misdcmeanours

[misdcmeanours]

Jacob Elordi photographed by Eli Russell Linnetz for GQ Magazine

[misdcmeanours]

he shifted with her hit, even if it isn't a hard hit. she wasn't that bad. after all this shit with johnny, he wondered if she would be like him. you know? arrogant. entitled. bursting at the seems with the need to prove herself. or maybe that would just be apollo he's thinking of. and as she was his sister. maybe theon had reason to worry.

but she was smart. EMOTIONALLY SMART. something he loved in a lady, as his choice of fiancé showed. but theon wasn't easy to jostle on his broken world view. "we both know that i'm not exactly easy to around. i used to be. i just–things have been hard. and life seems very dismal at the moment. so why not just settle down with myself and be a lonely old man?"

"i didn't ask, thanks." she smacks his arm, probably harder than she should. but then again he could take it? she wondered for a moment just how long it took him to get dressed in the morning, in between all the posing for the mirrors, and she giggled to herself.

at what he said about love, though? she just cants her head and pouts without even meaning to. "i. i'm really sorry, theon." gretchen takes another sip of her beer."but how do you get used to being lonely? it's--- after you've had someone you thought you'd share your life with. are you really okay with being alone or are you just scared that no one is going to love you again?" she might see a little too much of herself in that second option.

[misdcmeanours]

"jesus, jude." elijah gives him a small little chuckle as she catches the sharp edges of his statement. "let a girl breathe before you call her out like that?" she wasn't upset, how could she be? look at him? he was the most angelic person she's ever met.

"THANK YOU. i mean it." she offers him the softest smile. he was too kind to her. always complimenting her in the best ways. but she always knew she was going to have to deal with the abuse. she had come to accept that. "next? oh well ... i don't really know? i guess i don't want to give up touring. but being home would be nice? i haven't had a long stint home in years. but yes, then world hunger!"

"so you have imposter syndrome?" yes, that was a read. but he means it. the sun catches on elijah's hair and he's reminded how she's far more divine than he could ever beg to be. if there was one thing he could do, he wanted to watch her heal. "because the fact that you wanted this doesn't mean that you deserved all the worst parts of being someone. you're one of the most talented bassists of the last century, dove. you should at least get a house of gold for that, not glass."

jude leans his shoulder against elijah's with another smile. "so what do you want next? keep touring? settle down? solve world hunger? i really think you could do it, you know?"

[misdcmeanours]

[ aftercare ] [ body part ] (theon + eli + jamie ) @devlsbackbone

theon is a classic kind of lover. you know? chains, ropes, and nearly everything the fangirls could imagine. very charming of him. but it's the aftercare that really gives theon the soft edge that many had fallen for in the past. he likes the quiet post rough sex cuddle. just skin on skin contact and lingering touches. though his recent sex life was more ... how do you say, hit it and quit it. when he is in love. he tends to favor the soft side with pillow talk.

body parts though, theon was easy. he loves to stare, he does it often. but he mostly likes to stare at his lover's legs. he wasn't weird about it. but he did love to notice the soft curves of the muscles in his partner's legs. he guesses if you wanted a less sensational answer, he'd go with hands.

elijah usually ends her love making in a stupid fight or pissing match with her current flings. but when it isn't so hostile, she's a fan of eating. from ordering postmates, to bringing snacks and candy into the bed from downstairs. elijah usually enjoyed a good round or two by giggles and chips with the person she loved. she really is a yapper as well. she loves to talk and get to know everything about you. that is before she's pouting to go again.

she's a big fan of eyes. everything about them. mostly the way they light up when they're excited or happy. she just likes to stay close and watch others to really appreciate their eyes.

jamie is a manic ball of energy, usually. he doesn't think sex really has a beginning or end. just little breaks inbetween? so when they are calling a quick T.O. he expects his lover to be enjoying a movie with him. even doodling with him or listening to music. the idea of side by side entertainment makes him happy. he just wants to know the person with him is happy and content while they get ready to go again?

he's an unapologetic mouth guy. he will stare at your lips while you chat. just enjoying the sight before him. he loves a happy smile. loves a quick little smirk. he just thinks an expression is magical. maybe that was the artist inside him.

[misdcmeanours]

"i can tell." he smirks taking a drink from his beer. everything she said was another clue into who she was. and what she might be doing on this tour. she was far too sweet for this life. this band. and apollo inviting her? who would protect her? not apollo. never apollo.

