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midnightmoviemadness · 5 years ago

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Reefer Madness

Oh noes! This motion picture may startle me!

Marihuana. The real public enemy number one.

This is a research based movie.

It will make me think (in fancy text)

This opening is actually like JRPGs where the important words are highlighted.

Parent teacher group meeting about marijuana

And on this very day, DARE was born

Because only your parents and your teachers can combat the evil of marijuana

Was that marijuana or just carrots

A cigarette making machine?! The future is now!

Here are all the places to hide your pot moms and dads

They burned the pot in the furnace and they got super high afterwards probably

Somstbinf that happened in our own city?! But that’s our city!

And there’s a war going on? Wow this day sucks

And here’s a scene where we watch a woman put on stockings. Totally normal

Yep. Plot relevant AF

I wonder if this hatred of kids will come back?

Way to go traffic cop. You totally aren’t redundant thanks to the sign next to you.

Party at grandma’s with the swimming pool!!!

The car or the girl?

And he was never seen or heard from again

That hairstyle is a choice

Was that English?

Oh no, somebody let him sit at the piano

Is that a good, god fearing, healthy cigarette or an evil marijuana cigarette

Based off his twitching, I’m going to guess regular cigarette

He went firm the dance hall to an after party, Jimmy is killing it

She didn’t add the olive oil!

Hot chocolate and studying: the only wholesome way to spend an evening

Not the worst rendition of Romeo and Juliet I’ve seen

Although it does rank behind 6th grade English class reading of it

And then he falls on his butt

Snitch!

This kid suuuuuuuucks

Jimmy has to drive AND pay for the root beer. Dude is getting screwed

Debauchery

Get it girl

Oh so my cigarettes aren’t good enough for you?

And this is how Bill gets tricked into smoking the devil’s lettuce: “hey smoke this”

With a side of “unless you’re a wimp”

Wow these guys can’t hold their weed

So is Jimmy smoking weed on purpose or are those cigarettes. It’s so confusing

Dispensaries haven’t changed too much

You can only quit if I get to kill you first

Jimmy has smoked the weed. You can tell cause he’s going almost 50 miles per hour

And he just killed a guy!

Didn’t even stop.

However, the guy didn’t look both ways before crossing the street. Tough call

Sorry but bill is now affected by reefer madness

And so is your brother

The FBI

Wait this is the guy from the beginning

The FBI can’t get involved because of no interstate travel. Obviously

File cabinets of marihauna records but we can’t do anything about it

So... you want to keep the record of the murders? That’s... suspect

Oh no! Bill’s grades are slipping!

That’s what you call a straightforward question?

Except for the audience of this movie I’m in

Oh poor Mary being stood up for her tennis date

I want a sitcom of these dealers/party hosts

Oh no Bill made out with his not girlfriend!

And now he’s headed for 3rd base

I think somebody may have spiked the pot with some cocaine

And Mary lying to protect her brother

She’s an accessory now!

Mall because of this damned marijuana

Oh no. Mary is innocenting her way to the marijuana party!

How do you not notice the smell?

Are you really going to try to put the moves on her dude?

Yes he is

Here take this cigarette. Okay!

Skeevy dude is skeevy

Well this escalated quickly

Do something Bill!

Good job

And then the gun went off. Killing Mary

So this murder has almost nothing to do with the pot and could have happened to any fight that escalated.

And he didn’t kill her because he was high he was framed

I don’t think this movie is being honest

So does the soda shop guy get whacked for this?

Jimmy welcome to the drug trade

Not this guy again

The cover story is I invited these high school kids up for beer and then one killed the other. Love it

That’s why you don’t toke before you play sports Bill

To be fair, Romeo and Juliet is hilarious

But then he got hooked on wacky tobacky

Hey I’m worried these people we are hiding might go berserk soon. That’s cool, anyway I’m out

I thought I was ordering a hit not offering to do a hit

This summation seems inflammatory

Is this about to become 12 Angry Men?

Random noose imagery

So this juror wants Bill to hang for his crimes as an example. Seems legit

I don’t think the weed is going to mellow you out dude

Marijuana seems secondary to the problems these characters have

Yep she’s really playing that piano

Maybe you’d be more convincing if you didn’t look so creepy

Once again, marijuana seems secondary to this issue. He was about to be killed so he beat the the assassin to death

And that’s how the local police saved us all from the scourge of marijuana

Plea bargain

Thursday the 17th. Got it

Flashbacks to all the good times and the one really really bad time on marijuana

Oh snap!

Once again: not marijuana related

So you’re free to go with a stern talking to. Mary is still dead

Pretty sure that isn’t the marijuana. It’s the guilt from the murder and then killing a guy

That happened? To my neighbors!

