meimalr

[meimalr]

CRAWLING BACK TO YOU - SOPHIA LAFORTEZA

wordcount: 6k~

tags: angst, reader is down baddd, Sophia is conflicted, pt. 2 in the works I promise, kissing here and there, yearning, reader needs to stand up, implied sex, there will be a happy ending in pt. 2 (mayhaps!), they live in the US for the plot

Sophia was always meant for the glamour, the lights. You had always said you agreed. But then she started running, and you don't think you can catch up.

a/n: ignore the fact that i was gone for a month things happened 😭✋

You and Sophia had been friends since you first learned what the word meant.

You and Sophia had been best friends since you first learned what the word meant.

The two of you were inseparable. In a small town like yours, where there’s not much to do and no one to see, it was certain that the bond between you two could only blossom.

You met Sophia when you were six years old and still couldn’t properly control your motor skills. You had accidentally slapped her in the face during break time in class and even with all her crying you couldn't help but laugh.

No surprise that she slapped you right back and both of you were sent home for the day with lectures from your parents.

Fortunately, the original violence the both of you showed to each other never escalated, and you eventually found solace being around Sophia.

The two of you were eight years old when she first said she wanted to perform on stage. 

It was one of those assignments in school—the ones where teachers ask the question of “what do you want to be when you grow up?” to children that can barely fathom a number past 100. You were stuck staring at the paper in front of you, pencil tapping against the edge of your desk in annoyance as you couldn’t think of what to write down. Sophia was beside you, scribbling down more than what was needed for the question. Frustrated at the question’s simpleness and Sophia’s excessive writing, you glanced her way and immediately simmered down at the stars that shone in her eyes. And as she shoved her crumpled paper in your view, you could only see two words.

 “A star!”

Written in bolded letters, outlined and underlined, five different colors for each letter. The exclamation mark was a mix of all of them, the colours swirling together so much they made your own head spin. She was so sure, so confident at such a young age and you couldn’t help but be jealous. Not because she already knew what she wanted to be, but because she spared no thought at leaving you for a world that only she could participate in. You weren’t meant for the spotlight.

But you only laughed at her because what else could you do? You snatched the paper from her, adding drawings in the corners of the page, signing your scratched up name underneath them like she was your fan. Like your signature was something she would seek out and dream of late at night as if it were all she could think of.

“A star?” You questioned while drawing, a smirk tugging at your lips. “You better not shine too bright and forget about me.”

She gasped as if such a thing was impossible and got up from her chair in a flash, hugging you so tight you couldn’t move the pencil anymore. 

“I could never forget about you!” 

And as she said the words you looked down at the half finished heart you were drawing on the paper, your eight year old mind saying she couldn’t be lying.

You were fifteen years old when you started looking at Sophia differently. It had most likely started before that age in smaller ways, but fifteen was when it really felt real. 

Your eyes would linger on her lips much longer than necessary when she was speaking to you. You’d hug her a beat longer. Try to stay near her as much as possible as if you two weren’t already inseparable. 

Sophia had noticed it too. And the worst thing for your mind was that she didn’t shy away from the extra contact.

She’d raise her eyebrows as you stared at her lips and smile after a few seconds, laughing as she pushed you away and said that her eyes were higher on her face. When you’d try to leave a hug, embarrassed that you had shoved your head into the crook of her neck, she’d hold onto your waist tighter, whispering in your ear that she didn’t want to let go either. When you tried to speak to other people in social gatherings she’d grip your wrist as tight as possible, exclaiming that she didn’t know anyone and that you were her only friend.

You knew she was lying. Sophia was the talk of the town. She was the girl that was definitely going places—the girl that may finally put the unknown place on the map. Everyone knew her, everyone wanted to talk to her. But when she said those things to you, claiming that you were the only one she could face, it made your heart beat in irregular patterns not even a musician could follow along with. 

But then friends would approach when you two were hugging a little longer and she would snap to attention, pushing you away from her as if you were a poisonous gas she couldn’t breathe in. She’d ignore you as you stood there in shock, unable to react at how fast she could pull all the love you felt from your soul. 

Sophia could control you, and you didn’t mind offering yourself up to her.

It was one of those nights where the two of you were in Sophia’s room late at night. The annoying thought of school the next day was forgotten and buried deep into the caves of your minds as the both of you giggled beside each other, rolled up in her sheets and talking about anything and everything. 

Your giggles died down as you stared into each other’s eyes, chests moving up and down, faces flushed. She glanced toward her door, her lip stuck between her teeth, something she always did when she was deep in thought. 

“Soph?”

She shook her head, leaving her stupor as she raised her body and laid her head on her hand.

“Y/n,” She started, her eyes looking everywhere but yours. “You know when we were young, and I was always talking about wanting to be a singer?”

You laughed at the memory, nodding along at her story, “Of course I remember.”

“I really want to, Y/n,” She said, eyes clasped together as if she could already imagine the life behind her eyelids, in the dark of her own mind where only she could be. “I really want to sing. And dance. And perform.”

“Well that's good! I know that you can do it.” 

You didn’t know what else to say. 

“It just means that…” She paused, trying to find the right words. “I’ll just be a bit busier, you know? Won’t always have time for nights like these.”

You laid there in silence for a bit, letting the words sink deep into your chest as your heart struggled to find a way to deal with them.

“Soph. I’ve said it before. I’ll always be with you, no matter what you try to do.”