"real love exists," he would never stand there and say it doesn't. "but i've had my fair share of wanting. i'd like to think i'm content without that in my life anymore. i'll just honor what i had." he gave a small shrug. what he's saying he truly believes, and maybe that's the saddest part.

she needed to catch up with him for this conversation. she stole another ipa from his six pack and drained her current can, her cheeks tinted pink as she noticed his eyes on her. it was embarrassing how many butterflies soared in her stomach when he smiled at her. he was too handsome. it wasn’t fair. “i’m not good at standing up for myself.”

oh. he had it bad, didn’t he? “love isn’t about needing someone? it’s just as much about wanting?” but she also remembered all the press about his fiancé, fiona, and she couldn’t help but reach out for his arm. “it doesn’t have to be fake love. there’s nothing wrong with it being real love, theon?”

[misdcmeanours]

🐝  *  ―  𝑺𝑬𝑿𝑼𝑨𝑳 𝑯𝑬𝑨𝑫𝑪𝑨𝑵𝑶𝑵 𝑨𝑳𝑷𝑯𝑨𝑩𝑬𝑻.  (  send one or more to learn a little more about my muse and their sex life. note that these questions are only suggestions, you can go wild with the headcanon prompts.  )

[ aftercare ] ― what are they like after sex? any specific routine they have for themselves or their partner that they like to do? [ body part ] ― what is their favorite body part? what kind of body / parts would they like their partner to have ( e.g. big boobs, long cock, etc. )? [ cum ] ― what does it take to make them come? can they come multiple times in one sitting or do they need longer breaks? [ desires ] ― what turns them on? what do they like to have done to them most? what do they like to do to their partner most? [ experience ] ― how experienced are they? how many different partners did they have? [ first time ] ― what was their first time like? when did it happen? did they enjoy it? [ grooming ] ― do they shave? do they have a preference for their partners when it comes to body hair? [ horny ] ― how high is their sex drive? do they have a lot of sex or is it a more occasional thing? is sex, in general, important to them? [ intimacy ] ― how are they during sex? do they prefer a more intimate / romantic approach or a more casual one? [ joker ] ― tell one random headcanon that wouldn't fit anywhere else on the list. [ kinks ] ― what is their biggest kink? are there any kinks they haven't tried but want to? are there any kinks they have tried but learned are not for them? [ locations ] ― what are their favorite locations to have sex? are they a risk taker where people could walk in on them, or do they prefer to keep it private? [ masturbation ] ― do they masturbate? if so, how often? [ no go ] ― what wouldn't they do? what turns them off? [ oral ] ― do they prefer to give or receive oral? anything specific they enjoy / don't enjoy when it comes to oral? [ positions ] ― what are their favorite sex positions? is there something they typically default to? a special position they've always wanted to try? [ quickies ] ― do they have one-night stands? if so, how often? [ rounds ] ― how many rounds can they go before having to take a break? how good is their stamina? [ secrets ] ― do they have any dirty secrets? if so, what are they? [ toys ] ― do they on toys? do they use toys on themselves or like to use them on their partners? [ underwear ] ― what type of underwear do they typically wear? do they own lingerie? is there something specific they like their partner to wear? [ volume ] ― how loud do they get during sex? do they prefer a partner that's louder or one that's quieter? [ watch ] ― do they like to watch their partner masturbating or having sex with someone else? do they like to be watched? [ xxx ] ― do they watch porn? if so, how often? anything specific they like to watch? [ yearning ] ― what do they typically do to get people to have sex with them? do they let it happen naturally or are there things they like to do to turn their partners on? [ zzz ] ― how quickly after sex do they fall asleep? are they usually tired after or full of energy?

[misdcmeanours]

"oh?" her lips form a perfect circle as she mulls over the question he is asking her. did she want to be a rockstar? well, no. not particularly. but she wanted to be something. she wanted to be more than what she always was. so she met his stare. matching his intensity as it seems the only thing she could do with someone so beautiful giving her this much attention.

"well," she shrugs her shoulders and pouts slightly. "i wanted to be someone. and music has always meant so much to me? i wanted to play it forever? i wanted my life to MEAN something? so yeah? yeah i guess i did want it? but there are cons to everything, and the cons can outweigh the pros. you know what they say. glass houses."

