she’d seen… they hadn’t really talked to anyone else. She hoped, truly hoped, that it had nothing to do with her.

It’d been two hours now, and Helia was sleeping. It was normal, they said, she was exhausted. They were ready to give her as much time as she needed. She still needed to take a few tests, but everyone had agreed to not overwhelm her as her panic could false the results.

Aelin was alone in the room with Helia, laying her head on the girl’s bed. Rowan had gone home with Lorcan to pick up clothes and supplies, as they’d managed to negotiate a way to spend the night here. She was glad, she didn’t want to be away from her little girl anymore.

She turned her head and smiled, eyes on Helia. She still looked pretty, even with the few cuts on her face. Nothing would make her look less good. Every day that passed, she only looked more and more wonderful. She would be ravishing as an adult, and Aelin couldn’t wait for all the heart attacks she would give her father.

“You look awfully cozy here.”

Aelin startled, turning toward the voice. When she saw who stood in the doorway, Aelin stood, as if shielding Helia. Helia, who was the only reason why Aelin was focusing on her breathing, why she wasn’t letting her anger in. “Get out.” She was surprised at how leveled her voice stayed, how it didn’t tremble.

Lysandra Ennar shook her head, sending Aelin a small, fake smile and took a step into the room. “I brought flowers.”

Aelin crossed her arms, staying where she was. “You need to stay twenty feet from her. Get out.”

“I know,” Lysandra said. “But you want me here, believe me.”

Everything on her tongue tasted sour. “I want to kill you, yes, and I might if you stay here.”

Lysandra chuckled, the sound light and sweet just like everything about her. “You grew some claws, I’m glad. Truly.” She seemed… genuine. That was perhaps the worst. “But again, you want me here.”

Aelin cocked her head to the side. She only had so much patience. “And why’s that? Because I need a friend to hold my hand and a shoulder to cry on?”

A huff. “Because I know who did this.”

Aelin’s entire body stiffened, and she reached a hand behind her for Helia, making sure she was still there. Lysandra observed the gesture, and it was her turn to cock her head to the side. “You actually act like a mother. It’s crazy.”

“Crazy that some people have feelings and aren’t sociopath just like you are? I know, shocking.”

Something flashed in Lysandra’s eyes. She didn’t used to have these expressions before. She was always… sweet and kind. It was as if the woman Aelin had known had never existed. Perhaps she hadn’t, or perhaps she had until her parents’ death. Whichever it was, she didn’t wish to dwell on that. She was a grown adult, making her own choices. And Lysandra had chosen to be a royal bitch. “She’s cute.”

“Get out,” Aelin repeated. “Stay away from my daughter.”

“I’m not the one you should be worried about, you know. I don’t take my wrath on people who didn’t wrong me, and this sweet little pea did nothing wrong.”

“Yeah, because me and my cousin have done anything to hurt you,” she snapped.

“You already know what you did, and Aedion was just collateral. Thing is, that girl did nothing to me, and I would even less try to take a daughter away from a parent. All I wanted was for you to be miserable alone or trying to kill you.”

“So, you have limits?” Aelin asked, humor on her tongue. If the bitch didn’t leave in the next two minutes… “But please, do humor me.”

“Who do you think could have done it? It’s that degenerate who loves to hurt girls younger than him.”

Aelin’s entire body went cold, not only at who she meant but what she implied… No, Aelin didn’t have to care. Even with the hurt in Lysandra eyes, it wasn’t Aelin’s preoccupation anymore.

“Arobynn, really? After all this time?”

“He just came out of rehab,” Lysandra said, and Aelin was surprised at the slight hesitation in her voice. “And yes, he used to be mad at you, but he hates Whitethorn just as much now. Enough to be a fucking psycho and do this.”

Aelin took another step in her direction, hoping to put as much distance between her and Helia. “Why should I believe you?”

But the way Lysandra spoke, Aelin could only be convinced. She was sure she was telling the truth. “I already told you, I’m not in the business of breaking an innocent girl’s life and taking her away from a parent.”

