misttiique

[misttiique]

Froggy so fat they became a kaiju

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my dumb? founded. my flabbers? gasted. my gob??? smacked

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It’s weird how everyone hating you when you’re nine years old still affects your self esteem when you’re 26 like yeah nobody came to my birthday party but that was like 17 years ago why is it stopping me from going to a gay bar

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saying “can u not” to inanimate objects that are just following the laws of physics but in, like, inconvenient ways

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I’m no one’s favourite. I’m the back up. The one they go to when they have no other options. I sit and walk behind them and pretend that I am cared about but I’m not. And that really hurts.

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My work inbox is a form of perpetual hell for a lot of reasons atm, but somehow there’s something worse than the essential oil cultists attempting to make it entirely unusable on a daily basis, and that’s the sheer number of editing requests from young and first time authors who don’t even really want editing, they just want someone to reassure them they’re not Problematic™ and they’re genuinely scared to death of their potential readers.

They’re so hyperfixated on the terror of inadvertently fucking up and being dragged across the internet, that they can’t even bring themselves to finish their work. So instead of answering questions about how to fix narrative flow, character arc and making grammar changes and fixing typos, I spend a lot of my time answering things like this:

“But what if someone hates it?”

Welp. Can’t please everyone I guess.

“But what if I fucked up this part…”

Did you do your research? Okay good, here is a list of sensitivity readers you can hire to help you make sure you actually understood the things you read. You’ve done all that and taken their advice onboard? Well done. That’s more than a lot of New York Times Bestsellers ever do.

“Okay but what if someone thinks I meant this when I meant that?”

See previous response.

“But what if—”

Your work is always going to be open to interpretation. Sometimes people will read into things you didn’t even realize you were inferring. Sometimes you didn’t actually infer anything but someone will find meaning anyway. That’s just how this works I’m afraid. People find meaning in words. It’s what us humans are particularly good at. Sometimes they find meanings we like, sometimes we don’t. We have no control over how someone else uses their critical thinking skills (if at all).

“But what if someone says…”

Someone is always going to say something you’re not going to like. They may even try to paint you as a villain to justify their dislike of you because they conflate personally liking something with universal worthiness. You can be the most Unproblematic ���, best researched, most woke individual on the planet, and someone is still going to find fault in what you did. Jesus Christ himself could descend from heaven with a short novella about petting puppies and being kind to each other, and he’d still end up nailed to the proverbial wall by someone.

You cannot control every aspect of how people will interact with your work, and I know that is terrifying when you watch the way fandom eats its own sometimes. But if you can’t get over that terror…you’re never going to get anywhere. You need to accept that not everyone will always like you or your work, and it’s not easy. I struggle with it a lot sometimes, especially when people tag my posts with mean comments or personal remarks about how much they hate me, but unlike them I take my issues to therapy and work them out in an actual safe space, and I’m telling you, they don’t speak for everyone.

The echo chamber of discourse is loud, and sometimes you just need to take a step out and remember how to breathe and remind yourself not everyone needs to like you. And not everyone will, and that’s okay. And hey, your work might bomb or it might not. But you won’t actually know until you try.

Perfection is unattainable. Don’t kill yourself trying to get there. You can only do your very best, and even then your very best will shift and adapt with you as you grow and change as a person. It’s inevitable. I dunno where I’m going with this anymore. Permanence is an illusion and we’re all just sentient atoms hurtling toward the great unknown. Write your god damn story.

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Having someone match your wit or your weirdness without hesitation is actually so fucking comforting and fun.

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pissing is actually a trauma response to drinking water

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BREAKFAST

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reblog to give somebody a fucking hug because we are all struggling to get through it. solidarity in this tough ass world.

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wait, isnt NSFW the letters on the compass

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i made a grindr and in under 24 hours i got the most insane unsolicited nude to ever exist. hes fully nude on the beach and in his right hand is a black tipped reef shark i could not make this shit up if i tried