"is that what you want to do?" jude cocks his head, he had a bad habit of peering directly into one's soul when they spoke. but he really wanted to know. elijah seemed to second-guess herself so often, he wanted her to have a chance to actually say what SHE wanted, not apollo or theon.

"did you always dream of being a rockstar?"

[misdcmeanours]

she's cute. he finishes his beer and gives her a once over. with a toned body like that–not that he's objectifying her–she had to spend time in the gym. he was looking for a gym buddy. "you're not a tremendous bitch. and nomi is. so that's a start."

he gives her a soft smile, something not many people get from him. she always did read him fairly well, probably because she was hiding her obsession with the band. he's met johnny, the boy told him his girlfriend was a fan. he knew her secrets. "i don't need naomi. and i don't want naomi. i'm not apollo deo, i don't need fake love to feel like a full person."

"oh." she wasn't expecting that from the guitarist, and part of her couldn't help but second guess it. did he really mean it? sometimes it felt like she was back in high school with naomi as the mean queen bee and theon as the hot jock who did her bidding. "what makes me better?"

she was proud that she hadn't made it obvious that she was a tantrum stan, but deep down, that was all she was. gretchen had been practically studying theon for years. "because you are close to her? you're always watching her and apollo."

[misdcmeanours]

she pulls her knees up close to her chest and laughs a bit. she didn't find humor in the situation, but all of this talk about the future did make her uncomfortable. "oh? you think so? i don't really know." she always found herself thinking that jude was perfect, and well ... she wasn't.

"i think i made it pretty far? maybe i'll stop while i'm ahead."

"do you ever think you were made for more?" (eli + jude)

"i," the angel hesitates for a moment. wouldn't that be... nice? to not know exactly what you were made for from the very moment you started existing? did humans know how lucky they were? "i, i think i've always known what i was made for. but what about you. dove?" he hoped she knew she was made for more.

"i think you could do anything."

[misdcmeanours]

the drink hitting her face was cold and a surprise to the small model. but she wasn't going to fucking take this shit from the little girl in front of her. fuck her. fuck this bitch. how dare she make her boyfriend be a good man for her? BITCH.

she stood up on her too tall heels and turned to the lana del ray knock off. with a quick "BITCH!" she struck the girl as hard as she could. grabbing her by the roots of her "REAL" hair and decided to drag her out of the club by her fucking hair. "i hope he fucks you up!"

she didn't think before she did it. she just grabbed the drink that was in front of her and threw it in the bitch's face. she'd apologize to apollo later for causing a scene... or maybe she wouldn't. magda stood, doubting that naomi would let her get away with that without some repercussions. "careful, perrita. you're the only one here without any fucking talent."

[misdcmeanours]

she hated this bitch. her preppy attitude was even more disgusting than her little bubbly laugh. why the fuck did she care so much about apollo deo? she didn't know apollo like naomi did. "he's a two timing junkie with an attitude problem? and the sooner you figure that out, love, then you'll be happier."

happier? naomi didn't give a shit about her happiness really. but then again, she was obviously falling for him. and someone needed to warn her? "PLEASE. a gentleman? you're delusional."

but she stops herself to glare. "theon's washed up. a one trick pony really. all he cares about is working out and his stupid music?"

"i don't care that he's your boyfriend." naomi could try to scare her off, but magda wasn't that girl. if this was going to end in hair pulling then naomi was going to be the one to regret it. "don't call him that, naomi."

her fingers clench into fists under the table. THIS FUCKING BITCH. this is who apollo would always pick first? "he's not pathetic or fucking needy. he's been more of a gentleman towards me than anyone else i've met on tour."

"theon seems more your type. you two deserve each other."

[misdcmeanours]

he just huffs out a little noise and smirks. she wasn't lily, that was for sure. she was very much not lily mayflower. and that's what made her interesting. but a piece of him hated her mention of naomi. no one should WANT to be naomi. and no one should know about HIS relationship with naomi. "i think you're better than both of them, actually. not to be a cunt to the ladies."

so he just takes a drink from his can and shrugs. "why is it you always assume i'm close to naomi? what if i told you i don't give a shit about her?"

she really didn't know if she should be insulted or complimented, the way that theon talked about her. she knew she wasn't hot. gretchen was the girl next door with sweet doe eyes, but theon loved to tease her... "i'm not lily mayflower, theo, and i'm also not naomi may bailey? i don't do that."

she was too soft and sweet. she always would be, and theon--- he liked drama, clearly. it didn't mean that he liked her. "you just want to watch me crash and burn so you can laugh with naomi when my head is in the toilet later."