Aelin kept her chin high, “And what am I supposed to do in exchange for this information?” Even with such motivations, Aelin didn’t think Lysandra would do this for entirely selfless reasons.

A glance behind Aelin, toward the sleeping little girl. “I still wish you the worst, but… Take care of that girl. Don’t let her get messed up like us, will you?”

“Don’t compare yourself to Aelin,” a deep voice said from the second doorway, this one just beside Helia’s bed. This wasn’t an entryway accessible to the public, but doctors had access to it. “And get out of here before I call the police.”

Lysandra’s face turned predatory. “Professor Whitethorn, my favorite rule breaker! How are you faring? How wonderful it must be to not hide anymore.” There was something fake, there in her tone and face. And yet, she looked so much like how she used to a year ago. It had all been a lie, everything. And Aelin had just seen the real Lysandra a few minutes ago, but she disappeared the moment Rowan came in. As if the true Lysandra couldn’t stand to be seen by multiple people at times.

Rowan walked until he stood next to Aelin, and his warmth… It was enough to help her breathe a little better.

How could she fool herself into thinking she’d be able to live without this? Without him?

“Thank you for the flowers. You’ve overstayed your welcome.”

Lysandra’s laugh sounded almost real. “Always the charmer, Professor.”

Rowan didn’t answer the jab. She was one of the reasons why it wasn’t correct anymore to call him professor. The reason why he had lost this job he loved so much. Yes, he’d broken the rule. It wasn’t all on her, Aelin was aware of that. But… She had been a part of it.

Yes, Lysandra might not be the evil mastermind she tried to remember, but it didn’t mean Aelin had to take that step in her direction, no matter how tempting. A sad past didn’t excuse repeating bad actions. It didn’t excuse hurting Aedion and Rowan.

And more importantly, it didn’t excuse hurting Aelin.

“Goodbye, Lysandra.” Something flashed in her eyes, as if she had been expecting another ending. She nodded once, then twice. And then, she was gone. For good. Aelin hoped she’d get better, she didn’t wish to anyone to live and stay with a rotten heart. But she didn’t want her anywhere near her.

“Are you okay? What did she want?” Rowan asked softly, a hand on her arm and patiently waiting for the answer.

“Arobynn did this,” she breathed. “She told me that.”

Rowan nodded, face darkening. “I know. I-I just got a call from the local P.D. They found the car we collided with. Arobynn used a car registered in his name. They have him in custody.”

That sounded… so simple. But maybe he hadn’t been an evil mastermind either. She’d given him too much credit because she was too hurt to see clearly. If he’d used one of his own cars… The man was stupid.

“What is he facing?”

“They found lots of alcohol in the car, so drunk driving, as well as failing to aid. He could do a few years.”

And again, it was as if a weight was lifted off her chest. She nodded and wrapped her arms around his neck. She breathed him in, clutching his shirt in her hands. “It’s over now.”

He wrapped an arm around her waist, and it was only then that she felt the tremor in his body. It must be… a lot, to know who had hurt his girl. A small part of her brain wondered if he blamed her for it. Without her, he wouldn’t have been the object of Arobynn’s wrath. His daughter would have been protected.

But she couldn’t control the actions of other people. She could only do her best with her own action, trying to make her family happy.

Yet, she knew he didn’t blame her. Knew that this small part of her brain was lying, trying its hardest to trick her. If Rowan truly believed she was a danger to his daughter, she wouldn’t be allowed to be anywhere near Helia.

“I hate him,” he whispered. “He deserves worse.”

She understood and felt the same. She pulled back enough to look him in the eyes. “He’s going to rot in jail all alone, and now we’re together. He doesn’t matter anymore, does he?”

He shook his head, but his eyebrows were still furrowed. She rose on her tiptoes, kissing him softly. Gods, she loved that feeling. She loved him more than life itself. She pulled back and told him so, and that had the merit of lightening his face a little. “I love you more,” he said, his thumb stroking her waist over her tshirt.

