miss-little-kitten

[miss-little-kitten]

My husband brought me a blanket when my mom and I were drunk laughing in bed and went “it’s from me and your dad. Take a nap.” And you know what it fucking worked

[miss-little-kitten]

My husband: I love you

Me: oh, swing and a miss.

My father: can you just tell your husband you love him without making fun of him?

Like no, I’ll die if I show affection in front of others. Love is so embarrassing

[miss-little-kitten]

If your the girls I helped who just sent me a mood ring, stating you hope I’m always happy.

I’m sorry I don’t have your return address so I’m going to pretend you can read this:

I love it. I’m sorry you were abducted too, but I’m so thankful you were not hurt. I’m sorry I was too much of a coward to let you see me following my attack, despite you wanting to. I’m sorry you were grabbed following what I did. I love my mood ring, it’s so cute. I’m getting it placed in a pendant to wear around my neck because you’re important to me. You were the light in that dark moment. I cried when I found out you both lived, unharmed just scared. I’m sorry I made our abductor so angry he grabbed you immediately after leaving my body behind. I’m so thankful you’re okay.

You’re my hero. Both of you. I hope you had a happy holiday and I hope i get your return address soon.

[miss-little-kitten]

My best friend and I used to be driving and I’d be like “is that a cop? Suspicious.” And he’d go “there’s two cops in this town, I promise you it’s not.”

[miss-little-kitten]

[miss-little-kitten]

You know, I hate telling people I read. Like, yes I read, but I will lie about what I’m reading. I’m not going to say “oh yes, Carol, I’m reading filthy smut about Steve Harrington from hit tv series Stranger Things. Want the link?”

[miss-little-kitten]

Help...the way this could 100% happen 😂

[miss-little-kitten]

[miss-little-kitten]

I was warning my dad how painful his leg was going to be after surgery. He’s fine, he’s effing fine. I’m all pissy and he just goes: “you know it was probably the leukemia.” I dropped my book I was speechless. 1) I had forgotten I had leukemia. 2) the audacity of that man to be so much healthier than me. 3) I’m mad I forgot because of head trauma.

My entire family found it hysterical though.

[miss-little-kitten]

[miss-little-kitten]

My sister told me a story about how our gay roommate asked to see my vagina and i was at the OBGYN and I went “sure whatever”.

Forgetting I’m permanently disfigured.

He begged to know if they all looked that scary or if I was extra scary and if my twin had the same scary vagina. anyway his crisis ended when my sister went “these are what they look like. Hers is unfortunate.” He fucked my then fiancé later but like man he was real worried about heterosexual and lesbians for a hot minute.

in most fics i've read robin is grossed out when steve talks about his sex life, which is probably far more in character for her, but hear me out

imagine them discussing literally everything. like having no boundaries whatsoever.

one day robin mentions she's never seen a dick and she's curious what all the fuss is about.

robin: you have one

steve: yeah...?

robin: so show me

steve: ??

steve: sure, why not

when steve pulls down his pants, robin just stares at him with a blank face

robin: that's... it?

steve: what do you mean that's it??

robin: it looks sad

steve: ??? well, it's not hard rn, obviously???

robin: ugh, boring

steve: you want me to show you my hard dick?? is that what's happening rn?

robin: i mean yeah?

steve: your judgemental face is forever burned into my mind. i don't think i'll ever be able to get hard again.

then robin bursts into his room like a week later

robin: steve, you're a slut-

steve: hey!

robin: so you know your way around a vagina, right?? i need you to tell me if i have a rash or not

steve: do you not own a handheld mirror?

robin: i'm freaking out so much, i can't make a sound observation rn

steve: *sigh* alright

turns out robin does indeed have a rash and steve takes her to the doctor

at one point they lose all shame. steve regularly air dries while robin hangs out in his room. robin makes steve do her monthly breast self-exam. they check each other for ticks.

when steve and eddie start dating steve tells robin literally everything. robin knows way too much about eddie and she loves it.

robin comes over for movie night, eddie is already there

robin: how was your day?

steve: we slept in, then eddie fucked me, it was great-

eddie: *chokes*

steve: then we cooked lunch, there are some leftovers in the fridge, go ahead and eat. yours?