“Y/n, you don’t understand. I’m going to be focused on starting a career—making a name for myself–”

You shut her mouth by pressing yours against hers, your hands placed on either side of her face. Her eyes were wide open with surprise, but she quickly shut them the deeper the two of you got into the kiss. The two of you backed away for a breath and you scooted yourself further away from her—practically falling off the bed.

“I’m-” you gasped for breath, your chest enclosing around your heart. “I don’t know what came over me, Sophia.”

Her eyes scrunched tight at the lack of a nickname and you almost reached out toward her to console her, but you didn’t. You had stepped into her space. All because you could never stop loving Sophia, and you never thought to wonder if she felt the same.

You tried unwrapping your legs from the tangles that laid beneath the layers of sheets that seemed to be never ending, but as you were getting up from the bed her hand caught your wrist.

You turned to look at her, and her eyes were still blown wide, as if she had been transported to a different world while you were still struggling to maintain your sanity in this one.

“Don’t go Y/n!” She begged, her eyes finally focusing on your frazzled look and anxious eyes. You couldn’t bear to look at her.

She pulled you back down onto the bed and you reluctantly let her, still attempting to keep a respectable amount of space between the both of you. 

“I’m sorry Soph,” You said, making sure to shorten her name so as to not ruin her mood even more. 

She simply shook her head in response. “Y/n. I liked it.”

Your heart stopped beating again. Or maybe it was beating too fast. You couldn’t tell due to the overwhelming amount of thoughts infiltrating your head at the words that left her mouth.

She reached for your hands again and tugged you closer to her body, staring into your eyes for permission. You nodded slightly, a movement so small you almost thought she didn’t catch it, but it was enough for her.

Sophia’s hands were the ones to find your cheeks now, her lips pressing into yours as if they had no business being elsewhere. Your noses bumped, and she giggled through the kiss causing a smile to appear on your face as well. Her lips left your own as they peppered your face. She left kisses everywhere, from your cheeks to your chin to your forehead. You couldn’t stop giggling even after you pushed her away gently with the tips of your fingers, breathless from the joy your heart couldn’t contain. 

“Thank you for that, Soph.”

“I should be thanking you, Y/n.” She laughed loud, the sound piercing the softness of the room. “You always know what to say when I’m feeling nervous.”

You only shifted closer to her, wrapping your legs around hers as you traced your finger around her face, drawing constellations that your mind made up in the moment. Constellations that would only belong to the love that you two held.

At fifteen, your heart had only just begun its journey with Sophia.

You thought the kiss would mean something. Anything. Not just a fluke that had happened behind closed doors between two stupid kids who didn’t know how to communicate. But Sophia didn’t believe that. 

She ignored you the next day at school, steering far away from you whenever you approached. People noticed. People gossiped and talked because that was all they were good for in this town. 

The kids at school couldn’t help but whisper when you passed, talking about how the two of you had never spent a day of school separated. And they were right. You couldn’t remember the last time the both of you weren’t together. 

You didn’t think the kiss was that bad. Sure it was sudden, and Sophia had gone quiet after the moment, seemingly stuck in her mind. She whispered into the night that the two of you should sleep, and you agreed, falling asleep in her arms.

But you should’ve known. It was something she always did. When you two got too close—too physical—she’d back away like she wanted to be anywhere else. Like the look in your eye was more than simply love, like it was hurting her. 

You decided that the smart thing to do was to corner her after school. She always left from the back doors, that exit being the closest to her home.

As the bell rang for that school day, its piercing tone enough to send students running down the hall screaming in uncontained joy, you had only one goal in mind.

You ventured toward the back exit you and Sophia always took together. The one that held memories of two girls hand in hand, laughing and screaming as they ran the doors that held them in the prison they deemed school. You could see her in the corridor by the drama room doors, books held close to her chest as she leaned against the wall speaking to a fellow classmate. Sophia laughed—-the kind of laugh that she only let out with you. The one that she deemed “too loud” and “embarrassing”. The one that you said sounded beautiful and at that moment she promised would be heard by your ears and your ears only. But you didn’t own her. You didn’t own Sophia’s heart, no matter how much you wished you did. So you tensed your shoulders and let your heart close around itself. Her laugh wasn’t only yours to hear anymore. 

You walked down the hallway, footsteps heavy and gaze set on her. She could feel your eyes burning a spot on the back of her neck, and she turned around, a curious look on her face. The girl saw you approaching her and quickly said her goodbyes to her friend, walking away from you toward the doors that would only lead her further away from you. 

Was she really trying this hard to avoid you?

You sped up and crossed the hallway in large strides. Even if it felt like she was attempting to avoid you the whole day, she was walking suspiciously slow considering she didn’t want you to reach her.

“Soph!” You yelled as she had one foot out of the door.

You saw her shoulders tense upwards and she turned around, her eyes darting across the hallway as students turned to face you two. She grimaced when they started whispering and made a motion with her hand, ushering you closer to her.

Once you were close enough she encircled your wrist with her hand and pulled you outside. You stumbled forward and chastised her aggressiveness, but she paid no mind to you, only looking at your fellow classmates that wouldn’t stop staring. 

“Y/n,” she said, crossing her arms over her chest, finally acknowledging you once the doors shut behind the both of you.

“Don’t Y/n me,” you spat out, annoyed at her audacity. “You’ve been ignoring me all day. You don’t get to speak to me like I did something.”

