maydeena

[maydeena]

thanking myself for not saying sorry when I am not in the wrong

[maydeena]

I feel so out of it lately

[maydeena]

Why do I feel worse each passing day? I feel like I am sinking further and further.

[maydeena]

You always have that clear blue sky ahead while I am constantly in a stormy night.

[maydeena]

Dulu salah satu teman pas kkn kalau ngasih nama kontak baru selalu dikasih nama lengkap. Mau sepanjang apapun namanya pasti ditulis semua. Sementara aku lebih terbiasa dengan nama_kelas/univ/jalur kenal lewat apa. Waktu itu sempat nanya alasan dia menggunakan cara penamaan itu. Jawaban tepatnya jujur lupa tapi kayaknya gak beda jauh dari ‘just because’. Ya akupun kalau ditanya kenapa menggunakan cara yang biasa aku gunakan ya there was not any particular reason either. Mungkin karena orang pertama yang aku lihat menamai kontak seperti itu or another just because. Terus habis itu ngecek nama kontak aku disimpan sebagai apa, ditunjukkin lah dan benar dikasih nama lengkap. Saat itu kesan yang aku dapatkan dengan namaku adalah ‘oh it felt good’, mungkin baper ya istilah sekarang. The thought that people only remember you for who you are without any label is really satisfying. Semenjak itu, tiap ngasih nama kontak jadi ngikutin selalu ngasih nama lengkap. This is only my personal preference because I want to treat others like I want to be treated.

[maydeena]

Nejma, Nayyirah Waheed

[maydeena]

I’m not good at hiding my expression and I’m not a people-person. So I give off the wrong impression often. Honestly, I don’t care how people think of me. So, I didn’t mind giving the wrong vibes. But I can’t always rely on that. There will always a time when I have to show an appropriate emotion in certain circumtances. Why is it so hard to survive?

[maydeena]

kemaren2 udah mikir kalo ada konsernya tetep ga nonton, tapi abis liat ini kayak oh no bagus banget!

[maydeena]

I always thought that human is the most selfish kind of being God ever made. So, it is not reasonable to not know that something has happened or changed in your life. If you are not aware of yourself, then who would?

[maydeena]

Kemarin kan jaga nih pas hari ulang tahun. Terus hampir semua nanya, lah kok malah jaga? Sebagai orang yang emang bikin jadwal harusnya sangat bisa ya buat jadwal gak jaga pas hari H. Dan yaudah bukan sengaja atau gak sengaja juga sih. Karena emang lagi madetin aja biar libur di akhir bisa agak banyak karena mau liburan. Sebagai orang yang memang tidak terbiasa merayakan ulang tahun, birthday has never been a special day for me. It just like any other day.

btw ini foto kue yang dikasih dari komdik

who is Naya? 🫠

[maydeena]

[maydeena]

The love language that we speak isn’t always the same one we need to hear in return

I once read from I-forget-where to make a credit

[maydeena]

udah di post juga tetep aja kejadian lagi 😢

Berkali-kali diingatkan Allah untuk tidak pernah bergantung kepada manusia.

Semoga dengan di post jadi selalu ingat.

[maydeena]

the moment you don’t listen and I am too lazy to explain, that’s when we drift apart.

[maydeena]

Ugh. How I really hate the way I get 1000th more sensitivie on my period.

[maydeena]

It doesn’t sit right with me to pretend that something did not happen when it actually did. I know I made a lot of mistakes but it did not make you always right. Maybe our closeness blurred the line we should respect as a co-worker. But, I just want to remind you not only to look at the bad or good side. Please be mindful of that.

[maydeena]

Berkali-kali diingatkan Allah untuk tidak pernah bergantung kepada manusia.

Semoga dengan di post jadi selalu ingat.