Wasn’t this the opening crawl?

But I don’t have any children

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midnightmoviemadness · 5 years ago

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Movie #1: The Cocaine Fiends (1935)

White text on a black and white background. Good start.

Apparently to stop drugs the public has to be aroused... or something like that.

Oh... this is about how cocaine is bad.

Cocaine is referred to as “dope evil.” I agree out of touch PSA film from the 30s that also sounds like an out of touch PSA film from the 2000s.

High(?) speed car chase(?)

Terrible pat down

Some guy is peddling dope to school kids!

Oh poor, sweet, innocent Jane.

And justice can’t wait for chicken dinner.

Gross old cops are gross.

But then again the guy selling dope to school children was also skeevy.

Is this bad lighting by 30s standards or is this just what movies looked like? I legitimately don’t know.

Don’t smile at him Jane. You can do better.

Gross

Cocaine as headache medicine. Not just for raves!

And she was able to snort it like a pro on the first go.

I guess time skip. Either that or this dude is moving super fast.

That’s the cocaine dependence friend.

Please stop smiling like that.

And second date marriage proposal. Those always last.

Which city is this? Or is there only the one City?

It’s a letter. And thanks to the not great quality all I got was it was an apology.

Poor Jane’s mother not getting the apology(?) letter.

And Jane finds out she’s been snorting coke for a few days/weeks

And cocaine dependence goes from I hate you to I need it now.

Gossipy town folks.

Apparently it’s been 14 months since Jane ran off.

Well If all the girls those days (the 30s) are like Jane they’re getting into cocaine against their will.

Wait he actually married her?

“Questing” for hot guys.

Handoff to the drive in waitress

And of course his dealer is coworkers with Jane’s brother.

“Dames tip in smiles not nickels and quarters” is a take

And now Eddie (the brother) is being offered cocaine cause the waitress wants to go clubbing.

And now Eddie wants to go clubbing. Because of cocaine.

Good play Eddie. Good play.

Acoustic microphone

And movie stars in clubs cry too. When their manager’s leave them for somebody else. Professionally and romantically

This guy is the father of the guy who cut in at the Enchantment Under the Sea dance in 1955.

And the mobster is cutting in on the drive in girl (not the waitress) and Eddie found Jane and in the middle of it the drive in girl’s date(?) cut in on the mobster.

$9.79 for three drinks.

And they are allowed to walk out.

Faaaaaaaaather

“With all your money we don’t seem to rate in society.” Deep man

The name of the club is The Dead Rat. I would probably go to a bar with that name.

More headache powder.

Like after this one you’re going to have to start paying for your cocaine man.

A sleigh ride with snow birds.

Apparently cocaine speeds up relationships.

And another 6 months have passed and Eddie isn’t writing letters any more.

So Jane has been married for 3 years to this mobster

And Eddie’s gf/dealer got fired from job.

And so did Eddie.

And that was either a bad cut or a missing scene.

Another marriage proposal

And they made out for so long his tea boiled over

They can’t find work and can’t pay for drugs or rent.

He can be both sick and a hop head.

Oh so he knows he’s on cocaine now too.

Find you someone that looks at you like Eddie looks at his first hit in a while.

So I think it’s implying she’s a prostitute now.

And with this act, drive-in girl learns about panhandling.

This band is awful.

Like this dude is just blatting all of his notes

Don’t clap for that

Oh noes! She’s pregnant!

I wonder how Jane is doing

You have to ask yourself who does he love move: you or the blow? It’s prolly not you though...

Wait... movie... what are you doing?

So... uh... she’s committing suicide I guess.

And now for a random music number.

Maybe with different sound mixing this performance could be good

Hey! I think this is the mobster guy! The one who married Jane.

Uh... what was that?

Another musical number. From what I believe they said was the waiter.

And both of these songs might be about cocaine If you stretch it

Fist fight at the Dead Rat

Looks like the fight was a pretense for a kidnapping.

Hey! Jane is back!

In what I assume is an opium den.

Lillth, the gangster’s discarded moll

Remember kids: girls can’t escape a life of drugs but their brother can! Thanks movie for another pearl of wisdom

Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep..........................

Wow his stealth score must be great to have gotten past the cop and the land lady.

So is this older lady a madame?

$1000 and risk bringing the mob down on her.

Yes... leave the girl.......

Also, Jane has got a gun

Drop that gat

Wait... why is he here? She never said why the cops needed to come to that address.

Sure... you phoned him

So her dad was the head of the mob who wanted to get out of the cocaine game

So he was a cop

Diagonal wipe

Vice squad

So good thing that the rich girl fell in love with the undercover cop who was only with her to get dirt on her gangster dad.

So... how are Jane and Eddie?

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