“Yeah well there’s a really obvious reason I’ve been ignoring you, isn’t there?” She spoke, her voice rising as the sentence went on. “You kissed me Y/n.”

She put a strain on the word. Like it was forbidden. As if her kissing you was a mistake when last night she was the one that couldn’t stop pulling you closer, whispering words into your ears that made you flush.

“I kissed you?” You questioned furiously, and she put a hand over your mouth dragging you further away from the school.

You ripped her hand off of your face and put distance between the both of you, stepping away from her.

“You kissed me back Sophia. Don’t turn this into something it isn’t.”

Her eyes held guilt at your tone and she mumbled an apology. Wind nipped at your bodies, the silence of the afternoon eerie. Sophia’s absent voice wasn’t helping. She was never this quiet.

“You said that you liked it.” Your eyebrows furrowed, a frustrated look on your face. Did she lie to you?

“And I did like it. I really did. I just don’t know what to do,” she replied, pulling her lip between her teeth again. Her confusion made you want to reach out and console her, but you held yourself back. 

“Then stop ignoring me. Talk to me. Like you always have.”

“I think we have to keep this between us.”

She wanted you to be a secret. Of course she did. 

“I can’t have anything happen while I’m trying to start my career. Things get out—they’ll spread without me wanting them to. I don’t want you to be dragged under if that ever happens.”

You nodded along like you didn’t mind being a dirty secret she could step on and squish beneath her shoes. As if you didn't mind that she could simply ignore you for the rest of her life and deny knowing you. As if it was okay that she had imprinted on your heart, and left her own empty, only using you for distractions.

You knew all these things and yet your stupid self agreed to be kept hidden.

“We don’t have to do anything you're uncomfortable with, Sophia,” you muttered, head down, staring at your shoes as you kicked rocks along the ground. Measuring the distance between each different one as it slowly got larger.

She nodded and smiled, all teeth like the one you were used to. 

“Then do you wanna come over again today? Perhaps do a little bit more than just study together.” She waggled her eyebrows like the old Sophia, and you giggled, heart eyes staring at her like she could do no wrong. 

All she needed was a smile from you to grab your wrist and pull you towards her, running down the street together. 

Then she let out that honeyed laugh, the one that made you feel like you were special. And you foolishly believed it.

Three years later, at eighteen—between nights when you two spent hours huddled close to each other, kisses on every part of each other’s bodies, hands in places they normally didn't belong—Sophia started realising that her dream was no longer that. Her dream was becoming a reality. 

She really hit it off. Her dancing abilities were improving at speeds you couldn’t seem to grasp. Her singing—which was already beautiful to you—became an art that couldn’t escape your mind. A voice that stayed in the corners of your brain, rearing its head whenever you started to get distracted. Reminding you that Sophia would never leave your thoughts. 

Nights that you used to spend tangled in each other’s arms became impossible. She couldn’t possibly stay up that late, doing things that weren’t important. She said that she had to wake up early, train late, sleep late, and repeat. That there was no time for you two to hang out like you used to.

She called it “hanging out”. 

You two were only “hanging out” when you’d pour your heart out onto the messy sheets that laid beneath your quivering bodies, its contents spilling out freely even though Sophia was never there to catch the outpour.

It was only a friendly hang out when you’d trace the pad of your thumb across her lips, your eyes never leaving hers. Whisper words of encouragement when she felt like she couldn’t do it. Listen to things you didn’t want to hear. Speak when you knew she wanted you to. Stay quiet when it was only her time to talk. Nod when necessary. Sit there as if you didn’t have hopes and dreams. Sit there as if you weren’t also a person that had wants and needs. 

She called you one night. When you were hanging out with friends you had made when Sophia couldn’t possibly talk to you. 

It was one call at first. You genuinely thought she had dialed you by mistake. It was much too late in Sophia’s schedule for her to be awake, especially for her to be calling you of all people.

Then it became incessant. A constant buzzing deep in the pocket of your jeans as you laughed with people that made you feel whole again. They’d glance down at your pocket, an eyebrow raised in confusion, asking if you would answer it. You chuckled awkwardly and said it was nothing. Just some app giving you notifications you never asked for.

But it wasn’t nothing. It definitely wasn’t ‘nothing’ when you excused yourself to the bathroom, hands fumbling, almost dropping your phone as you struggled to answer her call. She hadn’t called you first in such a long time. As evil as it sounded—it felt good to be the one she so desperately needed.

“Y/n.” 

Her voice crackled through the call, it sounded rough from hours spent crying, hiccuping fears into a room that held no consolation. 

Your heart broke a little. No matter how much you bandaged it with things that distracted you, a simple word from her could have it cracking again. 

You were at her home the fastest you possibly could’ve made it. Your friends whined at your sudden need to leave, but your wide eyes held all the explanation they could ever ask for.

The steps to her room felt like they couldn’t go any slower. The stairs—ones you used to skip upward with her—seemed dark and gloomy. The door to her room invited you in as if you only belonged there and nowhere else. 

She was unmoving under her covers. You could still hear her sniffles, quiet, seeking comfort. You slipped into the bed beside her, hugging your arms around her form.

“Soph,” You whispered, rubbing your thumb around her waist in small circles. “What’s going on?”

“It feels like I’m not gonna make it. Everyone seems so much better—they dance so fluidly, sing so smoothly. I can’t catch up.” 