She clicked her tongue. “No one on likes a liar, Whitethorn.”

He grinned, shaking his head. She’d missed that face and that expression. He always seemed to be so done with her, and yet he always came back for more. Case point, he cupped her cheek and leaned in to kiss her slowly. As their lips moved, Aelin felt herself getting more and more breathless. She felt lightheaded as he kissed her thoroughly, enough to have her feel dizzy. Yet, she never wanted to pull away. Her lips parted, letting him in. The small noise that came out of him was enough to have her toes curl in her shoes, but Rowan pulled away before the kiss could change tone. Perhaps it was for the best, considering their setting.

“Wait until we get back home, then I’ll show you just how much I love you.”

She bit her lip, looking up at him. “I can’t wait.” She really couldn’t. His eyes darkened a little more, and she knew he wondered if they could get away with… reuniting now. He had his office, and she knew they both needed it. But… Aelin had something to do, and one of them had to stay by Helia’s side. “Sorry, baby.”

He shook his head, and she smiled. Why was she even apologizing? “Go,” he breathed, stealing a quick kiss from her lips. She nodded and kissed him one last time before she left the room.

The walk to the office wasn’t long enough for Aelin. Her palms got sweaty about two seconds after she left Rowan’s side. It wasn’t a conversation she was eager to have but she still knew it had to happen. She had to face her shame, and it was even more important that she did it for Elide. Because she was a true friend, the one deserving of Aelin’s energy.

She knocked on Lorcan’s office door, hoping they were still there. They had refused to go home a few hours ago, in case Aelin and Rowan needed anything or if something happened with Helia. She was grateful for their support, for the love they showed Helia. Her little girl would never be alone in this world, she had too many people who loved her.

“Hey,” she breathed when Lorcan opened the door. She was relieved when she saw his face and didn’t see any traces of sleep. At least she hadn’t woken them up. “Is Elide there?”

“Come in!” A voice said from inside, and maybe Lorcan took one second too long before opening the door enough for her to get in, but she didn’t really care. She quite deserved that one. Aelin took a step into the unfamiliar office and looked around. It had the same layout as Rowan’s but the pieces of furniture were darker than her boyfriend’s. Elide was sitting on the couch, leaning toward the table where food was spread. “You want an avocado? There’s some chocolate syrup on it.” The brunette asked Aelin.

She shook her head. She really didn’t feel like eating now. Elide snorted and shrugged. “That’s more for me, then. I’ve been craving these things for days.”

The cravings, right. Aelin hadn’t known they could happen so early in pregnancy. Or maybe it wasn’t because of the pregnancy at all and Aelin just looked stupid standing there.

As if sensing the tension, Lorcan said, “I’m gonna check up on Ro. Be careful.” Aelin wondered what Elide would have to be careful of sitting on a perfectly comfortable couch but… she held back any remark. She didn’t feel like fighting Lorcan Salvaterre today. Yet, she couldn’t hold in a grimace as he leaned in and kissed his girlfriend. She looked perfectly content, and a part of Aelin was glad for it. But… Lorcan, seriously? How did he bag someone as great as Elide?

Before leaving, the bastard sent her a warning look and she only rolled her eyes, coming to sit beside her friend. “You look like shit,” Elide commented, shoving another piece of dead fish and rice in her mouth.

Aelin snorted, not offended. That was the truth, but she didn’t really care. She had more important things to talk about. “I wanted to talk to you about something.”

Elide nodded, swallowing what she was chewing and her back straightened. “Aelin, I should have—”

“I want to be there,” Aelin blurted. “I know I ran away when I found out about your pregnancy but… Fuck, Elide I’m so thrilled for you, and I’m so ashamed of my reaction. But I want to be with you, I want to help you plan everything, I want to spoil that kid rotten. I want… I missed so many parts of your life, but I don’t want to miss anything in your child’s life, if you’ll allow me. I’m so sorry I wasn’t supporting, I’m sorry that I ran. I-I shouldn’t have.”