eddie: ???

robin: ugh, don't get me started-

eddie: wait wait wait, how did you just say that so casually?

stobin: ???

eddie: that i fucked you??

steve: i tell robin everything. i told you that. you said that's fine.

eddie: i didn't know that included our sex life?

steve: why wouldn't it? ... wait, oh no, are you not okay with that?? i'm sorry, i thought you knew??

eddie: oh no, it's fine! it just surprised me is all. y'all are real freaks, carry on

stobin: okay then

robin freaks out before her first date with a girl

robin: what if my vagina looks weird???

steve: are you planning to fuck her on the first date, buckley? and how many times do i have to tell you your vagina looks absolutely normal??

robin: no, i'm not, but it's still a valid concern!!! what if my vagina looks hideous to girls??

eddie, the silent observer: lol

steve: what are you even talking about... a vagina is a vagina, vagina lovers love all vaginas

robin: stop saying vagina

steve: vagina vagina vagina-

robin tackles him and they end up wrestling until steve yields

steve: okay okay,, as someone who's seen his fair share of coochies

robin: that's even worse

steve: yours looks perfectly fine.

eddie: wait, you've seen it?

stobin, staring at him: ...

eddie: right, dumb question

[miss-little-kitten]

She’s still here. Bits and pieces.

I see her when I see my sister and I’s hand prints on our wall.

I see her with her ballet shoes hung over her door.

I see her with the dance studio my dad placed for me during Covid, now filled with storage but once fills with laughter of girls.

I see her with flower stickers all over.

I see her as I look at a small pink llama flower pot that held my rings.

I see her in the Polaroids with my parents, ng tube and chemo clear.

I see her in bits of my memory. But I’m walking in her grave yard all the same. I am her or was her. I devoured true crime novels that I’ve covered. My bedroom moved to across the hall from my parents despite the fact I am grown. Now the room in which my twin and I would lay in each others bed well into our twenties, not able to imagine one without the other. She can’t look me in the eye now. But that girl lives here yet. Her ghost haunting me. Crowns and sashes and medals and trophies line the wall, pageant robes in every corner. A girl who was so hopeful, she seemed to be happy.

Ghosts aren’t real, but then why do I feel like one? Why do I feel like a lost little girl seeing who she grew up to be? Ballerina trapped in her box. I am safe here. I am home. I wish I could have asked my younger self to write how I am supposed to be. How I am supposed to live. How I am supposed to love. Because right now I’m lost. Begging to play one more board game because they have rules and I understand them because I can read them.

Begging for the rules of my life to come back to me. Begging for the rules who I am to be real. Begging to know more and more because I am lost, I am haunted by her, but in reality I want to be her. She didn’t marry for money, she married for love. She felt love to raw and real. She must have. If she did not I don’t understand why everyone wants her back so badly.

I hope I get to meet the ghost. Become her once more. Love real, laugh wildly, and smile widely. For now I accept that maybe I am haunting her by being in this space while I recover. I think she’s fine with it though. She seems like she was nice.

[miss-little-kitten]

It’s weird to think I’m an actress/model when not writing silly little fan fiction. Like I tell people I’m a writer. My mom thinks I mean from when I published articles. My dad thinks it’s because I like messing with people. My husband knows it’s because of fan fiction. Like at fashion week my priority was my favorite fanfic at the time updating

[miss-little-kitten]

From all the consequences the 9/11 had in this world, the ending of The Umbrella Academy is by far the worst possible.

[miss-little-kitten]

[miss-little-kitten]

me every night after i tell myself i'll go to bed early this time

[miss-little-kitten]

Hey H, if you’re able to read this from your death, you would have loved season 2 Steve Harrington. Maybe we would have watched the show sooner. Maybe you’d love it so much you would have played one more game of dnd. You would have shown me season one in our pajamas and scream laugh at scenes. We would have played one more game. We’d have watched one more episode. Death is weird, but he talked about the show before it came out so much. He was so excited to see it. He died two days before the premiere. So now I get to sit here: dice, trading cards, cosplay, and more and hope he would have liked it as much as I do now.

7 years ago, Stranger Things 2 premiered on Netflix… and we got THIS Steve Harrington