You disagreed with everything she said. And you were being honest. You wished Sophia could see herself from your eyes. Even if it were just for a moment. To you, Sophia danced like she controlled the elements. Her movements were sharp, confident, but they still held grace that kept you enraptured. When she invited you to watch her perform to a song, mostly for insight, but also for the moments that happened afterwards, you’d sit there, head in your palms as you couldn’t look away.

And the way she sang. Her voice was like honey, its tone so powerful that it made you want to fall asleep and dream of it in a land where it was the only thing of importance. Emotions that she never shared with you would escape into a song that would remain in your head for the rest of week.

“I dreamt about you nearly every night this week,” you whispered. “I think that shows how much of an imprint you leave on someone’s mind.”

She let out a wet laugh and turned toward you in bed, wrapping her arms around your waist as well. 

“I can’t believe you anymore, Y/n. You just say things like that because you love me.”

Your heart stopped, and you wanted to drop to your knees and exclaim to her and anyone listening that it was because you loved her so much you couldn’t love anyone else. But that would be too much. So you only laughed and told her that anyone would think the same.

Sophia seemed to remember you again that week. Called you over every night knowing that you would never fail to show up. Your friends thought that you had found a partner. They smiled knowingly when you said that you had to leave early from a party, giggling like school-children at the prospect of you finding love. How you wished Sophia would consider you her girlfriend, or just something more than an ocean of support. Constantly dipping her hand in, retracting it when something she didn’t like would swim to the surface.

One night your fingers dragged down her body, so gentle that you almost couldn’t tell if you were actually touching her. You marked every beauty mark and crevice that laid on her skin. She couldn’t stop giggling as she tried to smack your hands away, claiming that your touch tickled. You simply let out a breath at her actions and continued your movements.

“I want to be the only one that knows this. That sees this. I want to be the first one to have drawn constellations all over your body. To have connected my soul to yours.” 

She laid quietly, no longer smiling, a look in her eye that you couldn’t quite decipher.

Sophia caught your hand in hers and brought it to her face, laying your fingers across her cheek as she stared into your eyes. 

“Y/n, you’ll always be the only one to know me. No matter what.”

Sophia Laforteza always knew what to say. She was so perfect—so orderly and confident. 

Sophia had always known what to say, but she still could never sit still and say that she claimed you as hers. 

The only thing Sophia owned was her dreams, not your heart.

You knew it was bad to fall for her when she would never reciprocate unless it was in the darkness of her room, but you couldn’t help but lean in at her words. Your bodies molded together, perfect for each other but still so unhealthy for you.

You didn’t stop showing up for Sophia. Even when the two of you were twenty and you lived different lives. 

She called occasionally, updating you about her journey and training. Ranting to you about the moments that felt hard and the moments that made her want to continue to be a star. 

Then one night she called—told you to come over like she always did. She wasn’t sad. She sounded ecstatic. Her voice was happier than it had ever been in the past five years.

“I made it, Y/n.”

You cheered and clapped, but then stopped and stood for a moment, confused as to what she was saying.

“Made it into what?”

“Dream Academy! I’m going to actually train. With other people. With professionals.”

“Thats amazing, Soph,” you said softly. And you were genuinely proud of her, even if it meant that she’d only get busier. She smiled at the nickname, a smile so reminiscent of the girl you knew when you were younger.

“The thing is,” She paused, biting her lip like she always did when she was about to break your heart into impossibly small pieces. “It’s in LA, and it’s starting in less than two months.” 

At twenty, you thought that Sophia would never be able to surprise you again. That you were used to her pulling things up on you without warning you beforehand. Leaving you to scramble and figure something out for yourself. 

But Sophia Laforteza was always made of surprises, and she wouldn’t stop now.

You brushed it off, saying two months was plenty of time for you and Sophia to hang out before she left you for an undefined amount of time. She laughed and pushed you onto her bed, whispering words laced with poison that never failed to trick you.

“What are we going to do now?” You whispered from behind her, arms tight around her midriff and breath seeping into the hairs on her neck. 

“We only have two months left together,” you said again, pulling her impossibly closer to you. “Let’s do something fun.”

She didn’t respond. She never responded after times like these. Someone who was so expressive and couldn’t stop talking seemingly everywhere else knew exactly how to stop when it mattered.

She never responded but her silence always said more than her words ever could.

Nothing. There was nothing you two could do. 

Around a week before Sophia was set to leave for Los Angeles, she asked you to visit her. It had been weeks of radio silence beforehand, but you still went against your better judgment and said yes. 

The two of you laid in bed—a familiar position you’d been in multiple times before. Hands moving up and down her body, tracing your name and messages deep into her skin that only you could decipher alone. Her hands rested on your own body, unmoving, but pressing deep into your bones.

“So…” Sophia started, slow breaths escaping her mouth, speaking slowly to ease you into her next words. “This is it.”

Your hands slowed their movements across her body, coming to a halt and falling by her side, limp. 

“What do you mean by ‘this is it’, Soph,” you said, eyebrows scrunched together in concern.

“I’m gonna be in LA in like, a week, Y/n,” Sophia replied, sitting up slightly in her bed. “We can’t keep doing whatever this is.” She gestured wildly between the two of you. She said it like it was common sense, as if it didn’t matter that she was breaking it off. Like it was only a fling—a small thing that lasted over the course of years.

In the back of your mind, during all those nights the two of you whispered sweet nothings into each other’s ears, you knew that it would eventually end. Sophia had even told you back when it first started, when the two of you were just young teenagers who didn’t know what to do with themselves. Said that you would be kept a secret. That your love couldn’t become a stain on her record, one that she would never be able to remove.

“I thought that you’d…” Your voice trailed off, letting the silence speak for itself.

“Y/n, I,” She exhaled. “I don’t know what to say. I need to stay focused there.”

“I wish I knew how to quit you.” Your voice trembled as you spat the words out, getting up from the bed, struggling to untangle your legs. “I wish I knew to stop earlier. Even if it was just to save myself.” 

Save yourself from this hurt, from this negligence. 

She didn’t move to stop you this time. Didn’t say anything at your hunched back and tears that shook your body to your core. She simply sat there quietly as you grasped around blindly for your clothes, sniffles following each sharp movement.

“I stayed with you for so long, Sophia. I stood beside you when no one else would. And you treat me like this.” Your words jumbled together as you stuttered through tears. You bet she couldn’t even understand anything you were saying. 

“But you didn’t want it. You couldn’t accept my soul even though I gave it up for you every damn day.”

It was embarrassing. 

It was stupid. 

It was immature. 

It was all those things mixed together. And you always knew the outcome would end up like this. But you couldn’t stop believing that maybe there’d be a reality where she accepted you. Didn’t fear what others would say or do.

You purposefully took longer grabbing all your things—just to see if she would call out to you and bring you back into her bed, right beside her, where you belonged. But it didn’t get any better when you managed to open the door to her room and she called out to you, voice quaking, but confident as ever.

“That won’t make me stay, Y/n! You won’t be the one to make me give up on my dreams.”

“I’ve never been the one that wanted you to give up Sophia. I thought you’d understand that by now.”

And you shut the door—gently—because no matter how much you hated to think of Sophia in the moment, you knew that you could never hurt her. Whether it were simply shutting her door too hard, or breaking up what you two had earlier on. Sophia controlled you, and you’d gladly offer up your entire being for her. You spent years of your life orbiting her as if the light she gave off was the only thing you needed to survive.

She said that she would call you every night when she was in Dream Academy. That she would update you on the drama and all the friends she made. 

Your phone didn’t ring once for the entire two years and for the first time in your life you weren’t surprised by something Sophia did.

You didn’t let yourself follow alongside Dream Academy. Didn’t vote. Didn’t even so much as go anywhere near news of the program. You didn’t want to see her face—to hear her voice and see her smile. To know that underneath all her layers she presented that you had been the first one to uncover each and every secret but still couldn’t make it known.

Just like that, the light of your life had dimmed so much that it was impossible to see anymore. The skin that you spent nights memorising, tracing images that could barely contain the love you felt for the person that owned it. The girl that you endlessly laughed with. The one that had decided to talk to you when no one else would. The little girl that didn’t ignore you—even after you hurt her. The woman that was a constant was no longer someone that you’d be able to see.

You spent two years forgetting all the hours spent in her shadow. Mending your broken heart from scratch.

You were in Los Angeles. The city that you thought you would never visit. The one that remained a danger zone deep inside your mind. 

But there was nothing to worry about. The chances of seeing her were slim, close to zero.

You were there for one reason and one reason only. A close friend had invited you to a concert. Said that the group was gaining in popularity after one of their recent releases. Six girls, all with different talents to showcase. All with different pasts and backgrounds.

Of course you agreed. It would be nice to get out of your hometown. Feel a different kind of air on your skin and revel in the largeness and mystery that Los Angeles had to offer. Travelling had always been on your list, and living in the small town you grew up in was never something you still wanted to be doing. But things happened, and you were still stuck there.

You didn’t bother asking your friend the name of the group. It didn’t matter. Your music tastes were similar enough and anything she listened to would probably be something you’d enjoy as well. Even if it weren’t, you’d still vibe out to it anyway, the energy of the concert taking over your limbs.

You waited in the stands with her, chatting away, the buzz of the crowd filling the spaces in your brain, hiding the doubts and the worries of being in the city that was a secondary source of all your pain.

And then the cheering started, and the girls walked out. You couldn’t see their faces properly, being behind someone that was taller, and the members were still a little too far back on the stage.

The music started, a beat that sent a thrumming from your ears into your brain and down into your feet, exploring all the extremities in your body. And then the girls moved forward. 

It was her. It was Sophia Laforteza in the flesh, after two years of trying to forget her. You quickly gripped your friend’s shoulders, screaming in her ears over the bass of the song.

“You didn’t tell me Sophia was in this group!” You tried yelling over the screams of the crowd and the volume of the song itself.

She heard a small part of your sentence and smiled, yelling in response, “You know Sophia?!”

You paused, running through things to say in your mind that would solve this situation before you revealed something that would hurt both her and you.

“I’ve seen her online!”

“That’s nice! At least you know one of them!” She screamed, cupping her hands to her mouth and leaning toward you.

“Yeah,” you mumbled, “I know her.” 

She tilted her head in confusion at your words, pointing a finger toward her ear, signalling that she couldn’t hear you. You waved her off and laughed, turning your attention back to the concert.

As they went through their set, you couldn’t help but only keep your eyes on Sophia. Her dancing had improved. So much. And as much as it pained you to say it you were glad that she had left.