Elide grabbed her hand. “You have nothing to say sorry for. That turd Lorcan messed up, Aelin. I had told him to not say a thing to you until things were better, and if it wasn’t for that accident, I would have told you this weekend. Fuck, Lin, your daughter is in a hospital bed, you were sleep deprived and I know and understand how your infertility hurts you.”

She could have sobbed for the normality in her voice when she talked about Aelin’s condition. She wasn’t sugarcoating it the way Aedion or Fenrys did, and it felt so relieving.

Elide kept going, “I would be thrilled to have you in my child’s life, Aelin.”

“Yeah?” She breathed; voice full of hope.

Her friend nodded, grabbing her hand. “There’s something I meant to ask you when I told you.” Aelin was confused but she nodded, urging her friend to go on. “We thought a little about this with Lorcan, and it just seemed so evident that—”

“He proposed?” Aelin asked, so overly eager that she cut off her friend.

Elide’s eyes widened, her cheeks turning a bright and intense shade of red. “What? No! Are you mad?”

“You’re going to have a kid with the guy, why act so strange about marriage?” Aelin asked, both amused and worried for her friend.

“It’s not the same! Marriage… It’s commitment.”

Aelin’s eyebrows rose. “A child doesn’t seem like commitment enough for you?”

Elide fidgeted, looking away. For once, Aelin wasn’t on the receiving end of the intrusive questions. It was nice, though she couldn’t really enjoy her friend’s discomfort. “It’s just—I’d feel trapped, I think? I don’t want a way out, I love Lorcan so, so much Aelin,” and she believed it, she could hear it in her voice. “But, I don’t know… We shouldn’t get married only because we have a kid on the way. We’re not in our mother’s generation anymore, you know? It’s just… too fast. I mean, you’re even more afraid of commitment than I am. If Rowan went on one knee now you’d probably freak out.”

She made a humming noise. “I don’t know, I rather like what happens when he’s on his knees.” Elide made a noise of disgust, but Aelin simply threw her head back and laughed. When she regained her seriousness she said, “Nah, I don’t think I’d run. I’d make him buy me the most expensive and beautiful dress in town and then we could proceed.”

Elide snorted. “And you want him on his knees before or after you put the dress on?”

Aelin bit her lip, pretending to think. Though, the rush of warmth in her body was already telling enough. “On my wedding day? I better be worshiped multiple times, though I wouldn’t say no to some fun with… clothes on.”

Elide barked a laugh. “Not afraid of commitment anymore, then?”

Aelin thought about it for a second, then she shook her head. “No. I’ve been away too long, but we aren’t the same Elide. Don’t rush to be in synch with me, be in synch with your heart. It is what matters.”

Her friend’s eyes shone with tears, and she squeezed her hand. “I want you to be my kid’s godmother.”

It was as if she was knocked in the chest. “W-what?”

“If anything happened to me, to Lorcan, we know that you and Rowan would take care of our child in the best way possible. You’d love them like your own, and I trust you.”

She shook her head, still feeling dizzy and struggling to breathe. “No.”

One second of silence. Then another. “Excuse me?”

“Don’t waste your safety on me. Keep Rowan, and I promise I’d be there, and I would love your child but… You don’t have to do this.”

“Aelin,” she said her name with fierceness. “You were my first choice. Not Rowan. And we didn’t pick you simply because you’re with him. I picked you because you love with your whole heart, because you know when to put people first. Sometimes you even do it too much. But… Aelin, I wouldn’t trust a lot of people to take care of my kid, but you are at the top of that tiny list.”

“Really?” She breathed, barely able to keep in the tears and sobs. It’d be humiliating if she cried now.

Elide’s smile turned intimate, one that could only be shared between two people who deeply cared for one another. “Of course.”

Aelin bit the inside of her cheek and looked away, “Then yes, I suppose. At least I will be able to provide a refuge whenever that child see past the barriers of biology and wants to escape their dad.”

