mehusalah

[mehusalah]

So today I suddenly had my period which is really rare since I haven't had my period for like a year if not more but suddenly now I do and I am bleeding to my death here and now I am just 15 I don't have much experience in putting on a pad because I never had many days were I had to put on a pad and I had my period like early in the morning but I only noticed it at around 6 am because that's when I had woken up so immediately took a bath and changed my clothes can tried to put on a pad I wanted to ask my older sister for help but she was asleep so I put one pad on my underwear myself which wasn't enough so I put on another one and this time I thought it was enough that I have done it properly but guess what? I hadn't since my sister who had woken up saw the period stains on my clothes and what she did? Started yelling she didn't even try to explain to me that I had stains on my clothes and that I didn't put my pad on properly no she just yelled at me and told me to change my pad and while I was changing my pad she was just there still complaining and yelling I did try to explain myself that I wasn't my fault that I even put two pads on to make sure it doesn't happen but it happen and guess what she did? Yelled at me more because the two pad I had used were her big and high quality one that she had saved so things like traveling or going to party while she had her period and now they are wasted... Like I am sorry I used your high quality pads that don't do their job at all and still cause period stain like it's totally my fault that I am not a professional at using pads like I am sorry you are seven years older then me so have more experience in using pads I should have just been born sooner so I could have more experience so obviously I started crying because my stomach is already in enough pain and now she just won't shut up like listen for a moment like try and understand the worst thing about this she didn't even looked at me like I was trying to convince her to just look and see for herself if I put the pads properly on or not but she kept refusing and when she finally decided to look she was silent for moment because she knew I put the pad on correctly the way she does because she is the one who taught me how to put the pad on but still she did kept complaining this time more silently but she did said sorry after a bit like wow your sorry fixed everything every single one of my tears has rolled back in my eyes again thank you for your understanding but you know I can't even tell if she is guilty on not because she out her happily smiling and talking with her friends and neighbors like do you even feel guilt? How can you speak so happily after making the one you share blood with cry so much because you were 'confused' and didn't realize it wasn't my fault like sure you were confused then why didn't you listened when I tired to explain why didn't you look when I begged you so