mercurysowntwenty-two

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the r/curatedtumblr -> tumblr migration is so funny to me. it's like going to the zoo and enjoying it so much you climb into the enclosure to live with the monkeys

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4 prisoners immolated themselves protesting the conditions in Virginia

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Go Girls Go! | First Dyke March in Washington DC, 1993

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"when i was your age, netflix came to our house in the mail" never gets old. they don't believe you, because they can't, because they cannot conceive the apparatus by which this would be true. but it is true. they mailed me season 1 of the sopranos with stamps. with fucking stamps man

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Oh my god i said last night that this doge shit was making me feel like oppenheimer and now trump is comparing it to the manhattan project... Too on the nose. too on the nose. this is going to make me break my weed break early i need to use a substance or two

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Me, fighting a yoga mom in the organic food market circa 2023: take your hand off that peach or I’ll vaccinate your children against polio

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The people who police your gender will police your gender even if you're cis.

Eat them.

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Sauron: “I like your Silmarils”

Morgoth: “Thanks, I stole them from the president”

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this is KILLING me

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the first law of tragedies: the end is already written and inevitable. the second law of tragedies: your actions are all your own and you can choose to get off this ride whenever you want. the third law of tragedies: we both know that you are never going to do that.

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this is how you know Twitter is officially cooked

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coworker: hey you should come look at the results of a ph test for a customer’s water

me: I’m king of busy rn

coworker: no really just come here

the ph test:

my honest reaction: