metapianycist

[metapianycist]

What I said: No Worries

What I meant: Endless worries. More worries than your feeble, mortal mind could possibly comprehend. I will spare you the immense, incomprehensible burden of how many worries.

[metapianycist]

autism

[metapianycist]

my peasant ancestors in poland experienced long harsh winters in the mountains and were repeatedly suffering famines or fleeing from imperial Russian armies, and that's why i have all these emotional support blood lipids

[metapianycist]

I've had a small muscle twitch in my leg for three days and it is sensory hell 🙃

[metapianycist]

grunkle stan: welcome to the mystery shack, where we're having a HUGE SALE grunkle stan: everything's discounted! grunkle stan: everything must go! grunkle stan: THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THE GOVERNMENT AGENTS PARKED OUTSIDE JUST GET IN HERE AND BUY EVERYTHING

[metapianycist]

greg overthegardenwall is one of the most realistic kids i've seen in media. he's sweet and caring, but kind of annoying sometimes, prone to wander off or ramble about things, working on logic that only makes sense in his own head...exactly what real life kids are like

[metapianycist]

Why does Mr Beast look like that, I expected a 1970s wrestler with enough body hair to overflow the fall harvest baskets and a brillo pad beard. He isn't even sweaty, he isn't even sweaty!

[metapianycist]

[metapianycist]

there is literally no excuse not to read animorphs. the writers released them all as pdfs and they're so so short. sure there's a lot of them, but if you only have a chance to read one a week, you'll still be done in a year!

[metapianycist]

animorphs: read these 54+ books for children. they will literally change your life

[metapianycist]

yesterday when i was cooking, some oil splattered and a drop landed on my eyelid.

thank fuck for blink reflexes and the leidenfrost effect, for preventing me from getting an eye injury or developing any kind of real burn

[metapianycist]

the atla universe invented the concept of therapy specifically to get the gaang some help

[metapianycist]

My theory of adhd management is that in order to focus there are 4 things that need to be sufficiently occupied:

Eyes

Ears

Hands (or body)

Brain

And if you aren’t occupying them enough or there’s too many things demanding the use of one, it’ll start to wreck havoc on your ability to do things.

So for example, listening to a podcast. This occupies your ears and brain as you focus on both listening and processing what you hear, but it leaves your hands and eyes completely without anything to do. If you tried to sit down and just listen to a podcast by itself you’d probably get unbearably bored and stop doing it.

But if you pair that activity with something that uses your hands and eyes, like a craft, household chore, or commute, suddenly you’re fully plugged in and can in fact focus better on both tasks than you could if you tried doing them separately.

It’s also why you can’t listen to a podcast while doing homework; you’re trying to use your brain for two different tasks. To occupy your ears while doing homework (which is already using eyes, brain, and hands) you need something for your ears that doesn’t require your brain: music. Specifically music that doesn’t use too much brain power, which is why some people prefer instrumentals or songs in other languages.

Hyperfixation and sensory overload change this by moving the threshold for how much sensory input you need to be able to function. If I’m extremely focused on a craft project (eyes, hands, brain) I might not even need something for my ears; my interest in the project makes up for it. If i’ve had a very overwhelming day, trying to listen to an audiobook while I do some stretches could be too much to process. My brain needs a break.

Video games, which pretty much universally occupy all 4 areas, are basically instant, easy focus wrapped up in a neat little bow. No wonder adhd-havers tend to love them.

If you’re struggling with a task, try looking at which areas it occupies and which are left unattended. Then try to find something enjoyable to fill those gaps, and see if that helps.

[metapianycist]

sokka: we know that, back home, zuko kept getting bullied by his sister, right aang: ...right sokka: we should make him feel at home sokka: TOPH! sokka: go bully zuko! toph: can do

[metapianycist]

I'm trying to push "just" as a minimizer further out of my vocabulary, not to eliminate but to crack down on using it. I don't need to use it as often as I do, and then I'll poke around and see stuff like "it just happens to intersex people" or "intersexism is just an edge case" or other language along that lines, and that's kinda where I notice the word "just" has some claws deeper in my brain than I would like because it's super easy to roll with that. "Oh well that's fair it's just a little small amount." And that's just fucked up I think.

Cuz that sort of minimizing language has been around forever. Oh it's just intersex people, oh it's just trans people, oh it's just gay people, oh honestly, how much could that part of the population be, ten people? But it's always tens of thousands, hundreds of thousands, millions however you cut it. Like you live in a small town, a thousand people, if intersex people are "just" one percent of the population, maybe ten people there might be intersex and you probably know one or two. You meet a hundred, a thousand people, more in your life, it means you probably met someone intersex or trans or queer or all of that. In a global population of seven billion people you can six degrees your way to famous actors Kevin Bacon and he's one guy. That "just" thing, that easy and agreeable minimizing sentiment, it's tricky and so I'm trying to make it a caution point. It's just language though, just one word that happens to be widely used by millions of people and which directs your brain to think a certain way because language is how we share our brains.

Anyway this is too long.

[metapianycist]

Gamerbros peppering in "DEI" where they used to pepper in "SJW" just sound like the most out-of-touch conspiracy theorists to anyone with, like, a regular office job

Because, like, SJW was, to anyone who knew anything about it, an obvious way to say "marginalised people I don't want to listen to", but to normal people, it did at least evoke an image of, like, the most annoying vegan they'd ever met or whatever

But "DEI" is such a boring corporate thing to anyone with an actual job with actual DEI policies that peppering it into a video on videogames makes it super obvious that you've fallen down a conspiracy theory rabbit hole

Like, if you say "DEI" to a regular fucking office worker, it just evokes an image of, like, meetings that end with "Yes, we will consider not putting meetings around school pick-up times so that staff members who are parents can utilize their flexi-hours more easily to do the school run"

And, like, at least with politicians, the obvious substitute they're trying to make is for affirmative action, which yeah, from my outside-the-US perspective, I can see how that's an easier substitute

But when you're complaining about there being too many women and POC in videogames, DEI is such an obviously nonsense thing that only someone deep in the conspiracy-theory rabbit-hole would say to anyone with, again, a normal fucking office job

[metapianycist]

i am constantly forgetting that the Normal™ amount of pain for other people is zero. my partner frequently has to accompany me to doctor and specialist appointments because i will otherwise significantly under-rate the amount of discomfort I'm in, resulting in my doctors and specialists concluding that my level of pain is much more manageable than it is.

for hypermobility in particular, this means i never remember to tell doctors that writing still hurts, crochet and sewing still hurt, holding a physical book to read it still fucks up my arms/hands, and I've had the same muscle knot in my shoulder for 20 years.

i want to say this is part trauma response (subconsciously trying not to Burden Others with my Medical Stuff) and part my autistic trait of assuming that my atypical sensory experiences that I've developed coping mechanisms for (regardless of actual efficacy of coping mechanism) are typical sensory experiences and coping mechanisms.

I swear, if I have yet another fucking thing that I have been painstakingly explaining to doctors for years and just hearing "idk, no idea what that could be, sounds like you're fine" only to discover that I've been listing a pretty textbook list of symptoms for something that's commonly co-morbid with ADHD and autism this whole time, I'm gonna be mad

Especially if, once again, the answer was a pretty simple treatment that I could have had this whole time