megameatymatt

[megameatymatt]

"I know you're tired of arguing"

"but no screaming and shouting"

no warnings, just angst | lower case intended

the distance between you and Chris became unbearable. it all started from a stupid, silly argument. tears flood your eyes when you think of the night, he was pleading and begging for you to stay. you never would of thought you'd regret leaving that house. It became a second home to you. it's been almost 3 weeks and not a day has gone by that you didn't cry yourself to sleep. you felt like an idiot for throwing it all away after he only messed one thing up. it wasn't about right or wrong anymore. It was just the fact that you felt suffocated, it felt as if you couldn't breathe without him. you know deep down you need him, but the courage to call, text, send a voicemail or even voice memo at that, maybe even show up at his door, would never build up.

embarrassment flooded you because who knows how he felt, he could have moved on the day later for all you know. maybe you were just the loser that stayed there, stayed where he left you. but it only felt right to go back, its what was needed.

12:58 am

your fingers trembled over the keyboard. your shaky breath hitched with every move, your thoughts were running wild but you were only focused on one, "typing out the word hey". you wanted to do it but it took minutes, you were just sitting there soaking in your worries. you felt your heart pounding as your fingers moved to each letter, then the send button.

only a few seconds later, chris read your text. your eyes were watering, you were chewing on your nails anticipating the text. it was quick, too quick. almost immediately he texted back "hey can we talk?"

you didnt know how to feel. was this a good thing? how would it end? how would the conversation even start? you had no clue where to take it, deep down you felt like you need to see him. not just over a screen, whether it's a little too blunt or strong you felt the need to ask to see him in person. itd fill a void that's been gone for weeks now, you cant sleep without him, without him being there. impulsively you sent back, "you could come over" your heart raced, the few seconds between him reading and then typing felt like forever. but it was scary watching him type, what if that was too far? it was shocking to see "be there in 10".

you didn't know what quite to do, do you clean the messes in your apartment, should you change out of your pajamas? you texted back and okay before getting up and brushing your hair, brushing your teeth and lazily clean your room. you were in a sort of trace until you heard a familiar knock. it was the same knock you heard everyday, the knock that'd bring you comfort to hear. you stepped over to the door, standing in front of it unsure of how to greet him. your fingers shook as they latch on to the doorknob, and your heart pounded as you turned it.

once you opened the door you looked up to see chris. you meet eyes with his sleep deprived, exhausted eyes. his hair was messy, and face was pale. he was wearing a black shirt, black sweatpants and uggs. it was obvious he didnt expect this, you were standing there in a sweat set so the same was obvious for you.

authors note: this is obviously unfinished, if im being honest I had a hard time continuing it so im posting this and if you guys want a part 2 ill make one! this has literally been in my drafts for like 3 months so I hope you guys like it <3

divider: @parfajt

taglist: @iloveduckssm @megameatymatt @chriscantwhisper ask to be on my taglist in the comments! <33

[megameatymatt]

“i’m bad at social cues” okay so am i but i don’t tell people their pussies are extra tight…..

[megameatymatt]

i giggled

chris sturniolo smut

18 PLUS ONLY THIS IS VERY EXPLICIT !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

he flicked ur clih for 55 hours 55 days

[megameatymatt]

This is so disappointing and fucking DISGUSTING to hear

If you're a weird ass bitch who supports rose, please unfollow and block me immediately.

tags for awareness: @seaouidbabyx, @starrii-sturns @slvt4chrissturniolo

my experience with rose

i feel like it's finally my turn to say something. i've kept this to myself for so long but seeing people still love rose, and now that she's finally gone i can't stay quiet anymore.

i was 15. the whole time i was so confused. she would constantly talk sexual with me, telling me about her fantasies and making comments i didn't even understand yet. she asked me to call with her, and on those calls she'd always bring up sexual stuff. i didn't know what to say. i just remember feeling weird, uncomfortable like i had to just sit there and go along with it even though i didn't want to.

eventually i blocked her. she blocked me back, and then i deactivated. since then tumblr hasn't felt safe for me. every time i see her name or people saying how much they love her it brings all of it back.

i think this is the last time i'll ever be on here. i don't even know why i'm writing this except that i just want to finally be heard. i've carried this for so long in silence and maybe it doesn't even matter anymore but it matters to me.

the worst part is i barely have any screenshots because i deactivated my account back then. that makes me scared no one will believe me. it scares me that most of this only exists in my memory and maybe only i will ever know what truly happened.

sometimes i feel like maybe i'm being dramatic. like maybe i overreacted or made it bigger than it was. but then i remember how sick it made me feel, how confused i was how i didn't even know what to say when she would start talking sexual with me. i was 15. that shoulve been enough for her to know it was wrong

i don't know. maybe i'll regret posting this maybe people won't believe me, but at least i finally said it out loud.

please i beg, interact with this any way i really want to feel heard it feels like im being dramatic but then I remember how much it still bothers me.

tags for awareness@cvnntagious @darksturnz @y3sterdaysproblem @passionfruitchris @nickssidewitch @humpster35

[megameatymatt]

CUM. BACK.

😭😭 I'm right here mama

[megameatymatt]

AMARA ML

ADIRAAA BABYYY

[megameatymatt]

i could cry i’m so proud of him 😭😭😭😭

[megameatymatt]

I love my blog, but lately I've literally had no motivation to actually use it till now. So be good girls and spam my inbox before I loose interest again xx 💋

[megameatymatt]

this is so cute wtf

★ Y/N DOE'S MOOD-BOARD★

©gracie-angels ★ Y/N, 20 ★ she/her ★ Bisexual ★ Instagram Model ★ Dyed Blonde hair ★ Blue Eyes ★ Nate's Sister ★ Party Animal ★ Monster ★ Beach Pics ★ Nessa's Blondie ★ Purple ★ Boston, MA ★ Music ★ Make Up ★ All things Stars ★

[megameatymatt]

Hi to all my moots i accidentally ghosted, i've missed you gays. Anyways I'm back now, I love you guyss🤍🤍🤍🤍

[megameatymatt]

Oh my gosh, the pink theme is so so cutee ugh, girly can we be moots? xx

thank you babess!! sorry i took long, i haven't been active in a while. Ofc we can be moots (ur theme is literally so cute btw🤍🤍)

[megameatymatt]

its my birthday

[megameatymatt]

this is my new personality for the rest of the year

"are you coming?" yeah on the screen, catch!

[megameatymatt]

i had to pick my jaw up off the floor

[megameatymatt]

i actually need him

#needthat (dani ill share him with you)

[megameatymatt]

hi!!!! missed you sweetie<3

Hi angel!!! I missed you too! I love ur theme!!

[megameatymatt]

mood