Elide barked a laugh, shaking her head. She took a bite of her avocado. “He acts all brave but he’s been worried for you, you know.”

“What?”

She nodded and hummed. “I think he has a soft spot for you, but just a tiny one.”

Aelin’s smile turned sly. “Oh, I’m gonna have so much fun with this.”

They stayed in a comfortable silence for a while, Aelin observing her friend eat. Then, Elide broke the silence, “How are you coping?”

Aelin thought for a second, and she let curiosity win her over. She grabbed one of the avocados and poured some of that chocolate syrup on top of it. “I’m dealing. Honestly, I think it’s finally becoming easier, you know? And I know that you and the others probably think that it’s because it’s going better with Rowan but… No. I just, I don’t know, I just don’t care anymore. I want my family and I happy, and that’s it.”

“I’m proud of you, and of the work you’ve done. Rowan helped, but you did it all.”

Aelin smiled and took a bite of the food before gagging, reaching for the nearest bin. “What the hell, Elide!”

The brunette was laughing. “What? It’s the hormones!”

Aelin rolled her eyes, supposing it wouldn’t be the last time she heard this phrase. Somehow there was no jealousy in her heart, simply excitement for what was to come.

••••••

@sheharahu // @morganofthewildfire // @thestoriesyoutell // @fromthelibraryofemilyj // @swankii-art-teacher // @itsforeverinnocent-blog // @becarefuloflove // @imnotsogoodatthis // @rowaelinismyotp // @a-court-of-milkandhoney // @feysand-loml // @elentiyawhitethorn // @live-the-fangirl-life // @story-scribbler // @loves-books // @fangirlprincess09 // @theysayitscrazy // @danibutterr // @endlessdaydream // @thegreyj // @gracie-rosee // @acreativelydifferentlove // @cretaceous-therapod // @louphantomdragon // @mis-lil-red // @backtobl4ck // @whoever-you-choose-to-love // @lemonade-coolattas // @mad-madeline-ace // @the-introverted-bibliophile // @leiawritesstories // @emilyoftheshadows // @anniesbookshelf // @rainbowcheetah512 // @astra-ad-mare // @story-scribbler // @superspiritfestival // @wordsafterhours // @rowaelinrambling // @black-daisy-water // @fireheart-violet // @livsdriverslicense // @charlizeed // @ladykreads // @mariamuses // @autumnbabylon // @justreadertings // @highqueenofelfhame // @earthtolinds // @bowdawn // @psychopath-at-heart // @ginnyweasley06 // @cookiemonsterwholovesbooks

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morganofthewildfire · 2 years ago

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I hope you’re ok ❤️

thank you for checking in ❤️❤️❤️❤️

this semester has been hell and i really miss all of you guys! hopefully i can come back soon ❤️

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morganofthewildfire · 2 years ago

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hi morgan!

just dropping by to say i'm sending you all the mental and emotional strength and warm hugs right now--you've got this!! love you 🫶🫶

thank you so much leia!!

I really appreciate it ❤️❤️❤️❤️

this semester is kicking my ass, but i should have a lot more free time over the summer and i'm hoping i can be more active on here again then!

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morganofthewildfire · 2 years ago

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A/N: here’s the prologue to this new fic I’m working on called “Sweet As Sugar!” Masterlist is coming soon! Hope you enjoy!!

Summary: After accidentally killing the biggest crime leader’s second in command and getting kidnapped by a literal mafia called “The Cadre” (how stupid, she knows) Aelin Galathynius doesn’t think her life can get any shittier. Until it does…

With the choice to either leave the giant mansion in the middle of nowhere and be hunted for the rest of her life by the deadliest mafia in Erilea, The Valg or stay and live with the deadliest man in the world, Rowan Whitethorn Aelin has to pick the right choice, but all she can worry about is trying to learn to bake to keep her parents family bakery operating.

