meltakesthecake

[meltakesthecake]

[meltakesthecake]

@mwwwbqqqq I know I reblogged this from you but literally #MBWorkBitch2019 Let’s work on all aspects of our mental, physical and emotional health and fucking Get It.

if you want a nice body, go get it. if you want to become a lawyer, study your ass off. if you want nice hair, pick a style and get it done. stop being afraid and motivate yourself. find yourself. find your happiness, because it’s out there waiting for you.

[meltakesthecake]

also explains why conservatives and neoliberal centrists actually prefer higher tuition fees rather than making tertiary education free.

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Girls don’t want guys Girls want full length Broadway musicals professionally recorded and put on Netflix

[meltakesthecake]

sometimes i have too many emotions and sometimes i have none at all but i always always feel like i’m drowning

[meltakesthecake]

AT MY AUTOPSY:

mortician: *makes the first incision*

me: *confetti comes flying out of my chest cavity with a little trumpet noise*

[meltakesthecake]

@mwwwbqqqq ugh yes. “Even the fat disgusting whale whores don’t want to have sex with me.” Ummm why don’t you read that sentence back and see if you can tell where you went wrong here you know?

None of the ugly men seeking relationships with women who think people should look past what they look like for their personality seek women for the same thing.

[meltakesthecake]

3 am is such a powerful time. there are people sleeping. there are people partying. there are people having a movie marathon. there are people crying. there are people loving. there are people dying. there are people living. toegther at 3 am.

[meltakesthecake]

the best part about stranger things is that they can’t solve anything until they put the three groups together because each group is acting within a separate genre

mike, lucas, dustin, and el are in a weird sci-fi coming of age story where the group of plucky misfit kids solve the mystery and test their friendship along the way

nancy and jonathan are in a horror movie where the teenagers have to kill the monster set against a backdrop of high school drama and romance

joyce and hopper are in a conspiracy thriller where the adults have to figure out what shady stuff the government is up to while also dealing with the difficulties of their personal lives

they all approach the issue within the confines of their genre, but none of those approaches work because none of them are seeing the whole picture. it’s only when all the threads start to converge that they can actually get anything done.

[meltakesthecake]

My hobbies include

-overeating -oversleeping -overreacting

[meltakesthecake]

“a no-sex bar sounds like a superb idea” do you think people just fuck in bars.  like you go into a bar theres just a fucking wild orgy happening on the tables and like one guy on the side drinking 

[meltakesthecake]

What I thought reading as an English major would be: Ah, let me relax under this tree in a warm sweater and read this classic piece of literature.

What reading as an English major actually is: I have two days to read this 500 page novel about a bunch of horrible people who I think are all cheating on each other but I'm not sure because this writing style is nearly incomprehensible.

[meltakesthecake]

ME. WHY AREN’T PEOPLE ALWAYS TALKING ABOUT HOW DELICIOUS JUICE IS?

god i really just wanna drink juice all the time

[meltakesthecake]

@mwwwbqqqq

#a mood

[meltakesthecake]

do i even really have imposter syndrome

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Will sexual harassment discussions ever advance to the core issue of women’s status as consumable sex objects instead of centering on when and where it’s inappropriate to consume us? Tune in next century.

[meltakesthecake]

WHEN will 2017’s hottest trend (firing sexual predators) hit the white house???