mikadolightsaber

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it's a classic scam. you buy cheap ingredients, renovate them using heat and other ingredients and flip em. by the time the cops catch up you've moved on to another dish

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being on tumblr for a long time but never reading homestuck like

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there’s a lot going on here

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Behold, my new favourite item

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ETA: Apparently this is not a new iPhone feature, but it’s one I was previously unaware about.

I have had Siri turned off since the day I learned it was possible. I still had to switch these off anyway.

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in general i dont think fandom tattoos are a bad idea but i think u need to at least give yourself like a two year buffer from the end of that piece of media before you commit. like if someone told me "yeah im obsessed with hazbin hotel rn so im gonna get a hazbin hotel tattoo" id be like woah okay maybe put a pin in that idea for later. but if someone told me "yeah i read homestuck in its prime and i still love it so im gonna get a homestuck tattoo" id be like well fair enough its been like eight years. if you still like it now you'll probably still have fond memories of it in 20 years. you do you.

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I'm watching Pingu right now and wow how did I forget that Pingu once tried to recreate the Tower of Babel.

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i hope that in 2025 u get to take more walks, read more books, connect with more people whom u love and who love u, achieve ur goals (even if ur goals are having no goals and just living in the moment), exercise fun hobbies, move from a place of self-direction, and weave together a beguiling assortment of beautiful little moments. remember that no feeling lasts forever. love u

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thanks for being nice to me. in return i will die for you and never leave your side and go grocery shopping with you.

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shorthands for dumbassery that i have grown to love deeply

"how dare you say we piss on the poor" in response to someone misinterpreting your post

"_ isnt gonna fuck you" for suck up behavior

"woah. should we tell everyone? should we throw a party?" for who the fuck cares

"and what if the world was made of pudding" for when would this ever matter.

"and sharks are smooth both ways" for a group of people heatedly arguing with 1 guy who is fucking with them all

".. but its about a witch in the alps finding her lost cat" for someone trying to sanitize something to the point of absurdity

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straight men have beauty standards for men that are completely different than the beauty standards women and gay men have for men and then they get mad when they conform to the beauty standards other podcast bros set for them and women still don’t find them attractive

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mr sandman was playing in this gas station and the cashier and i both sang “man me a sand” at the same fucking time without hesitation

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Honestly, you don't need dating advice save for "just be yourself". If a guy isn't seduced by your extensive lecture about coealacanths, or a girl isn't impressed by you gaming the McDonald's systems to finesse yourself 30 free chicken nuggets, you're on a date with the wrong person. Not a bad person, but one that isn't the right match for you, and the way you want to live.

First dates are for showing someone "hey this is the kind of life I like to be living", them doing the same, until you find someone who clicks and you both think "fuck yeah I want to live like this." Whether that's sitting in a café judging joggers, or casually committing small crime for shits and giggles.

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we really devolved as a society when we stopped using fully painted pictures on romance novels and started using cheap photoshop instead