She looked happy.

Your eyes stayed trained on her the whole time, and as they hit their final song, she scanned the crowd and her eyes landed on you. 

Your heart stopped, and it looked as if hers did too. She almost reached for one of her members but thought against it and let her arm fall limp against her side, her other hand holding the microphone up to her lips. 

She stared at you for practically the entirety of the last song, and at the end she mouthed something that you could barely read off of her lips.

“Meet me at the back.”

[meimalr]

BABY IT'S COLD INSIDE - SOPHIA LAFORTEZA

wordcount: 3k

tags: fluff, college!au, enemies (one sided) to lovers, kissing at the end

the heating is broken in your dorm room, and while you really hate your roommate, sophia, there was only one solution. sleeping together

The two of you had never been close. 

It was the night of the first day of classes, when the initial excitement of school was slowing down. Students were tired. Full blown conversations were turning into whispers and the occasional giggle. The hallways were clearing out, and you were snuggled in your bed, sheets pulled all the way up to your chin. While the day was fun and you would never deny that—constantly having to introduce yourself the same way over 50 times was definitely not the most interesting part of your day. You just wanted to close your eyes and sleep.

All was well until you heard the soft padding of footsteps in the dorm, venturing concerningly close to your dorm room’s front door. There was a click, and then light from the hallway started spilling into your dorm. Quiet voices could be heard as they giggled and whispered, and it only got worse as they seemed to be coming into the room and not leaving.

You tossed and turned, letting out an audible groan in hopes of having them feel guilty and leaving, but they only stopped for a moment making sure you were still sleeping before continuing.

“Sophia! I thought your roommate would be awake,” a voice whispered, her tone sharp but you could hear a hint of laughter behind it.

“I didn’t think she was a grandma, Lara. It’s literally only 9," Sophia whispered back, and the group of girls giggled as they moved around the room to sit on the other bed.

You weren’t old. You were simply tired after starting your day at the ass crack of dawn and only ending it a few hours ago. You had told Sophia you were going to knock out early. She nodded in response and made jokes about how tiring the first day was. You thought she had understood that that meant you wanted quiet. Apparently she didn’t.

That night—filled with endless laughter and repeated shushing—marked the day that you knew Sophia Laforteza would remain an enemy for the rest of the semester. 

“Did you hear the news?” Manon questioned as the two of you sat together on a bench on the school’s campus. You had met Manon months prior in one of your classes, and while you originally shied away from her friendly advances, she wouldn’t stop pestering you and eventually it blossomed into a close friendship.

“What news?” you replied, barely listening, a hand in your hair as you flipped through notes trying to absorb last minute information before a big test. 

“Some of the heating in the dorms isn't gonna be working for the next week. Admin suggested either finding another dorm with a friend or just living through it.” Manon glanced toward you at her words, but you didn’t reply. You didn’t even hear her.

She gave up on trying to talk to you and turned her attention to her phone, sighing and folding her body into her jacket to brace the cold wind that was hitting the both of you. 

It only hit you hours after she told you.

The both of you were eating out to celebrate the end of the first semester. The weather outside was freezing, and you were never one to appreciate the cold. 

“Wait,” you said, interrupting Manon as she talked about a class that was annoying her. She rolled her eyes and lowered her hands, used to your random outbursts. “Did you say the heating is broken in the dorms?”

“I said that like 6 hours ago. It’s broken on most of the third floor rooms.”

You blinked slowly and sat still for a moment.

“I live on the third floor.”

Your friend simply nodded, a ghost of a smile visible on her lips as your brain attempted to digest the information.

“With Sophia. The bane of my existence. The reason why I’m always over at your room.” You continued, and she kept nodding, the smile only growing wider. 

The solution was simple. You’d just room with Manon for the week again. You’ve shared a room with Manon for so long throughout the semester that you’d basically moved in. She lived a floor above, and her roommate Megan wouldn’t mind either. As you started to open your mouth she quickly ruined your night with her next words.

“You can’t room with me.” The words were sharp even if she meant to deliver them softly.

Silence. The utensils clanging against plates in the corners of the restaurant were the only things you could hear. 

You took a steady inhale. “Why?”

“Megan already invited some friends from the third floor. She got first dibs because I always have you over. Her words, not mine.” 

You decided then and there that you’d kill Manon and then you’d kill Megan soon after. 

“Please Manon.” You begged, hands clasped together and you even started reaching over the table to clasp her hands with yours. She let out a loud wheeze and started laughing uncontrollably at your despair.

“I’m not going to be on campus for the week, Y/n.” She couldn’t stop laughing at the pure despair on your face. “There’s no chance that Megan’s gonna let you in the room. Especially if I’m not there.” 

She didn’t understand how much you hated Sophia. This was the worst thing that could’ve happened.

You entered your dorm a little bit after you begged Manon for help. It was pointless and she only sat there in pity as you went on and on about your distaste for your roommate.

Sophia was on her bed, her blanket wrapped tightly around her body. Her glasses were perched on her nose as she balanced her laptop on her knees. You glanced over at her once before quickly looking away. Something in your heart reacted, but you pushed the emotion deep down and made your way to your own bed.

She silently glanced up at you before looking down at her computer again. You only knew a bit of Sophia’s schedule from other friends, but you knew that she still had one more class to finish before she would be on break as well. 

