michaelpyromaniacal

[michaelpyromaniacal]

Dick, to the Titans: OK this is my little brother, everyone has to be so nice to him!

Jason, 6'4, built like a double fridge and holding a gun: Hey.

The Titans:

Years later.

Dick, to the Titans again: OK this is my even littler brother, everyone be super super nice to him!

Duke, 6'2, built like a linebacker and lit up like a glo stick: Yo.

The Titans:

Years after that.

Dick, again, to the Titans: OK this is my littlest baby brother, everyone has to be so sweet to him! He's a baby!

Damian, 18 and 6'0, made of pure muscle and holding a sword: Greetings.

The Titans: ...where are you finding these brothers.

[michaelpyromaniacal]

Guy who says “you know, the unabomber kind of had a point” but he just means that “eat your cake and have it too” is a more sensical idiom

[michaelpyromaniacal]

skarsgard’s murderbot has grown on me a lot but y’all misgendering it during pride month is kind of crazy and i hope you know that

[michaelpyromaniacal]

[michaelpyromaniacal]

Arnold Schwarzenegger mpreg movie

[michaelpyromaniacal]

“Hey, handsome. Nice ride you got there~”

“H-Hvernig ferđu ađ ūessu?!”

(inspired by @bignostalgias translations au)

[michaelpyromaniacal]

If the purpose of prison were to keep us safe, no one would even consider putting nonviolent people guilty of only victimless actions in prison.

If the purpose of the sex offender registry were to keep us safe, no one would even consider putting homeless people who urinated in public on that list.

If the purpose of the police were to keep us safe, they'd be held to the highest standards. No one would even consider giving them a free pass to kill people.

If the purpose of spanking children were a last resort to stop them from doing something really bad, no one would even consider spanking children for accidentally using the wrong tone, breathing too heavily, or rolling their eyes.

The purpose of a system is what it does.

[michaelpyromaniacal]

You have to believe, Arthur. You’re destined to be Albion’s greatest king.

MERLIN 4.13 (The Sword in the Stone, Pt.2)

[michaelpyromaniacal]

Au where merthur have soulmate identifying mark but merlin is the only one who know they are because if Arthur knew he would find out about his magic 👀 (arthur's mark being a beautiful dragon mainly on on his back but its tall is draped on his torso, a wing stretch on his right shoulder, another end on his hip and its head rest upon his stomach. As if it were jealousy protecting him. its scale are of a blue so dark it nearly look black. It has golden eye and tread of gold on is horn, gold shimmer on its body highlighting its scale at some place.

It screams powerful sorcerer.)

And thus it doesn't change anything from the show. Merlin doesn't tell him not even at the very end (Merlin's mark is a smaller red dragon with its head on his shoulder and who is is holding itself on his shoulder)

It would be very angsty but also SO FUNNY if in a post return futur where arthur (Gwen, the knights) are very confuse and lost but luckily for them there exist multiple center for "People who got Teleported at the wrong place/Bought back from the dead? We are here to help!/ your five yo drank a weird potion? No problem! Etc" basically Magic help center.

Just imagine basic social worker sorcerers who tries to do their job at 3 am and see THE Emrys mark ™ on a random dude and they are like *gasp*.

Them : what the fuck

Arthur :???

Them :WHAT THE FUCK

the others :????

Them : we are calling your soulmate RIGHT NOW. WHAT THE FUCK should I call the government too???? I'M NOT PAY ENOUGH FOR THIS.

Arthur : my???

Them : YOU. DO NOT MOVE IF I LOSE YOU I'M DEAD. DEAD.

You can imagine arthur pendragon pacing like a 13 years old stressed before an oral presentation because even if he was afraid then thought he globally didn't really care about his soulmate. He realised that it wasn't so much that he didn't care but he thought it would simply never be so he just... Kinda forgot about it. Now he just can not put it away because is soulmate IS coming and WHERE IS MERLIN WHEN HE NEEDS HIM (he is blocking any thoughts about Merlin potential dead thank you very much)

(Gwen is currently finding the situation extremely funny because she figured out in 5x13 and she is 80 yo (in a younger body but still) . And she is waaaayyyyyy to old to see her former husband stay in his denial.

Leon is 78 years old and he is slowly recognising the dragon in question that look very much like Merlin's family crest. He is looking at his wife in a very conspiracy way.

Gwaine is currently not really giving a damn about the whole soulmate thing. What do you MEAN you can send messages to people in less that a second?!?!?

Elyan would usually not give a damn but he is very much not happy ™ to find out that his sister (first) husband had a soulmate mark who isn't dead and he is glaring at Arthur but he is also getting a hug from gwen so it doesn't look menacing at all.

Perceval (57) is right behind Gwaine but he is currently watching himself in the mirror because seeing his younger self again is weird asf

Meanwhile Lancelot is talking with the assistant (on the verge of a break down because they are going to see the GOD OF MAGIC OH MY GOD) about magical history

[michaelpyromaniacal]

I was thinking about that post that point out Merlin and Arthur could have children bacause Merlin can change into a woman but (hear me out) I think people are way to focused on the sex part of creating a child when we are talking about magic (yes I understand that they were more likely speaking out of horniness, gender exploration,… and that’s 100% valid and I’m not above it & I like gender exploration story BUT) because like it’s magic

It would be so fucking funny if in a not-together-yet-merthur au, Merlin try to make Arthur pregnant and it’s just Merlin sending ‘death’ glare at Arthur for hours, days, WEEKS on end. There is 0 sexy time, 0 seduction happening and even 0 pregnancy symptoms when it happens.

Just Merlin walking to Arthur like : I resolved your heir problem !!!! you are pregnant :D

Arthur : what did you drink now.

*3 months later*

Arthur, glowing : ??? ??? *glowing harder until a child materializes in his arms*

Arthur. : 😦

The baby : 😃

Arthur : ….MERLIN

Arthur is very affronted about the fact that Merlin ‘knocked him’ up before 1. Marrying him (how dare he and no he isn’t a poor maiden but he will still be mad about it) 2. Having sex for the first time (Arthur : if Gwaine learn about this and call me the Virgin Mary I swear to God—)

((As I said I’m not above it and yes they fuck nasty about it))

[michaelpyromaniacal]

how insane must it have felt to be an actor table reading for bbc merlin. alright anthony this week, you are driven mad by memories of the children you killed in your genocide. next week? bald.

[michaelpyromaniacal]

2025 and im still not over her

[michaelpyromaniacal]

Literally just made a Tumblr to scream about her. I have no clue how anything works here 🫡

[michaelpyromaniacal]

Merlin: Remember that time Gwen tried to kill Arthur and framed me for it?

Arthur: What?

Gwen: *Ignoring Arthur* Remember the time you spent like two days ACTUALLY trying to kill Arthur, and Gaius and I had to keep knocking you out?!

Arthur: I'M SORRY?!?!

[michaelpyromaniacal]

MERLIN 1.07 | The Gates of Avalon

[michaelpyromaniacal]

Leon trying to get Merlin out and succeeding(at last!)

Merlin complaining

Cafe

The inspiration meme

[michaelpyromaniacal]

Merlin, after fixing yet another love enchantment attempt: Why did the potion work on everyone, but Leon?

Gaius: Well, love potions can be tricky. If a persons heart is already completely in love with and wholly devoted to someone, the effect might not take hold

Arthur: But Leon isn’t courting anyone?

Merlin: I wonder who his true love is

- - - - - -

Leon, alone in his bedroom: Man, I love The Knights code