[misdcmeanours]

"don't tell me what i can and can not call my boyfriend, maggie." she laughs in a threatening way. she didn't like her. didn't care for the singer who has her claws in her boyfriend. but she also hated it more than this bitch liking apollo, it's that she's standing up for apollo. the man who very personally fucked her life up.

she rolls her eyes as she sips on her drink. "i don't hate you for fuckin' him, love? i'm sure he was extremely pathetic and needy about it. but you could do so much better? theon is the artist?"

"don't call him that." the smile is gone from magda's face. she fucking hated this bitch, and any guilt she felt about trying to steal her boyfriend disappeared. she and apollo understood each other, understood what it was like to be seen as nothing but a sex object, as someone to use, as someone to profit from. and as much as apollo judged himself for naomi being the way that she was, magda knew she was using him just as much as his manager was.

"i've fucked him, but there wasn't much going on beyond the body," she admits, trying to at least keep the vibe a little less hostile. "i like artists."

[misdcmeanours]

he knew what he was doing. waving johnny in front of her face like that. it was rude. johnny was a stupid bitch. wasn't he? theon loves to play games and she was the newest game. he thought she'd be fun. "i'm sure he did? he'd be stupid not to? but then again, look at you? someone like you could wipe the floor with him?"

and he meant it. he meant it when he said he cared about her. but then again, theon was always hard to read. "i think you should put on something slutty and get into a bar fight to make some noise, personally."

brown eyes narrow at the rockstar in irritation. she's tempted to hit him, but she does stop herself, and grabs the ipa from his grasp instead. theon was such a fucking asshole. ( she can't believe she wasted so many nights picturing him instead of her ex-fiance. ) "excuse me? johnny said he loved me first." it was true, but gretchen had started to question even that after everything happened.

"so it's less embarrassing to be jaded and lonely?"

[misdcmeanours]

sure she wasn't fucking apollo? sure she wasn't a whore parading around as apollo's newest side piece? wasn't she as CUTE as she was stupid. she drops her martini glass on the table and hisses out a laugh. "i'm sure you aren't? but then again? why wouldn't you? look at him? everyone wants the hollywood whore?"

she knew what apollo did? and he only did it for her attention, right? so maybe now that she was back, she'd show magda just who he belongs to. "have you met theon? he has a beautiful body?"

"thank you so much!" magda's smile practically glitters it's so bright. who couldn't lover her? oh. well. did apollo tell her that? the singer stutters in her place, finally spitting out "i. i'm not fucking apollo?" flirting with, tempting, practically begging on her knees, though? that she was doing.

"but i-- i am in the market, i guess? do you know anyone?"

[misdcmeanours]

wasn't she CUTE. this little ditsy singer girl that apollo had so much to say about . . . and absolutely nothing to say about at the same time? they were obviously fucking. not that naomi cared? they were open? and besides, she had her FLINGS. theon didn't tell, and why should she? what apollo didn't know wouldn't hurt him?

she eyed the girl as she slipped in, her dress was . . . okay. not naomi's style. she wasn't apollo's type, obviously. "thank you, love. you look stunning? as always? apollo tells me you're in the market for a new boyfriend? i can help? keep you from fuckin' mine?"

she’s only ever heard that voice from the speaker of apollo’s phone, but the singer would still recognize it anywhere. FUCK. it was the girl whose life she was actively trying to ruin by stealing her boyfriend. ( not that magda believed that naomi deserved apollo, but even she knew she was biased. ) “is that naomi may bailey?” mags calls to the posh bitch seated next to a jacket she recognizes as apollo’s. She keeps her expression friendly, just the epitome of fun, ditsy girl as she slides into the booth across from naomi. "i wouln't miss it? i wanted to meet apollo's girl! love your dress, very rockstar girlfriend!"

[misdcmeanours]

@devlsbackbone "i do not fall in love with everyone that's nice to me!" (gretchen + theon)

"we both know that's not true." he mutters offhandedly as he cracks open the craft beer they were gifted in colorado. she was soft, look at her? he knew her type. he almost married her type. "what about johnny? now that's just embarrassing."