Word count: 797

Aelin Galathynius had done a lot of stupid things in her life. A lot. Like one time dying her hair pink and another time literally sneaking into an amusement park at 3 AM because she was bored. But, this… this just topped the fucking cake.

Blood splashed on her apron, mixing with the flour and frosting she knew already covered the pink fabric. Her mouth hung wide open and shock and terror washed over her as the man in front of her crumbled to the floor, his own gun that had been in his hand, falling to the concrete with a clank that echoed in the alleyway.

Oh my god, she had just killed a man!

“I—” she stuttered, but she couldn’t form words, not as blood spread across the floor of the alleyway, coating it in dark red that was illuminated by the moonlight.

Aelin swallowed thickly.

“You just killed him…” the man who was just being threatened by the person she had just killed said. Surprise was clear in his accented voice.

Aelin nodded slowly, backing away.

“Thanks, I guess,” the man said nervously with a chuckle and Aelin immediately snapped her gaze to him, eyes still very wide.

“Thanks?! I just killed a man!”

“Yeah, thanks for saving me,” the man said, stepping out from the shadows he had been hidden in.

Aelin immediately lifted the gun, ready to shoot if it was needed, but the man only put his hands in the air to show he wasn’t armed. “Don’t worry sweetheart, that’s actually my gun in your hand, I’m not going to hurt you,” he said as if this was just a casual thing and there wasn’t a dead body in front of them.

He was beautiful, with tan skin, onyx eyes and shoulder-length golden waves, a little playful grin on his face.

Aelin should’ve let the man kill him, or better yet, kill him herself. “You better stay away from me!” she said, backing away further.

She didn’t know what she was going to do, she was too overwhelmed and this cocky, annoying prick that she had decided to save instead of minding her own goddamn business wasn’t helping.

The man just sighed. “Okay and what’re you going to do if I stay away from you and you call the cops?” he asked, raising a perfectly groomed brow. “You have my gun and just murdered someone. Do you have the memory of a goldfish or something?”

Aelin growled, totally ready to make the death toll of the night go from one to two.

The man took a few tentative steps forward, in case she decided to pull the trigger he’d have enough time to dodge the bullet, but luckily Aelin already had a plan. The second he was close enough she kicked him in the balls, hard, not waiting to watch him fall to the ground, only listening to his grunt of pain as she dashed away down the alley.

“What the heck, Fenrys? We heard shots. What happened?” a new, deeper voice said, but Aelin didn’t turn around, just kept running. “Oh my god did you just kill Erawen?!”

“No,” the man on the ground— Fenrys grunted. “I didn’t. She did,” he said. Aelin didn’t bother listening, only running faster. “Well don’t just stand there like an idiot! Get her!

She thought about screaming into the empty streets, maybe someone would look out their window and call 911, concerned for the girl who was running away from something, screaming like a deranged banshee, but that probably wasn’t the best idea. She was literally holding a gun and blood was splattered over her clothes.

Someone grabbed onto her arm, holding it in a vice grip, causing her to shriek.

“Let go of me!” she yelled, the gun dropping out of her hand. She tried to wiggle out of the man’s grip, but he was strong, holding onto her tightly.

“Stop fighting,” the man hissed lowly.

“Leave me alone! I’m calling the police!”

The man huffed, almost as if he was laughing.

How dare he, Aelin thought, flushing crimson. When she got out of this, she was gonna kick him to the Southern Continent.

“Did you get her?” the voice from earlier that had been talking to Fenrys said.

“Yes,” the man holding her replied, his voice strained as she kicked. “Stop it,” he hissed.

Aelin only continued. Who cares anymore, she’d rather go to prison than be kidnapped by these psychos. “Help me! Help me! I’m being kidnapped!”

“Stop,” the man holding her hissed, but Aelin only yelled louder.

“Look, we’re really sorry for this,” the other man said, stepping forward. Before Aelin could see his face he pushed a cloth in her face.

A sweet scent filled her nose before the world around her went dark.

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