You slowly put your stuff down and summoned the courage to break the silence in the room.

“I’m going to head into the shower,” you said, rummaging through your belongings.

She hummed a response, not even giving you the time of day. 

As you looked through your stuff you realised that you made a mistake. Many of your things were still in Manon's room, including your towel. You hissed in annoyance and you could feel Sophia’s gaze on your back.

“Are you okay-”

“Do you have a spare towel-”

You both spoke at the same time, and you quickly apologised before stopping yourself because why were you apologising to Sophia Laforteza. 

“A spare towel?” She asked as she got up from under her blanket, placing her laptop beside her. Her shirt had ridden up slightly and you quickly averted your gaze, your face getting warmer at the sight.

She scanned her belongings before finding an extra towel and throwing it across the room at you. You fumbled with it before catching it.

“Thank you,” you mumbled, annoyed at the fact that you needed help from Sophia in the first place.

“You're welcome.” she responded as she moved back toward her bed, shivering slightly from the lack of heating. 

You had made another mistake. Apparently tonight was full of them. It was so cold inside your room that showering only made it worse no matter how warm you made the water. You were practically vibrating with cold once you finished your shower. Your solution was to throw on multiple sweaters, but that only made you uncomfortable as you laid on your bed, but it was better than freezing.

As you glanced to the other side of the room, you noticed that Sophia was most likely just as cold, if not worse off. She had given up on studying and had pulled her blanket up and over her head. The light of her phone was visible under the sheets and you could faintly hear her breathing which was the only indicator that she was still alive.

After tossing and turning for what felt like hours, you glanced at the clock to see that it read 11 at night. An annoyed breath escaped you, and you did what you never thought you would have done in a million years.

“So.” You awkwardly started, and the noise coming from Sophia’s phone quickly turned off, her head peeking from underneath the covers. “You still have classes, right?” 

“Yeah,” She said, a curious edge to her voice.

You nodded slowly, “That sucks. I just finished today.”

“Do you not have anything to wear that will make you warmer?”

Sophia rolled her eyes as if annoyed with you continuing the conversation.

“I had to do laundry, and somehow I ended up with none of my sweaters for tonight.”

“I see.”

She made no effort to continue the conversation, and you laid on your bed tensely as she stared at you in confusion. You looked over at her and saw that her cheeks had taken on a pinkish colour. The cold was obviously affecting her, and you didn’t know how she’d survive the whole night.

Unfortunately, you decided to speak up on the matter.

“Would you like to-” you paused, trying to think of a way to articulate yourself. “Would you maybe like to borrow one of my sweaters? Just because it’s really cold and you look like you’re freezing. I wouldn’t mind– well that is if you’re comfortable with that.” 

You cringed at your rambling and sank further down into your bed. 

“Sorry,” You mumbled in embarrassment.

“Could I?” Her voice overpowered yours.

“What?”

She rolled her eyes again, “Could I borrow one of your sweaters?” 

You didn’t expect her to actually take up on your offer. 

You nodded rapidly and shot up from your bed, taking one of the many sweaters you had on off.

“Oh. I thought you’d give me a different one.” she said, an eyebrow raised at you struggling to move your limbs.

“I’m kind of wearing all of them right now. The only other one I have has my name plastered all over it, I didn’t think you’d want it-”

“I’ll take that one,” she interrupted you again, and you only looked at her puzzled. You shrugged your shoulders and went to grab the offending sweater.

She stood up from her bed and thanked you, her hands touching yours as she grabbed the sweater from you. You almost flinched at how cold they were, and had the urge to put your hands around hers to warm them up.

No–

What were you saying? This was Sophia. The same Sophia that completely ruined your sleep schedule and had no respect for you several months ago. The same Sophia you never even gave a chance.

You slipped back under your covers and fell asleep quite quickly, not noticing the way Sophia peered over at your sleeping form with a certain look in her eyes.

You woke up in the morning to your sweater folded neatly and a note on top of it written in Sophia’s strangely beautiful handwriting.

Thanks for the sweater, Y/n.

-Sophia

A warm feeling spread throughout your chest.

“You’re joking,” Manon screeched as you flinched and held your phone away from your ears. “You talked to Sophia?”

“It was like a two minute conversation.” You rolled your eyes, forgetting that your friend couldn’t see you.

“You borrowed her towel, Y/n,” she said, and you sighed in response.

“That’s nothing serious. It was an extra one she doesn’t use.”

“Did anything else happen?”

“I gave her my sweater, she looked really cold-”

“You gave her your sweater!?” Manon screamed again, and it was loud enough that the people you were walking past could hear her through your phone. 

“Shut up!” You whisper shouted into your phone, hoping she would quiet down.

“Why didn’t you start with that? That’s like- next level relationship stuff,” Manon spoke, slightly calmer but still loud.

“We’re barely even acquaintances. I was just being nice.” You scoffed.

“Yeah, and next thing you know you’re introducing her to me as your girlfriend.” 

For some reason, the thought of Sophia being your girlfriend didn’t immediately overwhelm you in a feeling of disgust. Unfortunately, your quietness didn’t go unnoticed by your best friend.

“Y/n, are you seriously thinking about that?”

“No!” You shouted affronted. 

“Don’t lie to me Y/n. I know you too well. You like her.” 

“I literally don’t. I’ve barely spoken to her. I hate her and you know this.”

Manon only ignored you and continued laughing throughout the call. 

