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Gay.

buck comes to eddie's house 8.08

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"what are you looking at, eddie" i'm SCREAMING. the flirty head tilt, the smirk, the look, the hip cock. buck king of failing the 'be normal with your best friend while in a kitchen' challenge since 2019 🙌

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#yeah

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He is seeking joy lmao

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the probability of a character being gay if he's never stated his sexuality is like, a good 10%. but the moment someone takes care to write him into an awkward situation where he believes another man is flirting with him and he goes 'oh um ah. no. i'm straight' well haha. let's just say. one billion

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And the juice scene where is says “I’m straight” he is wearing black 👀👀

fun fact: eddie has worn white or off white a few times in s8 so far. his color palette is this:

the darker his shirt is, the more he’s hiding himself. the lighter it is, the more he’s being true to himself. the shirt in 808 will be the first time he wears bright white.

when eddie wears dark colors, he’s hiding his feelings, wearing a mask, whether it’s about chris or buck or himself. at work, he’s trying to turn that part of himself off even if he fails. he’s not going to let people see how he feels because these moments aren’t about him. they’re about chris, buck, hen and karen, or the patients he’s caring for.

when he’s wearing light/off white colors, it’s when he’s uncovering parts of himself or sharing his feelings with someone. he’s revealing a little piece of his identity and emotions/mental state. the lighter the shirt is, the more of himself he’s giving away. the talk with bobby is the first time he’s said out loud how he feels about chris being gone. the scene with the cheerleader’s dad was a place of projection. the dancing scene is the first time he’s experienced authenticity in years. maybe ever.

that’s why the confessions scene is so interesting. he’s wearing a white inner layer, he’s sharing the parts of himself close to his chest, but he’s still got a wall up in the church. he’s hiding Something that he wants to understand and share, but isn’t ready yet. and maybe nobody will know unless he says it himself.

but all this to say, i think eddie in a stark white shirt is not only alluding to s4 and an nde, but will be the final puzzle of him realizing his feelings towards buck.

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I know that we didn’t really get any Eddie character development or advancements in his plot this episode, but I still think it was clear that he’s making progress

Like I honestly cannot remember a single time where he was just being loose and silly and fun like he was this episode. It might not be front and centre, but it’s there

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840 frames of eddie diaz

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Hello, I'm lana from gaza 💔🍉I’m sorry to disturb you, and I hope you're doing well. Unfortunately, I am not. Please, imagine yourself in my place: three months ago, we emerged from the rubble of our home. I lost my grandfather and my aunt, and my father was seriously injured, with shrapnel lodged in his chest—he urgently needs surgery. My mother is also in severe pain, suffering from back issues. As the eldest, I now bear the responsibility for my family, with no source of income left due to the war.

We have no money for food, water, or medical treatment. We left our home with nothing and now sleep in a tent, shivering from the cold, without clothes or blankets. I travel far just to access the internet to ask for help. Please, don't let me down; even $20 would make a huge difference. I’m carrying the weight of my mother, father, and siblings on my shoulders...🙏

https://chuffed.org/project/113891-help-lana-trough-these-dark-days-in-gaza

<3

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There's a really funny fic premise somewhere in here where Buck realises he has feelings for Eddie, and that Eddie has feelings for him, but instead of dating Eddie about it, he starts trying to aggressively matchmake Eddie with other men so that Eddie can get his APPARENTLY DOOMED?? first queer relationship out of the way with someone who isn't him.

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it is november, and yesterday it felt like it was supposed to be snowing. in boston, november used a winter month, not a fall month. it is supposed to be chilly; rarely capping over 45F. it is a sweater-and-jacket month. it is a "maybe a scarf too" month. in my childhood, november meant blizzards and sleet.

it did not snow. tomorrow the weather predicts a high of 76.

i have spent so many years of my life studying the longterm possibilities of climate change - the culmination of capitalism wreaking havoc on the bodies of people, animals, plants - but every so often i am still shocked by something small and personal.

in a hundred years, when someone goes outside in boston - will they know the feeling of "snow in the air"?

i know it's a learned feeling, a sensation that maybe only longterm experience can teach. a few years ago, i was walking with my friend who had just moved up from the south. i said it smells like snow and she gave me this look like - what the fuck. i said it feels like snow too, which didn't help. she looked up to the bright blue sky and then back at me and then back at the sky. 12 hours later, we had 3 inches. you can just tell if it's going to snow.

except i can't tell, anymore. i stand outside in a tee shirt and watch my dog dance around a lake. we're in a drought and the skin of the water has peeled back twenty meters. the lake is tamed, quiet, puddlelike and sour. my pokemon go app warns there's a weather condition in my area.

my dog gets too hot from running and sits in the water and i want to laugh about his long frame and how awkwardly he sits - and i can't. some simian part of my brain is scratching the walls. it was supposed to snow. it was supposed to snow, but now it's warm instead.

during the last full solar eclipse, the dogs and the birds and the crickets went crazy under utter darkness. we laughed at them then, promising it will all be okay in a moment. but some part of me is still locked in that long night: some animal sensation.

something is wrong, my body says. i can't afford eggs or rent. i go outside to watch a sunset and listen to birdsong. i don't bring a jacket. allergies are killing me this season, allergies i didn't have as a kid. everyone comments that halloween has started to feel strange, offkilter. that it's hard having "holiday cheer." my body thinks it's april, and then it thinks we're in september, and then june.

something is terribly wrong, she whispers. go outside. it is supposed to be snowing.

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close enough welcome back november 5th 2020

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And what if I tell you that Eddie looking at Buck through the peephole was a callback to the confession booth?? 🫣🫣🫣

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eddie organic fruit leather. buck says lube, flying in ok eddie. eddie ring pop blowjob. eddie reaches for fruit juice but then goes for water because he’s Denying himself. he’s straight and he has the mustache (which is a mask) because the lafd doesn’t allow him to have a beard. and now he’s shaved the mustache off. ok.

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buck, bbg we need to have a chat

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eddie putting away the fruity drink juice for water and immediately calling himself straight and then being told he’s denying himself happiness OH I’M SURE

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"The lafd doesn't allow beards."

"It's a disguise"

Oh ok yeah cool