Somehow, the next night was colder than the last. It was seeping through your bones, and no matter how much you layered it was still freezing. Sophia had seemingly gotten her laundry, and was dressed much more appropriately than yesterday. You almost felt sad that she wouldn’t need your sweater again. Almost.

“Y/n.” She spoke out of the blue, and you shot up to attention.

“Yes?”

“It’s really cold,” she stated, and you almost laughed at how serious she sounded for such a simple observation.

“I noticed.”

“Come here.”

You chuckled.

Sophia didn’t say anything else.

You laughed again, but much more worried. She wasn’t joking. She rolled over in her bed to make space for you and turned her attention back to her phone. 

She was leaving it up to you.

She was evil. She had to have been put on this world to torment you.

She was beautiful. Even when her attention wasn’t on you, you could recognize her beauty. Her cheeks, slightly pink. The rise and fall of her chest. Her silky hair splayed out on her pillow.

She was absolutely beautiful, and you couldn’t help but get out of your bed and step toward her.

“Bring you blanket, stupid.”

You flushed in embarrassment before turning around and snatching your blanket off of its original home.

You were in front of her bed now, and she made no sound of disapproval as you slipped a leg under her own blanket and slowly eased down into it.

You were stiff, and you couldn’t help but lie on your back and stare straight up at the ceiling. 

After a few moments, she placed her phone somewhere and shifted slightly closer to you.

“Is this okay?” Sophia whispered somewhere in the air, her voice’s tone sending a shiver down your spine.

You nodded, knowing your words would betray you.

The two of you remained silent for a while, but you knew she wasn’t sleeping, and you weren’t fooling anyone either. 

“Why are you never in our dorm?” She questioned.

“Do you remember the first day of school?” You asked, still lying stiffly against her on the small bed.

“No.” She laughed, and her laugh sounded like music to your ears. “That was such a long time ago.” 

“I was trying to sleep, and you brought friends over. I couldn’t sleep for practically the whole night.”

Her laughing stopped for a moment, and then it started again, seemingly louder than before.

“You really hate me over that?” She sounded bewildered, and you flushed in embarrassment realizing how petty it was to hold such a grudge.

"It was more so because you said you had understood why I was so tired," You said, frustrated. You paused for a moment before adding, “I don’t hate you anymore,” You mumbled, and quickly regretted the words once they came out of your mouth.

Sophia stopped laughing at your expense and shifted closer to you again. Your body was impossibly still. She was close enough for you to feel her cold breath on your neck.

“Is that so?” She asked.

You turned to face her, taking in her full beauty. “I don’t think I ever hated you. I think I was just so frustrated and too petty to talk about.”

She started giggling again, and the way she threw her head back as her face scrunched up enamored you. You stared at her, gaze occasionally glancing down to her lips. 

Even though she was laughing at you and your unwillingness to communicate, you couldn’t help but start to laugh with her, heat rising to your cheeks. Such a small thing caused a giant rift between you two.

Deep down in your heart, you knew that Sophia was nice, one of the kindest people on campus. There were always anecdotes from other students of her helping around and trying her best. The truth was that you just never wanted to believe it after your first interaction with the girl.

Sophia eventually stopped laughing and laid her eyes on you, and you felt your mind go blank.

Before you could realize what you were doing, you reached your hand from underneath the blanket and touched Sophia’s cheek. Gently as first, and the cold of the room seemed to transform to heat that accumulated on her face as you flinched away. She reacted just as quick and held your hand there, looking at you intensely.

You hesitated, searching through Sophia’s eyes for any sort of message. Any sort of green light.

“Are you-”

Sophia was the one to close the distance.

Her lips pressed against yours in a featherlike touch, and your eyes fluttered shut at the feeling. Her hands were cold as she pressed them against your cheeks, and your own hands dropped to the front of her shirt, gripping it tight as if it could ground you further into the moment.

It was soft at first, and she backed away from it just as fast as it came.

And then she leaned in again and pressed her lips to yours—harder this time—filled with emotion that you never thought your roommate could harbor. 

You didn’t know what you were doing, but nothing mattered at the moment. The chill of the room was absent as you pressed closer to Sophia, tangling your legs with hers underneath the sheets. Her lips were soft and warm, a welcoming feeling compared to the sharpness of the air between you. It was intoxicating, and you couldn’t help but let yourself become poisoned by her.

The kiss ended only because of the lack of oxygen travelling between you, and she pressed her forehead against yours. Both of your bodies were warm, hot even.

“I-”

“We could’ve done that months ago if you had just talked to me,” Sophia said, a pink to her cheeks that wasn’t just due to the cold anymore.

Then she climbed on top of you, straddling you, her mouth connecting with yours once again.

Manon was gonna pass out once she heard about this.

[meimalr]

NAVIGATION

welcome to my blog!

hi! i'm meimalr and i enjoy writing so i decided to write fanfics! (wlw) i'll mostly be writing for katseye, but i could try writing for other girlgroups. i do not write nsfw. the most i'll write is slight suggestiveness and i don't write for minors. i love taking requests, just stay respectful of me and my boundaries please. i don't always have the time nor dedication to write so i'm sorry in advance.

MASTERLIST

MANON

⇢

SOPHIA

⇢ baby it's cold inside

⇢ crawling back to you

DANIELA

⇢

LARA

⇢

MEGAN

⇢